The Beginning {RE-EDITED}
… It kinda feels weird being bored now after the kind of morning I just had.
That’s what I am though. Bored. The home/spire is clean from top to bottom. Books are back in place, pillows fluffed, kitchen clean… you know, the usual. Everything’s swept, everything’s dusted, and the windows are so dangerously clean that a pegasus might accidentally crash into them... again!
Yet Dusk’s still not back.
“What to do what to do?" I spoke to myself as I thumb through my latest romance novel. I don’t really want to start a new chapter of my journal yet out of fear that my pony friend might come running back in at anytime. I had picked up my latest fictional book from out of my basket and began reading it not too long ago, but I was too nervous to concentrate on it; nervous about the rest of today. I’ve relived this day about a hundred times in my mind. Though my memories are still a bit foggy on minor parts and details, I still remember the overall structure pretty well.
Twilight reads book, Twilight has Spike send a letter, Celestia acts the usual troll I now know she is and tells Twilight to go to Ponyville. Twilight runs into Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy in an order I’ll eventually remember, Nightmare Moon appears, friendship happens, day is saved. The End.
Thrilling storytelling but, hey, it’s my life… I think. There is the slight possibility that, with Twilight being Dusk in this universe and me being Spike, things might be different... But after my encounter with Solaris today? I’m not worried, not worried in the slightest.
… Well I’m slightly worried about dying (again) out of boredom at the moment, but that’s minor in the grand scheme of things.
“Wish I had something better to do though,” I grumble to myself, unable to pay attention to the novel I had, at one point, been enjoying. Say what you will about candy-colored equines, they sure do make mean romance stories. “Just wish I could enjoy it,” I groan next, snapping the book shut and then setting it down roughly on the table next to me.
A wrapped red present suddenly falls off of the small stand when I do, landing softly on the ground. I stare at it at first before, with a start, remembering what exactly it was.
“Oh shoot!” I say, jumping to my feet and picking the item up in both of my claws. “I totally forgot to deliver this!”
It was my gift for Lunardanseur! I got it at the same time I got Dusk’s book with the last of my allowance! I was supposed to drop it off at his party at the castle while I was there today! Nuts! I hope I have time still to…
… Wait... This is Dusk we’re talking about here! Hehe, silly me; of course I’m going to have time! He likes to take it nice and easy with his readings when it comes to forced days off. It’ll probably be another hour or so before he gets to the important part.
“Which means,” I snicker to myself, heading towards the spire’s entrance with a smile on my face. “I probably have more than enough to stop by the party, say hi… sample a few of Donut Mary Joe’s goods on the way back, hehe…”
My lips are salivating just thinking about it. That pony can make a mean desert! With crushed sapphire sprinkles… Ahhhh~ Yes please!
With a tune on my lips and a new skip in my step, I happily make my way towards the doors with my present in my outstretched claws. I hope Lunardanseur likes it! I know he collects adorable things like this. Unafraid of his masculinity; a stallion after my own hea-
SLAM!
HI DOOR! NICE TO SEE YOU TOO!
Having been knocked back a good five feet into the flipping air, I crash rather harshly back down to Equestrian terra firma in a powerful daze thanks to the door’s abrupt assault. Ow…
“Barb?! BAAARRRRBBBB?!” suddenly cries out a masculine voice, seeking my attention. It's through blurry eyes that I make out Dusk Shine as he continues to call out my name. “Barb…?” He shouts one last time before spotting me laying there in a heap. “There you are,” notes the purple unicorn with the pink highlights as he dashes right on past me and into his personal library. He didn't even offer me a hoof to get back up with. Ugh… Dusk, you make it so incredibly hard for me to justify my decision to stay by your side some days…
“Quick,” he soon demands as I follow him into his main study. I nurse the new bruise on the back of my head with the slow soothing motions of my claw. “Find me that old copy of Predictions and Prophecies!” orders the young stallion as he ran this way and that between the shelves… only to stop actually, if briefly, to look at me. His eyebrow rose as he did. Slowly he points a hoof my way. “What’s that for?”
Confused as well, I turn my body... and find my now ruined gift to Lunardanseur completely lanced through thanks to my stupidly spiked tail.
“Well,” I start to explain with a huff, pulling the ruined box off of myself. “It was a gift for Lunardanseur, but…”
With impeccable timing, the now destroyed stuffed bear falls out of the wrapped box and onto the floor, delivering one last ironic squeak.
“Oh Barb,” Dusk scolds me angrily as he use his muzzle to knock over the piles of research books I had set aside for him like he asked. Jerk. “You know we don’t have time for that sort of thing!”
'That sort of thing?' What? Talking to ponies? This colt can be so insufferable some days. “But we’re on a break!” I try to argue, only to be ignored as the unicorn lit up his horn in a magenta light and starts tearing books right off the shelves. And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why this pony needs an assistant. He’s only a neat freak when he feels like it.
Bleh.
“No, no, no,” Dusk grumble himself as each book fails to be the right one. I think I know where the one he motioned is... I quickly scamper up a nearby shelving latter in the hopes of procuring the book before this unicorn literally explodes… again. “No, no, no! Urgh! Barb!”
“It’s over here!” I yell, waving the tome in my claw in the air for him to see. I take a look at it for a moment, to make sure it's the right copy…
… only to then meet the floor face first as I'm roughly yanked along with it down to Dusk’s level via levitation magic. “Ah,” he spoke simply as he takes it from my grip over to his desk, promptly ignoring the pain he had just caused me.
“J-jerk…” I whimper, pulling myself up and rub my now bruised nose. Is it bleeding…? It’s not bleeding. Good. “What would your mother say if she knew you were treating a lady this way, Dusk?” I plead as I tiredly start to pick books up from off the floor. I just cleaned up around here too...
My words are spectacularly ignored as the young stallion delves right on into his book, flipping through pages rapidly. He was probably looking for something that caught his eye. Typical.
“Elements, elements,” he mutters to himself as he searches. “E, E, E, E… Aha! Elements of Harmony.”
The world around me suddenly freezes. I remain where I stand on my latter as my claw stays outstretched in the process of balancing a pile of books in need of being reshelved.
“See… The Man in the Moon?” Dusk whispers to himself, completely unaware how in shambles my brain is right now thanks to the realization that ‘Oh crap! The cameras are rolling!’
“... The Man in the Moon?” I eventually ask from my latter, not looking Dusk in the eyes. The lines… the lines were… were… “I-... isn’t that just an old ponies' tale?” That's right, right? That’s what Spike said in the episode himself… right?
… Does it even matter anymore? I didn’t realize that this conversation, that this whole scenario right now, was the first one from the show! I didn't realize until just, freaking, now.
A chill ran up my spine as I keep on shelving. My mind is elsewhere as Dusk keeps on talking. Something about the Nightterror, something about the Elements of Harmony; I'm not listening to a single word he's saying. My mind is completely gone as I suddenly feel the eyes of thousands upon me. Good lord, I-I hadn’t thought of it until just now… but are people watching us? A-are they watching me?
Suddenly the world is just as big and scary again as it had been when I first hatched.
“Barb! Do you know what this means?”
“No…” I say honestly, continuing to shelve robotically. People might be watching me right now… I-I’m being watched... I’m being watched I’m being watched I’m being wat- “W-whoa!” I wail abruptly, having lost my balance on the ladder completely. With an “Umph!” I soon find myself deposited across Dusk’s back, him having rushed over to break my fall... just like Twilight did.
Oh my God, such déjà vu!
All my memories of this whole stupid episode are flooding back into my mind as we speak! I can almost see Spike from the audience's point of view now! Next Dusk is going to thrust a scroll and quill into my claws, try to get me off his back, and then he'll tell me to write to Solaris tha-
“Are you okay?”
Knocked right out of my dangerous thoughts, I blink blankly as I turn my head to look at Dusk from my position atop his back.
“... What?” I offer dumbly, my brain retracing the past and trying to remember this scenario from the cartoon show.
“That was a nasty fall,” Dusk points out plainly, gesturing his head towards the latter. “Just wanted to make sure my number one assistant hadn’t hurt herself.”
I resume blinking blankly.
I… I don’t remember that line from the show. I don’t remember it at all. Is it just because it's been too long and I don’t remember it properly anymore… or…?
I decide to test the waters a little. “Er… no more than the last fall did, Dusk, or the door…”
The result of this was the sight of a unicorn cringing.
“Oh… Right…” the young stallion admits meekly, cheeks bright red. “I, er… S-sorry… I-I’m just so excited though!” he explains, bouncing back to his usual self. “I think I’m on to something big here, Barb! Big! Like, the world-is-about-to-be-covered-in-eternal-darkness big!” His eyes then became the beacon of determination I had come to expect from the brilliant, unstable and occasionally insane, unicorn. “And I need you to take a letter to the Prince, please.”
Twinkletwinkle
Numbly I soon find the scroll and quill I had been expecting being levitating over to me, along with Dusk’s short tail being held straight in order for me to dismount from him safely out of this reverse saddle I was now in. I stare at both items for a second, then Dusk Shine…
… before gripping them both in my claws and jumping off of him altogether with the aid of his pseudo springboard tail. “Okie dokie!” I chime happily as I land, my earlier fearful moment having subsided completely.
Yes this is repeating the same events as the show; yes Dusk is still Twilight and I, it would seem, am still Spike. The scenario, the dialogue, and even the characters might all remain the same… But this is my Dusk, my Equestria, and my life. I shouldn’t be scared to flub a line or two, or fear a crowd I’m never going to meet. All I should focus on is living this life my way and no one else's.
“My Dearest Teacher…”
Haha! "Enough about that though," I muse to myself. "No time to mourn the past or fear the future!"
Scriblescrible
"Lets instead do the human thing and enjoy the hell out of the now."
Let the show begin.
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I hope that we eventually get to see Spike and Barbara meet up. That, and I have a feeling that Barb is still going to fall in love with Elusive no matter how hard she tries not to.
Phew, when I saw the Complete tag, I was shocked since I thought this story had quite a bit left to it. Good to hear there's still more to come.
I liked it, but I would have liked it even more without the never-ending Celestia-bashing and the insistence that Celestia is a troll. Seriously, stop it. That major grievance still couldn't entirely ruin a very interesting concept, however, so, if I had to give the story as a whole a rating...
8 out of 10. It would have been as much as a 9 or a 9 and a half, but the anti-Celestia message was too sour to fully ignore. I wanted to give it a 7.5, but that seemed too harsh.
Note: There is no canon on who exactly raised Spike, that is true. The question was once asked of Lauren Faust, however, and in her mind it had been Celestia who had raised Spike. Since that is the closest to a canon statement about the matter we have, I like to take that as my headcanon (until the show comes and ruins it). Now we can easily handwave this off in this story as it being an AU and that Solaris isn't Celestia, but the end of the previous chapter showed Celestia, not Solaris, and I can't quite see Celestia ditching her own adopted son like that, sorry.
Still, an 8 out of 10 is still very positive, no? By no means did I think of this as a bad story. There were just some aspects of it that I didn't like, which is normal and happens with practically every story one reads.
5736951 That's actually a nice observation. I enjoy hearing Barb's sarcastic thoughts towards comparing her universe and the one in the show and how she is determined not to let the events of the show dictate her own new life. And then possibly having to witness her sudden mental battle in becoming attracted to a male horse. Or maybe the author's just going to go like this...
*Barb upon seeing Elusive*: "Oh no! Nooo no no no... Spike might have made googly eyes on that white unicorn in that cartoon but I am NOT in any way shape or form attracted to that horse! Moving along..."
5737175
That seems fair; if there was one aspect of a story that I didn't like, yet I liked the rest, then that would be about the same score I would give it.
I never felt that I was writing a "hate on Celestia" kind of thing though, speaking honestly; only a "Celestia is kind and wise but not infallible" kind of message instead. I can see how it could be interpreted that way though; the second to last chapter really paints Solaris in a negative light more so then the previous ones did. It was hinted at and foreshadowed that it was bad, and I ultimately delivered, but I can again see how that could rub some people the wrong way.
The "Celestia Raised Spike" argument is a head cannon I don't really accept, though I know it's a popular one because of its source. I don't because I see things like Spike bowing lowly and fearfully to her in the beginning to season 4 (which will have an explanation when we get there) and how little screen time they share (which could be said about A LOT of ponies and Spike, granted) and I just can't interpret it as Spike seeing her as a motherly character... Accept maybe the "You're not mommy" line from season one. Still funny.
At the end of the day this is still just my own take on how Spike's early life went down, as told through the eyes of another. The bit at the end of nine... well... I'm afraid you'll have to wait and see what that actually means!
The next leg of the story is obviously going to be more focused on other ponies, though Solaris will still be prevalent as "Spike is off on official business" will be used as an excuse for the two to interact off screen. I'll still write it as I usually do, as I think two such characters would actually react to one another, but I will take your criticism into account as I do. Perhaps I'll earn that 9 or 9.5 next time
Wish me luck!
-Derply
5737360
*Stealth edits to two years* You saw nothing.
dakiniland.files.wordpress.com/2012/09/my-little-pony-men-in-black-flashy-blinky-thing.gif
Oh thank the lord this isn't complete yet, I demand continuing until the end of your life!
Let the games begin!
5737229
No, she's definitely going to be head-over-heels for Raristallion (Elusive?)... Or something very similar. The hints as to why are already there.
Part 1's over! And it's good!
I especially wanted to mention when Dusk takes a moment to make sure Barb is okay after the fall. It didn't happen in the show, though. Is Barb having a different effect on Dusk, or was it missing from the show because it didn't fit in? Or... is it sorta depressingly a gender thing, where Spike is a tough boy and thus Twilight is never motivated to care, and Barb is a little girl who, even if Dusk can bring himself to be neglectful of her, he cannot bring himself to actually ignore her being hurt?
5737576
Hehe, sorry but I can't answer that yet! All three guesses are entirely possible, but you and Barb are still going to have to solve the mystery on your own
Part two will contain more clues to help you out though, I assure you! I hope I'll see you then!
5737465
Just this life though, right? I can take a break in the next?
And now we wonder just how things will play out, now that something — seemingly — is different than how it was. Let's hope that dear Barbara is able to cope with the butterfly effects in her stomach.
On with the show!
5737656 Mm, we shall see. let's test this life's performance.
I liked this story and will be waiting for the sequel. I don't know why, but the use of "Man in the Moon" was just not punny enough for me. I guess "Stallion in the Moon" doesn't roll of the tongue quite as well, but I demand more horse puns next story.
5738924
More Horse Puns for the Horse god
WHICH MEANS I MUST ADD MOOOORRRREEEE
5736951 She did mention he husband was a tailor in her previous life so maybe Elusive might end up being a lot like him and that's why spike and barb fall for them.
Good job.
Here, I'll tell you good job in rainbow.
Good job.
At least she didn't randomly wave to the camera and yell, "Hi, Mom!"
5739649 More like "Hi Ashley!"
Bring on the cosmic justice! And cog in the machine updates!
5739718
Heh, more like just "Hi Ash!" Remember, genderbent universe
you need to write more of this. now.
please?
5740438
Hmmmm... Alright! But just because you asked nicely
Expect the sequel to be made available towards the end of this month!
I hope there isn't going to be any Barb chasing after Elusive in the same way Spike does with Rarity. That would be... cringe-worthy. Unlike Spike, Barb does know what is like to be an adult so hopefully she will act accordingly.
Also, I don't think that the negative aspects revealed of Solaris is "bashing". The story is written from the point of view of Barb, who has her own thoughts, perceptions, biases, opinions, etc. All of these in regards to the Prince will shine through.
5746035
Yeah, I may be an multiverse "aficionado", but Bioshock's take on it left even me scratching my head at times... I still enjoy the story though over Bioshock 1's, but that one had the better gameplay so it kinda balances out in the end!
Also, because I read your message while at work, I had to read the lyrics first before listening to the actual song. I agree with you that they totally match up with the story! So much so that, before actually listening to the song, I was imagining it being sung by Barbara... You can probably guess now how much I was laughing my head off when I actually got home to listen to it XD
5747157 It's not like I don't enjoy concepts of alien dimensions or parallel universes: Hell, one of my favorite novels is Michael Crichton's Timeline. But my problem with the way Bioshock Infinite handled the concept of alternate realities is (spoiler alert for any casual observes who haven't played the game but just happen to be reading this comment) entire universes being created to enact every single possibility isn't feasible in the slightest due to laws of conservation of mass, so all the matter and energy needed to create and sustain an alternate dimension is never going to just whip itself into existence over something as relatively meaningless as an individual's choices. But considering the existence of the Rule 63 Luteces, alternate universes aren't created just by choices, and hypothetically could be created from things that are ultimately innocuous and inconsequential, like the quantum state of any single particle, so now what constitutes as a possibility that a skewed plane can be created from is just getting incomprehensibly absurd. Worst of all though, it means these "choices" aren't even being made by you, since every person's action is merely the result of the multiverse spawning clones to enact those possibilities, meaning that you're just a pawn of the multiverse and your concept of practicing free will is a worthless illusion. Spoony also articulated these concepts fairly well in his video commentary on the game, and I'd recommend checking it out if you find obsessive-compulsives over-analizing cockamamie things either engaging or entertaining.
I could talk for hours about why I find that game stupid, but all things considered, I've since gone on record as saying that Bioshock Infinite still handles the concepts of alternate realities better than Equestria Girls fucking does.
Yeah, I can imagine the chuckles that reading lyrics that ties in eerily well to a story featuring magic talking ponies, and then getting hit with a brooding bass line, dark guitar riffs going straight for your throat, machine guns fired from double kick-drums, and guttural roars that would otherwise be unintelligible without said lyrics. 'Course, I did say it was Polish death metal, so what were you expecting?
Tough that is one of the reasons I love metal as much as I do: the diversity of topics that can be covered through prosaic lyricism means it can delve into unconventional concepts, and further can be applied to a whole slew of relevant tangents... even ponies.
Christian '... but it's not like entire universes are made from the connection...' Harisay
5752841
Yeah, needless to say that I accidentally skipped over the Death Metal part of your message the first time through
As for the rest; I'll need to check out that video sometime, as my gut reaction to there being a conservation of mass issue with a multiverse theory is that such creations of existence would have to exist on a higher plane then our own. Stuff like Equestria Girls would have to be in the same plane though as neither world possess knowledge of the other's dimension... I'm probably going to need to educate myself a little bit more before I can defend that opinion
5753712 Well, I don't know your tastes in music or what genres/bands you enjoy most, but the song still fits, yeah? And I know it may be a bit out of left field and that people automatically tie subject matters to what they already know, however limited their knowledge pool may be. but I do try to have that solid familiar ground whenever I make analogies like that... Still, it's a good song though, right?
Though, pray tell, what precisely were you initially expecting purely based on the lyrical content?
What, like all the universes where those different choices where made already coexisted simultaneously? I don't know if the game ever established that was the case. From what I remember it more heavily implied that universes are created as the result of probability, not existing for the sake of probability itself. Though if that's not what the game was implying, then it's another example of haphazard story-telling. And to be honest, I don't feel like going back to check; I've already dropped over $60 on that game for the disc and all the DLC, and played through it twice more than I should have.
But just to add in salt to injury (pun intentional), guess what game is currently being offered for a free download on Xbox Live's 'Games With Gold' promotion?
Yep.
I'll still attest the game is better than Equestria Girls though, because even if it's goofy and stupid, I can at least explain why alternate universes exist in Bioshock Infinite, whereas in EG, having a world where the Mane Six are human teenage girls still going to high school, which Celestia is the principal of, and Spike is a fucking dog, is a congealed sloop of puerile whimsies straight out of the worse fan fictions in our community. Seriously: I've seen posts by Wanderer D himself where he's stated that he's seen the 'AU Humane Six in high school' fan fiction dozens of times over, and each one is as hackneyed in its concept and delivery as it is stillborn.
Actually, said video of me proclaiming Bioshock Infinite handles alternate realities better than Equestria Girls doesn't exist yet. It's part of the footage for our up and coming review of Equestria Girls, which is unfortunately stuck in a bit of a production Hell at the moment since I don't have the software I need to accomplish certain technical aspects for said review, and the process of saving up for them is a long and arduous one given how dirt poor I am.
The only feature-length video under The Harisay Brothers name at the moment is our two-part review of 'The Crystal Empire,' and that one gets... rather heated.
- Christian 'Nothing that can't be picked apart' Harisay
Great story! Interesting seeing how all the 'In Spite Of A Nail' come together! I really hope we see some 'For Want of a Nail' though, as commented by people before me.
Oh! Yay! It's happening! The Butterfly Flaps!
Typo:
"ponie’s tale"
More typos in previous chapters... most can be found by running it though a spellchecker?
5793552
Thanks! Spelling errors are bound to happen, even as I run this through both gdoc's spellchecker and this site's own, which surprisingly picks up quite a bit more then the former.
I've also been going through this story without an editor, because of my gimmick involving it; it's a weekly updating story! Every single chapter was written within a week of each other, yes even the 14K word one!
The sequel will follow a similar format. I hope you will enjoy it as well, and fell free to point out any other mistakes along the way. Lord knows I need the help
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