• Member Since 11th Oct, 2013
  • offline last seen 4 hours ago

alarajrogers


Okay, I admit it, I'm probably not your mom. But odds are I'm old enough to be. Now with Patreon account (under alarajrogers) and short stories on Amazon (under Alara Rogers).

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Set in Lopoddity's Pandora-verse, where Discord and Twilight had a daughter. Pandora wants to know if draconequuses have their own country. After Discord's attempt to correct her pronounciation is mistaken by Pandora for the name of the country, Discord tells her a bedtime story about the fate of the country Draconequui and all the draconequuses that ungrammatically lived within it. And dad-trolls the heck out of her in general. Written with permission.

(Image is actually from moments after Pandora's hatching, though I may replace it if Lopoddity publishes a Discord-and-Pandora image that seems more apropos.)

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 47 )

Bravo! Bravo!

kudos on your latest assassination attempt on my life, you NEARLY had me this time. i was laughing so hard my husband was about to abjectly ban me from reading your comedy fics without a respirator present. also, i suffered nearly five heart attacks from overdose of D'AAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, that most potent and dangerous of drugs.

I wish Lopoddity would update Mister Discord comic more often :ajsleepy: but otherwise nice one shot.

"How celestia almost destoryed equestria by falling in love with a cake?"

"NOO! WE CAN'T EAT GRANDMA!"

"His name was king stuffy pants the alicorn."

The lines that make this my favorite comedy story ;D
Keep being you, I'll be watching and hoping for more Lols and Dawws :3

Man, I remember Tikki Tikki Tembo! Literally the best story I read when I was a kid! I knew the story sounded familiar when I was reading that part xD

Wow! This story is .... chaotic.and cute! Never expected it to feature a Twicord, though. A nice little one shot, complete with a Discordant Discord. Good work.

CCC

Hilarious.

Wonderfull, it should have been animated one day so i could die from sugarrush :pinkiehappy:
Now i see why DiscoLight is so popular too. Pairing a goofball with a serious pedantic bookworm have its own charm. Its also more engaging than Dislestia since we actually are witnessing all of their interactions in the show and we know everything about Twilight and most about Discord, while we know nothing on either his past experience with Celestia nor any Celestia's hobbies and interests. Except eating cake that is.
And now im worried because im starting to get rustled by Equestria GIrls and Flash while it never bothered me before. Flash is so out of place now, i really hope she just fall for his looks since that would make sense, but not his character.

Magnificently done. All Discord needed was a pair of glasses and the belief that ridiculous stories build character. Thank you for it.

5218014
In several of Lopoddity's pictures he does wear glasses (mostly in his unicorn alter form, but I'm pretty sure I've seen him in draconequus form with glasses too) and I'm fairly sure it's canon that Discord thinks ridiculous stories build character :-), so there we go.

Your mommy is weird. And that's coming from me.

Best line ever.

Discord stared at his daughter. "Has Scootaloo been babysitting you lately?"

I love this line.

Couldnt have read anything better =D

"So are school and spinach, and yet no one considers either of them any fun. In fact I'd venture to say that school is one of the biggest fun-killers in the universe, next to the Elements of Harmony."

...

derpicdn.net/media/W1siZiIsIjIwMTMvMDMvMTkvMjJfNDNfNTlfODM0XzI3NDU5OV9fVU5PUFRfX3NhZmVfcGlua2llX3BpZV9hbmltYXRlZF9yZWFjdGlvbl9pbWFnZV9jbGFwcGluZ19vcnNvbl93ZWxsZXMuZ2lmIl1d/274599__safe_pinkie-pie_animated_reaction-image_clapping_orson-welles.gif

"NO, MOMMY!" she screeched. "WE CAN'T EAT GRANDMA

Thats where I nearly lost it. Good work

Not only was this utterly hilarious in it's own right, it seemed entirely in character for Discord proving, once again, that you truly the best at writing him! Also I loved that you had references, but they were never heavy handed. The comedy came, as it should, from the characters interacting. It was also full of "daw" moments like this truly touching exchange:

"My darling daughter, would I lie to you?" Discord asked his offspring, his eyes improbably large and his paws clasped in front of his chest.

"You just said that Honesty is the worst Element there is, so... yes?"

"What a smart daughter I have! I'm so proud of you." Discord coiled his tail around his daughter in a brief hug.

...wait... Does logitech have logic?

As a Pastafari i am offended on the use of my god:raritywink::trollestia:

5222025
That's nothing, I once had Q troll an evangelical church, in front of Picard, by pretending to be Jesus Christ and demanding the pastor's shoes.

My own mother told me I was a wind-up doll and my husband told my children that he went to the moon when he was 7 and had a barbeque. I have a long history with parental trolling.

My dad convinced me I was born from a burrito and that's why every night he'd wrap me up like a burrito. I couldn't eat burritos for a year, ("WE CAN'T EAT GRANDMA!" we shared that line didn't we Panny?)

He convinced my older brother for a year that my brother was a cat when he was like 3. For three months he climbed on furniture, purred, meowed, and only ate tuna.

I convinced my baby cousin that he was a blonde (My family is full of brunettes and red heads, he and my older brother (the cat) are the only blondes) because he was Celestia's long lost son. I got his parents to go along with the story and for the duration of my visit we were online looking to find out were Celestia lives.

I felt bad about tricking my cousin for two hours until he went through my bags and took my Crown of Celestia cosplay crown... Then I fell on the floor when he said "I am Prince Aeden, son of Princess Celestia!"


ANYWAY! I like this story Brings back memories!

That's a fantastic story, Discord is perfectly Discord as always, and I love your adorable Pandora. Someday I hope to hear the story of Celestia falling in love with that cake though.

I was called the Flying Spaghetti Monster as a title of respect.

I died at this point.

This was great. Also adorable to the point of needing a warning label. :pinkiehappy:

This was an absolutely delightful read. :twilightsmile
also, "Faraday cage":rainbowlaugh:

Discord's actually a really nice dad. He's silly, but at the same time he's caring. I'd really like to see some more Pandora fanfics developing out there. Loppodity's work really should be broadened because it would make for a really interesting fanfiction series. I'm saying that as a TwiCord fan. Great story. Both sweet and hilarious.:twilightsmile:

bipedal coatless ape-thing

This is the only story that made me laugh (not just blow air though my nose) more than 10 times in 6k words :rainbowlaugh:
upvote and fave :heart:

That was the sweetest damn story ever, excellent work.

anyone, whether pony, dragon or bipedal coatless ape-thing!"

absolutely love it! I almost suffered a D'aawww attack with that ending "We can't eat grandma!" lmao

That was wonderful. The dad-trolling was exquisite. I speak from extensive experience receiving, reading, and occasionally writing dad-trolling.

Thanks for the adorableness!

Oh me gerdney. luv da stowy soo much I'm talking really weird sorry just fangirling. oh god I feel another one coming up cover your ears internet :applejackunsure:

Superbly written and intensely enjoyable. I would recommend it to anyone who wants a laugh or a d'aw or both.

Writing: 5 / 5 (far above average)
Plot: 4 / 5 (above average)

Thanks to this I have discovered the amazing pandoraverse

I'VE EATEN DISCORD'S MOM!? AHHHHHHH!!!!!!

I liked it, it was a sweet story. Thumbs up!

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

I really can't see Discord and Twilight getting together, but after this, I can at least see him being a hilarious dad. :)

That was so sweet.... and kinda sad, you get the feeling that his story was half true. That he was the last of his kind and watched all of them die from ponies. For one reason or another

I wish there was an actual story of Twi and Discord. First started seeing each other

"Your mommy is weird. And that's coming from me. :rainbowlaugh:

And why did celestia almost destroy equestria by falling in love with a cake?"
I would love to see that happen. :rainbowlaugh:

I actually read this out loud to my sister as a bedtime story (credited you). I used tiny props (balls, string, and a stuffed bear, since I didn't have a stuffed manticore), and tried to get her to guess/say some of Pandora's lines (I showed her the lines if she was having trouble, or it would be hard to guess). We had a lot of fun. Thanks for making this story!

"You're in kindergarten. It gets worse, trust me."

It totally fucking does.

And wow, didn't expect to see the FMS!

Link how the child with ti and dissi goot boorened

"Oh, it was a wonderful place," Discord said. "The sky was green and the grass was orange, except on Tuesdays, which happened every other Thursday.

why did this one line make me laugh so hard?

But Pandora's expression had turned horrified. "NO, MOMMY!" she screeched. "WE CAN'T EAT GRANDMA!"

IM DYING OMFG

I, don't know why I expected a story that Discord was making up as he was going along to make sense. But, I suppose I now know better.

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