Going to comic-con. Didn't think I'd end up in equestria that for sure. Can't eat food, Can't drink anymore. Hell I can't even sleep. Well I guess that not true I do sleep but only for two days a month.
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Someone else with mad ambitions trying to make undead steam monstrosities?
This is getting good!
5477643 Thank you
5481657 okay
This is awesome!!
5483600 thanks
me like
more please
5490512 np I'll get right on that
5490893 thank you
this was amazing the only bad thing is I have little to no clue what any thing the lich says but simple hell jacks is
You need to fire your pre-reader/editor. Repeated spelling and grammar mistakes all over the place.
Im not really all that bothered by grammar (but if you improve it would probably help make more interested in the story) so I find this entertaining enough to keep Reading but what I can't look past is when the story lacks details , since words is the entire story (unless you add Pictures but that is lazy) any story who wants to be good are in desperate of DETAILS .
With that being said what happened with the undead that was attacking the trade den? The ones at the entrance got away but what about those who were deeper in the den (the ones he snuck past)? Did they make it out? And if not did the other Diamond dogs take care of it? or is the reason Kat and Bronze Fang decided to join (yes I read the next chapter hoping to get answers) because a majority in the trade den is dead?
Again love the story and while this is not all that important I wanted to give you some constructive criticism, I wish you luck and hope you have a good day .
The story I like, though the grammar and spelling is really making it hard to enjoy as much as I would, otherwise it's looking quite good.
Holy horse feed! That was intense!
I really hate seeing cocky bastards trying to shoot for world domination. It's not possible on Earth, where we have advanced technology at our disposol. The closest anyone has ever gotten is with The Mongolians, and they fell apart once Ghengis Khan died.
Looks like Asphyxious has some bitches to choke to get his pages back.
Okay whats that? Equestrian merchant?