Battle of wits #3 Trixie
I think Pinkie has a crush on me, and it's making me uncomfortable. The other day I saw her blush at the sight of me, and she seems to be staring at me more and more. This morning I managed to get away from her, and as I was walking the streets of Ponyville I noticed something was off.
Everypony in town were huddled together in the center of town, I saw a stage in the middle and went to investigate. I stopped by Applejack and asked,
Me: "What's going on, is there some sort of circus happening now?"
Applejack: "I'm afraid not sugarcube, it's that there scallywag Trixie."
Trixie, I've heard that name before. She was that bitch from the show, I never really liked her.
Trixie: "Come one, come all, to see the great and powerful Trixie perform her superb tricks. Be prepared to be dazzled by my advance magic skills. I will be signing autographs after the show, for five bits per person."
Her eyes turned to me and she said.
Trixie: "You there, the freak ape, come up here and be amazed by the great and powerful Trixie."
Now I'm normally a calm guy, but I never wanted to murder someone so much in my life. I decided to play along and I went up to the stage, I felt the eyes of everypony staring at me.
Trixie: "Now I will show you a deck of cards, I want you to pick a card and put it back in the deck, I will then try to pick your card. Did you understand all that."
Me: "Oh of course, I'm not as big of an idiot as you."
Everypony laughed.
Trixie: "Trixie will let that slide for now, try not to do it again."
Me: "Of course Curtis will never think of doing that to the all powerful Trixie."
Everypony laughed again. Trixie blushed in anger at my comment.
Trixie: "Just pick your card."
I picked a card, it was the queen of diamonds. I put it back into the deck. Trixie then shuffled it and pulled out a card. It was the ace of spades.
Trixie: "Is this your card."
Me: "No. It was the queen of diamonds, that is the ace of spades. Can I go now your boring me."
Trixie was surprised at me for pointing out that she screwed up a trick in front of an audience. She quickly threw away the cards and got a large box, and some assorted swords. I knew this trick inside and out and I couldn't wait to screw it up for her. She opened the door and motioned for me to go inside. I did and the door was closed.
Trixie: "Now mares and gentlecolts, I the great and powerful Trixie will stab this box with these swords. But don't worry, the ape will be okay."
Now for those of you who don't know, there is a hidden door in the back of the box, though the trick didn't call for me to use it I did anyway. I peeked my head out from behind the box and motioned to the audience to stay quiet. Trixie of course didn't notice me. I saw a couple ponies fight back giggles as they got the idea I was about to do something funny.
Once Trixie was done stabbing the box with all the swords, she removed them. She let out a gasp of surprise when she found out I wasn't there. As she poked her head inside I snuck up behind her and pushed her inside. I slammed the door and pushed it on its side to prevent escape from the back. I then sat down on top of the box, completely sealing her inside.
The crowd roared with laughter. Trixie slammed a hoof on the door.
Trixie: "Let me out of here you dodo."
Me: "Looks like this here freak ape has just outsmarted and outwitted you at the same time."
Trixie screamed in rage and violently started pounding on the frame of the box. I replied with a few knocks of my own. The crowd of ponies hit the floor laughing at my display. Trixie let out another scream of rage.
Trixie: "LET ME OUT OF HERE YOU DARN DIRTY APE!"
Me: "You have to kiss my ass first."
The crowd nearly wet themselves, as Trixie screamed like a little filly. I had my fun so I just got up and went away, leaving Trixie to deal with the crowd of laughing ponies. Applejack slapped me on the back and laughed.
Applejack: "Oh my.....I ain't never seen nopony do that before. That there really tickled mah sides."
She tipped her hat to me as I bowed down. I was glad that I was able to have some fun today, even if it was at another ponies expense. Now I think I will deal with Pinkie.
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I laughed so hard at Trixie's expense !
'Can this be even better?' - I thought 10 minutes before.
Then I read this chapter.
Man, this was one of the best scnenes I've ever read/imagined.
I demand, wait for it.... MOOOAAARRRR!!!!
509567 Well this happened three years ago, when I was still in high school. I might have not been the most populer or coolest student there, but that was all about to change with this one prank. I managed to hack into the school's mainframe computer, I fiddled with a couple settings and inserted some of my own homemade exe and txt files and boom, I had every computer in the school playing hamster dance at full blast at the same time. If I recall the princible shit his pants when his computer started to play the song full blast in his office. Let's just say for the remainder of the Year I wasn't aloud near any of the school computers. The princible quit his job shortly afterwords.
509567 Well this happened three years ago, when I was still in high school. I might have not been the most populer or coolest student there, but that was all about to change with this one prank. I managed to hack into the school's mainframe computer, I fiddled with a couple settings and inserted some of my own homemade exe and txt files and boom, I had every computer in the school playing hamster dance at full blast at the same time. If I recall the princible shit his pants when his computer started to play the song full blast in his office. Let's just say for the remainder of the Year I wasn't aloud near any of the school computers. The princible quit his job shortly afterwords.498068 Sorry I just had to see that picture again. It makes me smile.
509642
Epic!
My best was on Halloween a few years back. I dressed up as the grim reaper. I stuffed some rags in the sleeves, shoes and top of the robe to make me look like a stuffed dummy and sat out in a lawn chair with a bowl of candy on my friend's front yard. Kids came by and some poked me to see if I were real or not. A group of older kids came by and were actually impressed at how "life-like" I was.I think one commented something like "That's a really well made dummy." "Thanks." When I said that, the whole group dropped their candy bags and ran like hell. The candy harvest was plentiful that year.
509817 :D HA HA HA HA.
lol curtis is the ultimate troll. even better that he outsmarted trixie.
"I decided to play along and I went up to the stage, I felt the eyes of everypony staring at me." -The crowd is thinking: "This is going to be good. What's he going to do this time?"