Mare in The Moon
Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, there were two regal sisters who ruled together, and created harmony for all the land. To do this, the eldest used her unicorn powers to raise the sun at dawn; the younger brought out the moon to begin the night. Thus, the two sisters maintained balance for their kingdom and their subjects, all the different types of ponies. But as time went on, the younger sister became resentful. The ponies relished and played in the day her elder sister brought forth, but shunned and slept through her beautiful night. One fateful day, the younger unicorn refused to lower the moon to make way for the dawn. The elder sister tried to reason with her, but the bitterness in the young one's heart had transformed her into a wicked mare of darkness: Nightmare Moon.
She vowed that she would shroud the land in eternal night. Reluctantly, the elder sister harnessed the most powerful magic known to ponydom: the Elements of Harmony. Using the magic of the Elements of Harmony, she defeated her younger sister, and banished her permanently in the moon. The elder sister took on responsibility...
“…For both sun and moon” The yellow unicorn finished reading out loud “...and harmony has been maintained in Equestria for generations since. Hmm... Elements of Harmony. I know I've heard of those before... but where? Great, now I have more homework to do.”
Sunset Shimmer stood up and put the book she was reading back in her saddle bag, and started to trot back to her study room. She would have made it there but she was stopped by Twinkle Shine.
“Hey , Sunset, We’ve been looking everywhere for you.” The fellow unicorn said
The fiery haired pony replied “I bet you have, and Let me guess, you want me to go to some birthday party or some such nonsense, Right?”
Twinkle Shine lowered her head and gave a meek, “Yes”.
“Figures, look we’ve been over this, I’m the princess’s personal student and that means I just don’t have the time to mingle. Thanks, but no thanks”
Sunset trotted off to her room while one of Twinkle shine’s friends said “She has such an ego, just because she’s the princess’s student”
Sunset got to her massive library and called out to her assistant.
“Spike! Where are you?”
A Small Dragon came out wrapped in ribbon.
“I’m here!” The purple reptile said as he tripped on his own ribbon
“Spike, what is that?” Sunset asked
“Present for Moon Dancer” Spike replied
“Why do you always get invited to those things?”
“I have a life outside of you.”
Sunset lowered her eyelids at that
“Sure you do, Look just get me Predictions and Prophecies”
Spike saluted and then did what he was told, he put the book in front of Sunset.
“Let’s see… Elements of Harmony …. There we go! ‘See: Mare in the Moon’?” Sunset scoffed
“Of course, lead me to a fairy tale”
Sunset turned the page and started reading, “The Mare in the Moon: myth from olden pony times. A powerful pony who wanted to rule Equestria, defeated by the Elements of Harmony and imprisoned in the moon. Legend has it that on the longest day of the thousandth year, the stars will aid in her escape and she will bring about nighttime eternal.” Sunset sighed “Spike, take a note.”
Spike produced a pen and parchment, “Okay, why?”
“Trust me on this,” Sunset then started to dictate the letter, “Dear Princess Celestia, in my continuing studies as your personal student, I have come across something that may ruin the Summer Sun Festival. I have reason to believe that Nightmare moon is returning to bring Night Eternal, I trust you know what to do, signed Sunset Shimmer,”
Spike set the letter on fire, the green smoke flowing through an open window.
“You know, she’s not going to answer, right?”, Spike stated
“If it’s me, she’ll answer.”
No sooner had Sunset said that, Spike belched out a letter with the royal seal.
“Told you” Sunset gloated.
Spike opened the letter and read.
“My Dear Sunset, You know how I value all of your Insights”
Sunset stood straight, “Darn right you do!”
Spike continued to read, “But you have to stop reading those dusty old books,”
Sunset’s eyes widened, “What?”
Spike continued on from there, “My dear Sunset, there is more to a young pony's life than studying, so I'm sending you to supervise the preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration in this year's location: Ponyville. And, I have an even more essential task for you to complete: make some friends!”
“That Old Nag!” Sunset shouted, now en route to Ponyville in a chariot, “I warn her of impending doom, and she sends me on a play date!”
“Oh no, You have to make friends, such torture.” Spike snarked from beside her.
“Don’t sass me, Spike”
The chariot touched down as the conversation continued.
“Come on, Sunset, you’re organizing the Festival, You’re staying in a library, can’t you at least try to make some friends?”
By coincidence, the two came a across a pink earth pony with a curly mane, Sunset looked to Spike.
“You want me to make friends, watch this” Sunset looked to the pink pony and Introduced herself, “Hello, My name is Sunset Shimmer–,”
Suddenly, the pink pony gasped loudly and dashed away.
Sunset looked on in udder confusion, “Why yes, That was an intelligent conversation,”
“Pretty sure, that’s not how normal ponies act” Spike replied.
The two looked at each other and silently decided to get to work. Spike pulled out the check list for the Summer Sun Festival.
“So, first on the list is food, over at Sweet apple acres”
And so they trekked off to the farm,
Sunset ranting the whole way.
“You know what? I don’t care! Let the world go to Tartarus in a handbasket, and when I’m right Sunbutt will come crawling back to me and be like ‘I’m sorry I didn’t take you seriously’ and I’ll be like ‘Sorry won’t bring the sun back, princess!’” Sunset concluded her rant.
“You done?” Spike asked from atop of Sunset’s back “Because we’re almost there,”
“Actually, it felt pretty good to vent like that, I guess this won’t be complete disaster” Sunset said, entering the farm.
No sooner when she entered the farm, her hoof was grabbed by an orange earth mare wearing a stetson and was shaking said hoof violently. If that wasn’t enough, the whole place reeked of apples causing Sunset’s nose to stuff up a little.
“Well howdy there, stranger! Welcome to Sweet Apple Acres, name’s Applejack, what can do for ya?” The blonde mare introduced her self.
“Well so much for not being tortured” Sunset thought to herself, before saying aloud, “My name is Sunset Shimmer and I am the Organizer for the Summer Sun Festival.”
“Oh you’re here to check up on the food, right?”
“Yes, and jud–”
Sunset was interrupted by the sound of a triangle ringing and the entire Apple Family bum rushing the table. Applejack being a good host to a fault introduced Sunset to the Apple clan, one by one.
“... Big Macintosh, Apple Bloom, and Granny Smith. Up and –” AJ started to finish but was interrupted by Sunset.
“Go back two,”
“Uhh… Big Macintosh?”
“Yeah, That’s the one.”
Now, Sunset never thought her type to be a farm pony, but standing before her was the pinnacle of stallion perfection. His dirty blonde mane was just messing enough to be attractive, and each rippling muscle beneath his red fur was as delicious as the apple he was named for. There was even something about the way he wore his harness, something that pleased Sunset to no end.
“Uhh… Sunset?” Applejack started as she waved a hoof in from of the mesmerized mare’s muzzle, “Did you wanna sample some of our treats?”
“What do you think I’m doing?” Sunset replied before relizing who she had said that to.
“Say what now?”
“What! I mean, yes, I’d love to try some your food.”
Originally, Sunset was just going to have one treat, but at the behest of The Apples, she had one of every type of treat. Now filled with an unhealthy amount of apples, She and Spike trudged through Ponyville. Spike checked food off the list.
“Okay, so next is Weather,” Spike stated.
“Oh, Please be normal,” Sunset begged
“The pony in charge is a pegasus named Rainbow Dash”
“Well at least–”
Sunset was interrupted by a blue blur tackling her to into the nearby creek, water logging her mane and fur.
“Heh, sorry about that,” a light scratchy voice apologized.
“Oh no problem, I was actually getting heat stroke” Sunset spat venomously.
Sunset parted her mane to see a blue pegasus perching on a bridge. The pegasus was laughing to to herself.
“ Come on, be a sport, it’s only some water.”
Sunset climbed out of the creek, “Let me guess, you’re Rainbow Dash,”
“The one and only! And you are?”
“Sunset Shimmer, Why did you knock me into a creek,”
“Oh, Right, Let me get that,” Rainbow then created a whirlwind around Sunset, wicking away all of the moisture from her fur and mane. Unfortunately, her mane was ‘styled’ into the ever popular bird nest style.
“And that’s what I call the Rain-Blow dry!” Rainbow stated proudly before looking at her handy work. She tried to stifle her laughter.
“I swear, if you laugh, I will set you on fire….”
Ultimately, Rainbows attempts at being polite failed and she was rolling on the floor laughing. Sunset lowered her eyelids and she sighed.
“Whatever, are you going to at least clear up the clouds?”
“Oh yeah, I’ll get to that when I’m done practicing”
“For…. You know what? I don’t care, I know where your priorities are”
Rainbow got up in Sunsets face, “Is that a challenge?”
“Wh- No! It’s not a challenge–”
“You think I’ll ruin The Summer Sun Festival for Ponyville!”
“I don’t give two horseapples about Ponyville!”
“Watch this!” Rainbow then flew up into the air and pummeled every cloud she could find, and then returned to Sunset Shimmer with a smug look on her face.
“Ten seconds flat,” Rainbow boasted. “I’d never leave ponyville hanging”
“Your parents must be so Proud.” Sunset turned to Spike , “ What’s next?”
“ Decorations.” Spike read.
Both Sunset and Spike went around looking at the decorations and found the Decorations Coordinator, a white unicorn named Rarity.
If one asked Spike about Rarity, he’d tell you that she was the most beautiful thing he’s ever gazed upon. Her perfectly coiffed mane going ever so gracefully with her snow white coat. She herself was the height of grace, currently fastening a bow to the stage.
If you asked Sunset what she was feeling right then, she would tell you that she was the tiniest bit relieved. Yeah, Nightmare Moon was going to be arriving in a few hours to bring eternal night, but right here, right now, Sunset might’ve finally found some sanity in a village full of idiots. Nopony who could decorate Town hall like this could be insane.
“This looks so good! For once this job is easy!” Sunset gushed.
“Why thank you da–aaaaaagggggggggghhhh” Rarity started and then saw Sunsets Mane, “Oh you poor dear, what happened to your coiffure?”
“My Mane? Short answer, rainbow pony” Sunset replied
“Ah, say no more, I know how much of a ruffian Rainbow Dash can be, oh, I hope she hasn’t ruined your impression of Ponyville,”
“I wouldn’t say she’s solely responsible”
“Well come with me, I’ll show you that despite our humble atmosphere, we can actually be the pinnacle of class.”
For once today, Sunset felt happy. Rarity was making great, polite, conversation while leading Sunset to her boutique. Sunset was sure that when Nightmare Moon came, She’d find a special place for rarity as the moon queen’s tailor. That was of course,if all else failed.
Then they went into the boutique, and Sunset was immediately proven wrong. As soon as they entered, Rarity went to work putting various saddles on to her.
“Oh, Look at me rambling on,” Rarity said, as if Sunset could notice, “What about you, dear, where are you from?”
“Well I was sent from Canterlot–”, Sunset was then interrupted.
“Canterlot?! Oh, I am so envious! The glamor, the sophistication! I have always dreamed of living there! I can't wait to hear all about it! We are gonna be the best of friends, you and I,” Rarity went on before noticing the Saddle she was putting on to her victim, “ Emeralds? What was I thinking, Some sapphires would compliment you nicely,”
As Rarity left, Sunset pulled off the saddle grabbed Spike by the tail and ran out of there.
“Wasn’t she amazing?” Spike commented dreamily once they were outside.
“Yeah, she’s a real piece of work, please tell me we’re done.”
“Uh, actually one last thing, music”
And they did come across the music coordinator, a light yellow pegasus by the name of Fluttershy, who was conducting a group of birds.
Sunset walked up and called out, “Excuse Me!”
The birds flew off and Fluttershy hid behind her hair.
Sunset froze for a while, “ Um… right. My name is Sunset Shimmer and I’m the organizer for the Summer Sun Festival and I’m here to check on the music.”
The two ponies stood awkwardly for a few seconds.
“Will the birds come back?”
The pegasus nodded her head slightly.
Sunset still stood silent for a beat, “ Well, this conversation has been riveting, Come on, Spike”
Fluttershy then noticed Spike.
“A Baby Dragon!” She practically squeed, “I’ve never seen a Baby Dragon before!”
“Glad to see somepony appreciates me” Spike all but gloated.
“I feed you, don’t I?”
Fluttershy continued to talk to Spike, “Oh my, he talks. I didn't know dragons could talk. That's just so incredibly wonderful I, I just don't even know what to say!”
“That makes two of us, honestly”, Sunset deadpanned .
“What’s his name ?”
“I’m Spike!”
“Hi Spike, What do dragons talk about?”
“What do you want to know?”
“Everything!”
“Sweet Celestia, No” Sunset cried in anguish
The Torture had started unfortunately, as Spike told Fluttershy his life story, literally. At this point, Sunset Shimmer was one hundred percent done with ponyville. Fortunately now all she had to do was go into her library, come up with a plan to stop the coming apocalypse, and prove once and for all why the princess should listen to her.
They all got to the library as Spike finished his story, “Do you want to hear about my day today?”
Fluttershy nodded, “Oh yes please”
“No!” Sunset yelled as she turned to Fluttershy “I’m sorry but this course of Spike the Dragon I has ended, feel free to register for the next class: Spike the Dragon II, Starting NEVER!”
Sunset shut the door and sighed.
“That was Rude,” Spike commented as he hopped off Sunset’s back
“Don’t start with me, Spike. Right now, I just need a bottle of cider and a few pieces of graph paper”
The lights flicked on, and Sunset found herself surrounded by ponies, all yelling “Surprise!”
At the forefront was the pink earth mare Spike and Sunset met that morning.
“Hi I’m Pinkie Pie, and I threw this party just for you! were ya surprised?”
“Yes, very, this was the icing on the cake” Sunset groaned
“There’s cake over there, next to the drinks. I made sure to bake an extra huge cake so that everypony can have some…”
Sunset just tuned Pinkie out after awhile, and looked where the drinks were. Surprisingly there was a lot of good stuff, and Sunset could swear the punch was spiked; just what the doctor ordered. There was also hot sauce, Sunset decided to put that bottle near the cupcakes just so nopony would accidentally drink a glass of that stuff. Sunset then pour herself a glass of punch. One whiff and she knew, definitely spiked, and then went to the guest room in the library.
Upon seeing sunset leave without a word, Pinkie simply said, “I guess she needed to freshen up.”
Sunset lay on the floor,various charts, graphs and other miscellany littered the floor.
Spike entered the room, “ Sunset, you really gotta join the party, Pinkie just started Spin the … What’s all this?”
Sunset looked up from her ‘homework’ and answered, “Spike, good, so I think I have a solid plan A. When Nightmare Moon makes her grand entrance, I’ll fire up an evocation spell to burn her to ashes.”
“Yeah, her and everypony else.”
Sunset tapped her hoof against her chin before concluding, “ Acceptable losses, buck this town!”
“And Celestia would be okay with that? And not do what she did last time you started using evocation magic?”
Sunset paused before mumbling, “I did make the fires better…”
The unicorn and dragon went to Town Hall where the ceremony was taking place. Spike had to take away a flag Sunset made that read ‘Welcome Nightmare Moon’, that was plan B apparently. They went into the room and found a place by Pinkie, who was raving about how excited she was, making Sunset roll her eyes.
The Ceremony started as the mayor introduced Princess Celestia. The curtains opened to nothing. Wondering if she missed her cue, the mayor introduced the princess again. Nothing still.
“Bit in the air,” Sunset commented to herself.
Just as the mayor was trying to calm everypony there down, a black star-filled smoke rose and formed a jet black alicorn wearing midnight blue armor.
“And the bit drops,”
“Oh, my beloved subjects. It’s been so long since I’ve seen your sun loving faces” The alicorn addressed the crowd condescendingly
From somewhere in the crowd, Rainbow challenged the usurper while Applejack held her back. The Starry maned stranger chuckled at this.
“Why, am I not Royal enough for you? Do you not know who I am?”
Pinkie started to open her mouth but she was interrupted by Sunset.
“Oh please!” Sunset called, “You think any pony in this backwater town even studies mythology?”
“ My don’t we have the sharp tongue, and I presume you know who I am?”
“I tried to warn everypony! I tried to say, ‘Nightmare Moon is coming, hide your foals, hide your mares’ but No, I get sent here with the biggest group of idiots in equestria!”
Nightmare Moon’s smirk grew even more sinister, “So you do know me, and you also know why I’m here,’
It was then that Sunset felt the tremendous power behind the alicorn. Realizing that even she was thinking too small.
“Remember this day,My Little Ponies, for it shall be the last, and the night… Will last… FOREVER!”
To this, Sunset only had one response, “Horseapples,”
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When's the next chapter coming?
this been december 2014?
dude you should continued more this is great!
You don't have to come and confess
We're lookin' for you
We gon' find you we gon' find you
So you can run and tell that,
Run and tell that
Run and tell that, Moonbutt
Moon, moon, Moonbutt
5680813 I'm actually in the process of writing more as we speak.
5681220
thats a good news
Biggest issue I see with the story is the grammar. There's a fair amount of missing punctuation, inaccurate capitalization (either capitalizing where there shouldn't be capitalization or lack of capitalization where there should be some) and also cases of incorrect paragraph spacing (i.e. only a single line break in some cases instead of two, and in at least one case a sudden line break midway through a sentence).
Might want to try to get an editor of some sort for it to fix up these issues.
I love Sunset's spin on the encounters! It's hilarious!
I loved this. It's not a word for word copy but with sunset in plase of twilighht. Sunsets sass is fantastic