• Published 26th Dec 2014
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The Nineteenth Century: The Saga of Equestria - mint20



It is 1806. The Corps of Discovery is currently holed up in Fort Clatsop, but their presence in Griffon territory does not go unnoticed. In Equestria, the Princesses sit on their thrones, unaware that the ideas of the West may just force them off.

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The Pastry Affair, Part II

The Pastry Affair, Part II
The Nineteenth Century: The Saga of Equestria

February 28, 1839
Near México City, México

Lieutenant Quill observed the fighting. As it continued, he slowly started to observe a pattern.

About five hundred French soldiers. I’d say maybe twenty cannons. No mounted troops that I can see.

We outnumber them by about one and a half ponies to one man. We were allotted fifteen cannon. I have five hundred pegasi, two hundred earth ponies, and fifty unicorns.

If I have my pegasi attack from the sky, we can utilize the element of surprise. I bet humans have very little experience with fighting enemies in the air…

“I need three hundred pegasi to prepare for a run on the French forces!” he ordered.

“Sir?”

“Just in case,” said the Lieutenant. “We must always be ready. You never know about these humans…”

His second, First Sergeant Bronze Spear, looked at him, and nodded.

The French forces moved forward, advancing against the Mexicans. Their forces were having a rough time.

“We need to be closer to the fighting,” said Quill. “Move to the right!”

The seven hundred fifty ponies slowly shifted in the direction specified. Now, they were parked on a hill near the fighting. The Mexicans were about twenty feet below and fifty feet to their right.

“Unlimber the cannons!”

And now we wait…


Fifteen minutes later…

“Sir! The Mexicans and French have moved to hand-to-hand fighting!”

“So they’re done trading volleys? Excellent,” said Quill.

Suddenly, amid the din of the fighting, Quill heard a faint whizz, and his sergeant, who had given the report to him, choked once, then collapsed.

Yes!!! he crowed to himself, silently. He was sorry about his sergeant, of course, but finally, he had it. A pretext to attack the French.

Of course, he had no way of proving that it was a French bullet. It very well could have been a stray Mexican shell. But that did not stop him.

“They’re firing on us! Cannons, aim for their back ranks and cannon and fire when ready!”

The ponies milled about for a few minutes, but finally, the Equestrian cannons started to sing…


April 4, 1839
Canterlot, Equestria

“WHAT IN TARTARUS WERE YOU THINKING!?!?” bellowed Luna.

Quill flinched. He had heard stories of Nightmare Moon, of course, and Luna was looking really pissed. He looked around the table, looking for some salvation.

Nothing. Not even from Major Shining Armor, who sat stone-faced.

“They attacked us first!” the pegasus protested. No sell.

After you deliberately moved as close as you could to the Mexican army,” said Cadance, glaring at him. “Your officers were quite through in their reports.”

“But, I-”

“Lieutenant. Leave,” said Celestia, speaking for the first time since she called in the pegasus for the inquiry. “Wait outside until we call you back in. We must determine what consequences will be levied against you.”

Any protest Quill had to offer died in his throat. He could do not but salute sharply, turn around, and walk out the doors.

Outside the chamber, there were two ponies of the Royal Guard that watched him, to insure he did not try to run away or escape his judgment. Despite not being charged, he was, for all intents and purposes, under arrest.

And I did so well, he thought, remembering the battle.

As the Equestrian cannons started to roar, the French looked around in confusion. As they did, the Equestrian pegasi crashed into them, guns blaring. The humans wavered. They had eyed the Equestrians with suspicion at the outbreak of the battle, but their commanding officers had assured them that the Equestrians would not have the guts to intervene.

Apparently, they were wrong.

As the French rallied and brought their weapons to bear on the pegasi, they quickly found that the pegasi were scattering, no longer presenting a unified target for the humans to fire at. While the humans were still looking for an easy target in the sky, the ground-based earth ponies and unicorns closed the distance with the humans and slammed into them.

It was chaos. The French had no idea which way to turn. And their disarray bought the Mexicans time to rally and rebuild their formations. When they also struck against the French, along with a renewed attack from the pegasi, the humans quickly broke and fled the battlefield.

Quill lost twenty pegasi, thirty-five earth ponies, and five unicorns. The Mexicans lost about two hundred fifty of their four hundred fifty opening force.

The French lost almost four hundred twenty five of their five hundred men. Granted, a good number of them were killed by the Mexicans, but the Equestrians had certainly left their mark...

“Lieutenant Quill. The Princesses want you back,” said one of the guards, snapping Quill out of his thoughts.

He saluted, then walked back into the Council’s chambers. He then saluted the Princesses.

“At ease, Lieutenant,” ordered Celestia. “Sit down.”

Quill did so.

“You have been charged with unlawful and unauthorized engagement, performing unauthorized military operations, and attacking a neutral nation without cause. It is the finding of the Equestrian Royal Council that you are guilty of all charges.”

Quill felt as if he was falling.

“It is the ruling of this Council that you shall be stripped of rank and title within the Equestrian Military and confined to house arrest for a period of one year, effective immediately.

That concludes your sentence. The guard shall escort you to your home in Canterlot.”

Quill could do nothing but salute sharply and turn towards the door.

“Did we say you were dismissed, soldier?” asked Shining Armor, speaking for the first time.

“Upon the completion of your house arrest, you shall report to the First Corps, where you will take your place-” Celestia grimaced “-as the Captain of the First Corps.”

“...What?”

Celestia sighed. “Your actions were wrong. You broke the law, and you must be punished for it. ...However, your tactics were sound, and Equestria is suffering something of a shortage in the office pool. Perhaps more importantly, the Mexican government is elated at your actions, and we need to show that we support them...You are dismissed, Quill. Report for house arrest.”


Text of the French-Mexican Treaty on Claims

Article I: All hostilities between the French Kingdom and the Republic of México shall cease immediately.

Article II: The Republic of México shall pay a sum of five hundred and fifty thousand pesos to the French Kingdom within five years of this Treaty being signed.

President of México, Antonio López de Santa Anna

Special Minister to México, Jacqui du Vol

Observed by the Equestrian Ambassador to México, Silver Star

Signed April 5, 1839


April 10, 1839
Canterlot, Equestria

“But we won!”

“We got lucky,” corrected Celestia, looking at Chancellor Blueblood. “Again. We have had two engagements with the humans, and we have gotten lucky twice. In both instances, we faced them with numbers on our side, and were able to abuse our power in the skies to our advantage. We will not get lucky again. The humans are many things, but dumb is not one of them. They will learn from their mistakes. I am certain that the Americans have caught wind of our tactics, and are, as we speak, strategising and attempting to figure out how they can defeat them.

“The Battle of México City was our last easy victory,” said Celestia, in a heavy voice. “Quill both did a great service and gave us a terrible curse. On one hoof, his actions have paved the way to friendly relations with México, and possibly all of Latin America. On the other, he has exposed our tactics for the world to see and come up with counters to. It falls to us, the Royal Ministry of the Sciences, and the officers of the Equestrian Military to protect Equestria now that our tactics have been lain to bare in front of the entire world.

“Hubris from the human nations have carried us this far, but remember that we still have not engaged in a formal war with the humans. Everything up until now have been glorified skirmishes, not major engagements.”

Celestia looked around at the other members of the Council, looking gloomy. She did not blame them, as she hammered the point in one last time: “We cannot count on human hubris to save us again. Sitting on this Council is not easy, and sometimes we have to make the tough decisions. Decisions that determine whether Equestria will survive another day, or if the historians will include us simply as a footnote when they write of this time. But we can do it. This is not the first threat Equestria has faced, and it will not be the last. I believe in the power of ponykind. In the power of Harmony. We can do this.

“This meeting is adjourned until tomorrow.”