• Member Since 26th Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen Jan 21st, 2019


Comments ( 103 )

No cutie mark yet? Bummer dude. :ajsleepy:

I apologize to you all for my poor spelling/grammer, I did this story on my Word Document a very months back and I have a personal habit for being descriptive in what is happening during the story. By the way, when it comes to the dialogue for any members of the Apple family, that's becase of the accent I wanted to write. Example: I = Ah, My = Mah. So... once again I'm sorry for any obivious mistakes that I've made.:ajsleepy:

EPIC I read the 6th and then ta da this appears TOO MUCH TO ENJOY AHHH!


yep he is getting 3-3... i am curious on how they are all going to respond to finding out about each other? but man the GRAMMER:facehoof: cring worthy...

Man that would've been cold! D:

Man, you really need to get a proofreader. I like the concept, but the grammar and stuff makes it almost unbearable.

Alright, I undertand that I have horrible grammer skills! I'm a closet Brony and that I don't know anyone that can help me with that, so I'm sorry about all this.:ajbemused:


grammar, brony . :trollestia:

sorry couldn't resist, did it just for the lulz not to make you mad.

This is quiet interesting so going on my read later list , the CMC are teens i guess, from the cover

Well I thought he would take Scoot's virgin too he didn't rip Scoot's hymen right? Anyway I can't wait to reed more sice here comes the main conflict.

Gowing Up Crusaders YAY!!!!



Go On........ :duck:

More updates YAY! Oh and bigmac is Rock Woohoo

IM SOO JELLY RIGHT NOW! He has a 3-way (haha lol) relationship, that lucky son bitch

512571 There are many bronies online that would be more than willing to proofread for you (I assume). I would offer my own services, but I don't really have the time. I'm not trying to put you down, just offer constructive criticism.

Do i sense a reference to the movie Jumper here?

I wouldn't call Esbin a pimp, persay. The proper term to describe Esbin as a playa.

My four way sense is tingling!

That story is going to be so awkward!


515438 the words flakes not flacks. just saying... also i agree he aint a pimp. a pimp would get the main six and the princesses


First and all i got to say is they should of asked zecora if the gel is sble to hold off that much... becuase the story said they felt it preventing it from going to deep but at the end they did not they just felt it enter...:unsuresweetie: if it was to much then they all may want to worry...

Wow...good job! though the grammar and spelling could be a little better. Still good job!

I agree with BBB but I think Sweetie Belle was lucky that she isn't pregnant becaus I bon't remember she used any protection when she lost her virgin either while Applebloom used pregnancy control pill.

It's good to know even the pearants can have their fun too.


you left the storie slightly open ended. meaning you COULd write a sequel... but this time around PLEASE get a proofreader...:facehoof: the grammerand some spelling was MURDER!!!


also the ending ws no really mature since there was not anything in mature like sex in it meaningit is more around thelines of teen...

517831oh, shut up and enjoy it man!
this was a cool story(with an awful lot of sex:applejackunsure:)
and if there's one thing I agree with you
its the whole open ended thing
now mr author if you dont mind
I am happy to say

Well it seems BBB you were right they rally became pregnant and it seems they really happy. I liked you made an open end so we can imagine how the other ponies reacted the news. Too bad I can't imagine how Princess Celestia reacted to the news because I have the feeling she heared from it.


'Does he have a brother?'
I really had to laugh at this sentence!

I completely agree with an outside sequel and a proofreader, but it isn't his fault really. He is just trying to keep a pace for us readers. Also if you do make a sequel Spades, I would love to be a proofreader, because I don't read many stories with OCs but yours sets a bar for the rest

518568 Her reaction was this. Recives message - Dear Celestia, blah blah blah blah x 200 and you would never guess what hapened with Esbin and his marefriends it turns out that at the 'sleepover' he got all 3 pregnant which is great though I think he was a little unprepaired. Your student Twilight Sparkle. Celestia"Wow Esbin you are very lucky... (a few minutes later) Wait wait wait marefriends!? As in more than one!? He is totaly doomed. Well more for me to laugh at." *picks up quill and paper* Dear Twilight, tell Esbin I said HA HA HA HA YOU ARE SOO SCREWED!! Princess Trollestia. *sends letter*

hey if you need or want a proof reader then i'd be more than happy to.:pinkiehappy:

515438 P.I.M.P. Playa In a Mangement Profession.:moustache:

the story was amazing. i loved it. but i have a few things i'd like to say.
1: try not to make the story awkward with the words "cock" "vagina" etc... try using codenames for them like "marehood" for vaginas and "stallionhood" for cocks
2: grammar seemed a bit off, but i could understand most of it
3: try to use paragraphs more often. i lost track on who was talking sometimes
all in all amazing story. but since it was a clopfic whenever i read clocktower, i read cock tower... :twilightblush:

iv been in that position but i was alone
and they kept telling me i was a lucky SOB

I love this story...does that make me an egg head?:rainbowderp:

you have written a beautiful work here i hope my redo of my fic turns out as good as this one

I was so looking forward to reading this. It's been sitting on my "Read Later" list, waiting for me to find some free time. But the grammar. I don't mean to be rude, but I can't read it like this. Definitely try and find a proofreader.

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