• Member Since 6th Feb, 2013
  • offline last seen Last Thursday


The name's Dash. (Previously Ronnie) And I write humanized pony stories. Welcome to my humble page.


Comments ( 176 )

yay new story! Oh, before anyone rude points it out, it says "slumper" in the description.

5337864 oh *smacks forehead* thank you!

Twilight blushed even more at the implications at what her rainbow haired human friend had said. “Not exactly, no,”


Technically Sunset finished at -1. She should have to do something embarrassing on top of flashing.

Cute story

I love how despite that this story isn't a clopfic in the technical way (Like the description says, no actual sex, just references to the sexual organs and a raunchy concept) it's still listed as a clopfic since it has a Mature rating and has the Sex tag. FiMFiction is weird.

Oh, and great story!

Sequel please with the Dazzling's!

5338140 oooh! Ill think about! :rainbowlaugh:

OK, that ending had me laughing.

“Does the person with the most fingers down win?” She directed towards Sunset.

Dash let out a loud snort.

“Let’s just say that you don’t want to be that person,” Sunset advised her, patting her on the back.

Well this will be mentally scarring.

Pinkie waited until the rest of the girls were ready before starting. “Okay...Never Have I Ever....Walked in on my parents!”

Wow, she went right for the kidneys! :rainbowlaugh:

Dash doubled over. “What the fuck, Pinkie?!" She asked, gasping for air. “What a way to start the game!” Nonetheless though, she put one finger down.

Rarity and Fluttershy did the same.

"Yes, I saw it all...I was there the night Sweetie Belle was conceived."

"Oh...oh my...I thought only bunny rabbits did that..."

“I’ll go,” Sunset volunteered. “Never have I ever...been stuffed in a locker.”

Fluttershy put a finger down.

Wow, Sunset, that's playing dirty.

“Me next!” Dash shouted. “Never Have I Ever...” She paused with a cheeky grin. “Humped my pillow.”

Leave it to Dash to be completely raunchy.

The other girls except for Twilight blushed profusely. Most of them had forgotten that they had to be completely honest for a game like this. They exchanged embarrassed looks before putting a finger down.

:twilightoops: MENTAL IMAGE HEAVEN GO!!

Sunset, who was on her right, whispered something into her ear. A slight blush crept onto her own lavender skin, and she too put a finger down.

:rainbowderp: :rainbowlaugh:

Dash’s eyebrows shot up. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, Twilight?! Seriously?! I never pegged you to be a girl who likes to pleasure herself! Don’t you have like guards who would jump at the chance to do that for you?”

Just the one... :trixieshiftright:

“Never Have Ah Ever...” She glanced at Rainbow with a triumphant look. “Kissed a girl.”

Rainbow Dash glared at the farm girl, but vehemently put a finger down.

Sunset giggled “I think somehow we all knew that was to be expec-” She spluttered, cutting herself off. “Fluttershy?!”

Fluttershy stopped putting her finger down midway as everyone stared at her in surprise. “Well...who do you think kissed her?”


“Okay well then, guess I’ll be taking over,” Rarity took a deep breath. “Never Have I Ever touched a boner.”

Holy SHIT, Rarity! :pinkiegasp:

“Fluttershy, if you lose, is there anything that you have to do as the loser?”

“Besides endure the fact that your friends now know that you’re a perverted sexual freak? No,” She answered with a depressed sigh.

It's ALWAYS the quiet ones.

“Who’s goin’?” Applejack asked.

“Me,” said Fluttershy. “Never Have I Ever masterbated to the thought of someone in this room.”

OUCH, Fluttershy. That's a DEEP stab wound.

Sunset slightly scooted away from Twilight and put a finger down. Her action wasn’t missed by the princess or the others as Twilight blushed and they giggled.


“My turn. Er, I guess,” Twilight said. “Never Have I Ever turned into a black eyed she-demon and tried to take over a high school.”

WOW, Twilight. That was...just...a really low blow.

“Back to me!” Pinkie declared. “Never Have I Ever peed out in public. And I don’t mean in a public bathroom, I mean actually peed on the side of the road or something!”

I thought only guys did that. Usually when drunk.

“Well then, let’s raise the stakes shall we?” Dash said to her before turning to everyone else. “Loser has to flash the winners!”

And suddenly this got 20% hotter.

“Never Have I Ever sucked a dick.” Sunset said.

Pinkie put a finger down.

I'd think Sunset would've had to put a finger down for that as well. There's no WAY she's fellatio-free.

AJ rolled her shoulders. “Okay....Never Have Ah Ever had a sexual thought about one of my siblings.”

Twilight put a finger down.

Less surprised than I should be.

Fluttershy rolled her eyes. “I figured that,” She sighed. “Never Have I Ever had phone sex with someone.”

Says the queen of the phone porn voice...

“What was your phone sex name?!” Pinkie asked, jumping up and down. “Did you have any regular customers?! Do any of them go to our school?! Have any of them recognized you?!”

Sunset blinked at the sudden barrage of questions. “Uh, Sunshine, yes, yes and yes.” She answered.

“Who?!” Pinkie shouted excitedly.

“Flash Sentry and Snips and Snails.”

:rainbowlaugh: That explains EVERYTHING!!

She rummaged through it, creating sounds that should not be coming from a normal teenage girl’s closet.

Goat, jackhammer, foghorn, hissing snake, FWEEE!!...

She emerged minutes later with something akin to Pony Pinkie’s Party Cannon, only it was much, much bigger. “Never Have I Ever gotten confetti in my mouth!” She yelled.

There was a short chorus of “What?!” before confetti was flying everywhere. The room temporarily became blindingly speckled with bright pieces of yellow, blue, and green confetti. The girls coughed up a few pieces as the dust settled, before glaring at Pinkie and putting a finger down.

Hey! Pinkie's cheating! :flutterrage:

“Never Have I Ever eaten ass.” Sunset said, making a gagging sound. “There’s only so much I’ll do for someone and that isn’t one of those things.”

“You mean ass as in donkey?” Twilight asked curiously.

“No, she means ass as in,” Dash got up and shook her butt in Twilight’s face. “Ass!”

:rainbowlaugh: at Rainbow's ass, :pinkiesick: at the eating thereof.

“I have class cause I don’t eat ass!” Pinkie sang at the top of her lungs, causing the other girls to cackle with breathless laughter.


That...oh god...that killed me... :rainbowlaugh:

5338227 This story is much better than yours. Finally some real quality.

This was funny I enjoyed this take this spot on my favourites bookcase

5338294 You know...everyone gets it. You hate my guts. You don't really need to keep harping on about it. I know I'm sick of it. I know other people are sick of it. I also know that you'll well on your way to being reported for harassment if you don't knock it off. There's no need for this. Just...stop.

5338294 hey now, that ain't nice. No one's tryna show up anyone. In fact it was inspired by his story. So mosey on somewhere else with your negative attitude. :ajbemused:


Friendly neighborhood reminder that it is not cool to suddenly introduce personal grudges into comments and attack people. Particularly not when it's totally unprovoked, and definitely not when it's on another author's story--ain't no author needing that kind of fight starting him.

Hoping we can all be friends here! Or, at least, respectful acquaintances who are polite to each other in company.

Have a nice day.

“Never have I Ever...licked someone’s balls. Uck! I love having fun as much as the next lady but some things are just too, too-”
Sunset and Rainbow each put a finger down as the other girls guffawed.
“Revolting! Absolutely revolting! You two should be ashamed of yourselves!”

Why am I laughing so hard ? I should not be surprised !
But that's f*cking hilarious anyway ! :rainbowlaugh:

oh dear lord I remember this game me and some friends got together and decided to play it the rules was like yours except everyone was sitting down in chairs and if you did what ever the person said you'd have to get up and go to another chair or your in the middle and have to say Never Have I ever whatever fun game

Man, this was hilarious! I love party game stories :rainbowlaugh:

And damn that ending, I can totally sympathize with pinkie :ajsleepy:

Someone should do more of these, some brave, hilarious soul :trollestia:

Never have I ever kept my hand down in response to this question!

and two giant bowls of popcorn,

Micheal Jackson's happy.

Twilight’s eyebrows furrowed. “Walked in on them doing what?”

Soo innocent.

Sunset’s eyes down casted. “Sorry about that, Flutters.”

Applejack cleared her throat. “Never Have Ah Ever...” She glanced at Rainbow with a triumphant look. “Kissed a girl.”

:raritydespair:How could you lie like that!?

“Besides endure the fact that your friends now know that you’re a perverted sexual freak? No,”

We all know that already.

Twilight said. “Never Have I Ever turned into a black eyed she-demon and tried to take over a high school.”

Below the belt.

I used to have a teeny weeny schoolgirl crush on my brother.” More like an infatuation, but she wasn’t going to tell them that.

It's not creepy.

“Never Have I Ever....kissed a boy.” She said.

She's licked balls but not...why Dash?

Hang on a minute. Rainbow has never kissed a boy or sucked a dick, but she has licked someone's balls? What?

Other than that bizarre little nugget this story was highly entertaining, Good work!

5341041 it was probably a dare. Forgot to mention that. :twilightblush:

Damnit I got 12 in this game while reading this story. Any ways loved it!!!!!:pinkiehappy:
Also might do a reading on this ^_^

5341275 oooh please do! I would love to hear it!! :pinkiegasp::pinkiehappy::twilightsmile:

I only got 5. Possibly 6 depending on the definition of phone sex.

Good story.

Well, this was a fun little story.

Any chance of a sequel chapter where Twilight tries to introduce the game to her friends in Equestria...only to find out they're even worse in that regard than their counterparts?

Alrighty then!! Woo also if you wanna have a role in the reading as well, the spot is open for you
(Also wooo another New York Brony /))

5341480 someone suggested a sequel with the dazzlings but this is way better! We'll see :raritywink:

5341504 I'm not much a voice actor so i think ill pass :twilightsheepish: but yeah whoo! NY bronies! /)

Oh! And then the Princess sleepover (Celestia, Luna, Cadence, and Twilight) (of course, all ponies would have to use a scorecard rather than fingers), and Twilight discovers they're even worse.

Twilight: Cadence! What if Shining found out about some of those things?
Cadence: Twilight...Shiny was involved in most of them.
Twilight: ...EW EW EW EW EW EW EW!

5341566 ohohohoh that is so tempting! Maybe in the near future i could write a sequel...i still have a lot ahead of me haha! :scootangel:

I always thought this was a drinking contest... well, good read anyway, even better the second time.

I kind of enjoy the "Mane 6 play a raunchy sleepover-game" fanfics.
Someone needs to create a group just for those.

I'm glad you like the ideas.

Oh, here's one that would be somewhat hilarious and awkward. At the Ponyville sleepover...

Twilight: Well, here's one I know shouldn't get any...Never Have I Ever given a dragon a blow job.
Spike gets panicky. All five of the other girls give themselves a point.
Twilight: What the buck, girls?

who said that the balls were of the male anatomy? she is an athlete

Who else read the Featured On sentence not in Rarity's voice, but in Jim Carrey's?

This was fun to read. 10/10. 100/100. 1/1. :) you did a great job at capturing that same feel that Cards Against Equestria Girls had :)

“All in favor of the rule change, say ‘I’!

I think you meant 'aye'.

It was once again time for one of Twilight’s monthly visits.


“Never Have Ah Ever slept in the nude.” Applejack said, with a smirk.

Pinkie put a finger down. “Guilty!” She sing-songed.

Twilight (and most ponies) have done that.
*Puts a finger down*
What? It was freaking hot outside, and the AC was busted.

“A dick. You know, a penis?” Sunset simplified for her.
“And here in this world, you guys...put your mouths on it?” Twilight was even more confused than before. “Isn’t that a little unhygienic?”


Is it bad that I had no fingers left in the end? :rainbowkiss::rainbowlaugh:

5343405 Damn some of those things were deep. The feels for sunset when she tells about her job of phone sex. :fluttercry: And then when she says she's eaten meat I can only imagine twilight's face. But really man/woman/person, well written flawlessly executed story. I commend you.

Thank you for continuing to be a bastion of friendship and tolerance.

“Me,” said Fluttershy. “Never Have I Ever masterbated to the thought of someone in this room.”

Sunset slightly scooted away from Twilight and put a finger down. Her action wasn’t missed by the princess or the others as Twilight blushed and they giggled.

Nearly dropped my hot drink there, close one.


Sunset and Rainbow haven't sucked dick, BUT they've licked balls? That must be one hell of a story.

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