All that is gold
The day has finally arrived as Pinkie and Maud approach the train station. On their way, they passed various colorful storefronts and Pinkie mentioned how they should go shopping the next time Maud comes to visit. Maud doesn’t say much, instead giving a nod here and there in reply. While Pinkie is sad to see Maud go, she is also happy that they’ve spent so much time having fun together. Still, there was so much more she wanted to show her sister before she left.
After their visit to the crystal cavern, Pinkie bought Maud a necklace from the souvenir shop that actually used crystals from the cave. She could see her sister's eyes sparkle when she gave her the gift as a going away present. Maud tended to dress rather plainly and Pinkie wanted her to have something that really stood out. There was no doubt in Pinkie’s mind that the necklace did indeed add a certain je ne sais quoi which highlights the natural beauty her sister usually seems too disinterested to show.
“That necklace really looks nice on you,” Pinkie compliments.
“Thank you.”
“Did you enjoy yourself?”
“I did.”
“What’d you think of Anon?” Pinkie presses, suddenly changing tack. “Did you like him?”
Maud can tell that Pinkie is trying her best to keep this casual. It wouldn’t be the first time they’ve had an emotional parting and it certainly won’t be the last. Pinkie can get a bit emotional at times but Maud knows it comes from a good place in her heart.
“He’s nice. It’s good to know someone is watching over my little sister.”
Pinkie can feel her eyes starting to water. “Don’t say stuff like that, Maud, or I’ll start crying again.”
“Sorry. I just worry about you.”
“I know.” Pinkie clears her eyes. “Still, you’re going off to a new school and all that. I’m the one who should be worried!”
“I’ll be fine.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right...”
The two of them finally make it to the station, the train already waiting at the platform. Pinkie hoped they’d have a bit more time to talk to one another, as these days it’s rare for them to spend much time together, but Maud has always had a knack for planning trips. She’s not surprised to find the train has already arrived.
“My ride's here,” Maud says, turning to face her sister. “Take care, Pinkie.”
Pinkie can feel tears building up in her eyes, so she moves in close and gives her sister a hug to stifle them. Maud returns the hug easily as she feels Pinkie tremble a bit in her hooves.
“We’ll see each other again soon, right?”
Maud pats her sister on the back a bit before pulling away and giving her a small smile. “Of course.”
That’s all she says before she turns to board her train. Pinkie didn’t want to cry on this day, but she can already feel the dam breaking, tears rolling down her cheeks as the train starts to take off from the station. Pinkie notices her sister at a window seat and gives her a wave, one Maud returns as the train continues to pick up pace. It doesn’t take long for the train to leave Pinkie’s sight, but she’s still waving even as it hits the horizon.
After a few minutes she releases a forlorn sigh. She glances over at her own saddlebag that is packed and ready for her to return to Ponyville. If she’s going to regret one thing, it’s not getting to say goodbye to Anon properly. Sure they spoke during the party, but she would have spoken with him privately had he not appeared so busy.
A quiet voice snaps her out of her stupor. “Pinkie?”
To her surprise, Pinkie turns around to find Fluttershy. She quickly flips her somber mood and tries to act a bit more cheerful as she cleans her face a bit.
“Hey, Fluttershy!” Pinkie walks up to Fluttershy with a smile. “You heading back today?”
She nods. “I have all my things packed. You?”
“Yup! All ready to head home. I bet Gummy is worried sick about me.”
“I know how you feel. I’m sure all the animals will be happy to see me back.”
Pinkie nods. “I’m sure they will. Angel has been doing a great job watching them. I think you’ll be surprised by how much has changed.”
Fluttershy cocks her head at that. “Really?”
“Yeah! That trainer Celestia sent over was so sweet, but super firm. I was there just to make sure everything was alright, but she was quick to get all those animals into shape. ”
Fluttershy sighs in relief. “It’s good to hear that. I was worried that something would happen.”
“Don’t be! I'm sure you’ll love the change.”
Fluttershy smiles at that. “So how have things been in Ponyville? We didn’t have much time to talk at Anon’s party.”
Pinkie feels her smile slip a bit. “Well, I’ll be honest, Fluttershy... I don’t really know. I’ve kinda been keeping my distance for the most part.”
“Is there something wrong?”
“I don’t know... I still feel kinda weird about everything that happened, you know?”
Fluttershy nods understandingly. “Yeah, I have that feeling too. Have you talked to any of our friends?”
“I’ve talked to AJ some, but Rarity is pretty much locked in her house. As for Rainbow... We don’t know where she is.”
“Oh my... I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. It’ll take time before things get back to normal.”
Pinkie shakes away the mood. This isn’t a time to be a mopey dopey over all this stuff! They should be celebrating the positives!
“What did you think about Anon’s party?”
Though puzzled by the sudden change of topic, Fluttershy accepts Pinkie’s wish to speak of something more lighthearted. “It was very nice. I met so many friendly ponies.”
Pinkie then finds herself wondering something. “Fluttershy... Did Anon invite you to the party?”
Fluttershy nods. “Yes, actually. It’s a bit of an odd story.”
Pinkie wants to hear about this; she knows full well that Anon can be rather firm with who he lets into his life, but knowing that he’s trying to open up to ponies is always wonderful to hear.
“We have time. The train just left so we have a few hours before the next one comes.”
Wow, Fluttershy arrived sooner than she’d thought. It’s a good thing that Pinkie is here to chat with. For a moment, it feels as if things are back to normal.
“Well, alright. So, I was talking to Blueblood in the garden when Anon showed up...”
Gilda is walking down the streets of Canterlot. Well, wandering would be more accurate. She’d been thinking about a lot of things ever since she spoke with Anon: what happened to her in Ponyville, Rainbow Dash, and everything else in between. She even finds her thoughts returning to the fair when she was embraced by him. She can feel herself blush a bit. It’s still embarrassing for her to remember, but was admittedly rather pleasant. He’s very nice in an odd way, something Gilda isn’t used to.
Ponies avoid her for the most part. Even as she walks down this street, all of the ponies give her a wide berth. There’s a reason why many griffins avoid Equestria: despite all their talk of friendship, many ponies aren’t willing to befriend anyone outside of their own species. At one time, Gilda thought things were different with Rainbow, but that certainly wasn’t the same after all the time that passed. It still pained her to remember that day in Ponyville.
She admits to having been a jerk, but she felt threatened in a way: they were supposed to hang out alone that day, and yet, time after time, one of those rotten ponies would show up to try and steal her away... At least that’s what Gilda believed at the time. So she lashed out; she didn’t care about the party and all the gifts. She just cared about Rainbow and how their friendship wasn't what it used to be.
There was a time when Rainbow protected Gilda, but all it took was one day for Gilda to become the bad guy. All their years together, gone and long forgotten. Hearing Anon tell that story was beyond infuriating. Why didn’t he just talk to someone about it? Get help? Was he too proud? Too stupid? ...Too afraid? She clicks her beak in frustration... She knows why. Griffins do it all the time.
He’s loyal to a fault. Willing to suffer in silence for the sake of others. It pisses her off! If she were there, then she wou-
Gilda stops in the center of the street. What was that thought just now? Would she protect him? Another click. This is all pointless to think about. The story he told her―or the punishment rather―is what interested her the most. She can’t even begin to describe how sweet it was for her to hear about Rainbow’s comeuppance. Ever since she was a filly she talked about joining the Wonderbolts; to have that taken from her was music to Gilda’s ears.
“You look like you’re lost in your own little world,” a familiar voice calls out.
Gilda jerks slightly, turning to discover it was that orange pony from before. What was her name again? Spit something?
“Oh, uh... Hey... you?” Gilda walks off without another word.
“Come on now, no need to give me the brush-off,” Spitfire says as she catches up to Gilda. “Name’s Spitfire, by the way. We talked a few days ago on the roof, and at the party.”
Oh yeah, that was her name. Well, that was one mystery solved.
“I didn’t hurt your friend, in case you’re only here to ask that,” Gilda remarks.
“I know that, seeing as you haven’t been turned into a pile of dust. I’m glad you took my advice; were you satisfied with what you’ve learned?”
“I guess.”
Gilda doesn’t like how casual this conversation is. This pony is starting to weird her out. Then again, at least she isn’t talking to that bat pony protecting Anon. Gilda still gets a shiver down her spine whenever she thinks about her.
“Wanna get a drink? I’m sure there’s a lot of stuff we can talk about.”
Gilda will admit she could use a drink to get her mind off of everything that’s been happening, but one problem does come to mind.
“Got no bits.”
“Drinks are on me if you’re willing to spare a few minutes for a small chat.”
Well, if Gilda likes one thing, it’s free drinks. “Sure, I guess I can waste some time.”
As she closes the store for the day, Lyra moves in a sluggish, almost machine-like manner. She makes sure that everything is clean and orderly before walking into the back kitchen. All of the cooks have long since left for home; the entire place is spotless. Lyra feels a twinge in her heart as her mind drifts to Anon. They’re trained this well because of what he taught them. It’s amazing how much more smoothly things run since they hired these ponies to help.
She remembers a time when the three of them struggled to keep up with the constant demand for their candy. There were times when the three of them went without sleep to ensure that they could keep the quota. Yet despite all of the trouble, those are the moments Lyra misses the most. The three of them moved as one and rarely said anything, even as they handed one another ingredients or utensils. That’s when she felt the closest to Anon and Bonbon.
Now, now things are different. Products are easily and swiftly made at the outstanding quality Anon strives for. No customer has to wait long before a fresh batch is ready for them. The pace has picked up so much that Lyra even noticed new ponies stop by to see what they offered. It’s what they’ve always talked about; it’s what they’ve worked so hard for and yet Anon is not here to see the fruits of their labor.
All because of her.
Lyra walks over to the second set of doors leading to their normal kitchen. Once she enters she finds Bonbon at the table poring over paperwork. After the friction with Anon, everything in their relationship fell into disarray. Bonbon spent a lot of time crying back here, rarely going to the kitchen or storefront unless she had to. Even now she looked tired, crunching numbers and taking note of what supplies they have.
“Everything is okay,” Lyra says to Bonbon.
She doesn’t respond, curtly nodding her head. Lyra worries that they’re beginning to grow distant. It hasn’t even been two days and yet their world is crumbling around them. She wishes she could do something to take everything back but even now she can feel a yearning to see Anon, to be close to him, to be held by him... She grits her teeth. She doesn’t know why but she just can’t stop thinking about him.
“I... I’m going to bed,” is all Lyra says as she exits the room.
Bonbon is left by herself as she places a hoof to her temple and sets her paperwork down. Her eyes start to water, but she rubs them a bit to stop herself from crying. Things are going great and yet she’s never felt as lonely as she does now. Anon was her best friend, her only friend... Now he’s gone. Even as things happened in the kitchen, she started to notice things weren’t the same: his reprimanding of Butterhooves; the sounds of his unique footfalls as he paced about the store, helping wherever he could; his questions about how well they were doing.
She never noticed how she got used to these small things. Now that he’s gone, her life seems almost unbearably empty without them. She agonizes over Anon; she can’t stop thinking about him. Maybe in many ways she does love him, but not like Lyra... She sees him as family. She’s never had a family, and to have someone as close to her as Anon leave is excruciating. Still, she understands why he left, and distressingly, she has yet to find a solution for their problem.
Talking to Lyra won’t work and Bonbon doesn’t want to be thrust into another predicament like they had at the party. She doesn’t want to lose Anon or Lyra and yet both are rapidly drifting further and further away. Bonbon doesn’t even notice that more tears are streaming down her cheeks until they start to fall onto the page below her. She clears them as she pushes her work aside and steels herself. She can’t keep spending her days shutting herself away in despair because of this.
This is just another challenge for her to overcome! She doesn’t know what to do, but she’s sure that there’s somepony out there with a solution. She’ll work hard with Lyra to make things right, and then she’ll speak to Anon. Her mind flashes back to when Anon and her were at the park. She remembers the pained look on his face as he spoke to her. He’s hurting just as much as she is and for now he’s put the ball in her court.
“Don’t worry, Anon... I’ll figure something out.”
With her thoughts and plans assured, Bonbon, returns her focus to her papers. It’ll take time but she swears that she’ll see Anon again, and soon.
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Damn, what an ending.
This. This is why I leave completed stories on my tracklist, just in case they update with new chapters just like this one did. Nice to see some additional fleshing out with Gilda and Bonny/Lyra in particular.
Admittedly, I was half expecting a punchline, considering the date it was published >_>
I'm so glad that this roller coaster of emotions and events can continue despite the melancholy way this chapter has ended. I will enjoy watching how all these characters resolve their emotional baggage, come to a place where they truly understand one another, and begin to move into the next phase of their lives.
Wow, I'm lucky I decided to look over my favourites list when I clicked favourite on "How Many Lovers Have You Made Today?" or I would have missed this amazing chapter! To be honest, I didn't check the upload date and thought this was came out a bit after the story was marked complete, I was so confused as to why there was an unread chapter in the story
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That is why I keep all the books that I have read in one list (bookshelf) just in case something updates. Of course, I also have my top, divinity, one-shots, one-shots divinity and a few others to keep everything nice and organized and make sure I don't miss anything.
I was suspicious too and then he released How many lovers have you made today on the same day and I was scared. I hate April fools.
Poor Bon Bon. Lost her friend and finally a mention of Rarity, Rainbow Dash and AJ. AJ probably bounced back the best but Rarity lost a lot of credibility (and was the only one that tried to apologize before the truth came out) but Rainbow Dash had her entire dream dashed to the ground.
i loved it
My feel for this story is: Every reader has a head cannon and every writer has the same. The authors head cannon for his universe is good.
Even if we do not see Twilight crimes spelled 100% out we can witness that in this universe she is some what of a shite pony... though from the original universe we should blame Celestia/her parents for that.
The elements of Harmony in this world are not those who choose worthy bearers but those who will serve the needed task, thus no paragon mane six like the other fics but deeply flawed ponies.
This does not match my head cannon but it is still fun to read. I like pay back fics even if it is against my favorite characters (so long as those characters act like c-nts). Keep up the good work:)!
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Hehehe. I see what you did there. But yeah. To be honest.. I hope Rainbow Dash does not recover from this. She deserves it
Thought the story was over, but now it’s time to read rhe conclusion.
Thanks for the epilogue. Glad to see some update with the other characters.
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Well actually, AJ did try to apologize, and defend him too, back in Ponyville. Rarity also tried to apologize, and while she was in Canterlot she tried again, though when it became public spectacle she's also the only one that lied (though admittedly, Twilight was oblivious to what she did wrong, and RD was actually combative against the princesses, and a blithering idiot to boot, but I repeat myself).
AJ, RD, and Rarity all did something pretty detestable. I won't get into my thoughts and theories on the matter again, as I did that just a page ago (see linked comment below, if interested).
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Good ppints on the link. And i got to agree, the CMC's as catalysts for Anon to deal with AJ, RD, and Rarity would be a good way to deal with things.
I read a lot of comments on how the "punishment didn't fit the crime" on both ends. I've heard reasoning on culture, mindsets, mental disorders, and even one or two about story makeup. I don't think such a balance exists for this instance.
Evidence 1: The Incident.
It was the equivalent of an arachnophobe getting locked in a closet by an acquaintance with said acquaintance's 7 pet tranchulas and being left there for 2 hours. "I don't like spiders." "You just need to get to know them." "No. Please, no." *gets ignored* "Careful with Charlotte, she just laid eggs."
Evidence 2: "What did I do wrong?"
Twilight is obviously a sociopath. Cadence mentions "that little voice" and she responds with "What voice?" She doesn't have a conscience(at least not a traditional one). While that doesn't mean she is bad by default, she doesn't sympathise automatically.
Evidence 3: Anons thought process
I admit I think a lot like him. Panic attacks are my number one fear. My emotions snowball, feeding into one another, clouding my thought and logic, logic that hold the key to calming down, the more it happens the more others see and notice, and judge, and try to help, and try to stop it, but only I can,butIcan't,anditwon'tanditsfoggyandmyheadhurtsandmychestburns-... Yeah that. To avoid this contentment is your best tool. I limit what I care about, I lower my standards, I try to view my own life through a window. I believe Anon is similar. He just wants to move past things.
With the uniqueness of the situation and the emotional weight, this result is probably the best mix of realistic and satisfaction.
To both Anon and Sarcastic, I commend you and look forward to the (hopefully) more Lighthearted sequel.
Boof, its done? Boof, no dramatic ominous shadow watching in the distance? Boof, no pennywise lurking in the sewers of canterlot? Boof, no dramatic scene where Anon is disarming a bomb at the last final seconds or else canterlot will be finished?-? Boof, you've done well. (Boof is mai "~desu"....~boof XD)
finally done with the story and I can only think of how poorly everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, went... through his choice to maintain distance from Lyra and Bonbon he started the very thing he wanted to avoid, because of Luna's obsession with protecting Anon with the desire to do anything to keep him safe the realization of what she did to spike put an innocent child in the warpath and now undercut her chances with the human that she supposedly cares about. He's going to be too stuck in his ways to invest in the two of them since he's so damn introverted that it's like looking at the Titanic from a nearby boat and no one wants to pay attention to the guy shouting "ICEBERG AHEAD YOU IDIOTS! CHANGE COURSE!"
I'm gonna be honest, getting to the end of this story has made me very apprehensive about thinking to read the sequel to this one and it upsets me because you are a great writer, a bit of review through sentence structure and flow by a proofreader would make all the difference, but that's not the big issue because despite that bit of nitpicking, you've still created a story that I was invested in reading to the very end. I liked reading the first one because despite it being sad, Celestia was always able to put a good bit of comedy in for the story and was willing to be that rock that the main character needed. Luna doing what she did proves that not only is Nightmare Moon right about being wrongly accused of being a monster... it makes me think that Luna herself is going to go to a very dark place again and hurt the only ones that truly care(d) about her in her attempts to protect them.
by this point I'm rambling because it's 1AM and this story has gotten me emotional... I just don't know if I want to read the final book in the trilogy
Reading this story after the first one really makes me think the author has a dislike for some of the main 6, at least Rarity and RD.
While the former seemed to be the only one of the six who willfully put Anon in a potentially life threatening situation (for entirely selfish reasons, way to go element for the element of generosity), the latter just fucked up by being ignorant and reckless (as she tends to be even in the show).
AFAIK there was no malicious intent in what Rainbow Dash did, yet, she got her life-long dreams crushed without being given as much as a chance for redemption and then we never heard from her again. (maybe she went off and killed herself, who knows)
Aw heckin Yeah! This is going to be a heckin swell story my buddy bois!
No Gilda, everyone likes free drinks!
An excellent continuation! Love the last Twilight scene! On to the next story!
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she had her chance, she spent who knows how long in school learning about all that stuff, and after that she spent years dreaming about being a wonderbolt, she had one job, learn. because she refused to so much as pay attention in class she lost her chance to be a wonderbolt, like spitfire said, it wasn't even the Anon incident, she would have been kicked out on the first day for sheer ignorance and willful lack of learning
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Specifically according to this author and specifically cause it would give this author's character Anon a reason to be in conflict with the main six. Any writer could have just as easily written Celestia into hating Anon's very existence because of his connection to Discord. There are even stories that do just that. The problem is when it doesn't match the character themselves.
Does it make sense for the captain of the Ponyville weather team to not know the dangers of weather, even if she's shown as not the type for book learning? Surely if she was such a drop out she would never make captain, weather teams don't really need pure speed. No it doesn't make much sense.
Even further to make her crimes look worse, the author pulled out Gilda and made a head cannon about griffons being weak to lightning to make Rainbow look even worse for not knowing Anon could have died, something he could have easily spoken up about that got glossed over with "she never let me tell her". You'd think if his life was in danger he'd figure out how to get that message to her, especially considering he was living with Pinkie, Rainbow's friend.
As a specific note to the author I don't hate your writing despite how harsh I am about this specific problem the Celestia/Anon was fun and adorable. I just have a huge aversion to disproportionate retribution in stories and misplaced blame. You've made your Rainbow Dash morally reprehensible but you've also made her a completely different character while it looks like people in the comments think this is just how she is. I'm not asking you to change anything I'm just commenting cause of how many comments were on this and the first story that were absolutely bloodthirsty and praising the story for not sucking up to the mane six and how they were glad you weren't "sugar-coating" their characters. These comments are my annoyance at them rather than at you specifically.
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Yeah, but I'm the one reading your comments, not them. I've talked about this for over four years now. My characters aren't OOC; they are perfectly in character. The difference, whether you like it or not, is that I turned their negative traits up to eleven. As far as the headcanon stuff with griffins, well, making up stuff is what authors do.
I believe the reason my story gets as much praise as it does is because it's based in a world that is very rare for fiction. A world where Equestria isn't perfect, things get hurt, and not everything is fixed in thirty minutes or less. It's real, and while some people won't like that because of reasons, it's what the story is.
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"Turning they're negative traits up to eleven" as you say is exactly what caricaturization is. They are not themselves they are caricatures of themselves at least Dash and Rarity are.
You polled your audience on what they wanted and they wanted the punishments I'm not faulting you for writing to your audience and I can see why they praised you.
The making up of a head cannon is fine too obviously yes. It just grinds against wrongful blame when a headcannon is held up to the actions of actual cannon without any accounting for changes that head cannon should have caused. It's like you make a new universe, slap the old character in it, and then punish her for not knowing the different rules of the new universe. Exactly like Anon's interaction with Mr. Cake, Anon's not at fault for not knowing about the teeth thing but a Rainbow Dash who had a Griffon as a friend, somehow never knew griffon's had this or this info never came up.
Not having everything immediatly solved is great, making a story where the ponies aren't perfect is aslo great. It's the negative traits dialed up to eleven that sat wrong with me. AJ's incident was initially very jarring and shocking seemed completely out of character but then you show her side and how she was just having a royally bad day and her temper got the best of her. That was perfect, it completely turned my opinion on the incident, that was very understandable and realistic.
I have the feeling you deliberately made the actions as shocking as possible for dramatic effect. Getting their side made those scenes, which were originally so over the top, make a lot more sense in hindsight. But I didn't really see one for Rainbow or Rarity so I'm just left with that initial reaction of this doesn't seem right.
I can agree that Rarity is rather greedy in the show. She's my least favorite of the cannon Mane Six for how the show makes her seem so selfish. I don't think she'd ever think sending someone to the diamond dogs to destroy their clothes would ever work though.
I don't know. I read the first story and felt compelled to comment on how it didn't make me feel like the mane six were getting portrayed fairly, and how I couldn't really enjoy them getting their comeuppance when they were acting so off, after reading the last chapter of that story I think I can withdraw that statement for all but Dash and Rarity. But that's just my opinion, take it however you want, even if you just ignore it. That "more toward the commenters that towards you" comment was because I really didn't want to hurt your feelings with my reaction to the story when I realized it might have been sounding overly harsh because how adamnt I was replying to people calling for blood so to speak.
Then don't use OOC. It stands for "out of character." There's a big difference between something that is a caricature and what is out of character.
I think there is a huge misunderstanding here. That "poll" was a joke. It didn't affect the outcome of the story, the ending was planned far ahead of that comment and the storm of replies. I thought at the time it would be fun to see everyone's reaction and opinion.
Let me submit this thought to you. Rainbow Dash, an element of loyalty, turned her back on her childhood friend without a second thought. If that wasn't in the show and was written in a fanfic, would you say it's OOC? Now, following that line of thought, knowing her unloyalty is canon. Why is it farfetched to believe that Rainbow never truly learned anything about Gilda, let alone her biology?
These are the things I think of when writing.
Which, if you read most of the comments, I didn't even come close to some of the suggestions people made for how to punish the mane six. I always knew what I wanted to do and in the end what is written was entirely on me. There were more than a few vocal minority that wanted me to write Anon completely forgiving the mane six with no punishment. It's two extremes that held no influence over what I did.
I get your comments are your opinion but I do feel the need to correct any inaccuracies, as you feel the need to comment against the "bloodthirsty" comments.
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you make a valid argument and I actually agree with you, guess I got lost in the mob frenzy, I'll latch onto any reason to hate the ponies, even if it doesn't make sense..... I need to learn self-control and keep my head on straight
....i'm sorry but what happened to: How many lovers have you made today?
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The continuation can only be found on "Archive of our own" as admins requested I remove the sequel due to it violating the rules: More info about the removal here in the comments
Link to my "Archive of our own" profile
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You. I like you.
Dang, binged both stories and boy oh boy, i did not expect so many feels when i've read the description of the story. Great work!
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I know but I'm saying that she shouldn't Because it's going to get somepony hurt (or it already has) (you didn't expect I replied soon did ya 😏😏😏)
Thus concludes me shotgunning the entirety of "How Many Have You Forgiven Today" in a single weekend!
Something about this ending makes me think about the Mass Effect 1 ending.
Current problem dealt with (Twilight in this fic. Sovereign in ME), but there's more coming.
While I understand that your setting up Bon Bon to potentially be a love interest in the next fic "How Many Lovers Have You Made Today", and to give their collective situation more time to get fixed. It felt a little weird that Anon wouldn't come to try and.... Fix things?.... After he fixed (for the most part) things with Twilight.
I dunno.
I guess I was sort of expecting an end where things where things would fall into place mended with 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow' playing.
I guess my desire for rifts in long term relationships getting mended is probably baggage that I've currently got from watching my local friend circle collapse several times. All of those collapses happened while I was at work (I'm the only one with a normie 9-5 job) so I didn't do anyt-
Holy Shit.
I'm the Spike of my social circle's drama!!
Anyways.
)
Interesting read. Onwards to How Many Lovers!
(Despite the fact that I know, based on your farewell post, that it will 90% likely remain unfinished.
EDIT: Also, I briefly was sorta expecting Twilight to show up at the train station when Pinkie and Fluttershy started talking while waiting for the train.
Though that was likely just because the two sympathetic Elements were gathered and about to go home. I realize that the train station scene is the morning after Anon took Twilight's magic hampering ring, and that it would be sorta nonsense for Twilight to basically sprint out of Canterlot to move back to Ponyville.
9606208
SPOILERS
JACKASS!!!!!!
For the sake of... are you fucking kidding me!? Who? Who was helped by his silence? Nobody. Nobody was helped. Gilda, are you delusional? This is not loyalty. This a person suffering then making himself look better because he says it is loyalty. This is not loyalty. Noone's feelings are being spared! Pinkie was not spared. Bonbon was not spared. His silence only caused more pain. Idiot.
Super bizarre
9801891
Why you're so negative through this story? It's not supposed to be some happy "anon is lonely, meet's princess and fucks them" type.I know criticism is good thing but geez, stop whining about everything.
9928419 I'm not whining, I'm complaining.
9928435
Yeah, but you do that on every chapter. Why you didn't come up with something positive for once? It's not like your story is better than these.
9928816 I would say something positive if I had a positive opinion of a chapter. You made quite a claim about my work. I will say there is at least an attempt at justice for the wrongs against others.
10039494
I hear you. Pity it is unfinished. Though as a writer myself, I am aware of that it is harder to try and keep to a longer story such as this. Just wished he could have posted all the plans he had for the story before leaving.
10039457 forgive me for not understanding, but are you saying that my angry rants made sense? Or are you saying that I do not understand the story? (Which I do not as it seems mindlessly excessive to the point of being almost bland and pointless to me)
If you seek to understand my perceptions more, I can recommend a course of action. (Out of respect for the author I will not specify what that is)
10039653
Ultimately... I think you're not compatible with the story, in a way. While I can understand and accept most of the developments and turmoil in these chapters, you're clearly no-sale'ing the whole thing.
I think it has more to do with your character than anything else. Maybe I'm just hurt and jaded, and it shows through such things like appreciation for other things expressing much of the same. You wrote a scalding 'review' of all of this in the comment, and yet what really shines through to me, from every other line, is "Why do this? I don't get it!", essentially.
10039925 For me, it was more frustration that basically all the characters were mentally and emotionally beaten to a pulp and left for dead and nobody cared whether or not they ever recovered as individuals. Once a battle is over, treat the wounded or put them out of their misery. Do you punish a child by putting them in the corner for a month straight? No, they would think you hate them. Do you punish an adult by making them go to court and pay fines every day for a year? No, that is cruel. Well that is what we have here. This story figuratively left them to bleed out with no hope of any future or forgiveness, or compassion in any way. It screamed of cruelty.
When I read a redemption story, I expect to see SOME form of consolation for those who have been hurt on all sides. That is utterly absent here for the Mane 6. They are treated as villains for the rest of the story. It would have been more merciful to just execute Twilight and Rainbow Dash. There is no redemption or hope. As a person who deals with manic depression, I know how hopelessness feels and it is represented here in graphic detail. It is like the author was showing how each one of the characters eventually fell to suicide, but simply decided not to show it. The author displayed every character as unforgiving and unwilling to move on, no matter how much punishment was delivered. Luna took it to the point of literal psychological TORTURE. There was no kindness or mercy anywhere in this story and I dare say Hitler himself might give Luna a nod of approval.
If this was supposed to be a redemption story, it failed.
If this was supposed to be a story where all hope is lost, it succeeded.
If this story was supposed to have any sort of resolution, it failed.
If this story was meant to illustrate how cruel folks can be, it succeeded.
And the selfish arrogance and pride of the 'protagonist' was just stomach churning.
10039414
You must be bored as shit if you're over here replying to everyone's comments
Oh fuck... I just found these amazing stories and also just found out the third will never be finished...
I loved both of these so thank you for them. That said I... good luck but damn I was looking forward to the conclusion in story 3.
And now the dilemma. Stop here and imagine how it will end or start the third knowing... sigh.
Then there is the reaction of the main 6, when equestrian needs to be save again. How would they feel when equestria needs them the most ? Would they eagerly band together, to save the day again ? I DON'T THINK SO !!!
None. I don't forgive. I get revenge.
Ive really enjoyed this story