• Member Since 5th Oct, 2014
  • offline last seen March 24th

Cryptic-Dash


Student, Artist and Author

T
Source

After Discords defeat and in the midst of rebuilding equestria after the chaos before, ponies began not just building but also searching for memories and items from before discords reign, however what was uncovered was not to be expected as it was found to predate all equine life and known history. The statue that would sit in the royal gardens for years to come as the rise and fall of nightmare moon happened, and would occasionally be used as a special occasion item in rare times, when it was used for the summer sun celebration in ponyville one year after Nightmare moon was defeated and Princess Luna was freed and was to take part in her first celebration for a thousand years, the statue would sit behind the royal sisters and would accent the sun and moon crossing, however what followed was only to leave everypony in awe.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 8 )

You need to check your story for grammar errors and watch how you build a scentence
Or get an editor and/or proofreader

I really like the small setup to get you settled into the story, it gives a calm entrance at first where the readers can find out what's going on without the "ACTION! ADVENTURE! STUFF'S GOING ON!" kind of thing that a lot of other writers tend to do. It's urgent that you remember to limit the size of your sentences and check your grammar; if the reader can't read the sentence, the reader can't know what is going on. Try to imagine someone saying the sentence so that you can see if they don't make sense. Run-on sentences are always detrimental to any story, so keep in mind how to shorten your sentences and correct your grammar often. Anyway, I thought your description of this angel(?) was somewhat rocky, but skilled nonetheless; I love your detail on the wings!
Keep up the good work!

Update soon or feel the wrath of pie...:pinkiecrazy:

5131205 I'm glad you like it, or what there is of it, and i know that my grammar isn't what I would call great but it has been a long time since i've done any kind of writing like this and thought I'd try my hand at it.
Also it was one of those ideas that just popped into my head and ended up becoming a little story in my head, so I thought I'd let everyone see what I was thinking but I'm more arty than punctual if that helps.
But thanks for the feedback :ajsmug:

If you are cancelling this story then the status should be cancelled not complete. This is not a complete story and tagging as such is dishonesty to anyone new who finds this story. They will see the complete status and read this only to be stuck with a never finished story. Oh, and non chapter updates like this violate the FiMFiction's rules.

At least the stories premise won't be completely dead......right?!?!?!?!?!?!?!:duck:

5202667 find out soon, very soon :derpyderp2:

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