The Apple's Union

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Comments ( 15 )

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Aziraphael

Aziraphael #1 · Nov 3rd, 2014 · 3 · ·

I haven't read the story itself, but since you managed to misspell the title, not capitalize it properly, misspell your description, forget to capitalize proper nouns, forget the apostrophe in your chapter title, and not capitalize it properly either, I can't honestly say that I have high hopes for it.

Though your story should, obviously, be properly proofread before posting, you should make doubly sure that everything on the title page is accurate. It's the first impression people get, both of the story itself and of the quality of your writing in general, and if it's full of errors a lot of people will just leave a downvote and move on without reading. Also, people are generally more willing to excuse errors within the story itself if you leave a good first impression with the title page.

Manual Control

Manual Control #2 · Nov 3rd, 2014 · · ·

Wow. New story to Cancelled in just ten votes... That's somewhat disappointing.

SpookyPrincesssa

SpookyPrincesssa #3 · Nov 4th, 2014 · 2 · ·

Cancelled? Dang it! This could have been big bucks! YOU COULD HAVE MADE IT TO HOLLYWOOD STUDIOS, BABEH! Maybe...

jszellmer

jszellmer #4 · Nov 16th, 2014 · · ·

5223869 I'm gonna have to concur with you on this one.

The Yaoi Mistress

The Yaoi Mistress #5 · Nov 21st, 2014 · · ·

So... the MacDash is ever going to happen? or it will be in another story?

Warmachine

Warmachine #6 · Nov 21st, 2014 · 3 · ·

5295724 should i make another story on this? like a sequel?

The Yaoi Mistress

The Yaoi Mistress #7 · Nov 21st, 2014 · · ·

5296470 I don't know, it's up to you. I only want to know if it was gonna be another part or chapter. I got curious!

I would say, go for it

Seratina

Seratina #8 · Nov 23rd, 2014 · 3 · ·

Never dislike without saying why, I think it's pretty obvious this time. Grammar please.

KinkyPony

KinkyPony #9 · Nov 28th, 2014 · 3 · ·

Nice! I love how AJ is dedicated to satisfying her brother.

Applejack looked at how much of Mac's meat was still outside. Seeing that there was still a third left, she ignored her body's screaming protests as she put all of her force downward causing the cock inside of her to push past her defences and enter her cervix.

AJ shouldn't worry about a little sperm in her pussy. She'll never be able to have foals anyway.

Evil_Gumbo27

Evil_Gumbo27 #10 · Nov 29th, 2014 · 2 · ·

5321404 thanks for that. But tecnically she still could get knocked up. i never said that she wasn't in heat, and with how eager she was to "help" big mac, one can only assume the worst...