Best of Intentions
The door to the condo opened much too abruptly for Crystal to have time to properly react. Velvet watched from the doorway as Crystal flailed her forelegs in a vain attempt to stop the pages she had strewn across the floor from flying away at the sudden gust of air.
When the initial panic dissipated, Crystal caught the papers in her magic and shot the grinning Velvet a glare. "You could knock first!"
Velvet grinned wider. "I live here!"
"Is that so!" Crystal huffed while she tried to sort the papers between story notes and wedding ideas. "Well, lately, you certainly could have fooled me."
The hairs around Velvet's neck and shoulders bristled as she snapped, "Hey! You're the one who convinced me to join this company. They're a lot more serious than the Canterlot Ballet. But, you know, work hard, play hard, right?" She snorted. "I've been doing both, so, yeah, I've been gone, but I'm still gonna let myself in like I live here."
Crystal finished putting the last paper in its proper stack and sighed. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I am happy to see you. I'm just so distracted right now." She glanced up at Velvet with a shy smile. "We've set a date."
That seemed to pull Velvet right out of her little fit. "What?!" Her ears perked straight up and her eyes went wide. "Seriously? When?"
"Two weeks before Hearth's Warming." Crystal giggled when Velvet gasped. "I know!"
Velvet hopped from one hoof to the other, a grin spreading across her lips. "Crystal, that's just four months away! Oh my gosh, you're getting married in four months!" She paused, then relaxed her posture as her head cocked to the side. "Why so soon?"
Crystal twiddled her hooves while heat filled her cheeks and she mumbled, "So we can go on our honeymoon for Hearth's Warming and start the new year together as husband and wife. Like a new chapter in our story. Or the ending of this one and the start of the sequel, I don't know, but it's—"
"Sickeningly cute and totally appropriate for you, jeeze." Velvet laughed and waved a hoof. "Okay, so what can I help with?"
After taking a breath, holding it, and slowly exhaling, Crystal smiled up at her. "We had fun when you got me spun up about it a few months ago, but it's time to be serious. I need to schedule time with your parents to talk about the cake. I am going to go by the palace this afternoon to meet with Raven and then Willow." Her ears wiggled as she added, "Luna wants to throw a wedding shower, but thankfully all I have to do is nod and smile, because Luna and Willow are working on the arrangements."
Velvet nodded slowly. "That all sounds great, but what can I do?"
"Well, for starters, I don't know if we formally discussed the matter of my bridesmares."
"Uh-huh," Velvet said, eyeing her with playful suspicion. "What about it?"
Crystal giggled. "You are, without a doubt, my mare of honor, of course."
Velvet stuck her nose in the air. "Of course."
"I don't know how many groomstallions Silent plans to have. I presume Winterspear will be his best mare. It's safe to assume Runic will be one of his groomstallions. Perhaps Iridescence, as well? I'm not sure, but he'll have two for certain." Crystal tapped her hoof idly against the floor. "Obviously, I would ask Horsey to be my first bridesmare."
"Obviously," Velvet repeated while she started to pace in a circle. "You were in Raven's wedding, too, though. Isn't it, like, customary to return the favor or whatever?"
Crystal bobbed her head. "Raven could be my counterpart for Iridescence. If he asked for a fourth pony, then Painted would be my next choice." She raised a hoof to hide her frown. "Is it sad that I can't imagine who else he would ask?"
Velvet shrugged and sat by the piles, glanced them over to discern which was which, and picked up the top sheet from the wedding stack. "Not really. He's not exactly Mr. Sociable. Hmm, a string quartet? Your parents would probably know somepony for that?"
"Ugh." Crystal dropped her head forward to bury her face against her hooves. "I can't even think about them right now. Especially not my mother."
"What happened this time?" Velvet tossed the paper over her shoulder to replace it with another. "You did a marriage carriage for Horsey's wedding. You can't do one for your own, too."
Crystal paused, then huffed softly. "My mother gave me my grandparents' address."
Velvet's gaze flicked upward in thought while her head bobbed. "Yeah, it would probably be good to get them involved. Your granddad is pretty wealthy, right?"
"Not my father's parents," Crystal corrected, not looking at her.
There was a pause before Velvet jolted upright. "Wait, what?! I didn't know your mother had parents!"
A bubble of laughter escaped Crystal. "Of course she did—er, does! Where do you think she came from?"
"I dunno!" Velvet's brow shot up. "I just kind of assumed there was a garden party in Canterlot and—poof!—she was there. So, like, who are they? What are they like?"
Crystal shook her head. "I have no idea. All I have is their address and that they live in Chicagoat. And that neither of my parents are fond of them."
"So..." Velvet grinned. "Isn't that all the more reason to meet them? The enemy of your enemy and all that?" She lowered her gaze to the paper in her hoof. "Really? A bouquet of just roses?"
"I like roses!" Crystal snapped back, then sighed. "I don't know. If my parents don't like them, that can't bode well, can it?"
Velvet shrugged, tossed the notes, and grabbed a new one. "Oh, my."
Crystal's ears twitched as she leaned over to try to peer at the writing. "What?"
"This is in the wrong pile, unless you intend to turn this wedding into a show." Velvet laughed when the paper was ripped from her hoof and crumpled up, Crystal's face turning bright red.
"Wrong pile!" Crystal squeaked, wrapping her magic around both stacks and lifting them into the air as she stood up. "I can take care of looking through these, thank you very much!"
Velvet snatched a hooffull of papers and bounded to the far side of the living room. "Aw, come on, it's been a while since you went into a writing frenzy!" She grinned at the glare sent her way and looked at the first page. "Seriously, these are all really lovey-dovey and steamy. What did I miss?"
Crystal maintained her glare a moment longer before her expression fell into a shy smile. "We talked. About the things we weren't talking about. He's going to try to keep regular hours when he can help it, and I'm going to stop going to social events."
"What?!" Velvet dropped the pages. "Seriously?! Oh, thank Celestia for that! How was that decided?"
Quietly, Crystal mumbled, "I wasn't aware that he wasn't aware why I was doing it, and when he asked why, I realized that I was making assumptions. All right?"
Velvet laughed and shook her head. "You are hopeless!"
Crystal's magic retrieved the forgotten papers, put them with the rest, and she turned toward her bedroom. "I am not hopeless! At least, not anymore. So there! Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a wedding to plan."
---
"A rose garden?" Raven peered at Crystal over her glasses, then flashed a smile that verged on a smirk. "As you wish."
Crystal blinked. "What? What? No, I was just, we're just talking, Raven."
"Hmm?" Raven's gaze was fixated on her planner, her magic gripping a pencil that scribbled down some notes. "I'm sorry, Crystal. You'll have to speak up. I can't hear you over the sound of your dreams coming true."
"Raven..."
"Let's see, I'm sure if I talk to Princess Celestia, she won't mind approving the changes to the garden area. Temporarily, of course."
Crystal lifted a plaintive hoof. "Raven, stop."
Raven dismissed her with a click of her tongue. "Tut, tut. Crystal, you seem to be forgetting something very important." Her planner snapped shut and she looked up at Crystal with a smile. "If it weren't for you, I likely would never have found Moore. I at least owe you a rose garden for your wedding."
"In four months?" Crystal's brow raised. "In winter?"
"It's just for one day. Both princesses have made special arrangements with the local weather team to bring some sun to the castle grounds in the past. Why not for a wedding?" She stopped where the hall met the entrance to Princess Luna's wing. "And here you are. Willowy is waiting for you in her office. The wing is still being renovated, so mind your step." Her magic brought over a hard hat and set it on Crystal's head. "The hall should be clear of debris, but it doesn't hurt to be safe."
Crystal laughed and looped a foreleg around Raven's neck to pull her in for a hug. "Don't stress yourself over it if the rose garden can't work out. I was honestly just rambling. You're one of the best planners and coordinators I know, so I'm sure whatever you put together will be perfect."
"Oh, it will be." Raven laughed softly, returning the hug with a tight squeeze. "Don't you worry about that. I'll handle everything on the list you gave me, you can count on that!"
"Just try to remember the budget, too!" Crystal teased before turning to trot off into Luna's wing. Things were really coming along in the renovation project to give Luna bigger quarters and an audience chamber of her own, but there was still a ways to go before it was complete. She giggled to herself. The extra ponies roaming about and literal holes in the walls must have been a headache for Silent and the other guards to manage.
After knocking on the door and being called in, Crystal leaned into the office. "Hi, Willow!"
"Hi, hello, take a seat!" Willow waved a hoof, not lifting her gaze from the paperwork in front of her. "Princess Luna is very excited to know what you thought of her ideas regarding the shower."
Crystal giggled. "Honestly, she is the one putting forth the time and effort. Of course I approve of all of her ideas. I'm just honored and flattered that she wants to do that."
Willow blew a few frazzled tresses of her light pink mane out of her face and glanced up at her. "Yes, yes. I'm sure. You're only a friend of hers and marrying her favorite guard." She sighed, dropped her pencil, and leaned back into her seat. "I'm sorry. We're heading to Haven and I'm trying to get everything in order. I really don't like that place..."
"Really? Why is that?" Crystal leaned in, her ears perked with interest. "Silent doesn't talk about it much."
"I suppose that means I shouldn't, either, but oh well." Willow offered a light smile. "It's all inside a mountain, so there's no natural light. The princess spends all her time there in a place I can't go, and the nox ponies there have—well, how to put it—their culture is a little different. Sometimes I wish I could just stay here, but that would be shirking my duties."
Crystal hummed thoughtfully, then giggled and waved a hoof. "Sorry, I'll stay on topic so you can get back to work. The shower. I've brought the guest list that I can think of," she said as she retrieved the folded paper from her satchel. "Luna is, of course, free to add or remove any as she sees fit."
Willow just nodded for a moment. Finally, she smiled. "What sort of food should be served? I don't think that was on the princess's list, but it's important nonetheless. The castle staff will cater, and we have chefs specialized in all types and styles of cuisine."
"What? Oh! Well." She shifted her hooves, her gaze darting away. "Silent is fond of summer vegetables. I like most pasta dishes, myself. But given the time of year, I suppose something seasonally appropriate as well? Sweet rolls and mulled cider?"
Willow's lips wriggled as she struggled against a laugh. "I'm not sure Itailian, sweet rolls, and mulled cider mix at all."
Crystal sighed. "I suppose not. Well, I'm not too picky, and neither is Silent. Perhaps let Luna decide the menu, and ask her to pick her favorite food. She is the host, after all, so she should get to treat herself."
"I'll see what I can do." After a tentative pause, her ears flicked and she tilted her head. "Say, is there anything I can help with for the wedding? I can easily find time in my schedule if so. We are almost done with the final details for the princess's Nightmare Night party, and that aside, I'll have a lot of time on my hooves in Haven."
Crystal hesitated and tapped one hoof against her thigh, her gaze wandering the office before she looked back at Willow. "Do you think your extraordinary ability to manage time would work with seating arrangements?"
Willow shrugged. "I don't know, but I can give it a shot!"
"All right." Crystal nodded and smiled. "I will get started on the guest list for the wedding right away and give it to Raven to send to you, along with the notes on familial strife to mitigate."
"Challenge accepted," Willow said, extending a hoof and continuing as Crystal shook it, "I will devise the optimal seating arrangement for minimal tension between your guests. Or we'll find out I'm no good at it and your reception is a complete disaster." She grinned lightly. "I would estimate the chance at sixty percent right now!"
Crystal laughed, albeit a little strained. "I hope, at least, the sixty is in favor of the former."
---
Standing outside of her parents' house, Crystal took a deep breath in and slowly released it before she knocked on the door. She counted the passing of seconds in her head and once she reached six, the door opened.
"Oh, darling, hello," Upper Crust said with a light smile. "Please, do come in."
"Hi, Mom." Crystal paused just inside the door to hang her satchel on a hook, wiped her hooves on the mat, and started toward the couch. "Hi, Dad."
Jet Set lowered his newspaper to look up from where he sat in the recliner. "Hello, dear! How are you?"
Crystal flashed him a smile. "I'm fine. Just running around Canterlot trying to get everything in order for the wedding that I can today."
Upper Crust seated herself on the loveseat and peered at Crystal. "Does this mean you have officially set a date, then?"
"Yes, Mom." Crystal shifted on the couch, her gaze flickering between them. "Two weeks before Hearth's Warming."
The eyes and ears of both her parents reacted, going wide and shooting up, respectively. They looked at one another, then back at her.
"Darling, you do realize that's in four months, right?" Upper Crust pawed at the air in her direction. "Is there something you need to tell us? Something that might explain the rush? You can be honest with us, you know."
Jet Set nodded. "It's not completely unheard of these days, after all."
Crystal's smile grew harder to maintain under the weight of their stares. "Dad, Mom, no! I'm not pregnant!" Her mother breathed a sigh of relief. "It's because—well, it's for several reasons, but the most important of which being that we're ready to be married." One of her ears twitched. "Of course, with things being somewhat short notice, a few items on the list are tricky to manage while staying within budget."
Upper Crust blinked. "Within budget? But, darling, we haven't even discussed that."
Crystal blinked back. "Discussed what?"
"The budget, of course." After a moment of awkward silence, Upper Crust chortled behind one hoof. "Oh, my! No! You thought you would pay for this wedding? No, no, no, darling, what a silly notion! You're only going to have one wedding, and you don't want it to be one that you can afford, do you?"
Crystal's gut reaction was to bristle and snap back, and though she was sure her expression gave those feelings away, she did her best to calmly reply, "Well, Mother, what do you suggest instead, then?"
Upper Crust looked over at Jet Set, mirth in her voice as she explained, "Your father and I will pay for everything, of course. It's only proper as the parents of the bride."
Jet Set folded up his newspaper that he had been trying to still give attention, tossed it on the coffee table, and smiled at Crystal. "Sweetheart, you're our only daughter. We only want the very best for you, especially on your special day. Please let us do this?"
The proposal tore her feelings in twain and she just stared at them for a quiet few moments. Control of the budget implied control of the wedding, but a bigger budget meant a bigger wedding. Did she really need the extra bits, though? Wasn't what she planned good enough for them? Her ears slowly folded back. A wedding at the castle did generally imply the kitchen there would cater, but that was financially out of reach, unless—
"All right." Crystal swallowed and forced a smile. "I suppose that is how it is normally done, isn't it? Who am I to say no to tradition?"
Upper Crust clapped her hooves together. "Wonderful! Now, tell me what you've already done so we can decide if it would be better to reconsider your choices made under a tight budget. You want this to be perfect, don't you?"
Judging by the look in her mother's eyes and the irritation rising in her chest, Crystal was certain she had just made a deal that she was most definitely going to regret.
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Crystal maybe you shouldn't have mentioned it to your mother. It won't end well.
...
:velvet: I thought she was summoned fully formed by some archaic social function that got out of control.
Since I am commenting as I read, I hadn't got to that line yet...
As long as they don't forget to set a patrol for rogue pegasi it should work out. We still have that dangling "they come to me for inclement weather" waiting to be used. A scheduled blizzard during Crystal's wedding would use that nicely.
Hello book idea.
Moonshine, moon cheese, mooncake, moon rock candy...
And Upper Crust jumped upon a loveseat and said "Darling, let me tell you what."
"I guess you didn't know it, but I'm a great event planner, too.
And if you'd care to take assistance I'll make a deal with you.
Now you plan a pretty good wedding, darling, but give me my due.
I'll bet a carriage of gold against your plan 'cause I've only the best intentions for you.
6620654
And Crystal said, "Well mother, I guess you're feeling kind...
I'll take you up on your offer,
though I must be out of my mind!"
I dun think it'll be that bad. She already told her once that she is happy with how things are, so I don't see why she can't do it again, if Upper Crust tries something. Plus, planning that event together may do something good for their relationship
New vocabulary added: plaintive
Oh. Oh, Crystal.
youshouldnthavedonethat.jpg
Why this chapter title is not Velvet Nightmare?
Luckily, I was able to find footage of Crystal's exact reaction on the inside. Her inner voice in this scene shall be played by Wil Arnet, who was willing to work for the money we offered:
I had to put this chapter down partway through for reasons, which gave me a chance to mull it over before finishing. And naturally my thoughts spiraled off on a tangent of potentialities.
The wedding is being at least partially overseen by both personal aides to the princesses, and apparently that means the palace is going to be going out of its way for Crystal. (A rose garden two weeks before winter? No problem!) Just for that reason this is shaping up to be a premier social event. And since the guest list is going to be overseen by a number of important ponies - including Upper Crust (Crystal's not getting out of that one) - I bet that a number of loosely-related but very important ponies will get invites.
So Fancy Pants will probably be there. And - this may be a stretch - Au by association with her father.
Au spends the entire wedding miserable because everyone is making a huge deal over this "nobody of some officer's wife" while she, an heiress to one of the most influencial ponies around, has become more and more ignored. Mostly out of frustration, she confronts Crystal and demands to know how this is possible, which results in a very frank, one-sided talk about how friends are won and lost.
...
...
I need help, don't I?
6620613
With Willowy and Raven (and theoretically both princesses by proximity) involved, I think 6620758 's actually correct. I don't know how much strong arming Crusty can do against both of the princesses' aides, who want what Crystal wants, not what Crusty thinks Crystal "deserves."
6620887
You underestimate Crust's ability to make life a living hell.
6620907
You never know, Upper Crust might be able to rise above her past actions for her daughter's wedding.
Ahh, I get it.
You know, I can imagine a few more possibilities for Silent's side of the party depending on how much of the guard might be involved or invited. Sunny for one, maybe even Shining.
That's honestly not a bad assumption.
Nice. Sometimes, it actually is who you know.
This renovation is never going to end. (INB4 it's a significant plot point that blindsides us all. Construction company assassins? Nah.)
There's an important lesson here about delegating tasks to people you know to be competent and that you can trust to get the job done. Having both of the royal schedule wranglers helping out is kind of a big plus.
I suspect they were completely not fooled at all regarding the implications of Crystal's comment about Silent being home late for dinner.
Nice. No kidding regarding who is going to have deeper pockets for wedding funds.
Given who is already helping out with the planning and where the wedding is likely to be, Upper Crust might just be a little surprised about the decisions that have already been made.
One usually dont know they are making a deal with a devil untill after the deal has been made...
Well. It seems Raven and Willowy are gonna have a fun time brainstorming up Crystal's wedding. And I think Luna will probibly come and double the fun -snickers- Anyway It was an interesting chapter, its good to see Velvet being Velvet at the start. And Velvet is right, Crystal is hopeless. I can see why Willow dont like being in Haven due to no natural light but it aint all bad. anyway cant wait for the next chapter, to see what sort of craziness Crystal's mom pulls.
6620887 If Au shows up there, its gonna turn into a ballroom blitz.... Wich will be funny and sad at the same time
The real question is, will Upper Crust be a controlling b****
6621013
So true but I'm not expecting it. Hoping but not expecting.
i estimate the results for this wedding being a rounding success or awful failure are about fifty-fifty. I'm sure this wedding will go great, even if the dragon lady will be running it. Although I do think there might just be a few close calls.
Fourth wall breach combined with a possible hint?
6621044
6621048
abacademics.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/snickers.jpg
I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself after typing "snickers" in google image.
6621062
Just tossing a thought out here, you never know, Upper Crust might be a deeper character than she appears at first glance. I believe she may rise to the occasion for Crystal's wedding.
Seriously? 4 months would have drive me insane, we had to wait 3 months and only because it was a holiday weekend and we both had school off.
HAHA! that's how I think of a lot of people
Also, Chicagoat? really?
great line, it made me smile
NOO!! CRYSTAL! SAY NO TO YOUR MOM!!
Darn, what a tense moment being built up culminating in a definite mistake.
Darn these wedding chapters...now I'm getting nostalgic !
6621317 You have no idea how accurate that is for me right now. I aint ate all day. so i was pretty hungry while writing that.
Yeah. She is going to regret this. Great chapter. Thanks for the update.
Raven, this is why I like you. You snark so darn well when you want to.
Ohhh boy. The parents strike again.
6621390 I know she is a deeper character than that XD. I was saying the same thing that you said, admittedly less eloquently.
6621854
It's all good, when we only see a slice of Upper Crust's life, missing what a deep character she is isn't surprising at all. I predict a rise in her popularity in 30 chapters or less or your money back.
If it hadn't been for an unexpected delivery of some new insight in recent chapters I would also still be tossing her aside in favor of other ponies.
You planned this all along now!
Crystal takes a deep breath and lets out a long sigh "Uhm, mom, Princess Celestia offered to make me a rose garden in the castle, and Princess Luna is planning my shower."
"Thats nice dear, but I think we can do better."
6621200 True enough, with stuff like time spiral and tarkir around time isn't quite as relevant...
and thanks! its Princess Antares' cutie mark and if you now who that is then I love you
Well, given what we've seen and know about Crystal's parents, Velvet is probably correct.
The parents (well, mainly Upper Crust) that you always feel annoyance/irritation toward? Personally, I think Velvet is right - the enemy of my enemy is my friend. Could Upper Crust's parents actually be awful? Yes, but given that I don't like Upper Crust (and Jet Set is ok I guess) I will give bonus points to her parents until I meet them. Heck, I like Jet Set's parents better than Jet Set and Upper Crust and we've only had a tiny scene with them and they are supposed to be super rich snobs.
Perfect for who?
Well, Upper Crust has only shown herself to do what SHE thinks is best for Crystal. Sure, you can say any parent wants what's best for their children, but the good ones know when to give some space. Upper Crust hasn't shown that to me. I feel like Crystal can say goodbye to everything she thinks is romantic about the wedding (like roses). Upper Crust has already shown a distaste for Crystal's romance novels (unless that changed and I didn't notice).
6620613 6620800 6620879 6621062 6621666 Okay, Posted already made the joke but I was planning to anyway so here goes.
I don't know what you all are talking about... It's clear that Upper Crust has only the—*puts on sunglasses*—best of intentions.
YYEAAHHHH
6620654 Hahah! You and Velvet think alike, it seems! And oh gosh. I love that song, now I love it even more.
6620758 I like your optimism!
6620821 Because... I decided not to!
6620879 Hahah, yes! By the way, I haven't forgotten your PM. I've just not had the time to dedicate to sitting down and reading all of it yet.
6620887 I love your tangental rants. They make me feel like I'm failing as a story planner... though that doesn't mean you are or aren't on to something, but nonetheless.
I think all of your logic holds up!
6621016 I thought myself clever! Very clever. I was bragging to all my friends. (So, you know, like, four people.) Sunny and Shining are definitely great options! Regarding Raven and Willow... Their useful skillsets/roles in this chapter had honestly never occurred to me until I think the previous chapter. I never planned for her friendships to pan out so well, but I'm very pleased with it.
6621413 Hah! Time has different meaning to different people, that's for sure. And yes, Chicagoat! I spent probably about an hour coming up with every equine pun I could for Chicago. I had some really obscure words in there, too. Chicagoat was the one I liked the sound of the most, even though in spelling it looks more like Chica-goat instead of Chicag-oat, but... eh. I like the sound of it.
6621786 Raven does have some fun sass to her.
It excites me that she's going to be getting some more spotlight again!
6621904 To be honest, I thought of it literally as I was writing. I looked at my screen, looked over at Anzel, and giggled as I read it to him. It made me feel so brilliant! And... hahaha. Something like that!
6622109
While Upper Crust may not be topping any popularity charts, don't toss her aside just yet. Don't let her crusty exterior put you off, it's only a slice of the pony she is. Deep down she may be more familiar and relatable than you think.
6622109 Oops, missed you in the roundup! But hah! Someone is not an Upper Crust / Jet Set fan, eh?
Well, at the least, we'll be meeting the mysterious grandparents in the next chapter. 
And oh, do they have a story to tell!
6622148
We shall see.
6622155
6620907
I was going to say that Crusty can't possibly have that much sway over Raven and Willowy, who are legitimately on top of the high society pole by virtue of Princess-ly proximity. Buuuuuuuuuut... then I remembered that Crusty can cut out the middle mare and just browbeat Crystal herself.
6621048
6622138
Wait, what? 'Cause I have a nasty habit of taking others' ideas and then running off on my own with them? You shouldn't. it's just what happens when active imaginations collide.
Honestly, that idea was the more mundane of the two I had. The other, which I feel may be more likely because I doubt Au would actually make it on the guest list after her last stunt, was that Au, learning about the wedding - and her exclusion - from her father, goes all distraught. She then drunkenly crashes the reception afterward and makes an absolute fool of herself (and thereby truly hitting rock bottom).
Buuuuuuuut... (there it is again!) ...I really hope Crystal's wedding isn't marred by something like that.
6622791 In my weak defense, I think I was in the middle of writing out responses when you posted your comment, so... so it wasn't intentional!
6622991 Oh, don't mind me, I was just being playfully self-deprecating, which I don't think is healthy but I do it nonetheless.
I do actually have some plans for Au in that regard, but nothing nearly as elaborate. Her time will come... Oh, yes, her time will come. 
6623804
A little self deprecation is a good thing. We should never take anything too seriously; even ourselves. So carry on.
*Au looks at the clock* "Four forty seven?! NOOOOOOoooooooooooo...!!!!!"
Also, every time I Crystal's maternal grandparents are mentioned, I can't help thinking that they live in "Chica Goat." (Best said with a corny Mexican accent.) And now I'm imagining them as horribly stereotypically Hispanic. I know that would drive Jet and Crusty absolutely bonkers.
6623963 Hahaha! Oh, gosh. Well. Yeah, that was one of my reservations about going with "oat" for Chicago... because it looks an awful lot like Chica-Goat and not Chicag-Oat. It was the only one I liked the sound of, though, and had the best resemblance to Chicago. Eh. Ah, well.
Crystal... you dun goofed.
Remember, the worst of things have always been done with the best of intentions.... 
Let's see how this turns out! 
...Is it sadistic how much I'm looking forwards to the almost certain pain and suffering this wedding planning is now going to be for Crystal with her parents now having a proper hoof in things? 
6627391
Haha! Without knowing which of my comments you responeded to I didn't find it odd at all. I do love those word counts.
6623983
Well, it could be populated by goats.
6681799 Haha, no, certainly not on purpose. I've had to do a lot of writing on an iPad as of late with traveling and whatnot, and it is notorious for assuming it knows what I want. That and the little typos are the hardest to spot, since the mind is good at filling in the gaps/making assumptions.
6681895 Typos and missed words are the worst. That's why this guy is my favorite person on the site. He goes through my stuff with a fine tooth comb and has helped me come a ways when it comes to writing.
Reference is greatly appreciated.
Oh, don't worry so much. All you did was essentially make this story's equivalent of a deal with the Devil, nothing could ever possibly go wrong!
derpicdn.net/img/2014/2/4/543440/medium.jpg
Well... almost nothing...