Friendship is Magic Ad Libbed

by Powderjaggy

Philly Sitters

Author's note: My friend (who wishes to be known as Kirensia) and I have taken to roleplaying as Friendship is Magic characters on Gchat, trying to stay reasonably true to the tone of the original show and the characters' personalities (or sometimes not). There is very little planning involved in this process (and what little there is rarely comes to fruition), so all the dialogue and situations described are fully spontaneous. The stories posted here are the polished-up results of these roleplays.

---

"Fifty, fifty-one, fifty-two..." Pinkie Pie counted as she lapped up her ice cream at record speed.

Across from her, Twilight was having considerably more trouble. Lick, lick, lick...

"Pinkie," Twilight groaned, wondering how she had managed to get talked into an ice cream-eating race with Pinkie Pie of all ponies. It was true that Pinkie had agreed to eat the ice cream lick by lick instead of gulping them down two cones at once, but even then Twilight didn't think she could keep up. "Ugggghhh. Please... no more..."

"But I'm - fifty-nine - not finished - sixty - yet!" Pinkie replied in her usual cheerful tone. "Sixty-one, sixty-two, sixty-three... Did you just - sixty-four - drop yours - sixty-five - on the ground?"

Twilight looked down, her tongue still lapping uncontrollably at empty space. Realizing what had happened, she quickly returned her tongue inside her mouth.

Pinkie Pie didn't seem to care that she had won. She had really only wanted to eat ice cream; the race was just to make it extra fun.

"Hmmm," Twilight thought out loud, then smiled as an idea formed in her head. "Hey, Pinkie. How about I help you with that ice cream?" she asked.

"Okie dokie lokie!" Pinkie said, handing Twilight half of her ice cream on a cone. She then popped the remaining ice cream right into her mouth.

"No, no." Twilight shook her head. "I want to help you." Levitating the ice cream with her telekinesis, she flung the dessert into Pinkie's face.

Pinkie giggled at Twilight's prank. "Ooh!" she exclaimed in surprise, and licked off the splattered ice cream. "Sugary!"

Suddenly, Princess Celestia burst onto the scene. "Twilight Sparkle, my faithful student, and Pinkie Pie, I have some grave news," she announced.

"Oooh, ooh!" Pinkie said in anticipation, bouncing up and down.

"As you should know, Twilight," Celestia continued, "I have an important assignment for you. There is an old friend who I need your help with."

At that point, a dramatic "dun dun dun" ran through the air, courtesy of Pinkie Pie playing her musical instruments which she had pulled out of nowhere.

---

The ponies arrived in a secluded corner of the Canterlot courtyard, where a massive tree of grand proportions stood akin to the tree in Disney World's Animal Kingdom.

"Wow," Twilight breathed, astounded. "I've never seen this before."

"Ummm, girls, my other friend," Celestia said, pointing instead to the foot of the tree where a tiny little venus flytrap grew.

Pinkie checked out the tree, then the venus flytrap. The flytrap reacted by snapping shut in her face. Pinkie blinked.

"Ooh, bitey," she commented.

Twilight gasped and cowered behind her mentor in fear.

"I know, I know!" Pinkie exclaimed. "It wants a snack!" She popped a cookie crumb into the flytrap's mouth. The plant swallowed the morsel down its stem.

"Now, now," Celestia told Twilight. "Don't be shy; say hello."

"Hi there..." Twilight ventured, bending down to address the flytrap.

CHOMP. The venus flytrap clamped its jaws onto Twilight's face.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Twilight screamed, galloping back and forth in an effort to free herself. "Get it off, get it off, get it off!"

"Calm down," instructed Celestia, "or you'll pull up the..."

It was too late.

"... stem," Celestia finished, smacking her own forehead with a hoof.

Twilight looked on with wide eyes, shocked at what she had done.

The venus flytrap lay limp on the grass for a few moments, but then stirred and straightened up, reextending its roots to anchor itself to the ground. It snapped grumpily in Twilight's general direction.

"What's its name?" asked Twilight as she winced.

"Her name is Philomeena II," Celestia replied as Pinkie Pie continued to feed the flytrap cookie crumbs. "I want you two to cheer her up today."

"But, Princess," said Twilight. "Why can't you ask Fluttershy to do this?"

"I have a much bigger job for her," Celestia answered.

---

At that moment, Fluttershy was in a cave trying to tame an ursa major, some manticores, and a parasprite.

---

"Okie dokie lokie!" said Pinkie Pie as Celestia finished her description. "I love to cheer everypony up!"

"WHAT ARE YOU SO EXCITED ABOUT?" cried Twilight, grabbing Pinkie Pie. "WE HAVE TO SAVE FLUTTERSHY, NOWWW!"

"Now, now, I'm sure she'll be fine," Celestia assured her student. "Besides, plants have never been Fluttershy's forte." With Twilight's knowledge of botany and Pinkie Pie's sunny disposition, I'm sure this will be a wonderful experiment... I mean endeavor, the Princess added to herself.

Not bothered by Twilight's outburst, Pinkie Pie put her head down to the ground to check out Philomeena II. She had never cheered up a plant before. After doing a bit of thinking, she came up with an idea and ran off.

"HEY!" Twilight called. "Pinkie Pie, come back here!" As she turned, she noticed that Celestia had also left. "Sighhh." She lowered her head towards Philomeena II. "Guess it's just you and-" CHOMP!

"Not funny," Twilight muttered in a muffled voice.

---

Pinkie trotted back cheerfully with a watering can. "Plants like water, right?" she asked as she started to water Philomeena II.

"Pinkie, no," Twilight said, snatching the watering can away. "Venus flytraps don't need much water. They just need sparing amounts of it."

"Aww," Pinkie lamented, but soon brightened up again. "Maybe she'll enjoy a PARTY!" She pulled out her party cannon, showering the flytrap with confetti and balloons. "I never leave home without my party cannon!"

Twilight took out a roll of tape and wrapped the hyperactive Pinkie Pie in it. "Now..." she said, relieved to be in control of the situation at last, "how about a story, Philomeena II?"

"Yaay," said Pinkie, now mummified in tape. "This is fun."

"Once upon a time..." Twilight started.

---

"... and she lived in the nice library and had fun with all her nice books," Twilight finished, feeling nice and warm inside. "Wow, that was great, wasn't it?" She looked around, suddenly realizing that neither Pinkie nor Philomeena II were anywhere to be seen. "Guys?"

"Nice story, Twilight!" Pinkie's voice called.

Twilight looked up. Pinkie Pie was drifting overhead by hanging onto some balloons. She was still wrapped in tape.

"Pinkie, where's Philomeena II?!" Twilight demanded.

"I have no idea!" said Pinkie joyfully, not really looking. "She was listening to your story, right?" The pink pony started humming a tune. Twilight smacked herself in the forehead with a hoof.

"OWWWWCH!" Twilight suddenly yelled out in pain. Philomeena had been on her back all along.

Pinkie laughed. "She pulled a fast one on you, Twilight!"

After levitating the flytrap off her back and planting it squarely back on the ground, Twilight had reached the near limit of her patience. "I want you to stay right here, got it?" she ordered. "And no chomping!"

Philomeena II responded by slapping the unicorn with a vine.

"So that's how you wanna play huh?" Twilight fumed. "Well, FINE. Princess Celestia may be your master, but I'm not. Do what you want!" She stormed off.

"Waaait!" cried Pinkie Pie, shocked at her friend's anger. "Where are you going?" She flew after Twilight's retreating form using her balloons.

As the two ponies left, Philomeena II drooped towards the ground.

---

Upon catching up with Twilight, Pinkie jumped out of the ground.

"Pinkie Pie... I'm sorry," Twilight said dejectedly. "Here are some books to help you, but I'm no good at this," she admitted.

Pinkie picked up one of the books and skimmed a few pages. "It's okay, Twilight!" she assured her friend. "I know what to do!"

---

Pinkie returned to Philomeena II, carrying a fresh roll of duct tape. In an instant, she had wrapped the flytrap in the material.

"Isn't this so much fun, Philomeena II?" Pinkie asked, prancing around. "Twilight showed me how to do it!"

Philomeena II just drooped.

"It isn't working is it?" said Pinkie sadly.

All of a sudden, with a loud ripping noise, Philomeena II grew to several hundred times her original size, tearing free of the tape. This was her true size.

"RAAAAAAAAAAAH," she roared.

Pinkie Pie jumped back. "Should I get some more?" she inquired.

Philomeena II reached out with her vines and grabbed Pinkie, hugging her tightly.

"Whee!" exclaimed Pinkie.

... Then, swinging Pinkie as though the pony was a hammer, the flytrap brought her smashing down to the ground.

"Owww..." Pinkie shook dust off her coat as she staggered to her feet. "That's not very nice!" she objected.

The flytrap drooped again a bit, then bent down and licked Pinkie. Uprooting herself, she walked forward a few steps and extended a vine for the pony to hitch a ride on.

"RAAH?" she growled.

Pinkie jumped onto the vine with a quizzical expression, and Philomeena II promptly strode out of the courtyard in the direction of Ponyville.

---

"I can see my house from here!" Pinkie Pie said from her vantage point as the two arrived in town.

Naturally, the citizens of Ponyville were struck with fear.

"Don't be afraid everypony!" Pinkie told them. "This is my new friend Philomeena II. She lives in Canterlot with Princess Celestia!"

The other ponies stopped panicking for a moment, but then began to chuck vegetables at the giant plant.

"Do you eat vegetables?" Pinkie asked, catching a carrot as it flew towards them. She was then hit in the face by a cabbage.

Agitated by the ruckus, Philomeena II began roaring louder and destroyed several market stands as she tried to get away.

"Pinkie, what is going on here?!" Applejack asked as she returned to her smashed stand.

"Hi, Applejack!" Pinkie shouted a greeting. "Princess Celestia took Twilight and me to see this friend of hers, Philomeena II. The Princess asked us to cheer her up! Wanna help?"

Unconvinced, Applejack backed away from the flytrap's swiping vines. "Surely someone else can help you, right..?"

"But we can all have so much fun together!" said Pinkie. A group of panicked ponies ran away behind her.

"Nnnoo, that's alright, sugarcube," Applejack replied.

"Okie dokie," said Pinkie. "Let's go get some cupcakes." She pointed Philomeena II in the right direction.

---

Twilight, having returned to her study, heard the screaming and crashing outside. She looked out her window. "Huh," she mused. "Spike, fly over and check it out."

"But I can't fly, Twilight!" her assistant pointed out.

"Now you can!" Twilight responded, kicking the young dragon straight out the window. "Owloysius, go help him too."

"AAAAH!" yelled Spike has he was sent flying through the air. He crashed through a roof and became stuck.

Owloysius came flying over and grabbed Spike's tail in his talons, pulling him out of the hole. As the owl continued towards the disturbance, Spike tried to follow, only to remember that he was still on the roof. He tumbled to the ground.

---

Seeing that the chaos was being caused by Philomeena II, Twilight shouted, "Pinkie Pie, I told you to watch her!"

"I am!" replied Pinkie. "See?" She was sharing a large plate of cupcakes with the flytrap. Twilight sighed.

Spike staggered back into the library. "So what do we do now, Twilight?" he inquired.

"We'll just have to inform the Princess," said Twilight.

Spike got out his writing supplies as he usually did when Twilight needed to contact Celestia, but Twilight told him there was no need.

"No, no," said the unicorn. "I'll tell her myself."

"Tell me what?" the Princess' voice rang through the room. Celestia had suddenly teleported into the study.

"Um, nothing, Princess," Twilight started as a loud crashing noise shook the floor beneath them.

"Philomeena II is roaring on the other end of town?" Celestia guessed, though she already knew the answer.

"Who wants cake?" Pinkie interrupted as she and Philomeena II reached the library and peered in through the window.

"Hello there..." Celestia said, her eye twitching slightly. "Philomeena II, how did you end up here?"

"She came down here herself!" Pinkie answered. "I think she's happy now."

"Philomeena II, you are not to leave the courtyard," Celestia said sternly. "Did I not tell you?"

Philomeena II made a growling noise and drew back, as though in shame.

"I'm sorry, Twilight and friends." Celestia turned back to the others. "She has to return to the courtyard."

"Okie dokie," Pinkie accepted. "We had fun today anyway, right?" A house collapsed outside.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" someone screamed. Startled, everyone turned to look in the direction the scream came from and saw to their horror a few dragons along with various other monsters chasing after a terrified Fluttershy.

"I can't control them!" cried Fluttershy, flying frantically towards the library.

"ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR!" Philomeena II let loose a mighty roar as the other monsters approached. At the sight of the towering carnivorous plant, the monsters quickly retreated.

The ponies clamored over Philomeena II and thanked her for saving them.

"You really like them, don't you?" Celestia asked the flytrap. Philomeena II nodded.

"Then, I see no problem," Celestia affirmed. "Twilight Sparkle, I shall see that you watch over Ph- no, Paragon. That is your new name. Do you like it?" The flytrap nodded again.

"Does this mean we can have cake every day?" Pinkie asked, barely containing her excitement.

---

Dear Princess Celestia,

I learned that sometimes, books can't dictate a pony. It's when you forge the bond of trust and friendship, that's when we truly learn about others. Paragon took some time for me, but she's no less a friend than Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Fluttershy, or any other.

You most faithful student, Twilight Sparkle

---

Role distribution for this story
Kirensia: Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia, Paragon, Applejack, Fluttershy
Powderjaggy: Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle (opening scene), Paragon, Spike, Owloysius

Kirensia has full control over the role assignment in these roleplays, by the way, so any apparent unevenness in their distribution is his doing.

Comments

[HighTreason25]

For ad-libbing, this is a great story!

[Bolted gear5]

Great story! 4 out of 5 Yay's! Good job!