Hive Mind

by canonkiller

Alternate Ending 1: Retribution

FOR ALL INTENSIVE PURPOSES, 1416 IS NOT GAY AND THINGS HAPPENED PRIOR TO THIS

I felt my body changing, tears virtually evaporating as my skin grew hot.

"You are nothing!" Chrysalis hissed.

I closed my eyes, drawing all the energy left behind from the blast into my horn.

"How did you think you could defeat me?" The Queen laughed.

"I didn't think we could." I growled.

Chrysalis frowned. "Really?"

My eyes snapped open, and I could see the shimmering light reflecting off my muzzle as I glared up at her. Flames erupted along my wings, spreading to at least triple my height, fanning out on either side. My mane and tail lit with the blaze as well, billowing like a curtain.

I shot up from the ground, hooking Chrysalis with a hoof and soaring up. I stilled to a hover, staring her dead in the eyes.

"I knew we could."

I began slowly flapping my wings, starting to roll in a small loop. Chrysalis struggled to free herself, only searing her shell on the flame. The speed increased as the loop tightened, until I was barely moving from a single spot.

"Nopony will miss you." I hissed, and threw her down.

The momentum launched her down, punching through a few clouds. Her wings strained to open, to slow her fall. I was too high up, she would recover before hitting the ground.

With a snarl, I darted through the tunnels she had made, catching up in mere heartbeats. I matched her speed, pressing my hooves down on her neck, and sped up again. The air bent around me, the suction behind me bordering unsafe.

I flapped harder, faster, feeling Chrysalis's heartbeat through my hooves. And then, just as fast, I pulled up. The air tunnel broke, and the compressed force wheeled me away.

The resounding thud told me the Changeling Queen was not as lucky.

I rose up, level with the Changeling army.

"Just go home."

Comments

[VX]

WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG???

also: like my new pic?

[Changeling]

Alternate ending 1? does that mean there is going to be more? lots of endings!

[canonkiller]

956006

Procrastination, and yes.

957244

A few more, yes. Well, probably just one more.

[VX]

958323 thanks for the compliment

also: i know that feel bro, I havent even finished half a chapter yet

[canonkiller]

1583476

It's not 'potential' if the story is over.

[Ekevoo]

A really interesting plot, intriguing world building... I was completely, completely, COMPLETELY hooked after the second chapter. Then millions of characters got tossed into the story without proper characterization, and I plodded through to the end without caring much about any of them. What could be a very epic moment at the final chapter, I read it with almost complete indifference. Also, by then, I felt quite irked at the fact that the protagonist's fourteen years of being human were of no consequence to their personality and world-view through most of the story. Please please please improve your characterization, and work with fewer characters next time. Your plot and world-building are great.

[canonkiller]

2074184

By the end of this, I just wanted it to be done. I had other projects I wanted to work on, but enough people cared about this story to make me finish it. I think I improved when I wrote Sin and Wired. If you want to read something with horrible everything, try Autumn. Actually, don't. But thank you for the compliments, and I'll try to improve on my weaknesses in my future works.

[Ekevoo]

2074718 Fair enough, this is indeed older. I'm queuing these for later. Cheers!

[canonkiller]

3895373

I know. It's really not one of my best works. I'm even ashamed to put it in a worst list. Maybe the "let's pretend this never happened" list. I've written much, much better stories.

[mad haxz]

3352496 so is thisencrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcR7ufjAx-NapW2fM0i9bRaIevsIC43oaN3qKqabVsuLVHJgnSojXw