“Miley Hooves? Seriously?” I called up.
Miley clung to the chandelier as it rocked slowly back and forth above Princess Luna’s chambers. “I’m sorry, Sergeant!” she called back.
I flapped my wings to fly up, and offered her my hooves. She chose not to take them and instead hopped off the wrought iron and crystal fixture while throwing her own around my neck.
I grunted as I caught her, then slowly brought her to the ground. “How?”
“There was a mouse. I jumped,” she replied honestly.
I looked at her and then up at the chandelier. That had to be some kind of earth pony record. “You’re afraid of mice, but you’ll fight a changeling?”
“We all have our weaknesses, Sergeant.”
“Okay, fair enough. Back to work, okay?”
She nodded and bounded back to her post. Shaking my head, I returned to my seat at the secretary’s desk.
Princess Luna was in her sitting area with Crystal Wishes and they were both catching up with Iridescence. She was off duty and the group had a lot to talk about. I wasn’t paying attention. Call it a professional talent.
I went back to drawing. Occasionally, I drew Miley but to be fair, most of my drawings of her were documenting the pony’s bad luck. I had drawn her stuck in the couch, stuck in the door, stuck in the… let me just say she got stuck in a lot of things.
Today, however, it was Crystal Wishes’s turn. I had probably been paying a bit too much attention to her lately. She was nice to me and very easy on the eyes. But her barn door didn’t seem to swing my way and Velvet Step was one of my friends, so thinking that way was a little awkward. It was still okay to look. No harm there.
The door to Princess Luna’s chamber opened and Lieutenant Haze walked in without knocking. Miley and I straightened to attention. He looked to me and then moved to advance on the princess.
“Sir, can I help you?” I asked, stepping around the desk and blocking him.
The lieutenant looked down his snout but, humorously, had to tilt his head up to me. “I wish to speak to the princess.”
“The princess has an appointment right now, sir. If you like, I can look at her schedule and find an appropriate time,” I suggested.
Lieutenant Haze snorted. “Sergeant, you work for me, not her. You do not keep her schedule and you’re not her secretary. Act like a royal guard. Now move.”
“Yes, sir.” I stepped out of the way and allowed him to pass.
He walked right up to the princess and curtly bowed. “Princess, I would like to discuss the state of your House Guard now and some suggestions I have to improve it.”
Crystal Wishes and Iridescence stared at him wide-eyed as he trotted right over their conversation.
Princess Luna stood up, her regal mane shimmering like the evening sky. “Of course, Lieutenant. As thou canst see, however, we have an appointment right now. If thou wouldst check with Sergeant Knight, we are certain he can find an opening for thee. As we are sure thou art aware, he receiveth a copy of my schedule each day so he can best leverage our security assets. We would have thought thou wouldst receive one, too. In fact, we know this to be true. Perhaps thou shouldst learn to read it?”
The lieutenant took a step back. “Princess… I think it would be best—”
We all caught the look Princess Luna gave him at that moment and he took two more steps back.
“Yes, I think that would be best,” he amended before hastily retreating. “Sergeant, put me in on the next available opening, please,” he called as he sailed by me on his way out of the room.
“Yes, sir!” I replied before opening up Princess Luna’s scheduling book.
“Silent Knight?” Princess Luna called.
“Yes, Princess?”
“We shall not have any openings for at least a week,” she remarked, her voice booming in the room and the hall beyond it.
“Aye, aye, Princess,” I said and started flipping through the book, feeling a little smug. I passed up several openings and penciled the lieutenant in for 15 minutes three weeks from today.
I muttered, “I know who I work for. Do you, you pompous gryphon-flank?” as I looked down where I had written his name.
“What, Sergeant?” Miley asked.
I looked up and around. Had that been out loud? Oh… it had. I had four mares staring at me. Quietly, I closed the princess’s scheduling book and softly clapped my hooves together.
“Flank, Miley. Always go for the flank when engaging a gryphon. Wound their pride first!” I said before returning to my art project.
☾
The heavy bag loomed in front of me. I stood up on my hindlegs and flapped my wings to help keep me upright. I started to batter it with my front hooves, working on my boxing skills. It was a great workout and I really liked to cut loose.
“Is the lieutenant just a jerk or is he really as dumb as he seems?” Iridescence asked me.
We were off duty, but bad-mouthing an officer wasn’t a great idea in general, even if every word was true. “He is new,” I panted as I continued to hit the bag.
Winterspear was next to Iridescence, doing yoga with her. The two had gotten along fairly well after an intense ‘how could you do that to my little brother’ conversation.
My sister said, “That is code for huge gryphon rump.” She evidently wasn’t worried about bad-mouthing somepony else’s officer.
“He sucks all of the fun out of the room,” Iridescence said, holding an impossible pose. She had one hindhoof down, one tucked against her thigh, and her forehooves pressed together. “When is the captain getting back from his honeymoon?”
I dropped down to all fours again and went over to the standing targets. Lining them up, I started bucking them fiercely. “Three... days,” I huffed each time my hindhooves landed.
“I hope Shining Armor sets him straight. He certainly turned you around,” Iridescence said in my direction.
My eyes narrowed in a glare before I bucked the targets harder. That went on a bit longer before I felt like I’d worked hard enough.
Grabbing some water, I came over to the other two. I laid down at the edge of their mats while both them stared at me upside-down. They had managed to get their forehooves beside their heads and their hind ones were stiff and straight up in the air. They looked ridiculous and frankly, the poses weren't very flattering.
“I could push you over right now,” I teased Winterspear.
“You had best not. I like her better than you,” Iridescence said.
“Mares!” I huffed before getting up and heading to the showers.
☾
My shower had run a little long. I had been enjoying the feel of hot water on sore muscles. There wouldn’t be time for a proper lunch but Princess Luna kept snacks in her chambers. Quickly, I trotted down the hall and made a quick right and—crashed right into another guard.
“Ow!” the mare exclaimed. Her coat was the same color as gold and she had the most cheerfully colored yellow-and-orange mane.
I helped her up and stood at attention. “I’m sorry, Lieutenant, I wasn’t being mindful.”
Sunny Day, the lieutenant that replaced Astral Dyke, was what ponies call a perpetual optimist. She was always happy, positive, and cheerful. The word around the palace was that she was also an amazing officer and always took her job 'all the way.'
She waved a hoof. “Oh, you’re fine, Silent Knight. I wasn’t looking where I was going, anyway. I just needed to get some air.”
I remained at attention and nodded. Then I tilted my head. “Air, ma’am? Down in the gym and similar sweat-soaked areas?”
The unicorn laughed, her nose scrunching up a bit. “Figure of speech, Sergeant.” She looked around to see if there were any ponies in ear shot, then leaned in to say in a low voice, “Your lieutenant is frustrating and doesn’t understand what collaboration means. We have an event that includes both princesses soon and he is insisting that we each do our own security plan.”
“That doesn’t make sense, ma’am,” I said. If we did that we’d have guards stumbling over each other.
“Good luck getting him to see it that way,” was her reply but then she smiled. “I shall endeavour to do so, however! He will see the light… or I’ll go tattle on him.” Cheerfully, she trotted on down the hall while I remained at attention. Royal guards typically don’t prance but I’m confident that was the only way Sunny Day moved.
☾
The day before Shining Armor was supposed to return home, I was standing with my squad at our morning meeting. We were just about to rotate off with Sergeant Orchid’s squad and I wanted to get them briefed.
Before I could get started, Lieutenant Haze walked in. We all stood at attention immediately.
“Listen up, ponies!” he called. “I just learned through a friend at the command intelligence group that there is an obsidian dragon located near Canterlot. The brass is worried and I want first crack at the beast. We’ll be heading out immediately to handle it.”
“Sir. Command has assigned us to this duty?” I asked.
“What? No. I just said I learned it from a friend. We’ll be able to get down there and show initiative,” he explained.
I nodded. “So you want all of us to go with you, sir?”
“Yes, this is a dragon! Every one of you.”
“To clarify, you’re ordering every one of us to leave with you to engage the dragon?”
The lieutenant looked at me like I was some kind of idiot. “Yes, Sergeant. You, me, all of these ponies. NOW!”
“I’m glad to hear you say that, sir.”
“That is the spirit,” he replied.
I shifted to face him and stated matter-of-factly, “Lieutenant Haze, I hereby relieve you of command.”
The lieutenant’s jaw dropped. “On what grounds?!”
“Derelictions of duty, issuing illegal orders, misappropriating Royal Guard resources, conduct unbecoming of an officer, inciting mass desertion, unnecessarily endangering lives for personal gain…”
The lieutenant’s face shifted from surprise to impatience to anger. He actually started turning red. Then he did something really foolish. He took a swing at me in front of the whole unit.
I ducked. Then, in one quick move, I punched him in the gut and followed up by sweeping his legs out from under him. He collapsed and while he was trying to catch his breath, I continued, “...assaulting a fellow royal guard, and anything else I can find.”
“Miley, Harvest, take the lieutenant to the stockade while I do the paperwork. Night Frost, go inform Sergeant Orchid that I’m assuming command until the captain returns.”
There was a thunder of “Yes, Sergeant!” and they all set off to do their tasks.
☾
The following morning, I was working quietly in my reclaimed office. There was a knock at the door and then it opened immediately. Captain Shining Armor stepped in and I rose to attention.
“Welcome home, sir!”
“Thank you, Silent Knight. It was a great vacation but I’m honestly glad to get back to work. Everything seems to be running smoothly. Where is the lieutenant?”
“In the stockade, sir,” I replied cheerfully.
“Alright then,” he said before slipping out and closing the door behind him.
It was good to have the captain back.
☾
Not all of my charges against Lieutenant Haze stuck but the damage was done. Even though command has a way of protecting officers, Obsidian Haze still spent more than two days in the stockade. It also became clear to everypony that he had questionable decision-making skills. The final straw was that Princess Luna just plain wasn’t thrilled with him and said so in front of the captain and several other officers.
As such, command gave him a nice, quiet job commanding a supply depot somewhere out west. They also gave me a medal for being brave enough to stand up to him. All of that suited me fine.
The captain was in my office again and I had brought him up to speed on everything that happened in his absence both with my helmet on and off.
“I wasn’t even gone that long!” he complained.
I shrugged. “The palace never waits.”
Shining Armor nodded. “That is true. Listen, I’m going to go personally find a new lieutenant for the unit. I’ve made it abundantly clear to command that we will not be accepting another important pony’s nephew, son, daughter, niece, or love foal. You need somepony that will fit with the culture. Until I find that pony you’re in charge.”
“Yes, sir,” I said.
He turned to leave and then paused. “Any issue with this situation putting Iridescence under your authority?”
“No, sir, that won’t be an issue at all. The job stays first from now on,” I assured him.
The captain nodded, paused for a moment as if to say something, and then shrugged before he left the office.
Alone again. I started to straighten up my desk a bit in preparation for being in command once more. It was something I was starting to enjoy. Would we ever have a decent lieutenant that I could trust?
“Knock knock!” came the cheerful voice of Sunny Day in my doorway.
My body stiffened to attention and I replied, “Come in, ma’am. What can I do for you?”
Sunny pranced in with an extra spring in her step. “Oh, you already did it! At ease, by the way.”
“Pardon?” I asked as I settled into a more casual stance.
“Helping Lieutenant Haze find a new position. I knew he was a silver spoon, arrogant, son of an ‘important pony,’ but I never guessed he would make such a rookie mistake. Especially around a pony like you.”
With a flick of my tail, I asked, “A pony like me?”
Sunny Day approached my desk and set her forehooves on it. She stood and looked down at me. “You’re a tactician, Silent Knight. I’ve kept an eye on you. You’re always six moves ahead.”
I wasn’t exactly sure what to make of what she had said or where she was going with it. “Thank you?”
“Yup!” she practically chirped before hopping back down. “Well played, Sergeant. Looks like it is you and me again when it comes to joint meetings. I’m looking forwards to it.”
“Yes, ma’am…” My eyes followed her as she left. Peering down at the rock Runic had given me, I asked, “What was that about?”
If the rock knew, it wasn’t telling.
That was... fast to get rid of him \o/
It's interesting you end up of SK showing he still does not understand everything around him, I was missing that a bit.
... Dammit. You know, they really should just hand Silent his commission on the merit he's already gained. I'm not going to miss Haze at all. Or... actually, I think I will. He made a great punching bag for Silent. Does that make me a bad pony?
Either way, looks like things are looking up again, and now I'm going to have to think about how many things Miley could possibly get stuck in and wonder what perspective Silent draws those from....
And I must say, I can see this ship coming, and I have to wonder if poor Knight will be the mare of the relationship again..... While I hate to stereotype like that, it's the only way I can think that will say what I want in few enough words. Unless I go with Silent being the Legionnaire while Crystal is the Decurion. Then again, I can totally see her getting frustrated as he misses hints and her hopelessly romantic side ends up being disappointed....
On the upside, Shining Armour's reaction to Haze being in the stockade had me in stitches. You continue to amaze me in creating such an interesting story out of what would usually be mundane happenings around the palace. Though.... Is it bad that I want to stick Cadence and Crystal in a room together to see what happens....? Poor Silent....
Now then, I eagerly await what shenanigans take place at this Big Event and the lead up to it. I also want to state now, so I can say called it without getting a thumbs down later, that I think Shining will say he's found the new Lieutenant and hand Silent a commission.
~The Final Firedancing Fiend, Pyromaniac Extraordinaire (Chief Warrant Officer Grade), The Great Cargo Shipper's 2IC, and Fan of Horsewords (First Class)
Yay the meanie pants is gone! Now onwards to s'mores!
Great chapter. I loved that Silent put him in his place. Good luck with the next chapter.
The reaction Shining had was priceless. It's amazing how many "hints" Silent dropped, too. Probably well knowing they'll bounce off and giving him an excuse to act.
Clearly the next ship shall be Iridescent Crystal.
They can, of course, also invite Luna.
5537211 I'm just going to steal this from someone else.
memecrunch.com/meme/QH04/ship-has-sailed/image.jpg
*read*
*ponder*
*nod*
*deep breath*
OOOOOWNED!
I'm just going to assume that someone saw Spike and panicked. It's funnier that way.
I see what you did there, but this ship shall sail!
Hooray and huzzah! I never liked him anyway. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
5537300
Or, better yet, someone just said something about a dragon in passing and Haze instantly assumed the worst without verifying a single damn thing about it.
5537230
Hmmmm... So many romance possibilities. But where are you going Silent Knight? I can't quite figure it out.
for kicking butt and taking names. And sending do-badders to the stockade!
PWNED
5537500 Why, he's going up to cruising altitude. It's a Pegasus thing.
5537230 I feel like I'm cheating since CW asked me to help edit. Curse you and your chronological head-start! Now everypony knows CW thinks Luna is best pony.
Expect quality time* between Crystal and Runic Phial, innocent readers of romance.
...Or at least an honorable mention for achievements in controlled explosions for science.
As a Mythbuster once said:
*He likes rocks, she's named after a rock, it's a match made in Heaven. My mathematical proof here is indisputably correct.
There won't be a triple-taboo tribadic triangle, right?
You know, a lot of the fics I read tend to depict the Royal Guard as being structured fairly similarly to how the British Army was during the Napoleonic Wars and subsequent years. If you were of noble blood, you were an officer. If your family was rich and paid enough to sponsor you, officer. It was a rare officer that was raised from the ranks, and with the occasional exception (such as Wellington) it led to incompetent leadership that created more disasters that could have been prevented had an officer been promoted based on skills rather than social standing.
Fun fact; the song 'I Am The Very Model of a Modern Major General' is a satire on the state of the British military command structure of the time, with officers being trained in social graces, mathematics, history, science, but with little to no practical training in tactics or leadership.
Bout damn time that mofo got what was coming to him! Wow another quick chapter update! It seems like SK has found a comfortable groove to run his life in. I think it's interesting that SK likes to draw as I like to draw. We seem to have something in common And that moment with Winterspear and Iridiscence. Oh I can see them hitting it off quite well. Now we all know that SK is looking for a special someone and I am willing to guess this is where he starts to have eyes for either Miley or Crystal...
I wonder when will Silent get promoted to boss. A chapter or two?
That Sunny gal stalks Silent. Oh my gosh, it will be soooo lovely;
I can't imagine how it can end with any other than Silent beeing promoted. The fresh guys from officer school wouldn't dream of join the Lunar Houseguard after what happened to Haze. So Silent is best candidate. I bet 2 princesses would wounching for him. (Shining talks with his wite, I'm sure she has an idea abaut who Silent is... +there's Luna)
A cute, adorable, and well done chapter. Some folks always forget the chain of command.. The really smart ones fear the ones that know the regulations better than they do breathing. The dumb ones, find very 'interesting' new positions open up.
Your description of Sunny Day makes me think of Sunset Shimmer high on the Essence of Pie.
5539674 LOL, thank you for that. Yeah I was worried putting it in but I tried to frame it in a way that made it clear I knew it wasn't funny anymore ;)
5539420 Pretty much dead on there. It was tough to come up with another "sunshine" pony. Sunny has a lighter coat and no red... plus the super-pop sweet personality!
5539092 Like a brand new position in an outpost in the middle of no where... a place where a pony can count cans of corn... and then do it again.
5538958 Sunny is a lot of fun and will continue to be so, I promise ^_^
5538161 Thank you for all the comments! I'm glad to have you along for the story =D Ticket to Ride is actually one of my favorite games ever! My board game lust spills into the story a little bit ;)
5537752 I promise twice a week and I'll deliver! The romance shall be doubled!
5537750 That is a great analogy. I had not considered that but my version of the royal guard is somewhat based on the royal marines (extremely loosely). I've watched a lot of documentaries on the British military over the years. Maybe that came out in the story. Great thought!
5537594 All will be revealed in time!
5537300 Love this idea!
5539710 I figure by the point he's happy with quartermaster, it comes with a healthy side of humble pie, or even more relocation orders to less well known places..
5539739 Next stop: The Moon!
5539755 The view, astounding... The long distance calling rates, atrocious.. Land, cheaper than a buck wheat bit! Just make sure you pack your green thumb..
Sunny Day hmm..
Aand, suddenly this comes into mind: Sunny Skies
meh, its boring
5539860 Such high praise! I'm stoked that you're enjoying the story. Thank you for commenting and reading, I'm really happy to have you along.
5539872 I'm sorry to hear that. It is actually one of my favorite stories. There is a lot of cross over between that one and this one but everyone likes something different and that is totally okay!
You mean something like this that Baroncoon posted in his gallery
http://www.furaffinity.net/full/15528807/
5539710 To be Applejack honest I need to say that she striked me as a plain character as I read it the first time. I assumed she has my least fave type of personality - the idle, kind and good(if not best)-mannered lil' miss perfect who is invisible until something just forces her to do something. A Cadance/Fluttershy kind of personality. It was my first jugdment but after I actually put my brain in chains to work I actually saw that was only the setting that caused that effect. She wasn't there but appeared in a supricely good moment. We just need to see her more to meet her...
I also think that she appeared in the moment Knight is alone to have a 1on1 talk is subspicous. He's a sergeant-workaholic who acts leading officer most of his time. It's unpropable she just found him alone outside of paper job...
5539970 o0 that guy has some good stuff.
Ummm...
Dear Author,
Today I learned that stories tend to run out of chapters at 2:20 AM. Why they do that is beyond me. I suspect they are cruel and like to keep the audience begging for more. When asked I will definitely deny I whined and threw a micro-fit over not having anymore chapters to read.
I also learned that I love the pacing, characters, and nearly everything about this story. You brought back Iridescence in a grand fashion, keep the action fresh and mixed up between important canon events, and we aren't even into the third season yet. Looking into the future, I would love love LOVE to see the forming of Twilight Sparkle's House Guard, even if it would have to be a different story altogether. If anyone, I'd love for you to write it, with all the colorful ponies present.
Yours truly and utterly invested,
Reader
On a different note, you almost woke up my parents at said 2AM. You can't make a person laugh his ass off that far into the night. Shame on you dude. No srsly, I loved Shining's reaction. And how Luna handled the situation. GAH. Can't wait for more. Glad I found another splendid addition to my Unique and Amazing bookshelf. It didn't get fed for quite some time now
Decided to read the chapter again for the heck of it, started thinking Silent Knight would date Sunny Day for a short while. No idea why I'm shipping those 2!
Lmfao, that was awesome!
Silent Knight's memoirs are definitely on my "Must Read" list when it updates. This chapter was most satisfying!
If he's in the mood for great coffee, I hope that he might drop by the True Brew Cafe sometime. A piece of cake or pie is always free to new customers!
Good riddance to bad rubbish, I say.
5543676 No more Haze (ing) for Silent Knight. Bad pun I know!
5543567 Very high praise that is most appreciated! I'll keep the coffee in mind. It is always good to have a destination for the cast to go now and then.
5543153 ;)
5541793 She is a unicorn and we all know he is a uniphile.
5541764 This is, quite possibly, the best comment I've ever received! I aim to please and I'm very happy to have you among my readers. Also, unrelated to all of this, I meant to mention that your avatar rocks.
5539772 She and Celestria are pretty close I'd imagine ;D
5539970 Those are insanely good.
5543720 well that and she has seemed to express some interest in him (beyond just a passing interest in him as a guard, or I could just be reading a subtext that isn't there). Even though his rank is objectively lower than hers they are also in different guard units so even if they did start a relationship (which for some reason I'm sure will happen in a future chapter) it would have next to no impact on their job performance (aside from possibly influencing their interactions at the regular guard meetings if Knight were to become the official commander of the Night Guard). In all honesty they do seem to compliment each other. He's a serious and somtetimes somber by the book the book (some would even call him a rules lawyer) type and and she's an upbeat type that strikes me as the kind of individual to toss rules out when she feels they are obstructive and probably is more prone to improvising (which in all honesty I see as someone Princess Celestia would prefer in her regular company).
Damn rocks, they never give away their secrets
5551159 You are correct that she is depicted that way. While this particular story is very similar to canon it is Alternate Universe and Cadence being a unicorn is intentional.
5550367 Time will tell on many of your questions! ;D
5549478 Keekoi is awesome and she captured that picture beautifully. It is one of my favorites!
5546898 They do... but only to Runic ;D
Are you planning on shipping Luna with Silent Knight ? I'm kinda lost
5552561 It really isn't much of a spoiler at this point but... No, no intention of that at all.
Hey, Anzel, are you in collab with Crystal Wishes?
5552609 Yes I am =)
5552620 Thought so
5552678 Yes indeed! Our stories occur in the exact same alternate Equestria and time line. Crystal's Wishes starts further in the past than Memoirs obviously. They're actually really close to syncing up though. Maybe another week or two.
5552688 Yeah, Crystal has hers skipping ahead pretty fast, so the stories will be really close in a few weeks.
Hmm....
So many potential love interests!
I'm, of course, still holding out for Iridescence because I'm a stubborn git. Just because they're perfect as friends doesn't mean they can't be perfect as more-than-friends!
This felt like readers digest. I love it
I reiterate: NCOs can make or break you!