• Member Since 17th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen Jul 6th, 2013

All American


<Pending editing. I know there are errors and they will be dealt with later when I am not so lazy.>

What would you do if you spent every day getting mocked by a creature in the mirror? What would you do if you spent every day doubting your sanity? What would you do if your reality fell apart around you? My name is Ryan and this is my story.
-A big hand to frieD195 for being my beta-reader!
-The cover art is by Frees

Chapters (42)
Comments ( 882 )

"Ryan has had enough. He has spent 21 years of his life alone, forgotten, and unloved"
Okay, stop it right there.

This is a PAINFULLY standard HIE fic, isnt it? Do I even need
to read this to understand what is going to happen?

From what I've read so far, it seems pretty compelling. I mean, I've had those kinds of thoughts before so I can at least understand where the character (and the author) are coming from. It seems he believes celestia and Luna are halucinations. Tracking to see where this goes.

I found it quite interesting, it might not be perfect or "unique", but who cares, it got potential in my book. I'll keep an eye on this.

De Storm: DIS GON B GUUD *puts chair down*
Me:*Sniffle* some one has finnally described my life story.:fluttershysad:

God he's going to be so pissed when they save him. I for one am perfectly fine with self termination. And I'm looking forward to a Ryan being cold, cynical, mean, depressed, jerk and etc. I hope you don't follow the norm and have Ryan change and be a better person as soon as he arrives in Equestria. Because that is extremely annoying. Because I can see him immediately trying to kill himself, yelling at Princess Celestia and Luna for interfering with "HIS" life and"HIS" decisions. I for one would go to extreme lengths for payback. But then again I hate people.

Tagged 'Romance'. Something tells me you'll end up disappointed. Then again, romance is hell in itself, so maybe not.

As a Guardsmen I will be watching you, watch what you do in our world.


Respect the rule, or fall beneath it.


I hope that's the good kind of shock.

Been listening to this song for the second chapter: Johnny Cash "God's Gonna Cut You Down"

493458 me too point i see non bwahaha all that shit
thank you author you are writting what will probably be the end of my life (without the ponies and such) hazzah whatever anywho I'm tracking to see where this gos


Awful start, this is always how it begins. Human sad. Human dies or human brought to Equestria through either deliberate or accidental means. Human happy. Shipped with a pony, not considering the bestiality. Please prove my assumption wrong.

|| What he/she said ||

Anyway, even if it is a really depressed hie, I like where it is going.
Favorite and thumb up.


to answer your questions in order; yes, yes, no (at least not for the majority of the story), and maybe (not going to spoil and if there is there will be no explicit detail).

The HiE market is saturated and originality is hard to come by. I find it hard to write anything but HiE since I'm only human and I know how they work.

Still, no need to be so harsh.

493881 Sorry if I came off as being too harsh. It's just my nature about fanfiction now. I now how hard it is to write original HiE, I've tried. Anyway, upon rereading, I saw potential. I'll reconsider my stance on the next chapter.


You give me too much credit. I just hope I can meet everyone's expectations.

*scrolls up and realizes that there is 49 notifications.


And now I wait and see what will become of this.... :twilightangry2: I hate waiting..

People complain how all the HiEs start the same...Trying coming up with a new idea after every other aurther has. The begining is always the same, but the middle and end are the best part.

I've been in the dumps (and done stuff I really shouldn't do) + had my own share of shitty relationships; I for one do sympathize with Ryan. Interesting start to the story; let us see how it unfolds.

Something tells me there's going to be fireworks when he arrives.
493244 As a matter of fact, you do. It's not standard at all.


I'm still waiting on my prereader but all I can say is 'Jason Bourne'.

504306 Never watched those movies or read the novels.

I definately want MOAR!:flutterrage:

Edit: Oh! I weild the mighty Scythe of the First

504469 scythe one of the most epic weapons ever also I have a feeling that this story is only gonna make my death more likely yet I continue to read oh well (Oh also this note is to author don't bother yourself about this I already made up my mind before reading this story so it aint your fault it mine for the most part the other part is all the ass holes that decided my life needed to be crappy)

504596 yeAH i'm serain't true suicide in the fact that I'm not killing myself I'm just trying to get killed how I'm going about this I'm stayin outside in the nearby forest for two days killing anything I can and hoping it fights back if I'm lucky (In my oppinion) i die if I live whatever I can try again another time

Book! Hate Celestia. I would have killed her. Looking forward to how this unfolds. Hopefully he'll hold onto his gun. And he better not change, because this friendship crap that changes people is a load of bull. Ones life doesn't change for the better once life changes abruptly, especially if you find up in some fairy tale land. Since Celestia is trying to make him see the 'good' in life and that's bull. She wants him to change in this perfect world (Equestria) then she'll send him back to his horrible life. And then there's the fact Equestria is driven by magic and technology is near no existent...it's a back water planet. I'd kill myself very quickly, I don't like anyone controlling my life, shape it, or medal in my life like Celestia is. I'd end it just to spite her and get the last laugh!


The hate... yes let it flow through you.

on a serious note, why do you hate Celestia so much?

EDIT: I would go to Equestria in a heartbeat. I can live without technology, plus the only tech I care for is guns and I am a gunsmith in real life. That means I could just create more given enough time.

504626 hey dumbass a stupid hug video aint going to change my mind no amount of hugs real or virtual will change my mind guess what my dad is an ass and if he punishes us the way he wants too he'll kill me and my siblings my mom is going to die unless she has lung surgery and she could die during that and I found out she may need heart surgery along with that people have hated me since I was in kindergarten the only people who bother being nice are on the internet so I'm thinking that when people see me they hate me thats just the way it is I'm the person that everyone gets to hate upon to get popular guess what else even if my mom has the surgeries we may not have enough money to keep both our house and buy food so I'm trying to find a way to enjoy life before I go and blow out my brains or some other form of suicide so I'm letting fate decide upon my life it will decide if I die in may for I have no control over nature if it kills me then fate has taken my life


Hey bro, I know the feel. I grew up with my mother and father happily until they got divorced and I found out my mother was gay. I ended up moving 1,000 miles from all of my family with my father. Not soon after, he began to drink and become mentally abusive until the day I moved out. I never let that get through to me and I soon went to VCU and fought my way through teeth and nail. I soon graduated with a mechanical engineering degree and got my dream job.

My point is this: Life gets better when you fight for it and stick through the bad times. I did it and so can you. Keep calm, carry on my brother.

504687 meh you say that now people have been saying it since first grade hasn't improved I'm also thirteen so I'm pretty sure letting fate decide is the best choice right now

*Breaths in a lot of oxygen* Yay! <-- see what I did there? XD anyway great chapter! I want to continue reading but there isn't anymore to read :(


I'm gona level with you; life doesn't not get better until you move out. That is my advice to you. As soon as you turn 18, pack you shit and leave. Never look back.

Look man, I tried to help you but as far as you are concerned, I'm just text on your computer screen. I just want you to know that there are people out there that care and I'm one. Never give up and always carry on.

Celestia damn man thirteen I have already lost too many friends to what you are feeling two of which face to face... Ever see a kid blow his brains out in front of you? Its not pretty how many times it happens, not for me, his family or even his school mates. Go get some help in a friend you trust or even parents. Do leave this world in such a way as to drag others into the pit of despair. Go on to youtube and watch wristcutters a love story it speaks to the heart and with truth. Also I am 21.

504720 again fate all that shit it will only get worse when my mom dies so I'm letting whatever being that controls nature or fate decide if I die so yeah


We all have our moments of hardship, but that is the test of humanity's stake in this world. Keep pushing forward no matter the cost because even if your life is not brighter you can still try to bring light into the lives of others. No I am not religious, and yes I am fucking optimistic, why the fuck not. I mean really I have my fair share of shit and try not to bring it to others. May the Bass be with you.


I'm hater. And I just don't like Cemestia at all. And that's so cool! You make guns! What types can you make?! Shotguns, assault rifles, machine guns? Also do you make bullets too?

And if you started making guns in Equestria I'm sure you'd get in serious trouble. But I'd use the greatest excuse ever. I'd say, "I'm preparing for the zombie apocalypse!?

504738 friends gone turned into those who spite me just to gain popularity familiy hate me tell me what I have to live for I have nothing nothing but the food I eat and the clothes I wear and the dark emotions that within in my blackened soul tell me what I have to live for


I work for Smith and Wesson and I do general work. When ever they need to pick up the slack in one area, they send me. I've worked on everything from .22 to LMGs. Also, ammo isn't that hard to make. All you need is a cast for the bullets, nitroglycerin for the primers, and some basic chemicals for the gunpowder.

EDIT: Ryan will never lose his gun.


Awesome. I'm completely jealous of that.


Hey, it didn't just fall into my lap. I needed to go through collage and get a degree in mechanical engineering (lots o' math). It wasn't easy but I did it.

Then set your own course let none stop you.

505314 I'f I decided to I have nothing to live for having nothing to live for you survive better if I was old enough I'd probably join the military just to kill people that is what my may is for to A. die or B. kill things in spite and anger

It's funny, I don't even know you, yet you seem a lot like me when I was in the fourth grade. I actually contemplated killing myself when wasn't even 13 years old just because I had people around me that made fun of me for being fat or being smarter than them and calling me a nerd or whatever. I got some psych counseling and eventually decided against it. From what I've seen of your comments here, it seems you feel you're stuck in a hopeless situation. When I got older, I realized that the only reason I was ever in that situation in the first place was because I unwittingly put myself into those situations because I didn't know that I could DO anything else. When I finished high school, I started coming out of my shell, and when I got into college I was able to shed that former, pathetic, sad excuse of a person I used to be and become far more outgoing than I ever thought I could be. Doing so has allowed me to follow my dreams of being a geologist and getting a job doing what I love.

You may think you have it tough and that no one understands the specific situation your in, but your wrong....way more wrong than you will likely ever be for the rest of your life. I don't know how old you are and frankly I don't think it matters. You seem young, and from your comments, you are placing most of the blame for your life on everyone else but yourself. I don't mean to be harsh, but MAN THE FUCK UP! Take control of your own damn life and stop letting others fuck it up for you! You may live at home with your parent(s) (like me) and still be going too school and may or may not have a job (also like me), but that doesn't mean you have to give up just because you don't have the ideal fantasy life where everything is fucking sunshine and rainbows.

To put it simply, the world fucking sucks! Ponies and MLP:FIM brighten it up a little, but turning things around is gonna depend on how much effort you are willing to put in living. Become the master of you own fate, YOU decide how you want to live your life, not others! Don't be a coward and take the easy way out because of something like "I'm sad because people made fun of me!". There are literally millions of people like you in the U.S. alone. Quit trying to grab attention by being all dark and brooding and "suicidal". The people who actually go through with it don't ever talk about it until they write the suicide note because they know someone will stop them and ultimately cause them to question if life is really that bad. So get off your lazy, brooding ass and actually DO SOMETHING to change your situation!

I apologize if this all sounds like some crazy rant, but whenever I see someone spouting off about how sad or shitty their life is, it reminds me of how pathetic and ignorant and stupid I used to be and my vision literally tunnels as a blindingly white-hot rage courses through me. I know now that you CAN change your situation. You wanna let some anger out? Get a punching bag and beat the shit out of it! Fucking go to a gym and release the pent-up frustration lifting weight or something. Maybe go jogging until your feet bleed. Just do something! The fact that you are supposedly staying out near a forest hoping to find some poor animal that would be strong enough to kill you is just sad and weak. What did they do to you? I hope for your sake and the sake of those around you, that you either stop and take a long, introspective look at yourself and realize how childish you're behaving OR someone finds you and commits you to a psych ward until you learn that killing animals to vent anger is not healthy.

Wow, I even had trouble writing that because I felt like I wanted to put my fist through my monitor. I think I'm going to go have a cookie or something and watch some How It's Made episodes on Hulu or something. :pinkiesad2:

Then write a story about how much life sucks and kill Celestia.

506489 as you put it man the fuck up I do that every day to preserve my life okay manning the fuck up isn't turning your life around at least not for me these bullies most of them used to be my friends which makes it so much worse and now it is not my choice it is fates if fate wants the coyetes to kill me I die if fate wants me to live I get coyete stew and the killing animals injurying something brings satisfactionto me punching a punching bag ain't gonna do it it ain't gonna do it even after my hands start to bleed and spite is a wonderful emotion most see it dark and evil that's because it is but it helps me I've taken wooden swords made wood spears I've tried to find hobbies the only hobbies that help are ones I'm not aloud to do video games help me my family doesn't care they know about this they send me to councilars who use the fake speeches of oh I understand I can help you they piss me off I have always known if people actually cared about me it has been a sixth sense most of my life it leads me to the few people that are willing to be my friend that's when I pay less attention to their feelings towards me eventually they decide its not worth being around me its better to be popular oh and you can call me phycotic all you want I already know this I have split personalities I've had different ones all my life their my personality focused in different areas I have serious spite issues I will not murder sentients without reason understand that but if someone tries to hurt me physically that I'm able to stand up to I will even if I have to kill them

All future responses from me will be via Private Message from now on concerning this issue. I don't want to shit up this guys stories with my crazy ranting comments.

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