Stranger still
The moon shone bright in the night sky above Twilight Sparkle as she waited near the doors to her castle, deep in thought. She wore a blank expression, and the only sign that she wasn’t a life-like statue was the slight shivering every now and then. It was chilly, but not enough to force her into a heavier sweater than the one she was already wearing. She could barely feel the thin black material against her coat, but she was reminded of its existence every time the soft breeze pushed it gently from side to side.
Twilight still couldn’t believe that the dress that Rarity had given her had only cost half what she expected, especially when she had allotted for her friend’s generosity. She supposed that she would have to make it up to her in some way later, perhaps in paid VIP trips to Canterlot and other cities. She would have to ask Spike later—He would certainly have a few ideas.
Rarity had given her a long description when presenting the dress to her, calling it “french lilac”, maxi length, a-line cut, with hoofkerchief hem ruffles. The dress also included an illusion neckline and set-in shoulder straps. Many other words went right over Twilight’s head, which embarrassed her as an avid logophile. To her, it was just a purple-grey color, and had ruffles that started at the flanks and ended about mid-leg. She still thought it was very pretty though.
It was odd, really. Most other mares, she assumed, would have at least one dress that was suitable for going on a date. But thanks to her asocial lifestyle before moving to Ponyville, she’d never had the mind—or time—to purchase any. The only dresses she owned was the one Rarity had given her for her birthday last year, last year’s Grand Galloping Gala dress, and her Coronation dress. All were either too casual or far too formal. Which was why her first stop had been Rarity’s. Because of one simple fact:
She’d never been on a date before.
She’d never been asked on a date before.
It didn’t matter that this night wouldn’t be based on feelings towards her date. To her, this was something brand new. Something she could easily mess up. Thoughts of this night has to be perfect floated around her mind.
Not that she wanted it to go well, of course. Or, not too well, at least. The point was to make him suffer, not to give him the utter delusion that she could like him. Or even worse, love him. He was planning to take her on a bad date, she knew. Naturally, to combat this, she would just have to be an even worse date than him. She wouldn’t flinch at whatever he threw at her, figuratively or literally.
She chuckled, remembering how he’d come to ask her out. He probably had expected her to decline his offer, and was going to spring his trap then. But, knowing him, he’d probably also planned for the chance that she might accept. The only thing she had against him was that she was expecting the trick, and not a nice dinner. She didn’t worry about what that could be; it didn’t matter. All that mattered was her part in the game, her strategy. Whatever happened, she would be the last one laughing.
A sudden chill passed through her, as if, just maybe, she thought that what she was doing could be wrong. She quickly shook it off. It was just her nerves getting the best of her. Odd, inexplicable nerves. She would have pinned this on being her first date, as she had only a few moments before, but this felt different.
Discord was the master of chaos. He was quick to adapt, and if he caught on to even the slightest hint that she knew of his plans, the game would change, and she’d lose. Again.
“Maybe this won’t be as easy as I thought,” she murmured to herself with a shudder. But there was no going back now. When he’d asked her to dinner, it was an invitation to play the game. And she’d accepted.
Now she just had to play it.
Spike watched from his bedroom window as his adopted sister stared upwards into the sky. He’d been watching for a few minutes now, and he’d noticed that she hadn’t blinked once. Anypony else watching her from his view probably wouldn’t have noticed, but with his draconic eyesight he could see her face quite clearly. A worried knot formed in his gut, and he couldn’t help but feel like something was horribly wrong.
What was even worse was that it didn’t feel like Discord was the problem. Spike didn’t know what it was—he couldn’t pin the feeling.
Maybe it was worry for his big sister’s first date, he thought. After all, why wouldn’t he be at least a tiny bit worried for her? She’d seemed excited enough when she got home from Rarity’s. She didn’t really say much, though, which usually meant that she was nervous. Which was perfectly normal, but he could tell that there was something more.
He’d decided to leave it alone at the time, as he feared he would add on more stress, but now he was wondering if that had been a good idea. Something was wrong. It was already odd enough that she’d chosen to wait outside instead of comfortably in the castle, but the not blinking was starting to freak him out. Maybe he was just seeing things. Maybe she’d just blinked at the same time he did. For the past thirteen minutes…
“Okay, maybe I should go check on her,” he said aloud as he got up from his watch at the window. But just then, a black carriage with no ponies pulling it rolled up to where Twilight was standing.
It was Discord.
“A horseless carriage? It’s unusual, but I wouldn’t say chaotic.” Twilight’s face beget no surprise as the thing rolled up. A raised eyebrow and a haughty smirk did appear though, followed by an unimpressed laugh.
“Does everything I do have to be chaotic? That would mean consistency!” Discord threw open the door to the carriage. Literally—it went flying off into the night, never to be seen again. He stepped down onto the cool stone path. “And if I had consistency, I wouldn’t be a true being of chaos, now would I?”
“So, a paradox then,” Twilight concluded. “Nevermind, that does sound like you. But traveling by carriage still seems a bit normal by your standard, horseless or not.”
“Alright, then.” He rolled his eyes but kept smiling all the same. Without skipping a beat, he snapped his talons and the carriage melted into a puddle of water. “By what means would you wish to travel tonight, my dear princess?” He bowed before Twilight, as low and politely possible.
“Hmm, I’ll have to think about that.” This was it. The game was starting. She’d have to choose wisely, choose the unexpected. He would plan on her choosing something practical. So that would mean she would have to choose the most outlandish thing she could think of.
“Well, we haven’t got all night,” Discord reminded her.
“I’ve decided,” Twilight announced, a wide grin upon her face. This would do it. This would start off the game in her favor. “I would like to ride in a flying purple watermelon. Oh, and it has to have wings. Purple wings.” Somehow, she managed to say this with an incredibly straight face. Rarity’s training was starting to pay off.
“Really? Are you sure? I could conjure a grand carriage, and hire some pegasi to—”
“What, is a flying watermelon too hard for you?” It took all she had not to burst out laughing. Yes, this was definitely the right path. “I should think that the Lord of Chaos could manage a measly watermelon.”
“Of course I can!” Discord tried his best not to sound flustered. Then, in a calmer voice, he said, “If that’s what you want, then it shall be.”
He picked a pebble off the road and tossed it a few feet. Almost immediately it began to balloon out from itself, growing bigger and bigger by the second. It changed from grey to a dark purple color, and great feathery wings began to sprout from it. Discord decided that the two ends of the pebble-turned giant fruit would serve as the front and back of the vehicle, and began to carve out windows accordingly with his mind. The inside was already hollowed out, and a door began to form on the side facing them.
When the magical hodge-podge stopped moving, Discord walked up to it, opened the door, and bowed toward Twilight.
“Your melon, my lady.”
Twilight couldn’t help but giggle as he motioned for her to get in.
“Now that’s more like it!” she declared. She was a tiny bit impressed, but only because he’d responded so quickly. He was definitely a difficult opponent.
She sat down on one of the leathery plum colored seats and noticed that a platter of chocolate-covered strawberries were laid next to her. Her mouth watered slightly. She’d never finished her lunch at The Hayburger earlier.
And she loved chocolate-covered strawberries.
“Chocolate-covered strawberries? How unoriginal can you get!” She waved her hoof dismissively as she scoffed at him. They were going out to eat, anyway. Her stomach could wait.
“Ah, but they aren’t just your everyday strawberries,” Discord countered. He climbed into the giant melon and shut the door behind him, sitting on a seat opposite from Twilight. He picked up one of the strawberries in his paw. “Every single one tastes like a different fruit! Well, all except one.” He popped the fruit into his mouth. “Mmm, orange!” He held out the platter to Twilight in earnest. “One of these deceitful little strawberries tastes like a hot chilli pepper! It’s a game: we each take turns picking one out until the chilli pepper is found. The one to find it loses.”
“So like Griffonian Roulette?”
“Yes, yes, I suppose,” he grumbled.
“Well, I guess it’s my turn, right? Since you already ate one?” This was likely the first of a few traps lined up for her. She would have to tread lightly from now on.
Discord nodded, and waited eagerly for her choice.
Twilight levitated the one farthest from her toward her mouth. She hesitated a moment, her stomach churning. This could easily, more than likely, blow up in her face. But refusing to eat it would be like forfeiting, and then she’d never have a chance like this again.
She squeezed her eyes shut and braced herself and took a tentative bite.
“Green apple?” Her eyes shot open in surprise.
“Oh, you should have seen your face! Maybe this game is a little too nerve-wracking for you. We still have some time before our reservation, but maybe we could stop and—”
“No!” Twilight shouted. She almost slapped herself. She’d been too frantic, she may have made him suspicious. “Um, I mean, it’s okay. I’d like to keep playing.”
Discord raised an eyebrow. “Alright, as you wish.” He plucked a strawberry off the platter and tossed it into his maw. “Cherry,” he announced.
Twilight already had another strawberry in her magic. Without breaking eye contact with Discord, she took a bite.
“Grape.”
“Getting a bit competitive now, are we?” he mused. He chomped down another strawberry. “Pineapple!”
“Raspberry.”
“Kiwi.”
“Banana.”
“Mango.”
“Is coconut even a fruit?”
“Blueberry.”
“Pomegranate.”
Twilight took small bites while Discord ate them whole. They continued until there were only two chocolate-covered strawberries left. Twilight eyed the last two warily.
“We’ll eat them at the same time so it’s fair.” He gestured toward the platter. “Ladies first.”
Left or right? Right or left? Twilight couldn’t decide. Did it really matter? Discord could easily make whichever one she picked the chilli pepper without her knowing. He was adamant about not cheating, but he wasn’t shy about finding loopholes and twisting the rules to his purposes. In fact, he hadn’t even stated any rules, and there were no rules about magically switching the losing piece in Griffonian Roulette! Integrity kept ponies from cheating, but she wasn’t sure if Discord had any!
“Oh come now, it isn’t that hard. Would you like me to pick one for you?”
“No, I’ve got it,” she answered quickly. There was no way she was going to let him do that. She took a deep breath and grabbed the one on the right.
“Alright, then.” He took the remaining strawberry. “Ready?”
“As I’ll ever be.”
“On the count of three.” As he said this, a large number 0 appeared into the air. “One.” The 0 changed into a 1. “Two. Three!”
Twilight popped the strawberry into her mouth and chewed, expecting her taste-buds to be assaulted with fiery, red hot pepper at any moment. Her face would turn red and her eyes would water profusely, and she’d no doubt scream as best she could for a glass of water.
“Oh by all things disorderly, that’s HOT!”
But it wasn’t her who screamed, it was Discord.
He clutched at his burning throat, trying to make the intense sensation stop. Waterfalls of tears poured out of his eyes, though there was no water build up in the melon, and nothing seemed to get wet. His face reddened, and flames began to burst out of his ears.
It started as a snort. Then a giggle. And then Twilight found that she was laughing. It came as a surprise to her, at first. The scene was silly, sure, but she felt… happy. Like she was having fun. She felt herself start to unwind, which was unsettling. She couldn’t be having fun, not with him. She was just happy that she managed to survive this round, that’s why she was laughing.
“Don’t just sit there and laugh!” Discord’s pained voice stopped Twilight’s train of thought, but a coy smile still remained on her face. “Hand me that glass of water!” He pointed behind her with his talons, paw still glued to his neck.
Twilight was about to object—there hadn’t been a glass of water there before—but quickly stopped herself. She turned her head, and sure enough there was a glass of water sitting where the empty platter had been.
It was quickly levitated into Discord’s outstretched claws, and in a blink it was emptied down his throat.
The change was immediate. The red color faded, and the water and flame ceased to pour from his orifices. Discord coughed politely into his fist a few times, and smiled a sheepish smile at Twilight.
Twilight finally had time to register the flavor of her last strawberry. “It tastes like… a strawberry?” The sudden normalcy caught her by surprise and brought a smile to her face. Only Discord could make regularity seem unexpected.
“I guess you won, hmm, Princess?” The glass morphed into a napkin, and he used it to dab the sweat off his face. “Oh, would you look at the time; we should start heading to our destination.”
Twilight laughed. She had won, hadn’t she? Wait. Destination?
“Where exactly are we going, Discord?” The smile still hadn’t left her face.
“Oh, but that would spoil the surprise!” Discord said in mock indignation. The watermelon, in all its purple glory, began to rise up into the air. “Say, you look cheerful. What’s got you smiling like that?”
And she did look cheerful. Twilight was looking out the window and humming to herself idly with a smile on her face. Without a moment’s hesitation, she said, “Spending time with you.”
She froze.
Oh no.
Oh Celestia no.
She did not just say that.
“Really?”
Oh yes she did.
“Um, what I meant to say was-”
“I like spending time with you too, Twilight Sparkle.”
The warmth from his smile caused Twilight to blush madly, and she turned her gaze back to the window.
Not another word was said the rest of the way to their mysterious destination, riding in the purple watermelon that flapped lazily through the sky. Just one alicorn with her nerves coiled around themselves, and one draconequus who was trying his best to alleviate the guilt he’d brought upon himself.
Quill flew across paper making a SCRITCH SCRATCH in Spike’s otherwise quiet room. He wrote with a certain conviction, driven by brotherly instinct, that rivaled the highests scribes of Canterlot. He stared at the parchment with a grim expression, but had high hopes that his fear would be alleviated within the coming morning.
Dear Princess Celestia,
Spike here!
I’ve got some questions about Discord, and you’re the only one I could think of that might be able to help. Well, you and Luna, but I’ve tried sending her a letter once, and we both know how that ended. Who knew your sister wasn’t used to letters sent by dragonfire? Too bad she tried to mobilize the Equestrian Army against the “incoming dragon attack”, though.
Well, back to Discord. How well do you know him? Was he more of a Sombra-type guy to you, or a Nightmare Moon? I’m wondering because he asked Twilight out on a date tonight, and let’s face it - none of us really know him that well. I did think of Fluttershy, but she’d be too shy about this kind of thing I think.
Do you think he’d ask Twilight out just to break her heart? I mean, usually I’d give him the opposite of the benefit of the doubt (give him the doubt?), and say “Yeah, he’d do that”. But after seeing him around Ponyville a lot I’m not so sure. He doesn’t seem like a mean guy, to be honest. Maybe super annoying, but not mean.
But I’m still worried. So any advice you could give would be great.
And if he does end up breaking our Twilight’s heart, I think there are enough alicorns around to put him in his place. (Plus one very angry dragon!)
Write back soon,
Spike the dragon
P.S. I’m kind of worried about Twilight. She was acting weird before she left tonight, and I don’t know why. I’ll keep you posted.
Thanks to my editors, and my new pre-readers (Fallen Astral, LoneUnicornWriter, Untried, and Protopony350) this chapter has come out much more quickly than the last!
Go and thank them! ...please?
As always, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! 
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"WE MUST RALLY OUR FINEST WARRIORS AGAINST THE DRAGON SCOURGE!"
LOL... May I have a little glass of water... also REALLY TWILIGHT REALLY A FREAKIN WATERMELON even Discord was confused.
I think they missed one?
be a true being (a )chaos [of] ?
I honestly want Discord and Twilight to end up with one another, the setup is just too adorable.
5259614
sorry, can you rephrase that?
CUTENESS OVERLOAD. *-*
Hmmm... Would this count as cradle-robbing?
5259655
i.imgur.com/N7i6Z.gif
'Course not...
found typo. just after first page break
this line I wouldn’t be a true being (a) chaos, now would I?” [of] ?
5259683
I'm wondering about your brackets and parentheses but I'll go give it a look
5259683
fixed it
Hope there is more soon love this
Not sure whether to laugh or d'awwww...
I'm really enjoying this story, do you have an eta on the next chapter?
this need to update faster.
5259721
Next few days? I'm actually a pretty busy person
but I've always been a multitasker, so hopefully soon!
5259735 In regards to a new image for the story I'm sure you could find something on deviant art, I know I posted a few links in one of the comments, or you could ask someone with artistic skills to draw it up for you. Although I think you might want make sure the artist is okay with MLP beforehand.
5259696
I put the parentheses around the word I think is a typo, the brackets around what I think you or other authors might have meant
This reminds me of another story somewhere on this site where Rainbow Dash asks Twilight on a date on April Fools Day. She thought that, if Twilight rejected her, she could pass it off as a prank and not ruin their friendship. Twilight, however had the smart (incredibly stupid) idea to try and out-prank her by accepting and inevitably breaking Rainbow's heart. Later she realizes her mistake and apologizes before setting up another date.
EDIT: Found it.
MOAR!
Bet the next chapter will be four thousand words long.
5259716 Both, definitely both.
For SOME reason I especially enjoyed this part
But yeah, making it strawberry flavored was pretty great!
5259655
I say SHE'S robbing the grave!
D'awww... I like the part where Twilight said she want to spend some quality (or chaotic) time with him.
5259988
5259840 I read that story, it was wonderful.
Time for a reread.
Yay! Flying purple watermelon! Made me laugh soooo hard!
i.imgur.com/tHw0b.gif
lol the strawberry competition with a spicy suprise lol
i wonder which chilli type did Discord get hmm.
also a flying watermelon carriage nice and once the date is done they can eat it lol
i hope Discord is sincere about the date and he wont break Twilight's heart and i hope Twilight forgets her plan to break Discords heart since i think Fluttershy would be angry about that.
5260407 thinking I know discord, it probably wasn't on the order of a ghost chilli pepper, that's just cruel.
Twi should have asked for a flying spaghetti monster, just for the hell of it.
Still, fun chapter, though it made me wonder when will things finally go wrong. Discord kind of has it coming due to his past, but he probably has accounted for the possibility of Twi being needlessly paranoid about him.
Twilight, don't break Discord's heart. DISCORD DON'T YOU DARE BREAK TWILIGHT'S HEART OR I WILL DESTROY YOU!!! Spike, give Luna a second chance. Luna, not everything is an attack.
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR Please?!?!?!
5259840 I noticed that as well. As a matter of fact, I just read that story yesterday.
Funny coincidence, that.
I'm okay with the way this is going.
5260013
I find myself increasingly enjoying this. Your pre-readers' work clearly shows but that's not the only thing.
You've found your pacing I think, it's still fast but not rushed like in the beginning. And a story about Twilight and Discord dating probably needs to be fast paced for a whole lot of reasons :)
The watermelon, the strawberry game, Twilight's anxiety... great mix.
Keep going!
5260698
yikes yeah ghost pepper is a beast lol tho i havent tried one and nor i wont either since i saw on Man VS Food that its not a chili you want to mess with and even if you got high fat milk (or other dairy products) it will hurt.
wasnt there an even hotter chili some where?
I just have to say when
was said a chili pepper is a fruit.
5260940 What he said. You're really hitting your stride with this story.
5261308 I think he was referring to the one that tasted normal.
Antisocial: intentionally acting in such a way as to cause problems for others in social situations; i.e. a jerk who intentionally is obnoxious to make others uncomfortable. Lightening Dust was antisocial towards the other cadets.
Asocial: Avoiding social interaction. A recluse who spends more time reading than even trying to talk to others is asocial. Fluttershy and Twilight are asocial (though having the others around is helping them get over it.)
Sorry, this is a personal irritant when people mistake these two terms.
5259615 As with this latest chapter
I just loved it when Twilight realized she was enjoying her time with Discord
I really like the escalating prank war/date competition between Twilight and Discord, it's funny while simultaneously a great emotional foil. I was hoping Spike was writing to Twilight's other brother though.
5260108
Well... have fun with that.
5261974
I didn't know that there was another word for that.
Thank you for the enlightenment, I'll have to go change that.
5259655
Well there is a point in Homestuck where an immortal character says something to the effect of: When you're immortal you either become ok with the idea of pedophilia, adjust how you compare ages, or never love.
5264621
...did I hear
HOMESTUCK?
Another card goes on the house. Will it be a careless placement, or a bump from the outside that sends them to the ground?