Crescendo
There was a loud 'Hiss' as Sasuke drew his sword and swung in a sudden blur of movement. It was only Kabuto's years of experience that allowed him to lean back from the blade, granting him a shallow cut to the cheek rather than a sudden lack of head. He leapt back several feet, still feeling the tingling sensation of lightning making his hair stand on end. "Well now Sasuke, this is a surprise."
"Really? Did you think I'd come willingly, after you offered up the cure so easily?" Came Sasuke's voice, distorted from the transformation.
"Honestly, we had hoped to get you across the border by then. You really should consider the offer more, we can give you so much power." Kabuto said, running a glowing palm over the cut on his face, which promptly healed.
"I'm going home." The Uchiha said, holding his blade out to the side as lightning arced erratically around him.
"I can't allow that." Kimimaro spoke up, he too holding a sword made of bone.
"That wasn't negotiable. it's taking all of my willpower not to kill everyone present. I'm going home." The lightning surged, and the hand-like wings on his back clenched in anticipation.
Kimimaro charged, darting in with precision strikes from his bone-sword. Sasuke kicked off the ground, and with a flap of the monstrous wings on his back gained altitude. A flick of his left wrist sent kunai hurling towards Kabuto, shortly followed by vicious bolts of lightning that crashed down upon the field.
Naruto and Lee both rushed Kimimaro, seeing Sasuke handling the traitorous spy. With wind-blade leading Naruto flowed into a basic attack pattern, which was easily parried by the more experienced ninja. He grimaced, noting the shallow scrapes left on the bone, where normal bones would be cleaved in two with ease. With a simple motion Naruto was disarmed, and Kimimaro poised for a lethal strike.
The blonde was spared impalement when the sound ninja leaned back, avoiding a projectile that coned the air around it and left a deep furrow in the ground for several feet when it landed. Another projectile, Lee's weights, Naruto now noticed, was launched at the bone user by way of spinning kick, this one was parried and actually managed to shatter the bone used.
Before the ninja could grow a new one the green clad chuunin was upon him. With the newly granted speed he rained blows down upon his opponent, easily slipping through the defenses of the white haired boy, and pummeling him back several feet. The assault was forced to a stop, however, when the Sound ninja suddenly sprouted spikes from his body. Leaping back to stand near Naruto, the two assessed the situation.
"He's not taking the hits like he should be." Lee commented, seeing the bones retract into the now shirtless ninja's body. "His bones are hard as steel, and he can probably move them to protect his vitals."
"He doesn't keep the spikes out all the time, so he probably can't fight well with them in the way." Naruto noted, seeing their enemy draw another sword. He paled watching the sight, some bloodlines were just too gross. "Sasuke will probably be our best bet, blunt damage and slashing damage doesn't seem to work, but he doesn't seem to have anything to defend against lightning."
With a flurry of hand seals a group of ten pegasi appeared behind Naruto. "Storm Herd formation!" he called over his shoulder, and the Ponyville weather team took to the air. Once several dozen feet up Rainbow Dash started calling out orders.
Over the field near the Land of Fire boarder, the storm of the century was brewing.
O~O~O~O~O
The chakra around Sasuke gave another surge as he swooped in close to Kabuto. The medic ninja was deceptively strong, and quite difficult to pin down with ranged attacks. Launching into taijutsu was reckless, a small part of his brain noted, but with the moon on his shoulder fully eclipsed, rational thought was taking a backseat to bloodlust.
His first few attacks were sloppy as he got used to the weight of the growths on his back, he hesitated to call them 'wings' as they seemed to be large webbed hands with deadly-looking finger nails. 'Why couldn't they be feathered. Black feathered wings would look so cool. Even if I only had one, although that would make it useless.' He inwardly moaned, wobbling slightly as he overextended.
His internal monologue was cut off when Kabuto capitalized on his unfamiliarity, striking several muscle groups with his glowing fingers. "I've damaged several of your muscle groups with my Chakra Scalpels. Using precise chakra control I can create fine blades that can cut only the specific tissue I desire, leaving the rest-"
"Shut up Kabuto." Sasuke growled, spinning on his heel and 'slapping' the shocked traitor away with one of his 'wings'. Grinning at the fact that the impromptu move actually worked, Sasuke flexed his muscles, finding them burning but still in working condition. Charging forward he again tried taijutsu, as the small portion of his mind found a wall to bang his head on, and slowly managed to adapt to the new body parts.
He lead with a right hook, letting the chakra that surged out of control flow out of his body through his fist. He connected with nothing but air, but a sudden burst of electricity forced his arm back towards him regardless. Smirking at the new discovery he cocked back another attack and let fly.
Kabuto dodged franticly, it wasn't just a matter of dodging strikes anymore, seemingly every swing the Uchiha threw released a potentially deadly bolt of energy that left the air humming and reeking of ozone.
Overhead the air rumbled as an abnormally large storm began to brew.
O~O~O~O~O
One of many Naruto clones monitored Sasuke's fight with passive interest. He had orders to dispel if anything major happened, but otherwise he was told to observe. So far Sasuke was looking like an electric eel with wings, and going to town wrecking all of the space that Kabuto didn't occupy at the time.
'Why does he get wings? I'm the one with the aerial fighting style.' The clone grumbled. In the background things were looking bleak for Lee and the original.
Lee was panting, a mean feat in and of itself, and Naruto wasn't far off. Everything they threw at Kimimaro seemed to bounce off harmlessly. Lee's more vicious combos were stopped by sudden growths of spikes. Naruto's swarms of wind enhanced weaponry were deflecting with careless swings of bone. Even swarms of clones firing air bullets from every possible angle seemed to only keep the Sound ninja relatively mobile.
On the plus side, they had forced the boy into using the first stage of his cursed seal. Although it didn't seem like a plus when the much quicker ninja grew spikes and began 'spinning' through ranks of clones at a time. It was a rampage that neither chuunin were able to slow, let alone halt.
"Perhaps I should use the gates, or the 'special pill', or both?" Lee said, glancing at Naruto.
The blonde boy cringed. He still had nightmares about what happened in that bar in Las Pegasus. Sure Lee had won that championship belt, after being knocked into a table of booze, but the collateral damage had taken a third of Naruto's winnings. Having a drunken Lee running around the battlefield would likely make the situation worse.
"No pills Lee, Gai said to only use them when you're fighting alone right?" Naruto checked, giving the green ninja an alcohol filled chocolate was like giving a child a roll of exploding tags. With a nod of agreement, Lee began the process of opening the gates.
A sudden cloud from dispelled clones appeared off to Kimimaro's left. He turned to look at it, heedless of the clones that leapt upon him with ineffective kunai and taijutsu. It drew nearer, surging towards him in a cone as the clones began to dive out of the way. He raised an arm to defend against whatever the new threat was, and was caught off guard by a bone breaking double fisted slam to his chest.
Lee chased after his foe as the ninja bounced across the ground, spiked body cutting yet another swath through the Naruto clones as they cried out in indignation. The assault continued, fists and feet slamming against spines of bone with enough force to leave slowly mending cracks.
With a growl Naruto began drawing on the Kyuubi's chakra, mentally bracing himself for the surge of negative emotions that followed. He could hear the laughter as Discord relinquished the energy, egging him on to take more and more. With a roar he crashed forward, his own clones dispelling to avoid the red tinged blur as he chased his prey across the field.
O~O~O~O~O
Kabuto flipped backwards from another surge of electricity, his skin tingled and fingers twitched in the charge of electrons that still hung in the air. He had attempted using the chakra scalpels on Sasuke once more, but each strike seemed to have diminished effect, and left his fingers twitching uncontrollably for longer and longer each time. Throwing a brace of metal scalpels from his pouch he watched as the Uchiha dodged easily, his red eyes still spinning, predicting every move.
A trio of kunai were flung in response, forcing Kabuto back even further, to his surprise the first kunai, which landed nowhere near him, was followed by a bolt of raw electricity. His eyebrows raised further when the bolt jumped from the first kunai to the second, and continued on to strike the third. He managed to tumble to the side, singing his leg as the chain of lightning passed by, and ducked a charge from Sasuke that threatened to take his head.
In a final desperate move, Kabuto threw a smoke bomb to the grass, and sunk into the ground. Sasuke responded by immediately flapping his wings, blowing the smoke away, but paused a moment when he realized his opponent was no longer there. That moment was all it took for two hands to reach up and grab his ankles, severing the tendons that allowed the boy to stand.
"You won't be walking any time soon, Sasuke. Why don't you just stop this tantrum and come with us? We'll even let your friends live." Kabuto said, moving back to a safe distance. Those wings of his had a bad habit of interrupting him.
"Don't..." Sasuke growled, rolling over on to his front. "Tell..." He pushed himself up onto his hands and knees. "Me..." The wings on his back tensed, and gave a mighty flap. "What... to... DO!" He roared as he shot into the air, flapping slowly and hovering about ten feet up, legs hanging uselessly below him. The chakra that had been slowly ebbing away rose up once more around him, and the sky boomed in response.
The tense moment between the two opponents was broken when Kabuto was once again forced to lean back, a very battered Kimimaro flew past him, pursued by a green blur. As he turned to look where they had come from he was shocked to see a ninja, cloaked in a fine red haze, meters away from him, spinning blue ball of doom in hand. "Rasengan!" The traitor took the hit dead center, and was flung back even farther than Kimimaro, and landed in a heap.
"Naruto! That was mine!" Sasuke yelled, looking even more angry.
"I was aiming for the other guy, it was an attack of opportunity!" Naruto yelled defensively. "Besides, we need your help with the other guy, he's-"
A loud cracking sound preceded Lee flying past both ninja's vision, unmoving and hopefully unconscious. As both remaining Konoha ninja looked over, they witnessed a truly horrifying sight. The bone wielder had advanced to the second stage of his cursed seal, and now had a demonic appearance. His skin had turned red, six thick spines grew from his back, and a barbed tail thumped the ground, carving thick gashes in the dirt. On his hands were large claws made of bone, gleaming deadly sharp in the sunlight.
Kimimaro hunched forward onto all fours, and in a flash was upon Sasuke, who struggled to remain airborne under the sudden increase of weight. Naruto made several cones to carry Lee away, as Sasuke surged with lightning, getting s scream form the demon of bone as he leapt to the ground. Naruto's attempt to blind-side him was met with a casual flick of a tail, which sent him careening through the air several feet. The large gashes it left on the blonde's chest healed within moments.
Undeterred, Naruto bounced back to his feet and charged again, direct thrusting attacks meeting steel-like bone as bolts of lightning rained down from above. Again and again he was knocked away, only to rise once more as Kimimaro continued to change into a monster before their eyes. Plates of bone began to form across his body, bladed armor to protect his vital organs. Barbs of bone shot from his back towards Sasuke, trying to bring the airborne foe down to the ground. His tail took on a scythe-like quality, and began attempting to sever Naruto's neck from his shoulders with every swipe.
Naruto pushed himself further, drawing enough of the Kyuubi's chakra that it coalesced around him, and began to form a fox-shaped cloak. Throwing a large amount of his newfound power into another charged Shuriken, this one tore through the air and cleaved through the bladed end of their enemy's tail. Kimimaro roared with pain, his tail now a solid foot shorter at the end, and before he could react he was set upon by a very angry Naruto.
The physical blows, even enhanced by the Kyuubi's potent chakra were still not enough to do more than daze the berserk Sound ninja. Eventually, gritting his teeth in pain from the contact, Kimimaro grabbed both of Naruto's arms. Caught in a deadlock, Naruto could only watch in horror as Kimimaro's teeth lengthened into dagger-like fangs, and a new blade grew from the stump of his tail.
A surge of lightning shot from above, shocking both ninja painfully, but loosening the Sound ninja's grip on Sasuke's teammate. Naruto drew back and struck with a clawed open palm, the cloak responded in kind, and an arm of pure chakra swept the bone user away like a piece of driftwood caught in a wave.
Catching himself with clawed hands, the ninja, now more monster than man, slammed his arms into the dirt. From the earth all around him, large spines of bone began to grow, forcing Sasuke to fly up into the clouds, and Naruto to frantically dodge. The spines continued to sprout from the earth, shooting up into jagged, deadly trees of bone in like some kind of mockery of the wood release. Naruto ran as razor sharp branches reached out to catch him, his instincts dropping him to all fours as the cloak of chakra swirled around him.
Suddenly the growth around him stopped, and Kimimaro removed his hands from the dirt. He darted into the bone-yard, the apex predator of his own overgrown jungle. It was time to hunt.
Naruto jumped as his instincts screamed at him, right over a wicked claw attached to the Sound ninja's outstretched arm. The momentum carried the monstrous boy forward, and he caught the trunk of a nearby bone tree, and continued the attack. Naruto continued to dodge, leaping from the ground to branches, even as they tore into him and were healed by the Kyuubi's influence. They exchanged few blows, each looking for a way to end the fight with a single hit, circling each other warily.
Finally tiring of the chase Naruto forced himself to a stop, turning to face the oncoming sound ninja. Within moments a swirling ball of chakra, contained within a wicked claw of the red chakra, formed in his right hand. He swung, and Kimimaro dug his claws and tail into the ground to halt his forward momentum. By a matter of inches he managed to avoid the strike and leap back to a safe distance, watching with satisfaction as the deadly-looking claw of energy was driven into the ground.
The sound ninja's left arm swelled, the claws breaking off as bone poured from within, spines lengthening and twisting into a mighty drill that from fingertips to shoulder. He crouched, preparing to use all of his speed to run the blonde boy through with a single attack. To his surprise the boy hadn't moved since his last attack, his arm still resting palm down upon the ground beneath him. There was a small rumble as the dirt beneath Kimimaro's feet cracked.
With a roar that filled his ears a massive clawed hand of chakra erupted from the ground like a geyser, the ball of energy in its palm drilling into Kimimaro's chest with enough force to send him airborne. Higher he flew, above the tops of the bone trees as the whine of the Rasengan drilling at his bone armor blocked out all sound. He grit his teeth, pouring more and more chakra into repairing and reinforcing the armor, his life depended on it.
So focused was he on this task he spared no glance upwards. Within the storm cloud Sasuke Uchiha hovered, feeling the charged air around him as he drew in the natural electricity. He bit back a scream at the strain, as the entire storm lashed out at his body with every scrap of energy the pitch black clouds could produce, and instead focused on redirecting it. Again and again the storm boomed, striking the ninja with whips of electrons, which Sasuke caught and held onto like live wires, and bent them to his will. Below he could see his target, lifted airborne by Naruto's attack. Knowing there would likely be no other opportunity, Sasuke dove.
It was like witnessing a thunderbird, as the winged Ninja emerged from the center of the storm. Electricity crackled around him so rapidly that he appeared to be made of solid light, the air around him was so heated by his very presence that he dove with a continuous thunderclap, as the rush of hot air expanded the space around him. In almost no time at all he closed the gap to the suspended Sound ninja, as Naruto fled for the hills far below.
Kimimaro watched in slow motion as the last loyal Uchiha reached out to his chest, where the bone was still knitting together from Naruto's last attack. The air around him hummed like a deafening chorus, as every scrap of energy around the flying chuunin desperately strained for release. His labored breath took in nothing but ozone from the air around him. With an agonizing slowness he watched as Sasuke mouthed the words "Fist of the Heavens" over the noise, and gently touched his chest. The entire force of the storm crashed through him and devastated the forest of bone below.
Sasuke landed in a heap moments later, at the center of a fifteen meter wide charred crater in the middle of the new forest of bone. His wings disappeared as his seal forced itself closed, his chakra too exhausted to continue. Still unable to walk he knelt on the baked earth as Naruto stumbled over, also on his very last legs. Above the two of them the storm finally broke, and a torrential downpour of rain fell down upon them, causing the ground to steam.
The two sat in silence, feeling the rain cool them down, for only a minute, before Naruto began to laugh. It barely carried over the noise of the rain, but soon enough Sasuke was laughing along with him. It had worked, their crazy, suicidal, ill-thought out plan had worked. Sasuke was cured and stronger than ever, and they had stopped the Sound ninja before they left the boarder.
The laughter stopped when they heard another noise over the sound of the rain. A soft clapping echoed out through the macabre trees that surrounded them, and Orochimaru himself emerged from the darkness. "Well done Sasuke, you truly are the only one worthy of becoming my new body. I had hoped you'd come willingly, of course, but I sent some of my best ninja just to be safe. I suppose the saying goes, 'if you want something done right, do it yourself.'" He grinned maliciously.
"My sentiments exactly." Came a booming woman's voice over the rain. Tsunade, wearing her Hokage's hat, and Jiraiya both leapt into the clearing behind Sasuke and Naruto. "Orochimaru, this has gone on long enough. As your former teammates we should have put you down long ago."
"We're fixing that mistake here and now. Former teammate or not, you aren't leaving here alive." Jiraiya added.
The three stared each other down in silence, the torrential rain slowly pooling at the center of the crater, where Sasuke and Naruto were, admittedly, scared out of their wits. A single flash of lightning lit up the clearing, and Rainbow Dash swept down from above to grab the two Chuunin. The Sanin leapt into action.
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Nice Final Fantasy 7 reference.
its a sad, sad day when I enjoy fanfics more than the original work years after I stopped being a mega-fan of Naruto.
The premise sounds interesting (if overused for a variety of fanfic crossovers in the Naruto world) and it will go into my Read Later archive.
Which I will read...eventually. Likely as soon as I finish some of the shorter stories in the 30 or so I have in line plus updates.
Will post an actual review then. Otherwise; Stay Gold! :D
well this will be fun
YES!!!!!!!!!!!
I liekz this crossover
FireFlash approves!
(my catch phrase here) idk wat it will be yet
Oooo, interesting. And I'm glad to see you didn't have him become a traitor. I actually like this Sasuke.
I really wish I could like things more than once...
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Come on boss of summons fight...3 vs 1 but still can be good. Let's do this. When can we execpt a next chapter?
Hm, There goes half of Shippuuden from what I understand. (Sasuke not going rogue)
645258 Honestly I'm not too bothered by it. Besides this way Sasuke isn't a whiney prick. =3
Congrats on returning to the featured box, this time in the "Good fics" slots instead of the "popular new fics" slots.
645378
I'll be honest, I saw VERY little Shippuuden. But Sasuke having emotions other than the emotion that is emo is great.
YAY YOU UPDATED
HOOOOOOOOO RAAAAAH
645435
...If this was in there, it wasn't for very long, it's already been kicked out.
Also, the reason Sasuke is such a flat emo wangst character is because that character archetype is absurdly popular in Japan. Like, seriously, you have no idea. You know that game Shadow the Hedgehog? It was made as a direct response to Shadow winning a Japanese character popularity poll by a landslide.
Oh god... Chaos is about to be unbound.
645500
I know of it, because I'm a die-hard Sonic fan. My Username is a reference to the Archie Comics for petes sake.
645578
(That was a rhetorical question.)
Incredible battle ended, awesome battle to begin!
I expected to hate this story after I finished the first chapter.
Or maybe the second, I'm not really certain which.
It was the point at which I realized this fic was an 'idealized world' crossover. Normally such fics wreck a perfectly good continuity, have no plot or conflict and generally just annoy me.
You, my fine author, did not break my expectations. You shattered them. The story you have written challenges the original continuity in terms of cleverness and character depth and yet you still find a way to stay true to the overall plot. As one author to another I tip my hat to you and as a reader I eagerly await further chapters. Well done.
holy shit!
that was epic! 
645596
(And I gave a rhetorical answer)
This chapter, is so good
they won :D
yay they won
and now they have to fight Orochimaru :D haheheahehhahehaehea
OH MAN this is going to be EPIC. Will this be the end of Orochimaru? On another note meant to let you know a while back i love how you stopped Shukaku, will we be seeing that monument again or at least mentions of it?
645224
4 on 1, bro. Orochimaru's snake boss vs Tsunade's Slug boss, Gamabunta, Celestia, and Luna
Now, would Naruto summon Celestia and Luna to help in this fight?
Cescendo? Perhaps you meant Crescendo?
645258 You reach the crossroads, the place where the world splits. It is now that all the differences in the foundation truly take root and alter the structure atop.
This is where the fun really begins.
An epic match.
A little disappointed in Kabuto, although to be fair he is a melee specialist fighting someone you cannot get close to. Nice to see someone other than Lee in that situation.
Strange that Sasuke didn’t try making a chakra shield like the one he copied from Naruto in the forest. Guess that’s the berserk seal at work.
So, the big three. All at full power with no reason to hold back.
Well, other than the reinforcements that the Hokage will undoubtedly have brought along. No kill like overkill and all that.
Non-traitor Sasuke? Crowning Moment of Heartwarming and Crowning Moment of Awesome all at once, yet there goes half of Shippuden as I know it. VERY interested in seeing where you take this from here on.
Oh right, and when them guys were fighting Kimimaro, where the heck was Gaara???
*squee* X 1000 I cannot put into words how much I love this story!!! You have "The Magics"
.
Do continue.
646531
Gaara was busy constructing his very own Fortress of Sand... which may or may not have flight capabilities.
646587 Sand Heli-Carrier - now THAT, I wanna see.
Dear Celestia, I can NOT wait for the next chapter!
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I started reading this story with very mild expectations. While I enjoyed Naruto for a while, the canon story has delved so far into a morass of broken bloodlines and truly annoying characters, I gave up on it. However, you've done a yeoman's job of recreating the entire story from the ground up, and with a very deft touch at extrapolating changes in events and personalities, all based on the simple concept of Naruto becoming a brony early enough to offset everything that Konoha could throw at him. You've just short-circuited better than half of the Shippuden story arcs, and all because Naruto is weird, even for a pony. Looking forward to the next chapter, it looks like the awesome fight is over, now it's time for the epic battle to commence. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Rainbow_dealwithit.png
so what are we on now, like episode 130? and hes done... what, about 6 chapters that are not related to the canon story line at all. So you my good sir have covered about 130 episodes in about 26 chapters... plus you canceled out most of shippuuden right now... love it how you can advance without losing depth or plot line at all.
646276 Naruto has bypassed his limits with the fox, so i doubt even with the its chakra Naruto can summon them, because that would either make him lose his willpower and possibly mind, or he goes into a temp. coma if he succeeds.
Oh, very nice chapter!
Are you exploring Sage nature of the cursed seal (which amplifies user's chakra with senjutsu) and Sasuke's familiarity with the way pegasi work to provide him with lightning based attacks? If so - good for you. Also, why do I see Sasuke undergoing Sage training alongside Naruto, especially given that now Jiraya was able to observe the second stage in action (he never saw it in canon, as far as I can tell), and should realize what it is from the feelings he got. Becoming a sage may be one way to "purify" the seal, and may make it actually a very good thing, as it allows for gathering of sage chakra while in motion. Or will Jiraya offer Sasuke Toad summoning, since he is a good friend of Naruto and Naruto already has another summoning conract (though, personally, I would love to see Sasuke with Griffyn summoning contract. However, all of Equestria may be connected to Naruto's one...).
Does the second stage screw with Sasuke's mind after the initial rage of activation? I don't think it did in canon, and, moreover, while Orochimaru hidin it, he didn't seem to have much control over it (and, again, purification of the seal could happen).
Several dozen feet is entirely insufficient of a height for clouds for them to be unreachable by ninja jumping.
Why didn't Naruto spam a cloud and took Sasuke with him back to Konoha in unreachable heights, instead of fighting? Other than Sasuke' berserk mode, which he seemed to control fairly well. The objective was to take Sasuke back, not fight. With the help of several pegasi they should have being able to get high enough fast enough that nothing could have prevented them from going back home.
Oh, and what happened to Kabuto? Is he recovering? And to Lee. After all, after the creation of the boneyard, they could have been impaled, if they weren't very lucky or already mobile.
And the great Sannin showdown is about to begin. Nice! Naruto is exhausted, so he can't summon princesses, but... Can' they summon themselves? Dash is there, as well as the pegasi team. Dispell one of them and have them carry the message - need reinforcements!
So I just spend all day reading chapter 1 to 31 and I have to say this may be one of the greatest crossover fics I have read ever. Gary-Stuish Naruto aside, I don't really care about that much honestly. No chapter is longer then it needs to be, a feat I've only seen a few times. Each character is written amazingly well, you made me actually LIKE Sakura which is a miricle in itself. As I finished chapter 31 I went to click the "next" button only to find it missing
. Pretty much after chapter 1 I instafav'ed and set up email alerts and am waiting in anticipation for the next chapter. Keep up the amazing work.
Inb4 Luna self-summons to go snake hunting.
...This fic needed to be written. And now that it is written, all is good with the world.
Also: Pein the wannabe god vs. Celestia, Goddess of the Morn, Luna, Goddess of the Night, and maybe even Discord, God of Chaos and Change. I cannot wait for the Pein Invasion Arc.
DAMN SON, SHIT JUST GOT REAL!
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to make more
Haha.... let the fun begin...
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Was that a reference to Sephiroth i see there?
good point let's give you red bull because it gives you wings.
I know I am bad I be in the conner thinking of more memes/bad puns.