• Member Since 19th Sep, 2013
  • offline last seen January 16th

Sketch-Pad


I (facebook page!) normally do requested artwork for others, mainly drawing their OCs. I am told that I have good stories that I am told I should right down here on FimFiction, so thats why Im here!

T

This story is a sequel to The 34th Equestrian Hunger Games


Terra has managed to survive the Hunger Games along with a few of her newly found friends. But instead of being met with a welcoming home in their old districts, they are pushed strait into preparing for a war that could change the Nation for once and for all.

Chapters (5)
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Comments ( 15 )

I just gotta say, bro. Wow.

First of all, I'm glad you're continuing this. I really enjoyed the last story, and I'd be lying if I say I didn't check in every now and then just to make sure you didn't post it when I was away. I must say, also, this is gorgeous. The flow and prose are very impressive. I mean, I could see that the absence has done something for you. This was very well written, I'll admit it.

I can't wait to see what comes next. Take your time, obviously, but I still cannot wait.

Now, that the professionalism part of this comment is done and over with...

OH MY GOOOO-

-Cyneryk

Ack! How did I not notice when this was up! AAAGGH reading now!

I didn't even know that this updated!

And wow, I can definitely admit, Sketch, I can see your writing improve as times goes on. It's actually really interesting to watch. This is still very well written and whatnot. I'm honestly in love with this whole thing.

Welp! Time to delve back into the recess' of fimfiction! Keep it up, bruh!

-Cyneryk

Dangit! Should have checked back sooner. My apologies, friend.
Give me some time to read this, and we'll see whether I can be of assistance again.
Good to see that you have continued this.

Nicely done.
I've gotta say, your writing has greatly improved since the last story. It flows much better.
I particularly liked your "PTSD scene". I've never experienced it, nor known anyone who has, but I felt you handled it excellently.
There were a couple of points where I tripped over a phrase or description, but I attribute that more to the fact that I'm reading this at 5:30 in the morning than anything else.
And now a confrontation with a father who she hates. Should be interesting.

I don't usually point out simple typographic errors in these comments, but this one made me laugh:

I drug myself across the floor

I don't know why, but I found this hilarious. The correct past tense is "dragged" but in this case "pulled" may fit better.
You should leave it though, this is brilliant.
Anyway, the chapter as a whole was good.
We get mopey Terra, two talks with father (nicely handled, by the way), an Applejack cameo, and... Cherry's boyfriend? I dunno on that last one. I'm sure we'll find out who he is next chapter.
Looking forward to it!

Try to use Arabic Numerals for most numbers

5730276
5730063
New chapter is up guys ~ Sorry for the wait!

Interesting. Your phrasing and word choice is still occasionally a little clunky, but I liked the development in this chapter.

It's good to see you've started the sequel, and with an early twist:pinkiehappy: To bad poor Sweetie Belle had to be in the middle of it. I only wish you had made more chapters while I was gone, I hate waiting to see what happens next.:ajbemused:

6223193 Its up!
I'm so sorry it took so long. I was busy this summer, and then I got 100% technology grounded at one point. I had it half finished right before I was grounded, I just wasn't able to do anything until now. I've been thinking a lot about this and what I want to do. You know, plan ahead deaths and play with Ideas.
In case you haven't noticed, I'm also trying to lengthen my chapters :)

And so the drama builds:raritystarry: Intersting way if bringing up there 'jobs' to say. Also with Celestia dead you ruined my hopes that discord had her prisoner and using her magic to power the games:ajsleepy:
Other than that you did fine by me with with chapter length.

Ohh, suspence :raritystarry: I can't wait for another chapter :raritycry:

Comment posted by Sketch-Pad deleted Oct 20th, 2015

I am waiting for Terra to punch her father:pinkiesmile:
Just waiting:scootangel:

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