I Prefer Show Tunes

by Harmony Charmer

Chapter 3: Unadulterated Hatred

"I can't believe this!" Button cried out, collapsing into his chair. "I got cast as an old dude! This is the..." He paused, then counted to himself for a moment before resuming his dramatic behavior. "Third most embarrassing thing to ever happen to me!"

"Third?" Apple Bloom asked, looking up from the craft table where she was painting a couple of stars for the set. "Ya mean to say that there's not one, but two more embarrassing things than this for you?" Her eyes widened and she shuddered a bit before shaking her head. "Never mind, Ah don't wanna know..."

"Yeah, I'm not surprised," Scootaloo commented, though she didn't seem to care. "Besides, it's not that big a deal. At least you still got a big part!"

"But, now I'm not gonna be paired with Sweetie!" Button protested. "And Rumble gets to-- Ugh!" He crossed his forelegs in anger and pouted. "I can't believe Cheerilee is gonna let him kiss Sweetie!"

Sweetie didn't seem to hear him. "Diamond Tiara's gonna kill me... She's gonna kill me, and she's gonna get to play Luna for the play... And then she's gonna dance on my grave to rub it in my face. She'll probably do a parody of 'The Night Will Last Forever' while she's at it."

Button frowned. "Sweetie! Are you even listening to me?"

Sweetie blinked, then turned towards him with a blank look on her face. "Uh, sorry, did you say something?"

He groaned. "I can't believe you're not freaking out about this! Rumble and you are going to kiss! Why aren't you up and hooves over it like I am?!"

Sweetie frowned at him. "Because, it's kinda not a big deal...? We're just acting, and I don't think Cheerilee's gonna let us kiss anyway. That's for big productions, not school productions." She paused. "I think."

"But, you two are still romantic interests!" Button exclaimed, glaring at her. "Why aren't you upset over that?"

Sweetie huffed angrily. "Because I have bigger things to worry about! I'm going to be stuck practicing with Diamond for two hours a day for the next couple of weeks! Do you have any idea how terrible it's going to be for me to sit there and watch her show off?"

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom rolled their eyes. "Yeah, she's showing off," Scootaloo commented, though Sweetie didn't hear her.

"Alright, everypony, time to get into places!" Cheerilee called out, breaking through the group. "Now, let's get to into the storytelling!"

Sweetie Belle sighed in annoyance as she trotted onstage, where Diamond Tiara stood. She rolled her eyes at the other filly's "hmmph" of annoyance, and she walked to a respectable distance.

"Alright, now, let's get on with the song in which Platinum and Luna meet for the first time! And... action!"

As the music started, the two fillies turned from each other, then recited their lines.

(Diamond Tiara)
Dear darling-est and wonderful Princess Celestia...

(Sweetie Belle)
My dear sister...

(Both)
There's been some confusion over rooming in the castle

(Sweetie Belle)
But of course I'll keep to my duties

(Diamond Tiara)
But of course, it won't be a hassle!

(Both)
For I know that's how I must respond, yes.
There's been some confusion, for you see my neighbor is...

(Diamond Tiara)
Unusually and distinctively personal
And all together quite impossible to say...?

(Sweetie Belle)
...Blonde.

Then, both fillies turned to each other, as if noticing each other for the first time. Diamond blinked in surprise, as did Sweetie, and both stared at each other in silence for a long moment.

(Diamond Tiara)
What is this feeling,
So sudden and new?

(Sweetie Belle)
I felt the moment,
my eyes fell on you

They began circling the stage, their eyes never leaving each other as they did.

(Diamond Tiara)
My heart is pulsing

(Sweetie Belle)
My hooves are numbing

(Diamond Tiara)
Good Lord, I'm repulsing!

(Both)
What is this feeling?
The feeling seems to burn
But does it have a term?

Their circling became closer and the two of them were suddenly very close to each other.

(Both)
Yes!

They stopped right in front of each other simultaneously.

(Both)
Hating!
Unadulterated hating!

(Diamond Tiara)
For your dress!

(Sweetie Belle)
Your horn.

(Diamond Tiara)
So grating!

(Both)
Let's just say that...

They looked each other up and down, then frowned in digust.

(Both)
I hate it all!
Every little detail, no matter size
Makes me want to groan and sigh

With simple, utter hating
There's an acceleration
With each conversation
It's pure, so wrong!

Though I do admit it came on quick,
It keeps on sucking like a tick!
And I will be hating, hating you
My whole life!

Then, a crowd of schoolkids came in, including Twist, Snips, Snails, and all the other ponies who didn't get a big part.

(Crowd)
Dear Platinum, you are just too kind!
This sort of thing boggles the mind!
She's a monster, she's a terror!
We don't mean to show any bias,
But, Platinum, you're our sharer!

(Diamond Tiara)
Well... These things are meant to try us!

(Crowd)
Poor Platinum, forced to reside
Next to someone so awful inside!
We just want to show you
That we're all on your side!

The crowd glared at Sweetie collectively, and she wasn't sure if it was genuine or not.

(Crowd)
We share your hating!

Diamond and Sweetie began to circle each other again, this time more predatory than the first.

(Both)
What is this feeling,
So sudden and new?

(Crowd)
Unadulterated hating!
For her dress, her horn, so grating!

(Both)
I felt the moment,
My eyes fell on you!

(Crowd)
Let's just say...

(Both)
My heart is pulsing!
My hooves are numbing!

(Crowd)
We hate it all!

(Both)
Oh, what is this feeling?

(Crowd)
Every little trait no matter size...

(Both)
Does it have a term?

(Crowd)
Makes us want to groan and sigh!

(All)
Yes, aaaaaaaah!

(Crowd)
Hating!

(Both)
Hating!

(Crowd)
Hating!

(Both)
There's a strange acceleration

(Crowd)
Hating!

(Both)
With every conversation!
It's pure, so wrong!

(Crowd)
So wrong!

(Both)
Though I do admit it came on quick,
It keeps on sucking like a tick!

(Crowd)
Hating!

(Both)
And I will be hating you for forever!

(Crowd)
Hating, hating, hating you!

(Both)
Loathing, truly, deeply, loathing you--!

(Crowd)
Hating you our whole life long!

(Both)
My whole life long!

As the two stood in front of each other, glaring, Sweetie smirked and jumped up. "Boo!"

"Ahh!" Diamond shrieked, before reverting to a glare as Sweetie laughed.

"Cut!" Cheerilee called out. She sighed. "Sweetie, you can't scare Diamond like that."

Sweetie frowned. "But, that's what happened in the play!"

"Well, yes, but you can't actually scare her," Cheerilee said. "It's a bit mean spirited.

Sweetie sighed. "Yes, Miss Cheerilee..."

Diamond grinned, but ceased when Cheerilee spoke to her. "Also, Diamond? Perhaps you shouldn't sing so loudly... I could barely hear Sweetie Belle."

Diamond frowned, then rolled her eyes. "Yes, Miss Cheerilee..." She cut a glare to Sweetie Belle. "Try not to outshine me next time, Sweetie Belle. You wouldn't want anything to go badly for you, right?"

Sweetie gritted her teeth in annoyance as Diamond stalked off the stage, but she didn't have time to really dwell in her anger when Cheerilee called out for the next scene.

"Alright, so how about we skip over 'Something Dark', and go straight to 'Going Through Life'?"

Suddenly, Diamond was back onstage next to Sweetie in a millisecond. "Wait, what?"

"But, that scene's so important!" Sweetie protested, the scene milling through her mind.

"It's supposed to be when Luna speaks with Starswirl and begins to question her place as princess!" Diamond shouted, mortified and shocked.

"And it's supposed to be the moment where she begins to show her doubt--" Sweetie added.

"And her true character, which--"

"--foreshadows her transformation in 'The Night Will Last Forever' where she turns into Nightmare Moon!" they finished together. They both looked to each other in shock, then began to glare as they got over their surprise.

"Just what do you know about Luna's characterization?" Diamond sneered.

"I could say the same thing to you," Sweetie growled, leaning in aggressively.

Cheerilee stepped between them. "You know, if you two are so keen on practicing your songs, then maybe you could practice together outside of rehearsal?"

Sweetie and Diamond backed away from each other. "Ugh, as if!"

Cheerilee frowned. "I see... Well, on with the next scene, then."

* * *

Button fumed silently as he watched Rumble sing onstage with the rest of the cast, and he crossed his forelegs angrily. "Stupid Rumble and his stupid singing voice... I can't believe I'm stuck back here while he gets to have all the fun out there."

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. "Dude, let it go. We both know that Sweetie isn't gonna go for him because she likes you too much. Besides, I don't think he likes her that way."

"Probably 'cause he likes you instead?" Apple Bloom suggested, waggling her brows.

Scootaloo glared at her. "No!" She turned away with a huffy expression, then looked back in interest. "You think so?"

Apple Bloom rolled her eyes. "Whatever." She turned her attention back to the stage, then frowned as she watched Sweetie and Diamond sing together. "I'm a bit worried about Sweetie... Y'all don't think that this is goin' to her head, do ya?"

Button "hmmph"ed. "Doesn't matter to me. Oh, or to her, because she obviously doesn't understand what I'm going through! I'm suffering and she doesn't care!" He collapsed onto the floor. "Agony!"

Scootaloo rose her brows. "Or maybe she's just a bit swept up in the play? I mean, you saw how aggressive she got when she got up there."

Apple Bloom nodded in agreement. "Yeah, it's kinda freakin' me out. Especially at how they were agreein' about the songs and stuff."

Button sat up instantly. "What?! She's making nice with the enemy?!"

"Yeah, scarily enough," Scootaloo said, looking at the two fillies. She sighed a bit in relief when they sent each other mean glares and stalked away from each other to continue on with a another song. "Well, I guess it's not too bad. Besides, it's not like they're friends or anything, right?"

"Yeah, outside the play," Apple Bloom commented. "Remember how she said that Platinum and Luna become friends or somethin'?"

"Yeah, but that's just acting!" Scootaloo said, looking over at the stage. She frowned a bit as she saw Rumble and Sweetie talking to each other, then shook her head. "Yeah... Just acting..."

Author's Note:

Yet another parody~! So, yeah, have fun with this! Also, oooooo, does Diamond actually KNOW something about the musical? You'll just have to wait and see! Oh, and here's what Platinum and Clover look like in my interpretation of the story.

Source~!

Comments

[Gleaming]

Figured the song was from Wicked, well played!

[SuperPinkBrony12]

Things are certainly heating up. And Cheerille seems blisfully unaware of it all.

[HauntingSpiritRisingMoon]

5634745 I have a feeling she skipped over the star swirl part so that button could not pull anything, though im not sure what "anything" im thinking of but Cherilee is so rude not allowing them to be on stage together

[survivor]

They fit the parts in the sense that they hate each other.

[Ded account]

i sycned this song with your lyrics
it work wonders
here are singers