Act VII-VI
“Did you see the look on all those nerds’ faces when I won? Ha! I wiped all those smug little grins off in a hurry, didn’t I?”
To say that Sunset was elated in the aftermath of the district Math Olympics competition was the understatement of my entire teaching profession and then some. Our school’s team exceeded all of my expectations when they took the grand prize, but the highlight of the evening for Sunset and I was when she was announced as the winner for best individual performance, as well as the team’s ‘most valuable player.’ I was so proud of her; it was irrefutable validation of all the effort I had put in. A darker part of me wished that Sombra could’ve been there to witness that victory, if only so I could have rubbed it in his face. It was juvenile and petty, and I knew it was wrong the moment it crossed my mind, but there was no harm in just a thought, was there?
As for my pupil, she was over the moon because of her success. I wished she could’ve been a bit more gracious in her victory, but seeing that it was probably one of the first shining moments of her teenage years, I was willing to give her some latitude.
“You know, Sunset, you call those other students nerds, but if you won the competition, what does that make you?”
We were walking on our way back to the hotel after the competition, both of us beaming with pride. Sunset still cradled her new trophy, a humble little token made of faux-bronze shaped into a pi symbol, with all the care and concern as a mother doting on her newborn infant. It was as if she believed it would vanish the second she let it go from her grasp. She stopped mid-stride in response to my question, and flashed me a quick stink-eye just to let me know that she was on to my attempt to instill some sense of empathy and consideration into her.
“I guess that would just makes me Queen of the Nerds,” she concluded with a feigned haughty tone. It was hard to give her a disappointed stare when I was smirking so much. “Okay, so maybe they weren’t so bad for a bunch of math dor—er, I mean, enthusiasts.”
“You shouldn’t begrudge people for being passionate about something.”
Realizing her error deflated her enthusiasm and ego a bit, which left her hanging her head for a brief moment.
“I don’t,” she insisted in a half-grumble. “Maybe I’m a little jealous they can be so open about it. At least my parents don’t pay enough attention to ask why I come home late from school so often.”
“Well, now you can tell them that you just won a big, prestigious competition.”
To my surprise, my reassurance had the opposite effect, as Sunset looked even more wary and quickly averted her gaze. Even if I hadn’t spent so much time in the past year with her, that behaviour alone was enough to set off every teacher alarm in my head. A heavy, sinking sense of dread began to creep upon me.
“Sunset, your parents know you’re here, right?”
“T-they know I won’t be home until tomorrow,” my pupil answered, while finding the most interesting lamppost across the street to admire.
I leaned over to try and get her to look me in the eye, but she just kept turning her head in order to avoid it, almost to the point where I feared she’d twist her own head off. “Did you tell your parents that you’d be here, in this city, competing in the Math Olympics?”
“I… might not have mentioned it…” Whatever else Sunset said after that came out as nothing more than incoherent murmurings.
Not that I was paying attention since the only thing running through my head was my husband’s voice going ‘told you so.’ “Sunset, you can’t just do that. They’re still your parents,” I chastised her. “You know what a self-fulfilling prophecy is, right?”
Still looking away, she managed to find her voice after a prolonged pause. “You don’t need to be a prophet to know they’d never make time for me,” she answered in a somber tone. “They certainly wouldn’t start now. It’s all just client meetings and projects and business trips for them.”
“Still, you shouldn’t have told me—”
“I said they wouldn’t be able to make it, and that part is still true.”
Looking back, I realized she had, in fact, only told me that her parents were unavailable. I only presumed that this meant they were aware of what was going on. It didn’t excuse what Sunset did, but it made me take notice of my own preconceptions. In the end, I was the adult, and I should’ve known better. Despite a strong defense, Sunset could see that I still wasn’t happy about it. We were splitting hairs and arguing over semantics at this point. She stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and finally managed to force a meek, remorseful gaze back to me.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to mislead you,” she apologized. “I would never lie to you. Y-you know that, right?”
At least she was quick to recognize her mistakes, and since I felt I had erred in jumping to conclusions, I decided that Sunset’s sense of guilt was enough punishment for now. Besides, I wanted that day to be one of happy memories for her, lest I scare her away from getting involved in academic contests in the future.
“I know you wouldn’t,” I reassured her. With a hand on her shoulder, I coaxed her back to a walking pace. “But promise me that when you get home, you’ll tell them where you were and what you accomplished. Can you do that for me?”
Sunset nodded, but said nothing else.
Not wanting my pupil’s mood to be left dour for the remainder of the day, I decided to spring my surprise on her earlier than I had planned. It was as good a time as any, really, and it was becoming sorely needed. I took Sunset by the hand and began leading her in a new direction, which caught her attention right away.
“W-wait, isn’t the hotel that way?” she stammered, but followed along dutifully nonetheless.
Wanting it to be a surprise, I kept her in the dark until we reached our destination just a few blocks down the street. At first glance, the simple brick-faced cafe did little to stand out from its surroundings, but upon stepping inside, we were greeted to the decadent fragrances of sweet vanilla, hot fudge, and fruity syrups.
“This is…”
“The best place in town for ice cream,” I interrupted, “or so I’ve been told.”
Sunset almost leapt out of her boots in her excitement, letting out a jubilant squeal as she bounded over to the order counter. “Best. Day. Ever!”
It was impossible to deny that my spirits felt uplifted as well with my earlier concerns melting to the back of my mind until I couldn’t even remember why I felt that way in the first place. By the time I joined my pupil, she already had her face planted against the glass case displaying all the ice cream varieties available.
“So many flavours… so hard to choose…” Sunset murmured under her breath.
“Well, feel free to pick whatever you want: it’s my treat.”
Sunset gave me a wide-eyed stare after hearing the offer, as though such a concept was unfathomable for her. But her eyes soon began to sparkle, her lips curling into a brilliant grin, before she turned to the young woman behind the counter.
“I’ll take the biggest sundae you got!”
My wallet soon came to regret the offer, as the largest item on the menu had the fitting name ‘Kitchen Sink’, and while it did not come in a container as large as one, the behemoth mountain of fudge-covered ice cream did include almost everything but. It cost more than most meals, and while I would have liked to remind Sunset on the virtues of restraint, when would I ever have a chance to spoil her like this again? As the two of us sat down in a corner booth with our desserts, I became increasingly envious of the black-hole that was a teenager’s stomach. The towering pile of cream and sugar dwarfed my order of a more sensible strawberry parfait, which was easier on both my wallet and my hips.
“Are you even going to have room for dinner tonight?” I asked with noted concern.
“Who needs to?” she answered, a hungry gaze still fixated on the monstrosity before her. Unwilling to waste another moment, Sunset grabbed her spoon and dove in headlong.
Despite my worries, it was still amusing to watch her voracious appetite at work. “Just be careful not to eat too quickly,” I reminded her.
“Please, I’m not a child,” she scoffed between mouthfuls in a manner least befitting of what she claimed.
Thankfully, she was too preoccupied to notice my somersaulting eyes. The atmosphere was sweet and tranquil, and perhaps from a distance we gave an air of mother and child. It reminded me how long it had been since I had done anything similar with my parents. They had been gone for several years by then, and back then I was your typical teenager: absorbed in my own world of friends and hobbies. As I grew older, the memories of them became ever dimmer, fading away like stones eroding along the shoreline. I hoped that today could be a memory that Sunset would be able to cherish for years to come.
At the same time, though, I couldn’t shake some of the things that my husband had said to me days earlier. Maybe a part of me did wish that Sunset could’ve been the daughter that I never had. Was that so wrong of me? It wasn’t as if I were stealing her away from her parents; they barely even paid attention to her. People who grew up without parental guidance regularly found substitutes in other people. I wasn’t breaking any rules or ethical codes either, and I wasn’t giving her any unfair advantages in her school work. Besides, I was only ever going to be a supporting character in Sunset’s story: in a few months, she would graduate high school and move onto the next chapter of her life, and I would be little more than fond memories.
“So have you been giving any thought as to what you’ll do after you graduate?” I asked, since the subject was on my mind.
Sunset gave me a ‘deer in the headlights’ stare for a second, spoon still in her mouth, before casting a sideways glance in her telltale sign that she had apprehensions about her answer. “I… um, hadn’t really given it much thought,” she answered, albeit muffled until she finally took the spoon out. Tapping her spoon against the rim of her bowl, she continued to fidget and avoid direct eye contact as she clearly stalled for time. “I was, like… maybe thinking of going someplace local. M-maybe a school for music and stuff…”
I could tell that she had spent more time thinking about her ice cream choices than she did about her post-high school plans. While that disappointed me as a teacher, it was not unexpected: so much of her life had changed in such a short time that the factors influencing her decision now were probably never even considered at the start of the school year. I wouldn’t have been surprised if her original plan was to go with whatever university or college her parents pushed upon her.
I must’ve been reflecting on that for too long, as Sunset took notice of my silence. “Are you… disappointed?” she asked, shrinking in her seat.
“Of course not,” I reassured her, putting on my best smile. “But as your teacher, I would be remiss if I didn’t try to push you to a high standard. There are some excellent local universities, but I just want to make sure you’re not considering those simply because it’s safer.”
The fact she fell silent and looked away was enough to confirm my suspicion, but I waited nonetheless for her to muster the courage to speak her mind. “If I leave for university… I’ll be alone again,” she bemoaned.
“And I know that can be scary, but you’ve made so much progress in just this year alone. You should never be afraid to pursue your dreams, and I have absolute faith that you’d be able to make new friends wherever you choose to go.”
Sinking in her seat, Sunset replied in a barely audible mumble, “But I want to stay with you.”
Now I was confident that I heard her correctly, but all the same I asked in response, “Sorry, what was that?”
Despite being meant as an innocent and innocuous question, it nonetheless startled Sunset. “N-nothing, I was just—oh, my ice cream’s starting to melt!”
I couldn’t help but giggle quietly to myself as she tried to hide her embarrassment by diving head-first into her sundae. She couldn’t hide forever, however; she’d have to face me at some point.
“AGGHHHHHHHHH!”
I peaked around the side of the sundae and found my pupil grimacing with her head clutched between her hands. “Eat too quickly?”
“N-no,” she stammered back. “I’m just… in awe of how delicious it is.”
She must’ve realized how ridiculous she came off, as she started to laugh, which soon infected me. By the time she settled down, it seemed her nerves had calmed down as well.
“I’m touched that you think so highly of me,” I continued the conversation from where we had left off. “But you’ve an opportunity to go places and do things that a lot of students never get. When I was your age, I had no choice but to stay local for college. Between my grades, my finances, and taking care of my younger sister, it was simply impossible for me.”
“If I do leave, you won’t… forget about me, right?”
“How could I possibly forget about someone as incredible as you?”
“O-okay, I’ll… I’ll think about it,” a thoroughly embarrassed Sunset replied.
In truth, I was just as disappointed about the prospect of her leaving, but I couldn’t give voice to such selfish whims. Even as I encouraged her to seek out the world, a part of me was touched to hear that she wanted to stay somewhere close to me. As her teacher, though, I had to content myself with what time we had together while wishing silently that things could stay that way forever. Looking back, though, I was in complete denial.
I did love her.
********************
For most people, the end of the school year was greeted with a mixture of jubilation and trepidation. Everyone looked forward to the freedom of the summer holidays, but dreaded the one last obstacle that were the final exams. For the senior students, it also meant saying farewell to one chapter of their life before the next big step to becoming true adults. For myself, it was always bittersweet to say goodbye to those that I had helped guide and mentor over the past year, but I was always proud to send them off to their next adventure in life, where I had no doubt they would find success.
That year, there was far more bitter than sweet, as the concept that Sunset Shimmer would be graduating drew closer to becoming reality. Though I had told her that I would never forget about her, I couldn’t help but wonder if the sentiment was mutual. If I asked, I was certain she’d insist she would never, ever forget about me either, but when I thought about my own life, how many teachers did I say that to when I was growing up? How many teachers could I even put a face to anymore? After four years of college life, would the name ‘Celestia’ even matter to her anymore.
With any other student, this was just an accepted part of the profession, but with the end of the school year only a few weeks away, I found the concern occupying my mind more and more. It was unethical to play favourites amongst my students, but with graduation only a few days away, I felt a growing urge to do something, say something, to properly convey to Sunset how much the past year had meant to me. I would miss her expectant stares when she waited outside my classroom at the end of the school day; I would miss the excited bounce in her step when we walked to the music room together, and most of all, I would miss how she smiled whenever she held a guitar in her hands.
I may have been young and naive back then, but I was certain that I’d never have another student that measured up to her.
One Friday after classes had been dismissed, I was feeling particularly melancholic over the prospect of the ending year, and sought to alleviate my concerns with a heavy dose of wistful nostalgia.
When I arrived at the school music room, I discovered I was not the only person making use of it. The real surprise, however, was the fact that it was my husband that I found there, alongside another woman whom I didn’t recognize. It was a slight relief that when I entered, they looked to me with a hint of surprise, but no embarrassment or panic, so at least I hadn’t walked in on anything inappropriate. Judging by how they stood at the head of the classroom with my husband making sweeping gestures towards the seating areas that they were discussing something school related.
The woman, though, didn’t appear to be any school official that I was familiar with, so despite the seemingly school-related nature, she nonetheless left me feeling concerned. With long, flowing curls of magenta hair, she looked to be a bit older than me, but her poise and demeanour betrayed a maturity beyond my own. There was a sort of regal air about her; an aura that said in a polite, dignified tone, ‘why yes, I am exceedingly wealthy.’
“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude,” I apologized once I realized my mistake.
“Actually, quite the contrary,” the woman replied, her words spoken with a velvet-like elegance to them. “Mr. Sombra was just giving a tour of the facilities, but I’m rather interested in meeting some of the faculty here.”
Seizing the opportunity, Sombra stepped closer and pulled me in with an arm across my shoulder. “And I couldn’t think of a better person to start the introductions with. This is my wife, Celestia: she teaches social studies, but she also helps out with extracurriculars in the math and music departments.” A part of me couldn’t help but feel a little relieved that he stated in no uncertain terms what our relationship was. “Celestia, this is Mi Amore Aria.”
In that moment, I realized the name couldn’t have been a coincidence and I remembered the text messages I found on my husband’s phone. The ‘Mi Amore’ in his missives wasn’t him flirting, it was about the woman before me. That just lead to a far more unsettling question: why did Sombra feel a need to hide his activities with her? And why did she have such an interest in the school and its staff?
As we shook hands, Miss Aria gave me a curious look and smirked for a moment. “The district Math Olympics, correct?”
“Come again?”
“Your photo was in the local papers after the Math Olympics a few months ago. You were alongside one of your pupils, a Miss…”
“Sunset Shimmer.”
“Such a wonderfully dedicated teacher,” Aria complimented me, albeit in a tone that sounded less altruistic than I would’ve imagined. “I do hope you’ll be open to exploring your employment opportunities when the time comes.”
“I… beg your pardon?” Normally such a comment would’ve rolled off my back without a second thought, but I noticed my husband recoil ever so slightly when Aria spoke. I had seen such a reaction in enough students to know that something was amiss and he knew what. “Dear, is there something you wish to discuss?”
“We’re entering a partnership with the district school board,” Aria explained before my husband could even fix his feigned stoicism. “The Mi Amore family has recently gotten involved with the education sector. While we wholeheartedly believe in the value of a public education system, in recognizing that there are challenges that the current system simply isn’t capable of meeting, we have decided to take a more proactive approach.”
The way she spoke with rehearsed precision made my skin crawl. The words leaving her mouth felt more like a swarm of locusts than anything I would’ve considered enticing. This was not, however, the first time I had come across someone who advocated for private education, which she was doing regardless of how much she tried to dress it up as if she were doing a public service. Since the last time I got into an argument over the finer points of public versus private systems, I married my opponent, I just opted to maintain a polite facade.
“So what exactly does this partnership entail, and what does it have to do with our school?”
I also wanted to ask why was she conducting secret meetings with my husband, but I couldn’t reveal the fact that I knew about those—not yet, at least.
With a hint of surprise, Aria looked over to Sombra and remarked, “Have you not explained things to your staff yet?”
“That was going to be the subject of Monday’s staff meeting,” he groaned whilst burying his face into his palm. Eventually, he realized the futility of trying to maintain the charade. “The truth is, Celestia, the school board has decided that we’re to be shut down.”
“What? I thought they weren’t going to vote on it until the summer break!”
“Officially, yes, but my sources tell me that the decision’s already been made: the vote at this point is just a formality.”
I may as well have been told I was dying by the way I just stared in slack-jawed disbelief. All the work I had done building myself a future at the school and community was about to go up in smoke. That on its own was worrying enough, but my thoughts soon turned to another concern.
“What’s going to happen to all the students that aren’t graduating this year?”
“Given the haste of this new arrangement,” Aria said as she stepped in to answer with a disarming, diplomatic smile, “the Mi Amore Foundation is prepared to offer a steep discount on tuition for the current body for the next school year.”
My gaze narrowed on the woman, as I had to fight down the rising sense of disgust. “Well that’s awfully generous of you,” I said with a forced stiffness that made no effort to hide its true nature. “I can’t help but wonder what you set to gain by not simply filling the classrooms with new, full-tuition students.”
Her expression made a subtle change, her smile not so much diplomatic, but possessing an air of collected arrogance about it. It was a stark contrast to my husband who was clearly in damage control mode.
“Now dear, this really isn’t the time and place to be discussing such minute details when the arrangement is still in its infancy,” he insisted. However, neither I nor Aria moved an inch as we stared one another down.
“You’re clearly a perceptive woman, Miss Celestia, so I won’t insult your intelligence by claiming pure altruism here,” Aria said, almost as if taunting me. “As the Mi Amore family is making its first step in this endeavour into private education, a school with three-quarters of its roster already filled will make for a more enticing proposition for new students, as well as provide a testing bed while we refine our new learning programs.”
Were I more astute at the time, I would’ve noticed the growing panic in my husband’s expression, as this was the exact sort of conversation he wanted to avoid, and this was because he knew precisely how I would take the news.
“Are you kidding me?” I wanted to say, but what actually came out of my mouth included a few extra words that are best not repeated in polite company. I turned to my husband, having decided that I wouldn’t waste further breath on Miss Mi Amore, to continue dispensing my two cents on the matter. “How could you agree to this kind of proposal? She’s going to turn our students into guinea pigs and advertisement material!”
“I know it’s not perfect, but it’s better than just letting everybody be scattered across the district,” Sombra pleaded in a rather futile effort to calm me down. “And it’s not as if they’re going to be tossed some radical new curriculum with no oversight. We’ll have an opportunity to shape it to exactly how we want it.”
“We?” I repeated, taken aback for a moment in surprise. “You mean to tell me, you’ve actually agreed to join this… this… extortion racket?”
A heavy, unsettling sigh floated from his lips, like a doctor ready to deliver the bad news. “They’ve agreed to make me principal during the transition period. If everything goes smoothly, then they’ll hire me permanently for the position.”
“You… you… sellout!”
Whether it was simply pride or personal offense from my remarks, Sombra’s brow furrowed deep as he stared me down. “Pull your head out of the clouds, Celestia, this is done for. The system is failing our students! You should know that better than anyone else because of your pet project.”
“What do you mean? In a few weeks, Sunset’s going to graduate near the top of the honour roll.”
“Yes, because you’ve taken a considerable amount of time out of your own personal schedule to mentor her every step of the way. Do you know how many teachers ignored her problem? How many just wrote her off? If you hadn’t been there, do you think someone else would’ve caught her, or would she have just fallen through the cracks?”
Sombra knew how to make a cutting argument. I had no response because I knew he was right. If I hadn’t taken Sunset under my wing, she would’ve continued to be miserable, and there probably wouldn’t have been a single other teacher who would’ve made the effort to save her. It wasn’t as though my coworkers were callous; they just had their hands full already. Between preparing lesson plans, marking tests and papers, supervising extracurriculars, and managing their own personal lives, how many people would have the time to take on a near full-time mentorship? I only managed because I was still relatively new both to the job and the city, so my workloads were light and I had few social commitments, and my husband’s long hours at work meant I had more free time than most.
“Celestia, I’m not saying what you did isn’t commendable,” Sombra continued while taking a more merciful tone. “But there are Sunset Shimmers in every grade, every year. These students shouldn’t have to hope for someone as charitable as you to swoop in and save them, because there’s no way you can be there for everyone. I know this isn’t perfect, but we have a chance here to make a better school: one where everyone can get the help and attention they need. Isn’t that why we became teachers?”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I knew my husband had his ambitions, but I never imagined he would go to such lengths to reach them. Maybe the ends did justify the means, but my younger self could not look past how wrong everything about the arrangement felt. As much as I wanted to press the issue further, I knew my emotions would get the better of my judgment, and I didn’t want to argue with Sombra in front of others.
“We will discuss this at home,” I hissed to him before I pushed my way past. Another minute in that room and I was liable to do something rash.
********************
Under normal circumstances, after a fight with my husband, I would’ve jumped into the car, driven home, and spent the rest of the evening binging on ice cream while watching sitcom reruns. However, Sombra and I drove in to work together, and it was raining that afternoon with the forecast calling for even worse in the evening. As upset as I was with him, abandoning him at work in the middle of a rainstorm was a level of pettiness I wasn’t prepared to indulge in. Yet.
Instead, I merely retreated to the relative safety of my classroom desk, burying my face into my arms so that I could wallow in my own misery. The whole conversation with Miss Mi Amore and my husband just kept playing over and over again in my mind. It all still felt so surreal to me. I knew Sombra had his ambitions, but to go so far as to partner up with some greedy bloodsucker in order to get it? I thought him better than that. His concerns and grievances weren’t wrong, but there had to be a better way than just surrendering ourselves over to whomever cut us the biggest check.
That was not how I envisioned my career as an educator. I had wanted to build myself a legacy: to watch my community grow and blossom into something that I could look back upon with pride. Most of all, I had wanted to build that dream with him. Life had a strange way of crashing down atop your hopes and aspirations without even so much as a ‘heads up’. There didn’t seem to be any easy answer to the issue either: if I talked Sombra out of taking the position, he could come to resent me for stifling his aspirations; if I stayed and helped him, I wasn’t sure if I would be able to reconcile that with my beliefs.
Just as my despair began to feel suffocating, she showed up.
“Is something wrong, Celestia?”
I wasn’t surprised to see Sunset Shimmer now sitting opposite me, her usual warm smile replaced with a worried stare.
“Oh, it’s nothing. Just a little tired, that’s all.”
She frowned and leaned in closer, almost as if for a moment our roles as teacher and pupil reversed. “Do you normally cry when you’re tired?”
It took a cursory finger sweep for me to realize that she wasn’t just trying to bluff me out. “It’s just… some things at the school will be changing; things that I didn’t expect. Things that I wasn’t prepared for.”
Sunset reached across the table and rested her hand atop of mine. It was a rare feeling to be comforted by someone other than my husband. I had few close friends in Fillydelphia, and my only remaining family was working on her college education as well. The fact that she was my student and almost a decade my junior didn’t matter to me—I needed a friend, and Sunset was the only person there for me.
“They’re shutting down the school.” I knew that telling people before a formal announcement was made could upset Sombra and Mi Amore’s time table and plans to control the narrative, but I saw no reason to make things easier for them.
“Seriously? But I thought—when is this happening?”
“Over the summer. The announcement will probably happen on Monday,” I explained as I straightened my posture. I took a moment to gaze out the nearby window; my classroom was at the front end of the school, so I was always able to watch as students left for home. It had always been a calming sight for me, and one that I realized I would soon be losing.
Sunset just stared in stunned silence for a moment, which was understandable, but she didn’t look nearly as distraught as I felt. Of course, she would be leaving soon, so what happened to her old high school probably mattered little to her. The only important things about this place were myself and the friends with whom she’d be graduating alongside.
“What’s going to happen to you?” she asked with a wariness to her voice.
“I… I honestly don’t know,” I answered in reluctance. “The school is going to be taken over by a private enterprise, and Sombra is going to be put in charge. I could try to find work at another school, but I only got this position because Sombra was able to pull some strings for me. I could maybe work in the private school when it opens but…”
“Do you really dislike the idea of working at a private school that much?”
Had my husband asked such a question, I would’ve been certain it was meant as a provocation to draw out another one of our usual debates of private versus public systems. Sunset, though, was genuinely curious, and perhaps just trying to help me understand my feelings better: much like how I chose to simply ask questions of Sunset in order to find out what she really wanted from school.
I sighed, if only to buy time to collect my thoughts. “You remember what I told you around the time we first met? A school is not just about tests and essays and homework, it’s about preparing students for the next stage of their life. It’s a foundation upon which the rest of your life is built. Every child deserves that, not just the ones who can afford it. Working there would just feel like a betrayal of that. I just can’t support that in good conscience.” It sounded naive when I said it out loud, which only made me feel more foolish and uncertain about the whole thing. Maybe my husband had a point; maybe we could do more good if I followed him down that road. “I always knew my husband and I would come to an impasse about this at some point, but I didn’t think it would be this soon. Not like this.”
“Well, he’s a jerk for dropping this on you so suddenly,” Sunset said without hesitation.
I couldn’t disagree with that sentiment, though I had to be the adult and keep the smirk on the inside. “He knew I’d object. Maybe even try to intervene—rally the other teachers against him. If he left me without any alternatives, I’d probably be easier to convince.” With the way I phrased it, it sounded almost nefarious, like a coup. Sunset was angry because she didn’t know him like I did. His methods might’ve been a bit underhanded, but his intentions were honest and noble.
At least, that’s what I kept telling myself.
“Sombra had always wanted to run a school together with me,” I continued on despite no prompting. “We used to talk about it long into the night when we were just starting out. I always loved how passionate he could be about it. He was never the type to sit idly by when something was wrong, not when he knew he could do something to fix it. I think that’s why he insisted that I look into your case in the first place; he didn’t trust the system to take care of you.”
Sunset sank into her seat in a move that mirrored her own deflating fury. “I guess he can make a good decision once in a while,” she murmured, sheepish and conflicted. She must not have liked the idea of feeling indebted to him, but the relationship we had wouldn’t have occurred had Sombra not decided to take the unorthodox route. He could’ve passed Sunset off to one of the other teachers or the guidance counsellor, but I think a part of him knew what the girl needed—someone that could truly inspire Sunset to be the best she could. “You said that running a school was his dream, but what about yours? Is that really your dream as well?”
“My dream?” It was a simple question, one that I had asked numerous times over to my students. Despite always expecting an honest answer from them, when put on the spot I felt a hint of anxiety. “I suppose the one thing I’ve always dreamed of is putting down roots and settling down, raising a family.”
“Putting down roots?” my visibly confused pupil replied. “That’s it?”
“Why? Is that not progressive enough for a modern woman in this day and age?” I quipped back. I realized that a bit more was needed for everything to make sense for her. “Sunset, I was around your age when I lost both of my parents. Instead of taking tentative steps into adulthood, I was thrown head first. I suddenly had to start dealing with taxes and finances, legal matters, and a little sister who took the loss even harder than I did.”
“So you dreamed of the thing that you lost in your childhood?” Sunset asked, always trying to figure out the puzzle ahead of schedule.
“In a sense,” I said with a subtle nod. “But it wasn’t just about replacement. Nothing in my life was the same after that day. As I grew older, I would always hear my peers and colleagues talk about the lives they’ve built—about people they’ve known since childhood, about the places they’ve watched grow and change, about friends who’ve been with them so long they were like an extended family. I never had any of those. Nothing in my life was stable after my parents died. I had to change my college plans, and I had no time for my old high school friends. What little time I had to myself outside of study was occupied trying to manage the rest of my life. I had to learn how to do taxes, maintain a house, cook proper meals, even how to change a tire or fix a lightswitch.” As the weight of my words beared down upon me, it felt like it took all my strength just to keep my head up. “I thought once I graduated, got married, and found a job, I could find that stability again, and start building that… thing that everyone else seemed to enjoy.”
“Haven’t you and Sombra tried, you know, having a family? You two have been married for several years now, right?”
A heavy, sinking sigh was my immediate response, and one that gave Sunset enough of an impression that I could see her immediately regretting having asked the question. It wasn’t her fault, though; how could she have known. It wasn’t something a girl her age should ever have to think about.
“We’ve tried, but…”
“I-it’s okay, you don’t need to say any more. I’m sorry I brought it up.”
“You don’t need to apologize, Sunset,” I reassured her, even though it was a painful subject to bring up. “We tried. We tried everything, but after enough doctor visits, you have to accept the truth that it’s never going to happen.”
“Was it… because of him, or…?”
I offered up a silent shrug at first, though it felt insufficient. “Some days, I want to blame him; other days, I want to blame myself. Most of the time, though, there just isn’t anything or anyone to blame. It’s just how things are, and you have to learn to make peace with it.” To no surprise, the soberness of the subject matter had snuffed out any spirit of optimism in the air. As much as I would have liked to otherwise, I had to be the adult and put on a brave face. I forced out a faint smile before reaching over and patting my disheartened pupil on the shoulder. “For all the good and bad, though, it’s part of what has made me the person I am, and it’s helped me learn to better appreciate what I have with my students. Between my husband and my wonderful students, what more could a person ask for?”
Alas, my hopes were for naught, as Sunset’s gaze sank even further, until she wasn’t even looking up at me. I presumed it would just take her a bit longer to accept things, but I neglected how passionate she could get as well.
All of a sudden, she slammed her hands down and rose to her feet with a loud declaration, “This is complete bull!”
“Calm down. I know it’s far from ideal but—”
“This isn’t fair at all, and you know it!” Sunset shot back, refusing to yield. “He’s your husband; you’re supposed to support one another but he’s forcing you to choose between your dreams and your principles just so he can get to his dreams a little bit sooner! Why do his aspirations get to take priority over yours? Why does he get to make the decision without even so much as talking to you about it?”
“That’s not—he’s just trying to do what he thinks is best for the students,” I replied in a fumbled attempt to placate my student.
“Stop defending him! Why are you protecting a man who’s not even taking your feelings into consideration? This is your life—your dream—and he’s taking control of it! You told me I should always fight for my dreams, so why aren’t you?”
A part of me did wonder why I was defending my husband. Maybe I should’ve been as angry about it as Sunset was. The decision did upset me, but it was a matter I wanted to settle in private and with a calmer mind.
“I understand your frustrations, but this is my problem to solve,” I said as I rose to my feet. “The term is almost over, you have more important things to worry about.”
“What are you talking about? There’s nobody more important than you!” Sunset exclaimed, seizing my hands with both of hers and holding tight. I thought she had been frustrated, but as her eyes locked with mine, she looked scared more than anything. “You’re the person who looked out for me when everybody gave up. You’re the only one who ever cared about what I wanted. When everything in my life was gray, you showed me how beautiful the world could be.”
Even though she didn’t need to say it, those words nonetheless felt heartwarming to hear: the explicit confirmation that this bond we had wasn’t just my imagination, and that she did cherish our time together just as much as I had.
If only it could have stopped there.
“You have been, without a doubt, the best student I’ve ever had,” I replied, feeling my heart swell with pride. “But you are still at the start of your life’s story, and I can only play a small, supporting role in that. There’s a new chapter for you just waiting to be discovered, and you have your own dreams to pursue.”
“But that’s not what I want!” Sunset’s voice began to tremble, as did her hands. I had no idea why she was suddenly getting so emotional. “You taught me not to give up on my dreams.” Despite her hands feeling so small and frail compared to mine, her grip was almost crushing, as though letting go of me for a second would see me whisked away forever. “I-I was going to wait until after I graduated to say this, but my only dream is to stay by your side forever!”
I should’ve realized what Sunset was insinuating sooner, but between the distractions of my original dilemma and the sudden swings in the direction of the conversation, my thoughts and focus were scattered to the winds.
“What are you saying?”
“I’m in love with you, Celestia!”
Before I even had time to react, Sunset had closed the gap and caught me in a forceful, if awkward, kiss. Her lips were warm, but trembling; I could feel the entirety of all of her hopes and fears pouring into me. A girl just looking for love, taking a blind leap of faith in a desperate gambit, and leaving her heart open and vulnerable. Were any other person on the receiving end of this act, I would’ve commended her courage and prayed for her success. In that moment, however, all I could think of was how quickly this one act could destroy my career if anybody happened to pass by the classroom. Never mind just losing my job, I could lose my entire career and reputation: I might never be able to work as a teacher again.
When I should have been thinking about how this display of misguided adoration could hurt Sunset’s future, both as a student and a person, all I could see was my dreams going up in flames.
I did what any sensible person should do, and once I had realized what was happening, I pushed her away. Alas, in my haste and panic, I had put enough force into it that I wound up inadvertently knocking her over in the process.
“What are you doing? I’m married, for god’s sake!”
“To a man I’ve watched ignore you and take advantage of your kindness. A man that you’ve complained about time and time again,” Sunset replied. Her shock at my response was evident, and the fear in the eyes should’ve given me pause, except that I was just as terrified. Both of us saw our worlds crumbling beneath us. “People who love each other, support one another, not strongarm them into giving up their dreams. He doesn’t love you, not like I do. I’d never do anything to hurt you!”
“Th-that’s not true.” I shouldn’t have been stammering; I should’ve been more resolute, but too many things had happened, there was too much on my mind. “Yes, things between me and Sombra are… strained right now, but that doesn’t mean we’ve stopped loving one another.”
“But does he? Does he really? When was the last time he put his job aside for you?” Sunset challenged with growing determination. Was it bravado fueling her, or just desperation? “How many times have you taken time out of your personal life so we could be together? You’ve probably spent more time this past month with me than him.”
“Y-you’re my student! It’s not—”
“Only for another month, then I graduate. And then a few months after that, I’ll be eighteen—an adult!” She slowly got back to her feet, her hands reaching out to take hold of mine again. “Forget about him. It’ll just be you and me, together, like it’s always been. I-if you’re worried about what others might think then we can just leave; find a place where nobody knows who we are. I know I can’t give you a family like you’ve always wanted, but… but I love you more than anything in this world. I’d do anything for you. That has to count for something, doesn’t it?”
So terrified was I of the prospect of somebody walking in at that moment, that without evening thinking I found myself recoiling away from her. Just a few minutes prior, I would’ve been willing to do anything, endure any hardship, if it meant making her happy. Anything but this.
Sunset must’ve been able to sense my apprehensions as I could see her own expression begin to waver, desperate hope turning into a slow boiling terror. “W-what’s wrong, Celestia? Don’t you… don’t you love me, too? You’re not really going to choose him over me, are you?”
I thought I had been prepared for any situation that a high school could throw at me, but on that afternoon, my mind had gone almost completely blank. I had to say something, but I didn’t know what were the right words.
Finally, I answered with the first thing that came to mind, “You don’t love me; you’re just confused.”
“How can you say that?” Sunset shot back. “I’ve seen who you really are every time we’ve met outside the classroom, when you’re not putting on a face for everyone else. Think about all the time we’ve spent together; how happy they made you. That’s the real Celestia—who always smiles when she watches the sun set, who always takes that extra moment to savour the aroma of the day’s first cup of tea, who watches me so intently when I’m practicing guitar, and who always takes the time to make me feel special.” Sunset slowly shrunk away, drawing her arms inward as her timid gaze met mine. “That’s the Celestia I fell in love with.”
It was clear that she wouldn’t be dissuaded, least of all by my lack-lustre resolve. Though it pained me to admit it, I had to be firm with her; I had to be cruel.
“That is enough!” I barked at her, catching my pupil by surprise. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. This isn’t love, this is just you caught up in warm, fuzzy feelings because you don’t know any better. You don’t understand what love is, what it takes.” My initial outburst soon subsided, like a heavy weight finally easing off my shoulders. “How could you understand: you’re still just a child. Everything at your age is just sunshine, and rainbows, and cotton candy dreams.”
“B-but… but I need—”
“Go home, Sunset Shimmer. I can’t give you what you’re looking for.” My words came out colder than I intended, but my emotions were burnt out by that point. Watching the tears begin to stream down her face was nothing short of torture, but what more could I expect? I broke her heart, and the sight of her as she realized her world was crumbling around her was my punishment.
“Y… y-you said…” She couldn’t even manage a whole sentence before she started weeping into her hands. Her sobbing hung in the air as she raced out of the room, leaving me to sit alone and ruminate on my sins.
I collapsed once more at my desk and buried my head under my arms. I didn’t know whether I wanted to cry, scream, or just bang my head against the wood until I couldn’t feel anything. Those emotions, though, were as indecisive as the rest of me. The only thought that ran through my head was the repeating of ‘how?’ How did I not notice this? How did I let things get this way? How could I have stopped this before it got to this point?
I was a fool for letting myself get so carried away. As much as I would’ve liked to, it was hard to blame Sunset for what happened. It wasn’t her fault that she didn’t understand the nature of the love between us. In the end, she was just a child, trying to make herself into an adult before she had learned everything she needed to.
Life could be a cruel teacher, and while I hated myself for having to break her heart, I tried to console myself with the knowledge that she’d grow past this. Maybe even be stronger for it. She wasn’t the first girl in the world to have a crush on their teacher. Everyone eventually grew out of it; for many it was just another stage of adolescence.
She’d be fine, in time. As much as she would protest otherwise, she didn’t need the likes of me anymore. I was never intended to be anything more than a single chapter in the story of her life, one that would soon be closed. That was how it was meant to be, even if a part of me wanted it to be otherwise. That’s just how life was.
There was only the pattering of rain against the windows to remind me that the world was still moving forward, regardless of how much I wish I could turn things back. I wasn’t sure how long I intended to sulk, and it was all too tempting to change my mind and give chase, if for no other reason than to spare Sunset from having to walk home in such poor weather.
I was eventually pulled out of my emotional tailspin when I heard the peculiar sound of hurried footsteps coming from the hallway. With most of the students having already gone home, it was quite out of place, and it sounded heavier than that of the typical teenager. I looked to the door just in time to see not one, but two of my coworkers race past my door. Why were they in such a rush?
Spurred on by curiosity, I got up and was just about to head into the hallway when yet another coworker darted past my door: this time it was Sombra. He didn’t even appear to have noticed me.
“He would never run at work,” I muttered under my breath. “Unless…”
Something was wrong. He wouldn’t run unless something was wrong. As a sense of dread began to well up inside, I chased after my husband, who led me outside to the front of the school. There was a crowd gathered outside near the street next to a parked car, and it struck me as peculiar that nobody seemed to care about the heavy downpour. Even Sombra ran out without having bothered with a coat.
As I got closer, I noticed that the car’s windshield had a large web of cracks in the center of it. Did somebody get hurt? There was a lot of commotion going on, so it was hard to see past all the people who had crowded around.
Finally, I was near enough Sombra to speak up. “What’s going on here?”
He spun around, his wide-eyed and panicked expression surprising me almost as much as my presence had surprised him. “Dear, you shouldn’t be here. J-just go back inside and wait for me.”
“Why? What’s going on?” When I tried pushing my way past him, he stepped in front and physically held me back.
“Celestia, please! You don’t want to see this!”
Growing more worried, I pushed harder. “What do you even mean? What is this all ab… out…” My words trailed off into silence as I caught a brief glimpse through the crowd. I could see a hand laying on the street, draped in strands of gold and crimson. “S… S-Sunset? Sunset!”
And just like that…
She was gone…
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Bruh
And now I see why this chapter took so long to get out... that was... I'm...
I have no words. I'm really speechless.
9968801
This tbh
Well... yeah, I've got nothing.
It's back!
...
..........
I saw this coming and it still breaks my heart.
I saw that ending coming, but the twist before took me by surprise.
Oh f**k
...It's hard to find the words. There had been fear over this outcome and to reach it doesn't make that any easier. This was just a complete tragedy for Celestia and her world's Sunset. With all these troubles and bursting emotions all at once, it was more than either of them could bear or to process rationally. There were no bad guys in this, just bad decisions and pain and fear.
On some lighter sides, it was heartwarming to see the care and love between Celestia and Sunset, whether they should be seen as tragic lovers or a tragic mother and daughter figure. And it was an amusing touch on how Celestia thought she wouldn't go around parading her students' achievements to Sombra's face yet, given she did so with Equestrian Sunset after her award.
This was a well done chapter, tragic and heartbreaking, but masterfully done. I can't wait to see what the outcome of all this will be.
We all saw this coming... Doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt
9968826
Literally no possible way to word my emotional response...
Just because you see it coming doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.
Oh no...no no no no no no no you didn't just do what I think you just did...So mad genius son of a bitch
... I knew she was gone... But, no... Not like this.
Thank you for continuing this story.
Then imagine how Celestia felt when our pony Sunset stormed out of her house two chapters ago.
9969027
It was the other way around for me.
A parental void in one's heart being filled with mother daughter moments from clear displays of maternal love (very adorable and well written) only to go straight into lust? ....Wat?
I get wanting to avoid the whole "Be my mom!" thing because it's been done to death, but... you kind of wrote yourself into that corner. I get it's the same end result (Rejection followed by either getting hit by accident or on purpose), but it feels like you forced your way out of that spot just for the sake of it
Anyway, the fallout or back to the present next?
I expected the ultimate outcome to this, but not the leadup to it. Dang. Well done.
I’m so glad you updated! I did not see that twist coming tho. Hope you get the next update out soon! Can’t wait to see where this goes.
I figured Sunset either ran away, committed suicide (she still might have) or was killed in an accident... I was really hoping for option #1...
Yeah, I guess the writing was always on the walls but still, once you get the actual confirmation...
Awesome chapter and a great rollercoaster of emotions
...wow. Just...wow. That was a gut-punch.
How old ARE Luna and Celestia?
I had figured thirties, but when rereading it, a couple chapters ago Celestia tells Sunset she lost her parents "almost two decades ago" in quotes, so presumably she was telling human Sunset that in the past. Which would make her 34-38. At her first job. Which was at least 12 years ago.
Look pretty good for 50 year olds.
Oof. I had expected death, but not Eros love AND suicide, at least that's the feeling I got from it considering the repeated mentions of a crappy home life.
Edit:Also the passage of time just seems murky in general after Sunset gets blasted. She seems pretty comfy with living with the sisters after what, 3 months? AND BOTH movies take place before Hearth's Warming?
of course. the trope of oh human Sunset is dead.
that end part just annoys me.
9972035
Huh. You are correct, that 'two decades' was an oversight on my part. That should be 'several years' since despite telling the story to pony Sunset in the current time (where 'two decades' would be accurate), the event in Celestia's story is less than ten years after losing her parents.
…………
Damn.
Geez. It's hard to see how Celestia will be able to have that daughterly bond with Pony!Sunset now that Pony!Sunset knows her human counterpart had a crush on her.
I can see why Celestia buried this stuff, with what happened at the end of this chapter, there's not really any way to get over it.
Also I feel sorry for Sombra. He just wanted to run a good school and keep the current students from being scattered across the district. But in the process he lost his wife. I have to wonder why Celestia didn't just get a job teaching at a neighboring public school, now that she's gotten some experience, and still stay married to him.
Pfft. Of course she got Truck-Kun'd.
9975774
Assuming that due to Human!Shimmy being dead'ed and her already compromised emotional state, Human!Tia lashed out at Human!Sombra, eventually resulting in them breaking up.
Also comes up is the question on how Human!Shimmy's parent's reaction to all this. If they are cold and indifferent, I fully expect Human!Tia to end up in jail for a bit for assault.
Also is going to be awkward for Pony!Shimmy's reaction to all this. Knowing your counterpart's feelings and relationship to your current adoptive mom is going to make things hella-weird.
Looking back at Act 1, one can imagine Celestia's inner turmoil when Sunset doesn't attend school after the massive 'break the haughty' moment, and that it takes forever to get in contact with her. And then disappears for hours because she gets in trouble the moment Celestia's back is turned, only for the police to contact her about Sunset.
damn...
Dammit, add another chapter!!!
I was afraid that this would be the result. It was becoming increasingly clear that Sunset was becoming way too attached. The poor girl really seemed to have absolutely nothing else. I have no idea what this will mean for Celestia's relationship with our Sunset. The best case is that it takes our favorite principal off of her pedestal and shows her to be every bit as fallible as other humans. But I fear it won't be that simple. Nice job as always.
Ouch.
Right I the feels. I hope there's another chapter at some point because this is a heck of a place to be left hanging. Great work as always.
As I always say half lies are only half the truth but partial truths are only part of the story
I want more...
OUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is this dead
Nooooo PLEASEEE CONTINUEEEE😭🙏 or is this series literally got killed by sunset?
I'm so sad this is how the story's been for the past few years, it was so good.
Hoping everything is going alright for you. Based off your blogposts and general comments, I doubt we'll be anything happening to this story anytime soon. Burnout and lack of motivation can absolutely suck, I'm just wishing you well.
Planning on a reread soon, it's been on my reread list for ages, I just love this story so much I'm always so afraid to reread it, and I don't know why.
I hate to say it, but this could be an issue. No student goes on any kind of school trip without a signed permission slip. It's been that way for a very long time. Short of it's a very lax school.
10682795
We did it Mr. Stark we won.
Pain and suffering is our reward.
9976394
Plot twist: As is the law for all who suffer death-by-truck, Sunset Shimmer was reincarnated into a fantasy world. However, she in particular was reincarnated without memories of her previous life, as a baby unicorn in a magical land called Equestria...