• Member Since 22nd Nov, 2014
  • offline last seen July 16th

The Last Mari Lwyd


“I've no truck with snobbery at all. To me they're all the same: literature, porno, dog racing.” - Dean Learner

Comments ( 279 )

I hope you enjoyed these 4.5k words of Adagio/Sunset Shimmer sex scene. (Adaset? Sundagio? I feel like we're in ship naming purgatory here.)

When I started I only planned it to be around 2k words, but Adagio insisted I keep going.

You know how she is.

lh4.googleusercontent.com/-tuWBpYchj6s/AAAAAAAAAAI/AAAAAAAAAFM/HjlNLH5uukM/photo.jpg

ANYWAY. Because of time constraints I didn't get to include any of the cute morning after stuff. And having written this sex scene, I realised there were a whole bunch of surrounding questions. How did their meeting in a club become an invitation to domination? Exactly how dysfunctional is their relationship going to be from here? What are Sunset's friends going to say when they find out? What's the deal with her apartment?

We might not find answers to all of these, but there's enough there to earn an Incomplete tag.

Oh, this is going straight to my fav folder! :pinkiehappy:

Not bad of a story can't wait to read more.

Have a fave, a follow and a million thumbs up. I adored this fic

ew human sex.....

actually just seeing this posted in so many places in my notifications now makes me think of this....

Oh man... Is it hot in here?

Good stuff man. I like what I read.

5304752 I am curious. I believe I will follow, just to see where it goes.:yay:

This was a pretty good fic. Sad that apart from the morning after chapter, it's done.

You should totally write more fics about Sunset and Adagio in a bdsm tone :pinkiehappy:

Comment posted by The Narwhal Assassin deleted Nov 28th, 2014
Comment posted by The Narwhal Assassin deleted Nov 28th, 2014

I can't even do justice with a comment here

From someone who is slowly coming to grips with the fact that Adagio is by far the most interesting of the Siren Trio after my Sonata interest wore off: this was really, really good.

Woah, is this turning into a shipfic? It might be turning into a shipfic. I can't help myself; I just love the chemistry these two have. Might we see more in the future? More porn? More feelings? Maybe.

I definitly would like more porn :p

I like shipfics :raritystarry:
Please sir/ma'am, can we have some more? ;w;

Not ashamed to admit that I read (and enjoyed) the first chapter here.

And then this second one is actually rather cute and quite beautiful. I'm a big fan of Adagio showing hints of a vulnerable and genuine side of herself in any fic that I read. So to answer your question, more of both please. ;)

all the upvotes, I don't care where you go with it this is officially the best ship ever

If Sunset had to pick a friend to tell I think she could probably tell Rarity at least without too much risk and possibly get advice or a confidant out of it

Anyone else is either likely not useful (Fluttershy, Pinkie) or asking for trouble (Applejack, but especially Rainbow Dash)

This is a great story. I hope to see this continued! :pinkiesmile:

Thanks everyone! I'm so totally pleased that you're liking what I have to offer so far.

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Definitely gonna continue. I'm thinking I'll try and alternate between sex and shippy chapters, just to keep things interesting.

“You know what? I'm not going to screw around with 'it's not like I like you or anything' bullshit. I have more self respect than that. Yes, Sunset Shimmer, I DO like you. I think.” She scowled and held up a hand to command silence while she thought. “What I mean to say is: I would like to see you again. And not just for sex.”

And just for that, Adagio has earned all my respect, she may be a bit confused as to what she's feeling, never having felt love, but at least she has more self respect then to try and deny it.

wow im really liking this and not just the sex (but thats def. a fun bonus :D

I'm maybe little too young for this but I like it!

She saw herself, utterly debased – hair a mess, naked, red marks across her ass, tail hanging between her legs.

Man, why it's so fun XD

That was gorgeous... And quite oddly touching. :raritystarry:

I'm not one for (clop) but I will not lie that I would really like to see this continued its honestly really good

This is written really well, all the characters actually feel in character. Please continue.

Can you tell us for sure whether you've decided to continue or not? :pinkiehappy:

5483326

I'm definitely continuing. Third chapter is on its way. :twilightsmile:

I wanted to give it a read... but your face is a boner-killer.

Feelz is the perfect offset to sex. They balance one another in my opinon. The feelz feed me. Give me more power.

5523596

Aye, you're right there. Porn without feels gets old real quick.

Ewww... Human on human sex? You are one sick puppy.
Otherwise good story.

5523605

I know right. I think my soul was forfeit the moment I decided to have not just one, but TWO humans.

And thank you.

(Actually, now I'm considering doing some non-canon chapter with the girls in siren and pony form. Just for laughs, like.)

You're insane, Sunset Shimmer told herself.

Might want to write it as 'You're insane,' and so on for internal thoughts.

'endured the paid'

pain

I just looked at the picture and realsied that Adagio's eyeballs are bigger than her boobs.

I think I might take a pop at this and do a reading of it. No promises, but you're certainly on my list of to do's.

For reference:

'bunched up on'

double space

'been a a naughty pony. Actually, no, I'll do that. But not like THAT. I don't give a fuck how well you're doing redemption.”

Probably change this to something like:

'been a naughty pony... actually, no, I will do that." Adagio smirked. "Just not like THAT. I don't give a fuck how well your 'redemption' is going."

'laptop in front them, balanced on a sturdy book,'

Change to:

"the laptop balanced on a sturdy book in front of them," or put an 'of' after 'front'.

“I mean: You need to pay rent, right?”

Change to:

"I mean- you need to pay rent, right?"

'called 'internet marketing'”

Missing full stop.

'Warmth of Adagio's leg'

Double space.

“Good morning, little pony”

Missing full stop.

'separated by own the thin fabric'

only

'That was surprisingly tender, she thought to herself. And then: Should I tell my friends?

Put the thought in italics/quotation, remove the capital s.

'fire your have'

you

'painfully awware of how'

aware

"Adagio made a little grown in the back of her throat.'

Err... growl? groan?

'fingers and Adagio'd tongue'

Adagio's

'the bag doesn;t open again'

doesn't

'to see your come'

you

'arm over Sunset's shoulder's'

shoulders

5523691 Heh. That's EQG physiology for ya. I still love it though.

Definitely going to follow this. Clop with plot? BDSM that's tender and feelsy rather than rapey? Yes please.

Also, I'm expecting to publish my second (fully complete this time) fic today, and then I get on the site here this morning and find this new chapter.

> today is a good day

I still like the scene from Ch.1 a bit more, as the kids on the bench and the one in the woods was a bit of a turn-off just to me personally, but then it makes sense as it was part of getting at what you were going for this time. ;) And the rest of it was right up there, of course. Curious to find out just how much Dash happened to see and what develops.

And still looking forward to Sunny reversing the roles at some point, heh.

totally worth the wait. Some small mistakes here and there, but someone else already pointed them out.

how much fun would it be if Sunset tried to explain to RD what was happening, and then Dash holds up a hand and says "I want in"

Great chapter, I do so love my exhibitionism. Especially when it's a sub doing it under orders of a dom :p

(The best ending to this would've been Adagio making Sunset show Dash a little bit as well)

So, first off, I'm not gonna talk about the little grammar things here and there. I'm fairly certain you know of them.

The real meat of me, Inky Jay, making this comment is in your slow buildup of balance. Myself and writing partner Lapis-Lazuli have written story-based clop before ourselves and I'm happy to see that someone else realizes that not only can it be done, but that it can be done well. You've perfectly hooked with the sex aspect, and within three chapters, I can see more and more actual character ship dynamism being developed. You've not abandoned the smexy bits for character development, instead just adding more in as time goes by. I hope to see this culminate in an adorably hot ship, and you have my thanks, respect, and regard for having created a story that has fantastic clop material, but doesn't feel as though it needs that material to be a good story.

Cheers,
Inky Jay

im loving this sotry so damn much, its really interesting and i like how it explores them and what their like together, pls keep going its great

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