Dyslexicon
Soarin rustled in his sleep. At some point during the night, he and Dash had broken off their embrace and they were now lying on their stomachs. Dash was cuddled up against him, sleeping soundly underneath Soarin’s right wing, her forelegs stretched forward.
About an hour later, Dash’s eyes slowly cracked open. She was cold. She rolled over to see that Soarin had turned over onto his back, no longer cradling her in his wing. She sat up and looked at the clock on Soarin’s nightstand; 9:00am. Dash plunked back down on the cloudbed, half-hoping she would wake Soarin up. However, despite stirring, Soarin remained asleep.
Tired of waiting, Dash climbed atop the sleeping pony and began to kiss his neck. She rubbed her hooves against his chest, then his shoulders, and then the area where his wings met his back. Dash knew from experience that this area would likely be sore for any frequent flyer, and was thus the “sweet spot” when it came to a massage.
Soarin quietly moaned as he drifted back into consciousness. When he finally opened his eyes, they immediately met Dash’s. She was still on top of him, staring at him seductively.
“Y’know...” Dash began, “I guess it wouldn’t be so bad to go for it. I mean... you’re telling me I have nothing to worry about, and you’ve given me no reason to distrust you so far... well, no reason to distrust you more than any other colt.”
Soarin grinned, placed his hooves on Dash’s thighs, and began to move her into position. He had gone from zero to one-hundred in the mere moments he’d been awake, and his body was ready for the task at hand.
With physical intimacy only inches away, Dash whispered into Soarin’s ear:
“It’s nine now; make sure we’re finished by ten, okay?” She smiled at him.
Soarin smiled back and prepared for ignition, when all of a sudden his jaw slipped open and his grip on Dash’s hips loosened.
“It’s nine? Nine... o’clock? Shit.. shit, SHIT!”
Soarin gently rolled Dash off of his belly and looked at her apologetically.
“Dash I’m so sorry, I... I have a commitment on Sunday mornings and I totally slept in. I thought it was earlier.”
Dash couldn’t hide her disappointment. She turned away and crossed her forelegs before looking back at him, her eyes pleading.
“Is this a joke?”
“Dash,”
“Seriously. I take care of you, I’m being driven crazy all night, and the MOMENT I decide to rut you, you ‘can’t do it’. I mean, seriously, can’t whatever it is wait?”
Soarin looked down and thought for a moment before looking back up.
“Dash, it really really can’t. I’m sorry.”
Dash got off the bed and began to flutter out of his bedroom.
“Dash wait!”
She stopped and turned around, still maintaining her altitude.
Soarin got off the bed and trotted to where Dash was flying. He looked up at her and saw a look of disappointment, but not anger. He put his hooves on her hips and took a deep breath.
“Dash, I’m sorry, I really am. I really like you. Like, really. I never let girls sleep over; nine times out of ten, I send them home in a charriot the second I’m through with them.”
Dash landed in front of Soarin and looked up at him. Soarin sank to his knees and began again.
“I know... I know I’m not typically the biggest gentlecolt, but it’s the truth, and I’m saying it so that you’ll believe me when I tell you that I really like you. I want to see you again. I want to see you again the first moment I can.”
Dash lifted Soarin back to his feet and rubbed his shoulder with her hoof. She was about to turn and leave when she turn to Soarin again.
“What is it that you have to do that’s so important? Can I come with you?”
Soarin stared blankly. Rainbow Dash wasn’t sure if he’d heard her so she continued:
“Like... can I accompany you to whatever it you have to do? Or at least fly you there?”
Soarin exhaled and shook his head. Dash was getting frustrated with his lack of forthcoming.
“Soarin, this is really ruttin’ sketchy. Tell me what’s going on... or at least tell me when we can get together again.
Soarin’s frown quickly became a smile.
“I’ll take you out tonight, if you’re not busy. Any restaurant you want; I can get a table anywhere.”
“Eight o’clock?”
“Sounds perfect. Dashie, I’m so sorry about... about all this. I promise tonight at dinner I’ll explain everything. Here, you can hang out a little longer.”
Soarin walked back to his bedroom, listening to make sure Dash was following. He went to throw on a polo-shirt with his Cutie-Mark adorned on the breast when Dash stopped him.
“Soarin, whatever it is you have to do, it can’t be that important, because you STINK.”
She laughed as Soarin raised his hoof and smelled himself.
“It’s just going to rub off on a shirt and make you smell more; you may as well just go without one. You’re sexier like that anyway.”
Soarin smiled and turned to Dash.
“Fortunately, my business isn’t going to require attracting anypony.”
“Oh, I don’t think it’s unattractive,” Dash began, burying her face in Soarin’s chest and inhaling deeply. “It totally turns me on. It’s just... impolite. Y'know... to be unshowered in public. Especially someone with the notoriety you have.”
Soarin was confused.
“So... what should I do?”
“Shower!”
“It’s 9:04! I need to be there at 9:30!”
“Well, I’ll help you. It'll be faster.”
With that, Dash led Soarin by the hoof into his bathroom. It was massive; at least four times the size of her bathroom. She positioned Soarin under the water and turned it on, grabbing two bars of soap and handing one to Soarin. He jumped as the initially-cold water rolled through his mane, but a few moments later, it had warmed up to a comfortable temperature.
“Uh, Dash... I can handle this myself...”
“But it’ll go quicker if I help you. Plus I want to, and you still owe me, so deal with it.”
Soarin resigned to his fate, grabbed Rainbow Dash, pulled her in close and passionately kissed her. She pulled away and spun him around.
“Okay, we have to hurry. You get your front, I’ll get your back.”
Soarin began to scrub himself as per usual, and Dash began on his back. Sore from several shows the week prior, the warm water combined with Dash’s sensual rubbing made Soarin feel great. Like he could melt at any moment. He started breathing more heavily, with bits of panting escaping here and there. Dash moved down to his flank and began soaping it up. Soarin lead out an audible moan that made Dash giggle. On her knees, scrubbing his butt, Dash got a little curious.
“What are you thinking about?”
“You, oh..., you don’t... ah.. wanna know.”
Dash stood up and began to wash the back of Soarin’s neck, the point where his wings met his back, and his back itself. She leaned in and whispered in his ear:
“But I do. I really do.” She continued to scrub him.
“I... I’m thinking about what I want to do to you, right now. It’s kinda driving me crazy.” Soarin finished washing his belly and began to scrub his private parts.
“What do you want to do to me?”
Soarin, clean and ready to rinse off, turned around and pulled Dash against him, looking down at her as the water washed the soap off his back. He turned Dash around again so that she was facing away from him and grabbed her hooves with his own.
He pinned her hooves against the bathroom wall and leaned in closely, nibbling on the top of her ear. His belly hugged her back as he kissed her neck and whispered in her in ear. Dash giggled; she could feel herself getting excited.
“I just want to... to...”
Soarin positioned himself behind her.
“I want to rut you so hard. Harder than anyone ever has before. I want you to scream my name over and over and never think about another colt again. I want to...”
Soarin rubbed himself against Dash’s thigh and continued:
“I want to see you quivering in pleasure beneath me, at my mercy. Powerless... a slave to my c-”
A light went off in Soarin’s head and he released Dash’s hooves and opened the shower door.
“Damn it Dash! I’m gonna be late!” Both of them giggled. Soarin exited the shower and grabbed a towel and blowdryer, motioning for Dash to turn the water off. She complied.
When the two were dry, Soarin put on his shirt and led Dash across the hall back to her room.
“I’ll come meet you here at 8 okay? Any restaurant you want, just call and say it’s for the Wonderbolts account.”
Soarin kissed Dash one last time before walking to her window and hopping out. Dash watched him fall several stories with his back to the ground, looking back up at her. He waved goodbye to her an unfolded his wings, and took off flying backwards.
“Showoff!” Dash called to him before smiling and closing her window. She watched Soarin roll in the air and orient himself upright before he took off through the labyrinth of towers that dotted the Canterlot skyway. Dash waited about half a minute before opening her window and taking off after him.
She bolted to the last place she’d seen him before he disappeared from view and saw him almost a half-a-mile in the distance, zipping past young pegasi families out for a sunday fly. She followed him, making sure to keep her distance.
She tracked him all across Canterlot. They had begun in the castle itself, before crossing the market in midtown. Finally, she tracked him to Riverbend, the nicest neighborhood in all of Canterlot [well, technically on the outskirts of Canterlot, but whatever, same thing]. The houses were small compared to the towering steeples of the actual city, and while it made spotting Soarin easier, it also made avoiding detection more difficult for Dash. She saw Soarin land in front of a huge driveway, fold up his wings, and cantor towards a mansion. Dash landed in the yard and hid in a bush; far enough away to remain undetected, but close enough to see/hear what was going on.
She saw Soarin reach the door and take a deep breath. He knocked three times and waited. Dash sensed some kind of tension in him; he wasn’t relaxed, that was for certain.
Finally, the front door swung open and Dash saw a gorgeous mare standing before Soarin. Her heart sank. He had postponed rutting her to go see another mare? She debated confronting Soarin right then and there before catching herself.
We’re not... ‘dating’, he’s entitled to do what he wants... but... he said he really liked me, like... that he wanted to BE with me...
Dash’s emotions began to pound on her heart and it began to crack. Before it broke however, she turned her attention to Soarin who hadn’t moved from the spot. His head was lowered in the pegasi cultural symbol of shame. Dash listened closely as she saw his lips moving.
“...so please just let me see him. I get one Sunday every two weeks, and half the time I have a show scheduled and have to miss my day. When that happens, you make me wait another two weeks, rather than letting me have him the next week...”
The mare in the house scowled at Soarin.
“Well, maybe if you didn’t focus on working so much, you’d have more time with him.”
“My working is what pays your bills! For your house! I pay for him to go to the best school in Canterlot... how can you tell me I shouldn’t work so much? I barely make the money before you spend it!”
The mare leaned in close. She was a silver unicorn with black hair. She really was stunning, but all her beauty was washed away by the cruelty of her next sentence.
“Well maybe you should’ve thought about that before you squirted the little shit into me!”
Soarin was clearly taken aback by this. Rainbow Dash had finally realized what who this mystery unicorn was, and even her jaw hung open in disbelief. She saw Soarin take a deep breath and then begin again, retaining his firm tone.
“I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life... but he isn’t one of them.”
“Well, you certainly treated him like one. Always out of town with the Wonderbolts, cheating on me, getting drunk, doing drugs-”
Soarin cut her off.
“I have a right to see him. Don’t make this any harder on him.”
The silver unicorn smiled slyly, content she’d humiliated Soarin sufficiently. She turned around and called into the house, her voice echoing throughout its massive walls.
“Swift! Your father’s here! Come down!” She turned back to Soarin, who sighed with relief.
“When will you have him back?”
“Six-thirty? Latest seven? There’s a show he likes to watch with his friends on Sunday nights, remember?”
“Whatever. If I’m not home when you get home, just fly him in through the window.”
“What other choice do I have? I don’t have a key to my own house anymore, remember?”
“It’s not your house anymore.”
“Say what you want, but I still own it,” Soarin was begining to get ticked off. “You should be thankful I let y- oh hey bud!”
A small, shiny, light blue pegasus shambled into view.
“Dad!”
He jumped at Soarin and threw his hooves around his neck.
“Hey there champ, how you doing?”
“Good! Check this out!”
Swiftwing let go of his father and slid to the ground. He began to clumsily beat his wings back and forth, and he gently rose about a foot off the ground. Tired out from the furious flapping, he descended back to the ground mere seconds after taking flight. He looked up for his father’s approval; Soarin beamed back at him.
“That was great! Really great! You’ll be flying in no time.”
“Can we practice today?”
“No, sorry Swift, I just don’t have the energy, I’m sorry. Besides, it’s Sunday, lets just go get lunch and relax today. Anywhere you wanna eat is fine by me.”
Swiftwing paused for a minute and considered something before declaring:
“How about you eat here? Like... like we used to! Mom, you could cook, and we could all eat at the table together like we... like we used to?”
The silver unicorn turned and shut the door behind her, leaving her ex-husband and son on the doorstep together. Soarin put his hand on Swiftwing’s head and rustled his hair.
“Swift, I’m sorry, but your mother isn’t ready to do that.”
“Why not? Why is mom so mean to you? Why does she hate you so much?”
Soarin kneeled down to his young son’s level and held him close. Soarin felt that the mother of his child was mean to both of them, but he wasn't going to do anything to turn him against her. Those days were in the past; he had lost custody and had little other choice. Owning the house and the foal support/alimony was the only real leverage he had in the scenario; the courts always favor the mare. Especially when the stallion has a history like Soarin's.
“Don’t blame her. It’s my fault. I did some really really bad things before and after you were born, and your mother has every reason to not like me. It's... It's something you'll understand when you're a little older?”
Swiftwing was clearly disappointed. Soarin sensed he was on the verge of tears, so he quickly changed the subject.
“Buuut, I know something that I think will cheer you up. Something I think you are finally old enough to do.”
Swiftwing looked up at his father through watering eyes. Soarin’s heart broke at the sight of him, but he simply turned around and trotted down the steps.
“If you can lift yourself with your wings, they're strong enough to fly on my back. Here, hop on; you wanna go to Pony Joe’s and get a donut?”
Swiftwing jumped onto Soarin’s back and wrapped his forelegs around his neck. Dash looked on, smiling to herself. She was envious of the little colt, and the idea of that made her giggle quietly. She noticed Soarin drop Swiftwing from his back and kneel again.
“You have to slide your arms under my wings, otherwise I can’t flap them. Here... like that... yes! Perfect! Okay, you ready champ?”
The shiny blue pony was ecstatic.
“Here, take these!”
Soarin took off his goggles and handed them to his son. Swiftwing fastened them to his head, still beaming.
“Wait, but then you won’t have a pair for yourself!”
Soarin chuckled.
“I’ve been flying for a long time bud, I only need the goggles during performances. Even then, it’s more of a liability thing; I can do all my tricks without them. On top of that, we’re not gonna be making any Sonic Rainbooms today. I’ll be fine.”
“Did you SEE THAT yesterday?! That mare is amazing! Why don’t you guys let her join the Wonderbolts? She’s fantastic!”
Soarin chuckled yet again.
“You like her?”
“Oh my Celestia yes! She’s fast, she’s cool, and she’s... really pretty.”
Soarin laughed once more at the irony and prepared to take off, quickly changing the subject.
“Next practice, I’ll get you a pair of your own goggles. Do you want my model? Spitfire’s? Fleetfoot’s? Whichever you want, they’re yours.
“Of course I want your model dad, but... they’re the most expensive. I was looking at them in the Wonderbolts catalouge; just get me the least expensive ones.”
“Swifty,”
“Don’t call me that!”
“Swift, I don’t have to pay for my own goggles; don’t worry about it. I’ll get you a pair. Do you have friends that want any also?”
“Sure I do, but if they had them, it would make me having them less special!”
“Fair enough; they’re yours.”
With that, Soarin gingerly ascended, careful not to startle his son. They flew off towards downtown Canterlot, with Swift’s voice echoing through the skies.
“WEEEEEE!!!!!”
Dash breathed a sigh of relief. She knew she had witnessed a very private exchange, but she was glad it had assuaged her fears that Soarin wasn’t the colt she thought he was. In fact, he seemed to be even better than she initially suspected. She glanced back at the mansion and thought about how rude that Silver Unicorn was; how did somepony like Soarin end up fathering a foal with someone like her? She took off and headed back to her room to prepare for the evening. It would be another test; would Soarin tell her the truth as to what his obligation had been? If he didn’t tell the truth, what would that mean? Would he be lying maliciously? To protect her feelings? To protect his privacy?
Dash shook her head as she flew. He hadn’t even lied to her yet; maybe he’d be forthcoming. It certainly wasn’t fair to judge him before she knew what he’d say, so for the time being, she put it out of her mind and her thoughts crept back to the moment in the shower earlier that morning...
END OF CH 4
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What a twist!
And how sweet! 
I can't wait to see where this goes now! 
Now this is interesting. Looking forward to see how this plays out.
Ooooo, didn't see that coming. I like how your 'parody' fic is better than some genuine Soardash fics I've read.
Did not expect this! But still loved it anyway
Cwn't wait for the next chapter
Swiftwater
Swiftwing
whats his name then??
can't wait for next chapter
695123
I typed swiftwater? Musta been an autocorrect. Thanks for the info.
Oooooo Rainbow Dash is going to get it
But... I wanted Dash and Soaring to be together... and the whole accidental pregnancy with Swiftwing left a huge crack in it. I mean, it makes me smile how soaring is such a great father to him... but Rainbow Dash might not want to "date" him any more, because of the kid Soaring has to raise...
ARGH! It's so frusturating!
Excellent story, though
697170 Don't worry; I want Soarin and Dash to be together as well. So does my girlfriend. Considering we're the ones writing the fic, you can rest assured that things will turn out okay...
Or maybe not!
Eddagon says it right, this is better than most SoarinDash fics out there. It isn't perfect though--it felt a bit rushed when Dash was first moving in on Soarin' when they woke up, but otherwise, I can't find anything to improve. (A note--Soarin' being a dad will never be part of my headcanon, but you're doing it quite well.)
2 updates! Awesome story so far, this is becoming a lot better than just a parody!
708022
^^ehs scixy and eh konws it.
Love this! Keep em coming!
lol, dash is such a slut.
717427
Dont cha know it ?
This seems all too familiar to my life in the 90s.
I ADMIT IM ACTUALLY HURT AS HELL WHEN I KNEW THIS BUT THIS IS FUCKING IRONIC AND IM DYING AND IM HURT TOO IDK