• Member Since 6th Jun, 2014
  • offline last seen February 24th

Journey Blue


It took a bit of kicking till the gears started ticking.


T
Source

Twilight, my Faithful Student, my friend, if there is anypony that can create a world of Harmony, true Harmony, it is you.

More than a thousand years ago, my sister and I sought to create a perfect world, a world ruled by Harmony. A world free of evil. We were powerful and believed ourselves above the laws that governed this world. But this world is governed by the laws of Magic, and Magic, it seems, demands balance.

Where there is Light, there is Darkness.
Where there is Order, there is Chaos.
For there to be Love, there must be Hate.
For every Dream, there is a Nightmare.
Each begets the other.

And like boiling water over a fire, each can extinguish the other.

I should not have been surprised when the day came that the evil I had to fight was my own sister. It was the world restoring the balance we so foalishly ignored.

Perhaps, it is for this balance that I now stay my hoof. I have chosen to have you,Twilight Sparkle, act in my stead as the evils I thought vanquished, inevitably return to Equestria. It is in hopes that you may learn this balance, that you may learn from my mistakes. It is not something I alone can teach you, when I myself still understand so little. It is why I must now rely on the help of an old nemesis.

He intends to take you away, my protégé, and make you his own. You must not succumb to his influence. Yet if you are to learn the balance that is at the essences of all things, it will be through him. For the future of Equestria and for the sake of Friendship, you must prevail.


I hope that some day you can forgive me.

Chapters (7)
Comments ( 56 )

Let us see where this story leads, hopefully the road it takes will be rough and untamed for the paved paths tend to be boring. Until the day it is clear which path you have chosen you have my attention.

Interesting. I will keep an eye on this. Not too sure, though, why you've gotten those dislikes. You do, however, tend to switch from present to past tense and vice versa. Moreover, I personally do not like a narrative being told in the present tense, but it is something I can get used to, I suppose.

One last thing:

Twilight had so easily beaten his traps.

It's probably my Sombra fanboyism showing through, but I think Twilight's actual performance in the Season 3 premiere says otherwise. But, I digress. It's hardly anything important.

Do carry on. I'd like to see what more you have in store for us.

she did learn of dark magic from Celestia though and she only cast after seeing Celestia cast it.

Celestia damn it, Fimfiction! Why did you not notify me of this story!?

Anyway, fantastic to see more of your writing. You have a way with words, and I'm eager to see what awaits.

Loving this story so much right now...

The way you are unfolding the story is wonderful. And I must once again praise you for your amazing writing style. It's stupendous.

5226061
I was wondering when I would hear for you.

Silly Twilight, you think you actually have a choice! You are simply a puppet who's strings are held by two different hoofs. Both of who want to put both hoofs on the rod the strings are attached to. There is nothing you can do, but wait and see if one of them make you look up at the faces of the ones moving you. Perhaps the strings will be cut, but even if you are released from the strings that bound you you will only fall unmoving on the black and white chessboard below you.

There is only one way out. It called death, you may want to take it before that option no longer exist. Some don't even have it.

Anyway I hope Sombra completely and utterly corrupts Twilly to the point she knows she is being used and dosen't care.

Comment posted by Journey Blue deleted Nov 9th, 2014

5245982 I have to agree with you on your comment...

Comment posted by Halfpaw deleted Nov 9th, 2014
Comment posted by Journey Blue deleted Nov 9th, 2014
Comment posted by Halfpaw deleted Nov 9th, 2014

This whole chapter was magnificent. Colorfully descriptive to the point where the whole scene might as well have been an episode of the show, and almost poetic in its dialogue. Sombra especially is masterful with his whole routine, even if it is obvious what his end goal is. In a way, that just makes him more sinister as a villain.
In short, this chapter has sold me. I eagerly await what comes next.

Bloody Khorne! This is great, keep it up!

I thought I had started tracking this! I guess I was wrong. Anyway, another excellent chapter. The storytelling, dialogue, and descriptions flowed so naturally, you definitely got the Twilight and Sombra's personalities right. I love your "re-telling" of sorts of the original comic, adding further detail to it and making it more original.
You are an extremely talented writer, and I know you have something big planned for this.
I await what is to come.

5286936
Always a pleasure to hear from you.

Just a little heads up, I'll be posting the next chapter this Friday evening.

Another fantastic chapter. A wonderful mix of story-building and lighthearted humor (I really like Cinder's character). I once again must praise your writing style and pacing, it manages to describe everything in detail, from character thoughts to environments, while not feeling overbearing in the process. Keep up the terrific writing.

I love the idea of the Cinderfern. Very nice chapter.

very nice chapter
but i wonder if Sombra will appear soon

Four days until the Summer Sun—One sun rising, another setting.

SOON...

I cannot put into words how much I am loving this story.

comment..yes i have a comment more please...more now i need to know what twilight found..what it meaans its going to plague my mine until the next chapter

Sombra's playing mind games. I love it when villains play mind games, especially when what they're saying leaves both the character and audience uncertain of what to believe. This chapter is an example of that. I noticed a few grammatical errors, but besides that, this is just as high quality as the previous chapters. I'm always happy to see this story be updated, and happily await what is to come.

the eyes are either talking about discord or other more sinister versions of discord, that or the tree is bottling up the entirety of tarturas itself and she just found tirek

So far so good, I always love puppet shows. :ajsmug:

Quite interesting. A pegasus that can turn into a plant, a creature down beneath the tree...

I must admit I let out an excited "Squee" when I saw that this had been updated.
Twilight's entire dream sequence was brilliant, and the story about the Four Sisters and the Prince of Lore was just great. Was this the "truth" Sombra wanted to show her?

I also apologize for never getting back to you on those messages, life intervened. I'll send you a message later.

5703130

I wouldn't say he showed her. I would say he pointed her in the right direction, and allowed her find out for herself—the hard way.

I'm glad you liked the new chapter.

5703202 This isn't the end right

This is so good but that felt like an ending and as great as it was I don't want it to be because that was so good

5703542

No, it's not the end. These chapters I've been calling Introductions are like Part 1 of the story, Prerequisites being like a prelude. I meant to be on the next part of the story by now (which I plan to call Lessons, as sort of an academic theme), but worldly obligations have delayed me. If you know of any graduating college seniors taking 21 hours in an engineering major, four of which are labs, you can probably understand the nature of such delays.

5704224

That being said, it will probably take some time for me to finish the next chapters.

5704224 preaching to the quire

I wish you best of luck

I just read this out loud and it sounds amazing. Keep up the great story telling/writing

5706145 It's funny you mention reading this out loud. Prior to writing fiction, the only things I wrote of any merit were publics speeches. One of the reasons for my writing style being the way it is, is because I imagine it being told aloud by a storyteller.

5707170 well I usually don't read stories out loud to myself.:twilightsmile:, but I just felt like it because I thought it would sound great if I read it out loud, and well it did.:twilightsmile: plus I like the way u write its just amazing.

I had read some of your prior work, "That Which Plagues the Mind," before it had been cancelled. Imagine my pleasant surprise when I found this.

The style that you use while creating this story has an intriguing appeal, as I myself have not read anything with one that is similar. It has articulate depiction allowing for a clearer understanding, whilst also getting to the point. I certainly look forward to the rest of this story, as well as any others, should you choose to create more.

6068809
Ooh, a compliment. Even after all this time, they still make my day.

I probably should have changed this story's status to hiatus , considering it has been 13 weeks since the last post, and I fear I've gotten rusty. But hopefully I'll be able to post one or two chapters by July, along with a few other stories I've been working on.

I've been sort of binge writing since my summer began.

Comment posted by Penguin Lagann deleted February 20th

5231292 He does seem to be the main commenter here.

5300160 And the ever free began its assault on the world of ponies.

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