This year is fluttershy's turn to have a hearth warming eve party with her friends and one very special friend
Hey everypony iam stoneware am an artist from canterlot.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Really Good So Far, Theres A Few Spelling Mistakes But Other Than That Its Fine Cant Wait For More Chapters
I like can't what for more :)
Wow over 100 views in under 12 hours thank everyone
I am open to any thorghts you have I would love to know what you think :)
'A Gift Of Chaos' is another Fluttercord story I always love coming back to every time.
This was hard for me to read past the beginning. Run-on-sentence after run-on-sentance after run-on-sentence. Paragraphs are made up of multiple sentences, not one really long sentence filled with camas, several of those needed to be periods. Once I got past that error though, the story was good. But run-on-sentences are no bueno
Same thing I said last chapter, good, but almost every "paragraph" is just a run-on-sentence. Also, both chapters had their fair share of grammar errors, misspelling, and in honesty, the story could have been executed better. So it was good, but not the best it could be.
Don't be put down by anything I said though, that just means you have room for improvement and there's nowhere to go but up!
Ok thanks I am still new to this kinda stuff and I am sure I will improve thanks
There are mistakes, but no one is perfect.
*groans* . I only just started reading this and I already found several mistakes.
Delete the second "A" and the elipsis is not needed.
softly
Misty. And this word should be starting a new sentence so replace the comma with a period.
covers
snow
reflects
I'm not even going to finish reading this until you get a proofreader to go over it.
And here's a tip for you. Don't use commas unless you're describing a series of events, items, or actions.
In your second paragraph you have it all as one long sentence interspersed with commas when it should be three seperate sentences.
Also you failed to place a comma before the two instances of the word but which is the only place it was needed.
5262865 A few?!. I had to stop reading at the first paragraph because it was so god awful messed up with gramatical errors that I had to comment on it.
5365196 What he/she said.
Despite all the spelling mistakes, all the gifts for everyone are cute and makes sense. Twilight can't conceive of giving something other than books, can't she? LOL.
6741899
The same with Pinky, don'the they always get cupcakes from there. I'm suprised she didn't change it up and get them, I don't know.....something other than what they can get every day?!? Bookhorse is understandable but Pinkie is un-Pinkie-dictable!
Your English is...um..Hey! Um..was it your first language?
Did that sound rude..?
It did didn't it!
I'm sorry.
Coco Ette?
Some kind
of human
chocolate
perhaps?
(Read using Female British voice)