Teenage cheerleader Star Flare being found dead near a dumpster is not the typical way to end up back at your high school. Private returns to his school to find that the young cheerleader was found dead with a filly in the dumpster. Who's filly is it? Who killed her? And what does the strange Bat Pony floating around school have to do with all this? Private will soon find this school holds a lot more dark secrets then he remembers.
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High School Cliques.... The horror. The absolute horror and tackiness....
Why do I have a feeling that there's going to be prejudice against batponies in this story?
Also, Supernatural and Criminal Minds, both very good shows!
Good start and also poor Private, mistaken as a TV character. Should be interesting to see how the Batponies fit in besides the prejudice already seen.
Interesting first chapter, and now I'm wondering who Private would be in Supernatural.
This ones gonna be sweet
Sweet. New story. Great job. I guess this is happening when Rarity is learning about Generosity. Good luck with the next chapter. I do hope Potso find his love.
Huh, I'm surprised none of you have made the connection yet...oh well.
5300038 Dean. Duh.
5301693 Well, I might normally think that, but he has a trenchcoat like Cas. But I would always imagine Cas to be a Pegasus or an Alicorn.
Is it bad that I'm imagining Twilight as Sam now? (damn Wincest)
5301737 Not really. Sam is the more studious type.
5301604 Could you care to tell me what's this connection?
5301604
Do you mean the connection with case 5 (Shadowhoof). I mean, the mention of a batpony in the last case's epilogue, the batpony who saved Private from Scarlet in case 5 was in Manehatten, the cutie mark ("His cutie mark was showing a pair of slitted eyes, stars in them.") mentioned in case 5 matches with the name (Evenstar) given in case 14's epilogue. Honestly if I'm right I'll be just as surprised that no one made the connection.
5302783 Um, no, the description of Potso's true love
5303162
You mean the description that matches CoCo Pommel.
5303231 yesh
I see so many high school stereotypes coming up, and you've already covered a ton.
And Insight, how did he even get to his rank with how bad of a cop he is?
Great job, can't wait for more.
P.S.
Sorry I'm late, the story never popped up in my notifications even though I'm following.
Huzzah! New Chapter!!
I'm glad your okay. I'm send a message to kitty. I hope everything goes well and thanks for the update.
I bet Field Goal DID do it but Guidelines is framing him because they're both racist assholes.
The consullor's an ass that's for sure. I am more interested in how Evenstar knew Flare if at all.
5485029
5485412
Well, what did you expect? Racism and prejudice is a recurring theme in this series. I knew for a fact there was going to be prejudice against this batpony at the very beginning.
Coco, what could she have to do with this?
That's new. Okay for fact one. Even isn't that father of the foal. Fact 2: Field Goal was that the murder scene. Fact 3: The counsel is repeating the same phrases to different students.
Fact 4: Private just piss offed Insight.
Great chapter as usual. Thanks for the quick update.
Gunnery jumping the gun again? y does this not surprise me...
Coco, she might be involved? Now I'm even more confused about what's going on.
How is it that Insight is still chief? He's been shown up by Private what...like three or four times now and has been proven to be a complete incompetent in some very public arenas, usually by virtue of publicly announcing so-and-so is the killer and the case is solved only for Private to come in and prove him completely wrong...multiple times. Even if he's pretty good at playing the politics game, there's no real reason anybody would want this jerk in charge after he's publicly dropped the ball so many times.
5536383 Insight may be an incompetent, but he is not an idiot, contrary to his actions. from past information, he appears to be ex-military, most likely of middling rank and used to a world where if u think someone might be the bad guy, chances r fairly good that ud be right. that same attitude doesnt always work in the Police Force...as the situations r rarely that clean cut. in time, Insight could become the 'great leader and officer of the law' that he fancies himself to be now...but in order for him to be sacked, he cant just be a screwup, hed have to really break a law or six, and hes only done that once so far, trying to arrest Twilight.
The plot doth thicken...
I know everyone else is wondering how coco is involved, but I'm more into the fact the private told off that ass of a chief like a boss!
we will get another chapter at some point...yes?
Whoo, been long time since reading this good as it's been before. Now... Coco Pommel being involved? Has this case taken a turn for the crazy? Or has it taken a strange turn to something else... But if there's one thing that's worth it in this chapter, it's seeing Private do that nice burn to Insight's FACE!
OH SHIT.
Wow. That is crazy. Thanks for the update. I guess now we will see who the mom is. Also great job with the Coco and Posto romance. I hope to read about that soon enough. Great job and I can't wait for another chapter. I'll say this, you blew my mind with that.
Whoa...wasn't expecting that
5750691
Indeed.
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Damn wasn't expecting the results to go that way, wonderful job on the twist there. Also good job on progressing the possible couple of Posto and Coco, probably would make for a good side story.
ahhhhhh finally something to banish my boredom away great story can't wait for the next chapter
Again Private? Oh well, I think this might be another pairing match made by the famous Private Eye, soldier of love. Pairing up another one of his friends.
It's nice to see how this story has gone, and still glad that Forceps also has a good opinion of Private, and a really low opinion of Insight. Heck I'm pretty sure everyone by now has a low opinion of Insight, but we'll see what happens next.
So a new chapter eh?
I like this Evenstar guy! He's got spunk!
No doubt about that Darkstar but I'm more interested in how Field Goal fits in to all this
true....but there's also that secretary that seems mighty suspicious as well
True true..... Keep an eye on the conspiracy building this time around Darky. We may be in for a shocker
I can just see Private calling Twilight and Twilight barging in and yelling at Insight saying " either you release my husband or I will personally land you a nice vacation on the moon!"
5759259
In all honesty I can almost see that phrase being shouted by Luna, except without the husband part.
curse you and you're cliffhangers! curse you!!
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Sweet idea for the culprit to use. I like the mind altering magic part. I hope the epilogue will show Twilight's reaction to Even. Guess that means Even will be appearing in the next few cases. Great job. Thanks for the quicker update. Have a great day.
...Stiiiiillll waiting for Insight to get that pinkslip.
I knew early on Guideline had to be involved somehow and it was interesting seeing what her method was and how she used it to do what she did.
As much as the looming events sound interesting and ominous, I enjoyed more seeing the second meeting of Coco and Potso.
5825060
I'll have to agree there... here's hoping for either a story with those two as the main characters, (Because why NOT Potso as a main character?) But so far it's going to be an interesting tale... though I still enjoyed Evenstar's reaction.
5829159 saw it coming myself, Evenstar is a male, hes a teenager, and he just saw a fairly preatty girl...im surprised we didnt get a batpony wingboner....
5824049 i wouldnt hold my breath on that one...