I Can't Work On This Farm! It's Too Hard!
She hadn’t moved from the spot, continuing to stare at the objects in front of her; Mike had placed her in front of a cow and a bucket. “It’s simple!” He had told her, “All you have to do is grab the udder of the cow, give a slight squeeze, and pull down.”
“And...this will give us milk? Are you sure about this?” Vinyl was dumbfounded. She had never seen a pony grab a cow’s underparts, let alone drink what emerged from those depths. She was reluctant to try this, but if it was what Mike had wanted, it could only be the right thing to do. As he had walked out, he only gave her one warning.
“Watch out for the back hooves and make sure you don’t get hit in the face!” Slamming the door of the barn shut, he left Vinyl to her work, which hadn’t even begun. She was anxious enough about doing work on this dump, and “milking a cow” wasn’t making it to the top of her favorite list.
“All right...cow...bear with me and we’ll both be fine. All I need to do is fill this one bucket with your milk, and then I can spend the rest of the day relaxing!” She reached a hoof very shakily towards the udder of the cow, who stood at the window eating a big mouthful of grass, fresh from the feeding trough Mike had always sat at to get the cream he would use in his products.
As her hoof touched the udder, she closed her eyes, using the other one to grab onto one of the tentacles that was attached to this disgusting mass. Vinyl almost threw up in her mouth at just the touch. “I-I can’t do this! MIIIIIKKKKKEEEEE!”
They met outside of the barn, Vinyl still shivering as Mike shook his head at her. “So now we know never to make you do that again. I’ll go in and do it, and I want you to go collect eggs from the chicken coop. I think you know how to collect eggs, right? Don’t scare the chickens; That’s all you need to know!”
Vinyl shook away her fear, straightening up again. “Fine, but afterwards I get to show you an easy way to relax! Deal?”
They shook hoof and hand on it, Vinyl walking off as Mike opened the door of the barn.
The coop was a cacophony of noise, feathers flying and chickens clucking. The dominant animal in the coop, Vinyl, had obviously not flustered them as much with her presence as she did with her hooves under their butts. “Don’t any of you make eggs! I think you need some music; I heard it helps when you need to concentrate!”
She didn’t know what it meant to collect the eggs, but she knew how they were made. She lifted each hen very carefully, checking for any sign of the small life forms they would have created. After the first two, Vinyl was agitated. It was obvious that none of these stupid hens had anything to offer her, so what difference did it make if she checked them all? She assured herself that the next hen would be the last one she checked.
Grabbing it by both wings with her hooves, she lifted the chicken, gasping. Right there, in the nest, there was a small egg, full of life and deliciousness! She threw the hen behind her, a loud squeaking sound coming from the chicken as it hit the side of the coop. Vinyl took into account that it would make a good noise for her next song, grabbing the egg between both of her hooves, using her magic to hover the egg-collecting basket next to her hooves. Holding her hooves and the egg over the basket, she reached down to gently let it drop in, only to have the egg break into mush all over her hooves.
“Eeeeeww, what is this!?” The syrupy liquid felt cold in Vinyl’s hooves; She watched as the yolk inside slid down her hoof and through the wooden boards. It wasn’t often that she found herself eating uncooked eggs. Already disgusted, Vinyl continued on with the task, using her magic for everything after that.
When she came out of the coop, she was covered in feathers. Luckily her task was over. She was about ready to pass out; she wasn’t used to this much work. When she walked into the house, all she could hear was a dead silence. Setting the basket on the counter, she began to call out. “Mike? I finished with the chickens...messily...can I go to bed now?”
When no response came back, Vinyl’s thoughts began to race around. “Well, I didn’t hear a no!” Charging through the hallways, she began to kick open doors, rushing to find the bathroom so she could cleanse herself of the icky things she was covered in.
At the front door, Mike was coming in as a door slammed down the hall; Mike hadn’t heard Vinyl nor seen her since he had sent her to collect eggs from his hens. “I didn’t think that was that hard…” He set his flannel shirt on the chair, looking around and spotting the basket full of eggs lying on the counter. Vinyl heard Mike call out to
Of course Vinyl had heard Mike calling, but she was not going to answer back; At least, she wouldn’t answer back until she took a nice, warm shower. Using a small magic spell she turned the knobs on the shower, taking off her shades. Blinking a few times, her eyes adjusted to the brightness of the room. A smile creeping up on her face, she carefully stepped into the balmy water, a groan escaping her lips. This was probably the best thing she had felt on her body in a while. She never got the chance to take showers back in Equestria; She was always either sleeping or playing some concert. Most ponies didn’t care, given they were also sweaty and dirty during her concerts.
The only pony that seemed to notice was Octavia. Vinyl sometimes thought that Tavi washed her during her sleep.
Feeling the water run down her back, she felt electricity in her body. This was almost exactly like the time that Octavia had taught Vinyl how to play the cello; Those were the days…”Tavi, why can’t I just see you!? Just once…”
Looking up from the ground, Vinyl jumped back about three inches, given the small space she had within the shower space. Octavia stood right in front of her, reaching a hoof out that passed straight through Vinyl. “Vinyl!? VINYL!” The figure ran towards Vinyl, dissipating into a fine mist under the water.
But that was Octavia! Vinyl saw her. It was like her prayers had been answered. To Vinyl, it looked more like an apparition created by the steam from the shower, but the unmistakeable bowtie that Tavi always kept on herself told Vinyl that it was Octavia.
“T-Tavi!” -Vinyl blinked in confusion- “Is that you!? Tavi? Tavi!!” Octavia had just been in front of her, but now she was gone; Was Vinyl seeing things? Was Octavia…
She refused to even think of that. There had to be a more logical explanation as to how Octavia ended up in the same place as Vinyl at the exact same time that she was taking a shower. Too afraid to move, Vinyl sat down in the shower, the water dripping down her face as she shed tears for her long-lost friend and potential lover.
As time passed, Vinyl could feel the steamy warmth on her coat. The bottoms of her hooves were starting to shrivel, but she couldn’t move. Was that the opportunity? Could she have done something in that one moment to bring herself back to Ponyville, to her home with Octavia? Vinyl didn’t know; what she did know was that she couldn’t give up. She needed to find a way back.
When she finally had the energy to stand up, Vinyl turned the water off and hovered a towel over her head, shaking it furiously through her mane, as well as her coat, to dry it. The cloth felt rough on her head; It hurt when she rubbed it over her mane. Each wince of pain sent a searing heat to her entire body.
Stepping out of the bathroom, Vinyl glanced up to view Mike, who had fallen asleep on a folding chair in front of the bathroom. Nudging him with her hooves, he shook his head, the drool flying across the room, the wall in the bathroom becoming coated with saliva.
“Dammit Vinyl, you were in there forever! What happened!?” Vinyl looked down, saddened.
“Sorry, Mike...just remembering an old friend who I probably won’t be able to see again.” She started to walk away, a pat causing her coat to stand on edge. Mike was petting her, and Vinyl was frozen in place. Her hooves felt nailed to the ground, and her body was stiffened, only her eyes daring to move. “W-what are you doing!?”
“I’m comforting you, dummy...just accept it and we’ll get back to work.” Vinyl didn’t care about the work; The comfort she felt being pet reminded her of Octavia, and Vinyl was fine with treating Mike as Tavi. Scooting back into Mike’s arms, Vinyl snuggled her head into his lap.
“Thank you so much, Mike...I know you don’t like me, but it means so much to me that I can be here now...I just miss her so much!”
“Shhh...I know, Vinyl...just please…” In truth, Vinyl wasn’t the only one experiencing something new. She could also feel the change in Mike, as if he felt different with her in his arms. It wasn’t different in the sense of being weird; it was just the right thing to do. It was true that he didn’t like the thought of talking ponies, but Vinyl knew that she was different. She could be compassionate if she actually wanted to. She wasn’t as much of a bother as Mike had originally thought her to be.
“Goodness Vinyl, could you be more of a bother!?” -This had been the last straw for Octavia.- “Do you think you can just continue through life living like you are? Someday it will all catch up to you, and I’ll be left alone with memories of a drunken bastard who thought that they were cooler than everypony else!”
“Tavi, can you shut it for just one minute!? You think I can’t handle myself, don’t you? I’m just some big baby that you have to take care of? I’m Vinyl Scratch, dammit, and I wish you treated me like a friend!” Vinyl hated when Octavia judged her; Vinyl could live life however she wanted. Ponies didn’t get sent to the moon for having a fun time, right?
“Since you think you’re such a big shot, let’s see how you survive without your maid around! I’m leaving, Vinyl!” Vinyl’s eyes narrowed as she watched Octavia come out of their room with a briefcase trailing behind her in a cart. As Octavia slammed the door shut, Vinyl shouted out after her.
“Good riddance!”
Maybe she was bothersome.
As Vinyl’s tears slowed down and both had gone through heavy thinking, Mike let go, both leaving the house towards the fields.
The corn towered over Vinyl Scratch.
“All right, so we’re going to take all of this corn and tear it down. I think you can deal with a simple tool, as I don’t think you could handle a tractor. I think you’ll handle the scythe just as fine. All you have to do is knock it down, and I’ll pick it back up. We’re going to do three acres, and then the rest of the day, however much is left, will be ours!”
Vinyl nodded, determined to finish this day off as her horn lit up. The weapon flew up in front of her and she grinned. “Time for a lesson in music, you crazy corn!” The beat in her head powered up, her eyes zipping left and right with each bob of her head. With each pump of her head bass, the scythe cut another strip through the vegetation.
The plants fell as trees to the ground, wind aiding in the harvesting. Today, Mike and Vinyl were children of the corn, happy to finally see each other approaching the middle of the field. Vinyl was surprised that she was going just as fast as Mike and his machine, but unicorns had magic which seemed to work almost as quickly as man-made machines, especially when working to a rhythm.
As they came to a halt at the center of the corn, Vinyl took the last chop, watching as the stalk of corn swooshed to the ground. “Yay! Finally done...now you have to live up to your promise and let me teach you wubs! Well, the best way I can without any equipment…”
Mike sighed, nodding in agreement. “Well, first we need to go fetch the daily mail along with the newspaper. I’ll read the top stories and then you can teach me your...wubs.”
The mailbox seemed to take eons to reach; Upon arriving, Mike found himself to be disappointed at the lack of mail he had received. Checking the newspaper, though, his eyes went wide. “Vinyl, you have to check this out...right now!” Vinyl took the newspaper with her magic, bringing it close enough to read the small print on the parchment.
Mysterious Pony Cosplayer Still At Large
Yesterday evening, what witnesses say they saw as a “pony” went into an alley shop in hopes to buy an energy drink. He was caught on tape stealing this beverage, instead paying with gold coins, and has evaded the police with the help of an unknown accomplice.
With the wide event known as Bronycon plaguing our wonderful city of Baltimore, we can only hope that this criminal is brought to justice soon. He appears to be small; small enough to fit inside of a pony costume fit to scale. Police say that the culprit’s hair is an electric blue, but they also swear that they saw an actual pony in comparison to the cosplayers gathered outside of the Convention Center.
As Detective Brown states, “The mouth of this horse was moving. If any costume can do that, it’d be freaking amazing. This was no damn cosplayer; what we saw out there was a talking horse!”
The origins of said pony are unknown, but our BPD swears to catch this culprit within the coming week, before Bronycon ends. We can only hope that nothing worse happens to Baltimore. Suspects are being taken in as cosplayers revolt against the tyranny against bronies.
“We are not just stupid animal lovers! We only believe in love throughout the land!
“You can’t arrest us during Bronycon!
“It was me! I’m the mysterious Vinyl Scratch! Take me away, officers!”
With all of these conflicting sides of the argument, there is only one hope for Baltimore: We must arrest all bronies.
“W-what!? I’m being hunted!? Mike, what’s going on!? I paid for my energy drink! Two bits!” Vinyl was going nuts. She wasn’t used to people wanting to get her; She rarely had a pony bring a gun to her concert!
“Vinyl...there’s no need to worry. I’m not well known in the town for jumping across buildings. They won’t find you, I promise. Just stay low and everything will be fine, okay?” Vinyl nodded, her face contorting with anger. She didn’t mean to hurt anypony, much less ruin a whole concert! With all of these humans loving her, she felt bad making them go to some mysterious place to be questioned.
“I actually feel worse for all those bronies that got their con ruined...that seems to be their only real time to talk with each other and socialize in the real world.”
Vinyl felt just as bad. “Mike, can we please just go back and rest? I don’t think I’ll show you any wubs tonight; Maybe tomorrow, if it’s okay with you?”
Mike smiled down at Vinyl, his voice soft. “It’s okay, Vinyl; We actually don’t have any work to do tomorrow, so you have all day to show me how to groove.”
Vinyl’s horn glowed, the light radiating off of the trees around and the warmth emanating throughout both bodies. Mike looked down, the light engulfing his body as he found himself being lifted into the air; As scared as he was, he was also having a great quantity of fun. As they walked, well, floated, back to the house, Vinyl remembered more from that night, that fateful concert that brought her here to Baltimore.
The bass was pumping through the crowd, bottles flying through the air.
“Turn the bass up, Vinyl! Let’s party!” Vinyl was dizzy enough, pushing all of the buttons on the soundboard until the music blasted at full volume; It was possible that all of Equestria could see the lasers through the building. Her vision was blurred and Vinyl looked around, spotting an unidentifiable mare in the corner of the room, looking intently at Vinyl Scratch.
“Hey, looks like somepony wants a little bit of me…” She burped, staggering over to the pony, much larger than Vinyl. She looked the mare up and down, spotting the wings and the horn clear as daylight, the rest of the pony invisible to Vinyl’s eyes. Her hooves went around the mare’s shoulders.
“So, darling, I see you’re an alicorn! Wanna hook up with the best music maker in Equestria?” The mysterious mare jumped back, freaked out at the sudden coming on of Vinyl Scratch. Vinyl saw a bright light, her vision turning black.
“Mike, I know how I got here! We need to rush home quickly!”
Vinyl ran, Mike floating in the distance behind her. “Slow down, Vinyl!”
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I assume... the best princess, Luna!
It was at night, she'd be the only one awake during these hours, so therefore, my hypothesis is complete.
I did notice a single spelling error however. You put "yopu" instead of "you". Don't want you to miss that, so I'll just tell you now.
There it is. Anyways, until next time good sir!
5201344 Well, it could be many things; Lyra could be an influence...but I don't remember if it actually states that she does. Since it's set in our world, the objects are directly stated. Though, I will assume from what I've been writing that she doesn't directly know what it is, but it looks like other objects in Equestria, such as the taxicabs in Manehattan. So she just assumes it's dangerous to stand in front of one. So, the answer, from me, will be taxicabs in Manehattan.
...I... I can't explain, how great this story is. So, here's a video.
5237558 finally somepony understands!
5237558 Ikr! Her voice is perfect for Vinyl, she should actually play Vinyl, and Elimonty should play Octavia and not whoever played her in Rainbow Rocks.
5338524 Haha well, I'm doing a Christmas fic right now as I type this, but I will continue the next chapter of this afterwards! And yes!! Thank you!!!
5364874 Ok and your welcome.
It's highly unlikely someone stealing an energy drink would lead to people getting accosted at a nearby convention... Actually unless a cop was literally right there, it's doubtful the police would do anything. It's just not worth it for a 3 dollar theft. Waste of police resources and all that. Especially if said person was wearing a "costume" that makes finding their identity nearly impossible.