• Member Since 29th Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen Jan 12th, 2019

D G D Davidson

D. G. D. is a science fiction writer and archaeologist. He blogs on occasion at www.deusexmagicalgirl.com.


With the advent of Cadence, the princesses have come into their full power, and they're just in time: the ponies' oldest enemy has teamed up with their newest to open Tartarus itself. While the princesses defend Equestria against endless armies of ravenous monsters, Twilight Sparkle and her friends embark on a desperate quest to find an ancient artifact that may be their only hope for salvation.

This is a crossover with G1, but should be comprehensible to anyone who hasn't seen the G1 series. Contains action violence, some intense situations, and sexual themes, but no graphic gore or sex.

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 47 )

You had me instantly sold with the poetic inscription.

Things are gonna get BIBLICAL in proportion!!!


Thank you! I should probably mention that the inscription is not my own; I pulled it from Dante's Inferno. Inferno and Paradise Lost references will abound!

The Princesses take on Hell itself? I'm game.

It's high time we got an adventure fic starring our favorite winged unicorns, and in the present. Shit's gonna get fucking biblical yo

I feel like I should recognize these God's and Goddesses, darn memory.

Back to reading Dante's Inferno!:yay:

Hmmm fallen gods, a mission to destroy the three princesses, and all of it tied around revenge. This is gonna be good.

this was kinda interesting waiting for next episode before i favorite

Well first of all, let me say that for a work where half of the setting was taken from pre-written stories, the other half being intuited and warped from those stories, this was fairly well written. Your description, while not entirely original, is aesthetically pleasing though not entirely accurate for the purposes of this work. I must admit the number of views that sprung up so quickly for this makes me a tad jealous as this is the sort of story that I write many a day though no one desires to read my works, but I digress.
What I don’t like it that you give these characters only common language. The characters in your story do not speak in an epic or even elevated tone, but they use short, fragmented speech that has some epic moments, but the tone is not held throughout. While you claim to borrow from Milton you do not emulate his style. Furthermore, you simply take away some of Milton as well as Dante's most glorious quotations (the inscription upon the door and Satan’s statement on rebellion) seemingly for the sole purpose of doing it. The latter case doesn’t even seem to be something Chrysalis would say out of the blue, but it’s almost like she’s heard that saying before. This doesn’t help the fact that I do not like Chrysalis’ character at all and consider her to be the most poorly designed villain in the series yet. Also you build up the aesthetics of your work in the beginning by describing the daunting impenetrability of the gates of Tartarus, but then go you and stick Chyralis right in there without a word of explanation.
I’m nitpicking here, but your choice to have Tirek drink from Lethe is non-canon. Both Milton and Dante agree that no one can receive the comforting waters of forgetfulness. Also, Tirek seems to be angry at some divine god in the sky who damned him, but you haven’t specified who or what the god is. Certainly it is not Yaweh in this world, is it? Nor is it one of the three alicorns, for they came on the seen after Tirek's downfall.
It’s also odd that you don’t even change the names of the demons of Paradise Lost, but you did change Satan to the G1 Tirek. As for Asmodeus (or Asmoday as you call him. not sure where you found that spelling) his character is amusing, but out of place for a god after centuries of torment.
As for Astaroth (your Ashtoreth. I now see you are using the Babylonian and not the Demonological spellings), your choice to use him is very interesting indeed as you could just consider him to be the male equivalent of Ishtar, but demonologically, he is the Beast himself. Thus, coming to the end, I proclaim this to be an interesting start, but you chose some odd ways of moving the story along.


Thank you for reading and for the thoughtful critique. You're correct in that you caught me misspelling Astaroth as Ashtoreth, probably because I was reading about ancient goddesses recently. I might fix that. Asmoday is a real variant, though I'm unsure of its origin. Sorry that you don't like his goofball character; that was deliberate, but I can understand how it could be jarring.

The use of Lethe is also deliberate; the inspiration comes from Lewis's Great Divorce, in which the damned forget all pleasures of their past lives and say they have always been in Hell. I thought something akin to that was in the Inferno, too, but I may be misremembering. At any rate, I'm paying homage but making no attempt to be slavish to either Milton or Dante; their layouts of the netherworld contradict each other anyway, and though attempting to harmonize them might be interesting, I think it would be beyond my power.

You bring up some interesting questions. The depiction of the gate is inspired by the legend of the gates built by Alexander the Great to enclose Gog and Magog in the Caucasus, combined with the legend of one of Charlemagne's knights (I think Rogero), who closed up a mouth of Hell to block a horde of harpies. I hope to make all clear and answer all the questions you've brought up as the story continues.

This is one of those different stories that I just love. Things are gonna get mythical real fast up in Equestria.



As has begun posted on Queen Chraylisis?


I've been looking for a new story to read since I've caught up on my unread favorites (Yes! I've caught up on The End of Ponies!)



You're welcome, and thank you very much for reading. I've written fan fiction before, but I'm new to this website and still slightly new to this franchise; feel free to offer any critiques.


*shrugs shoulders*

As others have said on here, you seem to be using elements of Dante's Inferno and Paradise Lost. I can't help you with things related to them, since I am rather unfamiliar with them.

I would like to see this on Equestria Daily. You may want to run it through Ponychan's Training Grounds website first, though. They can work wonders, even on the most perfect of fics!


Ah, I was unaware of the Ponychan Training Grounds site. I'll do that. Thanks.

Hellspawn? you call those thing hellsapwn? THESE are REAL hell spawn!:
threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_imp.gif threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_pinky.gif threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_caco2.gif threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_losts.gif
threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_hellk.gif threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_baron.gif threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_reven.gif threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_manc.gif
threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_archn.gif threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_paine.gif threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_archv.gif threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_spect.gif
threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_spid2.gif threeguysonejoystick.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/new_classic_doom_enem_cyber.gif

Infact, I'll add their COUSINS!:
realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Cybruiser.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/DeathIncarnate.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Demolisher.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Helemental.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/HellWarrior.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Hierophant.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/LordOfHeresy.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Overlord.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/PyroDemon.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Roach.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Satyr.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Shadow.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/SnakeImp.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/SuperFlyingImp.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Terminator.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Afrit.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Annihilator.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Agaures.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Arachnophyte.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Aracnorb.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/ArchonOfHell.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/ArachnotronMK2.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Azazel.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Belphegor.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/BloodFiend.png [realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/BruiserDemon.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/Catharsi.png realm667.com/images/stories/doom/beastiary/ChaingunSpider.png


It crossed my mind to borrow demons from Doom, but then I decided that might not jive well with what I was doing.

if you want hell then try the guy's from taros in this game.:rainbowdetermined2: zohn tends to be my prefered ally tho. which side do you think the pony's would Ally with?


Not really familiar with that franchise, but my best guess would be that the ponies would try to find a way to convince the four immortal siblings to be friends again and fight against the necromancer dude.

:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:F**K YEA! AWESOME CHAPTER WITH CAP LOCK ON!


Oh, shoot! I had the cap lock on while typing that chapter! :derpyderp1:

Oh . . . oh, I see what you mean. :twilightsheepish: Thanks for reading and commenting!

586977Just incase you are still confuse sir, I meant to put a proper comment easily readible, but I couldn't hold back that Pinkie Pie self in me from unleashing the Cap button. :pinkiehappy:

This is what I meant in a more proper way.
-That was an awesome chapter that I had just read. Fuck yeah.:ajsmug:
Excuse my language:twilightblush:


Dude. This rocks.

I'm really looking forward to a showdown between Asmoday and Pinkie Pie. His whole "and cuddly!" thing cracked me up. The idea that the demonic god of lust just wants to snuggle with ponies is both really funny and potentially really disturbing.


Thank you for the kind words. Chapter 3 is underway, but going more slowly than I would have liked.

Showdown between Asmoday and Pinkie Pie, hmm? I'll add that to the list of things that need to happen.

Asmoday's goofball comments are actually imported from a conversation I was planning to write for another fan fic (still floating on the Internet somewhere) that I abandoned halfway through because every episode of the second half of the second season jossed a different part of it; eventually, I just couldn't maneuver my way out of trouble anymore and ended up with a convoluted mess. Originally, Asmoday's statements were in the mouth of a dragon. In the mouth of the demon of lust, I guess they do become kinda creepy.

Demonic ankliosauri. :twilightoops:

This story is win.

Just discovered that I accidentally introduced Ironsides as a Pegasus even though I intended him to be a Unicorn. I've fixed it now. Because this is the Internet, no one will ever know.

(I'm kind of surprised that nopony called me on that.)

And in this chapter, lots of doors get knocked on and lots of disgusting stuff goes in characters' mouths. I went ahead and upped the rating to "teen"; I'm not one for being gratuitous, but I figure some of the content here is gross enough.

Sorry for the slow update on this one; real life got in the way, and I like to give something polished.

All criticism is welcome.

EDIT: Well, sort of polished. I keep finding mistakes.

You should take this to TTG on Ponychan.

Not that I'm saying that your fic is bad. Far from it! However, they can polish out the tiniest of kinks in this.

After that, you should submit this to EQD.


Thanks. I figured TTG should be my next move.

Also willing to bet Luna is the weak link of the imminent badass warrior princess trio, with all the baggage she has. Never make deals with the denizens of Hell. It is never a good idea. That shit stays.

623650actually i'd assume the first one to fall would be celestia because she has no protective wards or shieldings against tatarous and the deamons there nor has she a perfect heart sooo... she's quite vulnerable. not to mention she's verry trusting so she could eb tricked by the canterlot guard(changelings) and captured in combat. i wonder what the authors plans for the main six are?

Wow, man. This is absolutely fantastic. Your writing style really blows me away; that bit with Asmoday had some seriously great imagery. The descriptions of the Chrysallis and the Changelings also remind me a lot of the Vord from Jim Butcher's Codex Alera series, which is one of the highest compliments I can give; those are some of my favorite books of all time.

On the one hand, I think you need to write your own novel and get it published. You've got more than enough talent. On the other hand, you also need to finish this story, 'cause dude, it is phenomenally good.


Thanks. You're very kind. Wish I could get more hits on it, but I think the title or the description is making people shy away.

I'm on the second draft of a novel now, and I really should be devoting more time to turning it into a final draft. It also by coincidence features mecha, demons from hell, and excessive action sequences, though I'm not borrowing from it for this fanfic.

I will have to read Codex Alera. Since this is fan fiction, I don't mind admitting what I'm rip . . . er, I mean, borrowing from: my depiction of Chrysalis is a blend of the Borg queen from First Contact and a race of really cool, creepy aliens from Octavia Butler's "Bloodchild"; at least, that latter is where I got the idea of eggs full of hallucinogens. Otherwise, I just ran with the idea of Chrysalis and her changelings being like an insect hive, so I made her a hive queen crossed with a black widow.

Funny, when I first saw the changelings, I compared to the Zerg from Starcraft; the general concept of the changelings, seem to crop up in a lot of fiction; heck, the Vord from Codex Alera are a clear homage to the Zerg as well; I'm sure rhy're are a lot of hive-minded races, who parasitically feed off other races, like the Starro from DC comics.

Anyway, I've been a huge fan of your blog for years, but I've been away from for quite some time; I was pleasantly suprised when I went back on a few days ago and found nothing but ponies on there! :pinkiehappy:

Anyway, I don't understnd why your story doesn't have way more views/hits than it does; it's about three frickin' pony goddesses going up against the legions of Hell! What could be more awesome than that?! Love this story so far and can't wait for more.

I know this story is inspired by Dante and Milton, but since the show has lots of references to Greek mythology (and various others),will we see any monsters from that tradition showing up later on, like, say, Typhon or Echidna?


What? I have fans?

Oh, I can throw all kinds of mishmash in here. I hope it's not obvious yet where I'm planning to take things, but there's plenty room for more monsters.

I don't care that the last comment was 2 weeks ago, but 3 scenarios are going through my mind:

1.Inky finds plans for a BFG9000, them mass produces them and kill ALL the demons with em!

2.Doomguy pops in at last minuite and conducts a "bullet ballet" with his chaingun and any sort of weapon he can fire at the time.

3.Doom demons (including the ones from realm 667) end up monster infighting all the demons.dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Rainbow_Dash_lolface.png

sadly, I don't think any of em will happen

(Yes, I am a freaking fan of DooM.)


There is more Princess Trinity coming, but I, alas, have more pressing projects at the moment.

Let me try to add some commentry!

The story itself seems to have a very nice premise and a good start so far.
The characters (especially the evil ones) seem to have a lot of potential and are probably decently fleshed out with strenghts and weaknesses. I realy liked your portrayal of Asmoday being aware of his little problem (blabbermouth) and trying a lot to keep it down with any means necessary while also having the brains to search. I also think he might have the best strategy for the long run, remove the supports of the structure to make it come crashing down. Find out what the princesses hold dear and corrupt it and make them face it and having to kill it, because when there is nothing left to fight for, why fight at all?

Cadance would have a big weakpoint in being a foalsitter: She loves foals and she knows quite a few personally, also she wants to be mortal. Lot´s of angles of attack.
Celestia is probably easier to get threw her family and loved ones rather than threw 'trust', paranoia is actually something that the bad guys would want to keep out of their enemies for a longer time to make infiltration easier and make their hits hurt more.
Luna. Many options, of course one of the mean ones might be if a simple change or addition to the names she has written on herself might be enough to break/weaken the barrier. (though I might be wrong with the information given so far). Why is it mean? You don´t need to chop of the leg, gives you more things you can do with it. Then of course she pretty much might either have a far more fragile or stronger psychology depending on how the author wants to depict her :)

The bad guys (and gal) are also an interesting house of cards. For one there are those that will be needed and those that will only cause trouble and by the looks of it the only mastermind is chrysalis, on the other hand having at least tirek there should also help because it is easy to imagine the changeling queen being overly cautious and more for plotting and sheming. As such the question is how to get rid of the unwanted assets without weakening your own side and to blow your options away (they already completely lost any kind of surprise with the failed infiltrations).

Of course there are also the mane six, but I think Twilight can be taken out easily. Give her the neverendingchecklist, of DOOM! ;)
Applejack is vulnerable threw her family.
Rarity is vulnerable threw her generosity and love for shiny objects ;)
Rainbow Dash has enough weaknesses shown in the show.
The real Problems might be Pinkie and Fluttershy, probably send the first to sugarland and the second could get accidently bitten by her snake :pinkiegasp:

This is at least a rough overview of what I thought about, there is more but I am not that good in bringing my thoughts on "paper".


625714 I agree. Luna already knows several tricks the demons have available, and she's able to use her dark knowledge to help her new, sane life. And Cadance embodies the thing the demons hate and fear. Celestia has no such protection, she can't be in great condition after 1000 years of stress, and seeing all others around her die while the only immortals she knew have tried to kill her, having that knowledge for 1000 years, won't help any. Also, Corona.

1185762 indeed nice run down of it. cheers:twilightsmile:

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