• Member Since 25th Feb, 2014
  • offline last seen 50 minutes ago

kudzuhaiku


She's looking at you. Yes you. And she is judging you with her eyes. There is no escape.

Comments ( 172 )
Comment posted by StardustSurvivor deleted Oct 12th, 2014

5122929

Good news. Nopony dies in the story.

Bad news. Since you didn't read the story but commented on what you thought was the theme, I am forced to post this emoticon. :derpytongue2:

Comment posted by StardustSurvivor deleted Oct 12th, 2014

5122939

Oh, I won't judge you, but other people who comment might see what you wrote after reading the story and say "hey, what's up with this guy?"

:derpytongue2:

Comment posted by StardustSurvivor deleted Oct 12th, 2014

I lower my head and breath deeply,

breathe

Yes even this story deserves corrections.

I'm not sure whether I actually liked it or not, so I will give it a thumb but not a fave.

Also I strongly suspect this will get featured whether you want it to or not.

what the actual fuck did i just read?

*sets head in hands* I-I don't know what to say. I haven't read it yet just the description. I've got to gain the courage to read this. I gotta prep.

Where are my skittles, M&Ms and a rockstar...... or five.

This made too much sense. I find it somewhat funny, but overall it seems rather tragic, :shrug: tragic jokes are good jokes.

i have no words for what i just read....... i'll just give you your thumbs up and leave...

Well, I can't lie and say that wow I haven't read something so eloquently worded since I was in school. Maybe I'm just weird, but I always had a sort of fondness for comedies of this sort. Not that I've invested time in being an expert in them.

I liked (green thumbs up'd) your story because I enjoyed it. Its eloquent wording at least gave me the impression of character depth, and it kept me going till the end. And the ending was very final. Which I consider a plus because many good fanfictions on this site, epics in their own right, tend to have a hard time ending, leaving people feel incomplete rather than satisfied but imaginative.

Anyways kudos to you for this story. For everything it has or is, I personally find it intriguing.

5122929 In addition to not reading the story, that's a bit of an uneducated point.
The whole concept of 'suicide by cop' is not to provoke unreasonable use of force leading to death, but to provoke reasonable use of force leading to death.

For example - yelling 'I'm going to kill you' followed by drawing and pointing a realistic gun at an armed cop.

That is not murder - that is suicide.

I was trapped know.

That one mistake ruined the whole thing for me. :fluttercry:

No, not really. I actually rather enjoyed it, though I'd be hard-pressed to come up with a good reason why. I guess I just enjoyed the premise, whimsical though it was. It's a good reminder that not everything has to be Dark. It was a piece of well-written silliness.

Pretty good story. A stallion tempted Fate by wanting his love to kill him from a single lick, but instead is held prisoner.

Fate is a cruel mistress indeed. :trollestia:

i read it, i like the world building you did, wasnt so much for the protagonist tho. the reason i liked the story was the same reason you cant look away from an oncoming train when you are trapped over the tracks. you know its not gonna end well, but you still cant look away. that, and it was a crazy premise, im a sucker for those. all in all, i liked it

I'm like, Suicide by Goddess.
I click and then I'm like, sex and comedy...Oh no, oh no, I am definitely reading this later.

5123019 I am shocked, Shocked to see nobodies done Orgasmo in Equestria.

He picked a hell of a way to go.

TDR

Interesting and not what I expected.

5123041 ~/o what makes a pony? Is it the power in his hooves? Or is it his quest for glory? ~/o :rainbowlaugh:

If no sane person should be enjoying this story, then I revel in my insanity. It was a beautiful dark portrait of a deeply disturbed obsessive who in the end failed at his own convictions.

5123132

Was it actually dark though? :unsuresweetie:

Called it. Totally called it. It's in the feature box.

5123150

It shouldn't be the though. This was just something I tossed off with no real thought after waking up with it in my head. :rainbowhuh:

Kudz, did you get into the bath salts again?

5122977 well maybe that's just my lack of sleep and horribly skeptical parents talking then.

5123164 Welcome to the world of men, Kudz. You should know the unexpected can bring pleasant results.

I was really hoping he was going to blow a raspberry on her genitalia.

5123231

The Goddess poops... but does she orgasm?

:trollestia: - Keep going. A bit more to the left. No, your other left. There you go.

Trottingham, a city across the sea, is a wretched sump hole.

So, what you're saying is that there's a hole in the world like a great black pit and it's full of ponies who are full of shit and the vermin of the world inhabit it and it goes by the name of Trottingham?

In any case, having read this... I feel kind of embarrassed. Not because of anything in the text, but because of how personal it feels. I feel like I just read your innermost thoughts. The invitation doesn't assuage the sense of violation in the least. You have my apologies as well as my thanks.

Also, Celestia truly is a cruel and terrible being. :trollestia:

I'll say this much: May all the powers of creation have pity upon the one whose fate is decided by the justice and blinding, unblinking brilliance of the mercy of one such as Celestia.

This was really nice. I have to say, I could imagine a relation from this to the ancient Roman texts with such syles. Although the comedies I have read are usually more positive in outcome, I can definitely see the appeal to yours.

This is fucking hot :pinkiecrazy:

i feel like i should be drinking tea while sitting in front of a fire while reading this

5123242

Also, Celestia truly is a cruel and terrible being.

Isn't she wonderful? th03.deviantart.net/fs70/200H/f/2012/230/2/a/trollestia_by_scarecrow113-d5bjmv3.jpg

5123355

She was awake the whole time, just waiting to see what was going to happen. She could have had him captured when he entered the castle, but no. She could have had him captured when he entered her room, but no. She could have teleported him to the dungeon while he was leering over her, but no.

I mean, she was above the blankets, sprawled out invitingly, teats up, and with full knowledge of what was coming because of her sister.

It is basically entrapment.

**lick**

:trollestia: - Ah, there there we go. Now I get to punish you.

5123364 Had me roaring with laughter!

I was expecting Celly to throw him into the sun. I was a bit surprised, but ultimately not disappointed.
Kudos to you.:trollestia:

As per your request, I am leaving a reason for liking your story.

Honesty

As dark and morbid the truth may be, Sebastion lived a life of honesty. Never shelling himself within a false facade of ideals and desires brought about by the influence of others. Very few seek to live such an honest life, as the difficulties lying in there paths are far to intimidating.

Finally, you truly summed up the comedy of tragedies in what could be considered borderline Shakespearean quality. I commend your effort, and wish more people could enjoy such irony.

Well... that just happened. Celestia is nothing if not just... I guess.

The only reason I can see you getting dislikes for, is the gay content.
I myself have no issue with that...sooo...upvote.:twilightsmile:

Ironically while he see's it as a torment now, it's likely Celestia just saw it as a reprieve for someone who was so desperately focused on her to the point of desiring death.

It wouldn't even be a punishment for many others, but he views it as such and she knows he likely couldn't refuse his order, thus keeping him from killing himself or forcing herself to kill him, as well as the fact that he'd be kept safe in the palace with all he could really have or want.

... get out of my head, damn it.

5123472
There'd be flak if the gay content was the driving force of the story and the protagonist made it a crusade to eliminate homosexuality.

5123544
5123472

Is it really gay though? :unsuresweetie:

I felt it was more bi-sexual.

So Celestia would have been fine with him just sniffing her butt? Good to know.

Also, I have to wonder how much counseling Luna needed after wading through his dreams about her sister.

5123620
Didn't really bother me much, not even the mentioning of him whoring himself out for a while. A pony's gotta do what a pony's gotta do.

I was just saying if that was the key... plot point, there would've been flak, but it wasn't.

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