• Member Since 13th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen March 15th

SanityLost


E

After teaching at Ponyville Elementary for many years, Cheerilee has been told that she must retire. As she walks home from the schoolhouse for the last time, she questions whether or not she's made a difference in the world.

A big thanks goes out to Taranasaurus0.0, Criticul, and Fluttrick for thier help prereading and editing this story.

Side Note: No cheesy poem this time!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 37 )

You and your awesome stories.

I still don't understand how you do it. Everything you write is gollllddd <3

505122 I appreciate your enthusiasm Dimondium, I really hope you like the story! This time I hope the story makes you smile instead of cry.

505124 Thanks Baroque! I always appreciate your feedback!

505143 Hehe well I don't know about that crit! As long as I write something that is at least considered bronze I am happy. Remember, if this story does do really well, you were the one that pointed out the big problem I was having with my work to this point. So you were a great help in me writing this.

505170 Criticul is not incorrect. You have talent. Some people here are just fanboys who think themselves Shakespeares.

Others, like you and me, we're the ones who were writing before the fandom, and it really shows.

You know how to make a good story. I would say at least silver if not gold. :pinkiehappy:

505169 Well I went a different direction with this one Dimondium. Instead of doing something sad, I tried to do something happy. I wanted to see how something like that would be recieved. I'm sorry you didn't like it as much as the others, I hope you like my next stories better!

505183 Careful with your quill-waggling, lest you scare the foals, Baroque. :pinkiehappy::heart:

I totally know where the title came from haha, I won't spoil it for others though. :raritywink:

Anyways, great story! I usually don't like stories where all the characters are old, but this is one of very few exceptions! :pinkiehappy:

Keep it up!

505188 The sad tag is there because honestly, there is no Friendship/Comfort tag. That is one thing I wish we had more of on this site, more tags. I have had to mark some stories sad that were not sadfics. They were more "things are bad right now but they will get better" fics.

505209 I'm really honored you enjoyed the stories Strums, I hope I can write more you like! :pinkiehappy:

That was beautiful:pinkiesad2:

I loved it,...

Lovely, truly. This was one of the finer fics I've read recently. The pacing was actually done with pronounced success, which is very uncommon among fan-fics. The emotional aspect of this story might have benefited from a slightly stronger and more varied vocabulary, but otherwise this was a well written piece that has just the right amount of detail and makes me feel very good inside. I aspire to be a teacher one day, and I can only hope one day I feel the same way that Cheerilee does. It's sad to think that by the sounds of poor old Cheerilee that's she's probably not long for the world, but also somewhat rewarding to know that when she finally goes, so many people will remember her as an inspiration to their lives. Character development when very well. I would easily give it a 4/5. Good job!

505336 Thank you Metall, I really do appreciate that!

505449 Heya George, thank you so much for your feedback. I worked on this one to make sure the pacing was pretty good, though I personally felt it moved very quickly. As far as vocabulary goes, I don't have a very large one. I consider myself an "idiot savant" whenever I manage to write a good fiction story (I'm really good with non-fiction). I hardly know anything about grammar, pacing, flow, mechanics or anything like that. I have been told that, by all rights, I should not be a writer.

When I write, the only way I can explain it is, I try to write truthfully. When I envision a situation, I try to imagine how it would go in real life, and I just write that, using metaphore to help the reader connect to the work. I am doing my best to learn about writing though, but from what I see, it's going to take so many years before I can actually be considered a "real writer."

Thank you so much George, I am really happy you enjoyed this peice. On another note, I too wanted to be a teacher, but that path ended up passing me by as I walked a road less traveled.

Daww, My mom is a retired teacher. :twilightsmile:

505505 Then this story is, in part, dedicated to her :pinkiehappy:

505501
Say, I've got a story I'm working on too. It's going to be a long one, and it'll be weeks before I finish it (not including the sequel I have planned for it) but I've got the first 3 of what I estimate to be 8 chapters up, if you'd like to go check it out. I'm working on the 4 chapter now, and I plan to put it up tomorrow. Stop by and give me some feedback when/if you've got time.

It was inspired by "MY Little Dashie", and if you've read it then you'll notice an almost painfully close resemblance between chapter one and the beginning of MLD. This is due to my own ineptitude at writing beginnings. I cannot start things off fresh on my own, for some reason, because I can only expand upon an already existing concept or premise; utterly original work is beyond me. I've literally spent weeks just day dreaming in place about how I can make this story work better, what wrinkles I can iron out, what sub-plots I can put in, etc. It's how I spend most of my free time, and that's a trend that carries on into just about any given topic. I'm very imaginative in the sense that I can just read a story, see a show/movie, even just hear a word and I can start to build around it, and I'll spend hours of days of weeks building around it.. but only after that first seed has been planted in my head.

Good lord I've gone an dawdled significantly, haven't I? well that's the kind of person I am, I don't stop talking until I've said EVERYTHING that I've got to say. Any, look it over quick if you can find the time, and let me know what you think.

Was this possibly influenced by this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYbGQIT4he0
Regardless it's great!

Never I tough Cherilee can be written as a main character in a tear-jerking fic
i.imgur.com/RLBvF.png

Kudos to you, good writer

505501
I'll be checking out your other stories now:pinkiehappy:

505992 It's ironic Joe. I was thinking about that very episode the other day, then I thought about my past teachers, and then I thought about cheerilee. After all that thinking something just clicked, and I decided I wanted to make this story! Thank you though, your praise means a lot to me.

506175 Oh wow, I was just meaning for this story to make people smile. Sorry I made you cry, thank you for reading!

506490 Thank you so much MetallKant, I really appreciate that. I hope you like those as much as you like this one.

506567
Heh...


That's what friends are for, right?
Supporting each other through whatever encounter they come across...

Wow, just wow. That was an amazing little story. So many heartwarming memories for a story that it easily brought a tear to my eye... the good kind of tear though.
You have also earned this:
img.photobucket.com/albums/v146/Gildor_Surion/muffinbutton.png
And thank you for sharing this lovely story with us. :yay:

Yet again with the amazing stories, my good friend.
Keep up the great work.

Awesome story! What makes me happy - you didn't demonize Tiara and Silver Spoon like every single author who writes them. Honestly, peoples can write symphatetic Discord and Chrysalis, but school filly who tends to tease and annoy others liek EVIL IRREDEEMABLE. Sheesh.

But here. well, here's everything just perfect!:ajsmug:

506807 Wow I got a muffin button! I never ever thought I would get one of those! Thank you I am really happy you liked the story.

507247 Thank you Devilblade, again I always appreciate your enthusiasm and encouragement.

507448 That is one of the many problems I have with some of the writers on this site. But that is a conversation for another time. I am really honored that you like my story and I hope I create more that you'll like.

511029
I too flagged the story for its stolen content.

511029
511093

Hey Dimondium and Jokerpony, Thank you very much. That really means a lot to me. You have no idea how much I appreciate this. I am not sure what upsets me more, the fact that this author took my story, or the fact that they took my story, tried to improve it, and then released it. Well, if anything, I learned that I need to be more careful when I write my stories. I have to say that there were some places that they messed up the story because there are certain parts of the narrative that were supposed to get certain feelings across to the reader, and the way this writer rewrote it, the story doesn't do that anymore. Although, I do have to say, that author's use of grammar and word usage is a lot better than mine.

I am honored they would think highly enough of me to copy my work, though.

Thank you guys so much again, it is really touching that you care enough to report someone taking other's ideas. If I saw someone doing that to your work, I would happily do the same for you and keep others from taking your ideas.

That was the greatest shot of glurge I've ever seen.
It's rare that you see a fic that would make a or at least part of a finale episode, but I think this would make a great plot for a 'finale from the future' episode. It shows what everyone has accomplished without being overly forceful by showing every single pony. Instead it sort of makes the viewer 'travel' with Cheerilee as she rediscovers the old cast or monuments to the old cast, and what they've been doing. Because there's no mention of Twilight it makes it a bigger surprise at the end when all the Elements are still around too, so good on that. The monument to archmage Twilight immediately makes one think she's already passed on! Definitely got the gift of writing there sir. :yay:

This story is so sad, :fluttercry: yet so inspiring at the same time. It's so wonderful to her her old students come back, and tell her how much they were insipred by her to become the ponies they are today. I could almost see this Cheerilee as what the one in my fanfics would have grown old to become, if she hadn't got timejacked! :rainbowlaugh: Anyway, keep up the awesome work! :rainbowlaugh:

So sweet. I'm going to uni to teach, and this just makes me want to YAY! But it was a really nice story.

Awwwwww! :yay: This is really wonderful! We need more Cherilee fics! One where, you know, she isn't a vampire.

Not what I expected at all. I came into this looking for a trollfic, and instead found something heartwarming. Better description is needed, but still a good story.

I expected something heart warming and I was not disappointed, good work.

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