• Published 15th May 2012
  • 735 Views, 22 Comments

The Equestrian School of Hackercraft and Villainy - benxlabs

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Chapter 3: Villainy 101

Why is it that all heroes, antiheroes, protagonists, whatnot-ists, all start from the humblest origins? Some were abandoned at birth, some left for dead. But again, there'd be nothing interesting about a Bob that came from a extraordinarily ordinary family, would there? But why would anyone name their filly Bob? That's not even close to a pony name. But then again, neither is Akihiro.

Akihiro was teetering on the verge of an outburst, something rare for those of higher intellect. The AI responsible for him being synthesized with a special "school uniform" was certainly not acting like a well coded AI. For some reason, it seemed incapable of pronouncing his name, insisting on calling him "Ae-ke-he-roo Tae-kae-hi-shi". Despite numerous attempts to override the pronunciation guide. The AI also seemed very inconsistent with its measurements, measuring every limb about 15 times a minute, declaring "measurements invalid, data revoked". At length, he even considered rewiring the entire damn thing.


But the dice had been cast, and there was no turning back. After about 20 minutes of teeth grinding errors, a small toaster looking device located at the back of the small room made a crisp beep. Shortly thereafter, a neatly folded bundle of clothes shot out at a breakneck speed, nearly killing Akihiro in the process. Yet here was his new "school uniform", and he would have to wear it. He took it by the collar and examined it. The uniform was quite well made, yet reminded him of something out of science fiction movie. He scoffed. What did he think he was talking about? This was the era of technological revolution! Science Fiction? Bah! That was the stuff of a millenia ago! Nonetheless, one would agree, the uniform looked very much like a black and white body suit from Tron. He slipped into it, discovering that it was quite malleable, despite its appearance.

But that being said, it also seemed to be quite durable. Touching the surface revealed that the surface was more similar to that of fiberglass. Perhaps the interior was comprised of a skintight body suit composed of gore-tex, or other similar material, with a fiberglass shell on the exterior. However, fiberglass was a thermoplastic, and would remain too stiff for the freedom of movement I am currently employing. Carbon fibers, then? No, carbon fibers would be even stiffer. The mysteries of his school uniform would have to wait.

He stepped out out his porta potty device, and looked around for his classmates. His cold eyes calculated his surroundings, and to his slight surprise, his classmates had donned suits of different colors. The range was limited however, to certain color schemes. To his disgust, the majority of the debilitated students had donned uniforms similar to his own. His scowl deepened when he saw his acquaintances, the stalwart martial artist and the street smart thief both wearing different uniforms than his own.

Perhaps the color of uniform is assigned depending on the student's abilities. That would put the black and white uniforms as those specializing in intelligence, while the red and white uniforms were worn by those better suited for physical tasks. The blue and white uniforms appeared to be given to those excelling in gymnastics and acrobatics, similar to the thief. His disdain showed only in his eyes, however, and the 2 came over upon seeing him.

Oblivious to his ponderous state, she gave him a hearty slap on the back and shouted into his ear: "Hey, if it ain't ol' Kiro Hero!" The interruption startled him, which basically means he opened his eyes a bit wider. He turned toward his audible assailant. "Yes?" Before the pie-loving pony could answer, Iron Hoof broke in. "It appears this is where we part ways, for we will be attending separate classes due to our different interests." Peach looked crestfallen. Completely, utterly, crestfallen. "B-but...I thought...we...we w-would be together...for...f-forever!" Her eyes widened to massive proportions, and childish tears welled up in her boundless eyes.

"Please refrain from such unsophisticated behavior. It is quite disdainful." Akihiro was completely unmoved by this display of loyalty to her new "friends". She is so naive. Does she truly believe me to be a friend to her? Innocence is a virtue, and yet in the real world, brings naught but disappointment and despair. Accomplices we were, but now they are only tools to assist in my escape. Having informants in multiple locations is a must in order for successful intelligence gathering. That is one of the basics of espionage.

It wouldn't do him any good to alienate the few acquaintances he had, so he decided to simply "smile", and say: "Even if we have been assigned to various incongruous sub-sects of this commodious latitude, it would certainly be of benefice for us to maintain an affiliation, at least at this present time." Peach sniffled a little, smiled, and gave a little nod. Akihiro turned and prepared to start a methodical exploration of his new prison, when he suddenly found himself put into a headlock by the pony that had been all rainbows and sunshine a few seconds ago.

"Well, yer fancy speech was touchin' and all, but ya' don't think you could put it inta somethin' more resemblin' equestrian? Ya know?" She continued to partially strangle the unfortunate foal while smiling in a less friendly, more...interesting way. Akihiro was doing his best to resist gagging. He was never one for athletics, and such a position rendered him quite helpless. As he was quite helpless, he was quite pissed. "I would greatly appreciate it if you removed your appendages from my trachea and permitted my normal respiratory function!"


It took quite some time and quite a large effort on the part of a certain Iron Hoof to quell the dispute. Peach was eyeing Akihiro suspiciously and Akihiro was rubbing his sore throat, but at least they weren't literally at each other's throats anymore. With that little spat behind them, the three musketeers went their separate ways. For the time being, at least.

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Comments ( 1 )
Oni

597207 they are rather good.

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