• Published 7th Nov 2014
  • 7,811 Views, 146 Comments

Exposed! - Majin Syeekoh



Something is hanging out of Twilight.

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Public Indecency

Twilight Sparkle woke up to a chorus of birdsong outside of her window. Her eyelids felt heavy, but Friendship wasn’t going to run itself. With a heavy groan, she pulled her head off of the pillow, scratched her back, and pried her eyes open. She lazily rolled out of bed onto her hooves and grabbed her saddlebags. She then thought about what to do next.

Coffee!

Twilight staggered out of her bedroom and made the long trek to the kitchen. She eyed the refrigerator as she closed in on it, opening it quickly. She scanned the contents.

No, this can’t be!

She perused the insides of the refrigerator again. There was no coffee. She groaned and looked at the cabinets.

I swear, if Spike put the coffee in the cabinets instead of the fridge again…

Twilight opened every single cabinet door and examined each in turn. When she was halfway through, she heard the soft pitter-patter of dragon feet behind her.

“Good morning, Spike,” said Twilight.

“Morning, Twi,” Spike replied as he rubbed his eyes.

Twilight continued to rifle through the cabinets. “Do you know where the coffee is?”

“Oh, we ran out last night.”

Twilight froze. “Last… night?” She turned towards Spike and paced towards him. “What were you doing running out of coffee last night?”

“Oh, RD and I had a coffee drinking contest last night—”

Twilight grabbed Spike’s face and turned it to her. “With my coffee?”

“What, it’s not like you just can’t get more—”

Spike snorted.

Twilight narrowed her eyes. “What’s so funny?”

“Ah, it’s nothing, Twi. Why don’t you just get a cup at Sugarcube Corner?”

Twilight grunted. “That’s an inefficient use of funds! Do you know how much they gouge prices on coffee there?”

Spike giggled and shrugged. “Well, it’s either that or go to Barnyard Bargains and come back to the castle and brew it up yourself.”

“Ugh, I don’t have time for that,” Twilight said as she turned tail and walked away. “Need coffee now.”

“Alright,” Spike said with a stupid smile on his face, “have fun.”

Twilight pressed her eyes shut, then opened them. “I wonder what his problem is. Probably the caffeine overload,” she said as she walked out of the door of her castle.

Outside, she looked upon the wondrous view of Ponyville that her new residence afforded her. She could make out the small shapes of ponies milling about and starting their day. On a normal day, she would walk the trail to town and admire the various flora and fauna along the path.

But not today.

She need her coffee, and she needed it now.

Twilight charged up her horn and teleported to outside of Sugarcube Corner. She smiled as she looked upon the gingerbread-styled residence slash shop. She trotted inside.

Inside was the usual hustle and bustle that came with the early morning rush at Sugarcube Corner—ponies were reading the paper, whispering sweet nothings at each other, or drinking their coffee.

Like I should be.

Twilight shook her head as she walked up to the counter, noticing that a hush had taken over the cozy shop. She approached the counter and rang the bell. Mr. Cake walked out with a smile on his face which quickly turned neutral when he laid eyes on Twilight.

“Hi, uh, Twilight, don’t… normally see you here. What can I get you?”

Twilight glared at Carrot Cake. “Five shot caramel macchiato. Now.

“Uh, right away, Princess Twilight.”

“Just Twilight is fine.”

“Okay,” Carrot said as he went to the back. “Five shot caramel macchiato for the Princess!”

Twilight grunted. She didn’t like how ponies treated her differently just because she was an Alicorn Princess. It made her rather uncomfortable, thank you very much. She closed her eyes to think, but couldn’t because now she could hear hushed whispers.

“She leaves her house like that?”

“How inappropriate!”

“I wonder where I can get that.”

Due to the lack of caffeine and extreme tiredness, she swiveled around and addressed the crowd.

“Look, I was very tired today and I really wanted a cup of coffee. I didn’t have time to shower. I’m sorry that my hair isn’t perfectly straight or one of my coat hairs is out of alignment.”

A yellow pegasus with a seafoam green mane spoke up. “It’s not that, Twilight—”

“—look, Raindrops, I’m a normal pony just like all of you. This is what I look like in the mornings. It’s not pretty.”

“I’ll say,” Raindrops said.

Twilight smiled. “Good. I’m glad we can agree on that.”

“Coffee’s ready!” Pinkie said as she exited the kitchen. “Five shot caramel macchiato for Twilight!”

“Thank you, Pinkie,” Twilight said as she turned back to the counter

“No problem! That’ll be five bits.”

Twilight grunted as she retrieved the five bits from her saddlebag and placed them on the counter. “You should really look into lowering your coffee prices.”

“Can do, Twilight! By the way,” Pinkie said as she leaned in, “your seat belt’s hanging out.”

Twilight blinked. “My… seat belt?”

Pinkie nodded excitedly. “Yep! You miiiight want to look into tucking that in.”

Twilight looked back to see that, yes, her seat belt was indeed hanging out. She looked back among the ponies. “Is… that what you were all talking about?”

The patrons all nodded in agreement.

Twilight blushed and giggled as she tucked her seat belt back in. “Oh, sorry. I usually try to tuck that in when I shower.” Twilight grasped her coffee with her magic and sipped on it awkwardly. “I should probably get going now, hah hah.”

She took another awkward sip, then teleported out of Sugarcube Corner.


Spike chortled as he munched on a topaz.

Wow, I really got her good.

His last crunch was cut short as Twilight appeared in front of him, eyes slitted. She sipped on her coffee.

“At what point were you planning on telling me that my seat belt was hanging out?” she asked as she sipped on her coffee again.

Spike giggled nervously. “You have to admit it was pretty funny, right?”

Author's Note:

It's canon.

Comments ( 140 )

Wat.

...

reactiongifs.us/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/nevermind_nathan_fillion.gif

This gif is getting a lot of use. When does she get her power windows, too? Or power steering? Or a bucket seat?

Twicar confirmed.

Majin Syeekoh
Moderator

5237393 They'll come in the next model.

Glorious. The epitome of seat-belt writing. That's not a thing!

Goddammit.:facehoof:

Next we're going to get one where Twilight gets Hot-rodded. In more ways than one.
:trollestia:

I'd fasten Twilight's seat belt anytime. :duck:

Well, it's not the weirdest thing you've written.

I really, really should have seen that coming. Yet somehow, you got met.

Thank you for flying with Sparkle Airlines. We hope you enjoyed your flight, and we wish you a pleasant evening. Especially you Raindrops, because you got a speaking role.

I confess, I have been wondering why more people haven't written fics about the fact peagsi have seatbelts.

I'm confused...

Am I missing something here?

I'm seriously confused, what do you mean by "seat belt"?

Can I just look it up on Google and get an answer?

Or is Twilight a fucking car?

Majin Syeekoh
Moderator

5237443 Season 4, Episode 1.

5237443 It's an actual seatbelt. I'm assuming that they're all actually cars. At least Twilight is.
EDIT: Neeeever mind.

Her... seat belt? An actual, physical, literal seat belt?

Yeah, I'm confused.

I wonder if Twilight's seat belt is big? Seems like alicorns would have big seat belts.

5237449

Oh shit yeah, I remember! Fucking halrious now that I get it

5237478 And thus light dawns and shines clarity upon me! Thank you!

I had completely forgotten about that joke. Thanks for making me chuckle.

5237443 Watch the episode "Princess Twilight Sparkle," and you'll get it.

Majin Syeekoh
Moderator

Aw man I love this fic! XD

Okay that's funny.

Seeing the E rating I knew it wasn't going to be anything dirty, but I wasn't expecting the seatbelt reference. I was thinking more along the lines of Twilight suffering the morning wood equivalent of a wingboner, and going out in public with it in full view of everyone.

5237393
Nope. Half-Life 3 confirmed.:trollestia:

Majin Syeekoh
Moderator

5237773 Glad to subvert your expectations.:pinkiehappy:

Lucky ponies. If my seat belt is hanging out, I hear infernal, incessant beeps.

This is absolutely disgusting! Such public indecency is NOT to be made light about! Shame on you, sir!

What fun! To be reminded of such gaiety from so many months ago!

Ahem. Have a thumb and a fave.

:rainbowlaugh: Perfect prank by Spike. Spot on.

This amused me. Well done.

Well done. Silly, but well done.

Well done I'm still chuckling.

5237775 No! Team Fortress 3 confirmed!

It costs me nothing to admit I had absolutely no clue what you were talking about until I saw that pic...

Loved it.
~Dollars.

I think that Twilight likes to have passengers, if you know what I mean... :trollestia:

Does she come with GPS?

Take that sentence however you want it.

5238292
Equestria Girls 3 confirmed.

*Sees picture*

The levels of do not want are pretty high.

5238891 Three Tree 3 Confirmed!

Seems legit.

This story is so adorable! Love it! :twilightsmile:

BTW, I really really like your avatar icon. :twilightblush:

Majin Syeekoh
Moderator

5239574 Thanks!

I like yours, too!

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
Majin Syeekoh
Moderator

5239723 I'm glad that I have your approval.

At first I was like "wat?" but then i lolled :rainbowlaugh:

5237412

That needs to be a thing ... I'm now going to write this. And say good by to what's left of my innocence.

5237468
>implying Spike didn't pull those right out of his butt

I honestly wasn't sure where this was going, but it was good for a smile. Also, looking at that a picture at the end of the story, to me, it looks like they're actually coming from Spike's "pockets of infinite holding", not that seat belts coming from his pockets would protect him, but still.

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