Boredom did not suit the spirit of chaos.
Now, this wasn’t really a surprise, as boredom didn’t particularly suit anyone, but it especially did not suit Discord.
It was just so... boring.
And Discord hated boring.
It was just that a statue didn’t get much activity. He was in a relatively secluded part of the gardens now, after being freed by three simple fillies- he really did have to find a way to thank them, it was only polite- and the only things to see were the grass growing and bees buzzing.
Oh, and the birds using him as their personal toilet, that was fun, too.
There weren’t even flowers around here! Just hedges and grass and green green green green-
Pink?
Oh, now this was a change. And a delightful one, too! Pink was such a wonderful color. Bright and bouncy and in your face, deliciously chaotic- the color of cotton candy, strawberry ice-cream, taffy, cupcake frosting... the color of sugar, pure, beautiful sugar. Oh, he loved pink!
He did not, however, love the pony underneath the pink fur.
And dear Celestia, (although she was nothing close to dear to him,) why should he? This sugary menace was one of six little reasons he was in this predicament in the first place! Sure she was the most tolerable of the bunch, the only one with even a slight appreciation for his work, but he still didn’t like her.
He did, however, like cupcakes, and she happened to have those with her, so he wasn’t completely annoyed.
Just a bit miffed, maybe.
The pony’s eyes went wide as she approached the statue, no longer giggling and hopping, and she gulped.
“H-heya, Discord!” she squeaked. “How’re you doing?”
Well, that was a surprise. She was actually trying to talk to him? Nobody did that- well, Luna did, sometimes, and that was alright. Celestia did too, but he always blocked that out, not particularly liking the constant talk of his wasted potential and redemption.
Gag.
“So, uh, I was thinking it’s gotta get lonely and everything, being here all by yourself, and nopony should be alone in their birthday!”
...What?
The pony laughed a little. “Well, maybe not your birthday... It’s April Fool’s day, though, and that’s when most ponies think your birthday is. It would make sense, you know! Buuuut...” she put a hoof to her chin in thought, “You don’t like making sense, so maybe it doesn’t! But if you really don’t like making sense, then you’d make sense, to confuse everyone... buuuuut-”
If Discord had any control of his limbs, he would clamped her mouth shut by this point, or at least told her to be quiet, but no, he had to suffer. Damn it...
Eventually she just shrugged. “Well, even if it’s not your birthday, it’s a holiday dedicated to chaos, and you shouldn’t be alone for that!”
Was it April Fool’s already? He supposed that made sense- he had a little more strength today, what with all the chaotic energy going around. He should have assumed it was April Fool’s.
Then again, logical thinking wasn’t exactly his forte.
Wait... He shouldn’t be alone on a holiday dedicated to chaos?
If he had a heart, it might have been touched. But he didn’t- he’d replaced it with a kidney long ago, just to shake things up. But still, that was... nice of her. He never would have said so, of course, even if he could, but a small part of him appreciated it.
A very small part. An unnecessary part- maybe his appendix.
As he was pondering his kidney-heart, Pinkie Pie was setting up an array of sweets. “I was hoping you could eat these! I dunno how you could though, so maybe you just wanna look at ‘em? Besides, what’s a chaos party without food, right? I mean, this is a party, right? Sure, we’re the only ones there, but that’s still a party! Much better than a party all by yourself! I had that once, and that was no fun at all.... I was really sad, ‘cause I thought my friends all hated me, and I started talking to rocks and stuff. I guess I’m kinda doing that now, though, huh? Oooh, have you ever had a friend? I mean, you have to have, or you’d be really lonely!” her mind was moving at a mile a minute, and even the lord of chaos was having a bit of trouble figuring out where the conversation had went.
“Anyway!” she stopped her chatter and looked up at the statue, curious. “I kinda wanted to ask you something.”
Did you think I’d be able to talk back? he wondered, a bit amused.
She, of course, couldn’t hear his thoughts, so she looked at him. He was surprised to see she looked... well, he didn’t know. Sad? Grateful? What in the wide world of Equestria could she be thinking?
“Why didn’t you keep me gray? Everyone else stayed gray, but you changed me back before any of my friends got to me. They didn’t question it because it was me, and they know I can do some pretty wonder-tastic things, but I remember you changing me back... Why?”
Ah.
He remembered that clearly. It had been silly of him, of course, but he couldn’t help it.
_______________________________________________________________________________________
“Hey! Get this cloud away from me!” the gray mare growled, glaring up at the cumulous confection with distaste.
“Now, Pinkie, why should I do that?” he laughed. “If I recall, you have a particular fondness for sugar- you should be thanking me!”
The pony looked at him, completely furious. “Are you laughing at me?”
“Oh, now, my dear, you wound me! Why would I do that? I’m simply confused as to why you suddenly don’t appreciate my chaotic gift!”
Pinkie sneered. “Why should I? It’s stupid! Who wants cotton candy clouds? It doesn’t make sense, and it’s silly,” she glared at him and spat out, “I hate silly.”
The draconequus looked surprised, swallowing a strange lump in his throat. “You do?”
“Yeah, I do.”
“But that’s no fun, Pinkie!” Didn’t she like his chaos? She did before... It had been so nice to see someone appreciate his hard work, and now...
“Good. I don’t like fun. All it leads to is laughter, and I hate that.”
There was an irony that Discord could not deny. In his effort to make everything topsy-turvy and chaotic, he had made it so the only other being in the world that had liked it that way, now... didn’t.
“Well, that was rather stupid of me,” he muttered, half to himself.
The mare nodded, a mean smirk on her face. “Yup, you’re stupid!”
The chimera shook his head. “No,” he then tapped her on the nose, watching as the color slowly made its way down her body. “Now I’m stupid.”
Discord couldn’t help but give her a snaggle-toothed grin as the pink flowed through her form, and her dull gray eyes turned back into a sparkling blue.
He justified it to himself by saying that gray was such a boring color, anyway, and it was always nice to have a spot of pink around.
Then he disappeared, leaving a very confused Pinkie in his wake.
_______________________________________________________________________________________
You were too boring that way. Everyone else was improved. You changing wasn’t an improvement.
But, although he found himself actually wanting to say that, he couldn’t. So she looked at him with big blue eyes, puzzling over why he would have done something like that.
“Well... I wish you could talk back. I bet you do too, huh?” she looked at him sheepishly. “You look really scared... I don’t like your statue this time. It doesn’t suit you. I liked the old one better.”
I don’t particularly like either one, personally, but I suppose the first one encapsulated by beauty better, didn’t it?
“Does it hurt in there? Are you hungry? Here,” she jumped up and placed a cupcake in his screaming maw. “Can you taste that? It’s chocolate with cotton candy frosting, I figured you’d like that!”
Actually, he could kind of taste it. It wasn’t half bad, really. If he could have, he would have smiled.
He listened, shocked to find himself interested as she babbled on about all the pranks she would pull today and the different going ons in her life and even became interested in the lives of the other elements. Purely strategic reasons and all that, know your enemy, but still. Who knew Pinkie was such a delight?
Well, perhaps not a delight, but infinitely better than the forest animals that had been his only company. At least she didn’t think of him as a personal port-a-potty.
So when she left, he found himself a bit... disappointed.
“Next time, I’ll bring some pictures of the pranks I pull today! You’d like that, right?”
Actually, yes, that might lift his spirits a bit.
Wait... next time?
He found himself smiling.
“See ya later, Dissy! Nice talking to you!”
Nice talking to you, too... Pinkie Pie.
Looking forward to see where this goes, one chapter and I already think it's really cute.
Discopie? Yes please! Have a favorite and a like!
Me gusta.
5032998 OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG YOUR THE GUY WHO WRITES PINK CHAOS! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *fangirl explode*
5032624 Aw, thank you! Don't worry, I'm already working on chapter two, wo you'll find out soon!
5033044 Yes. Yes I am. And you once went on a killing rampage on my comments demanding I write more chapters. I remember because I thought it was hilarious...and also slightly frightening.
i love it already. pinkie pie is perfectly in character and you have her unique voice down pat. i also like that you didnt make her able to hear discord's inner dialouge, ive seen some fics that give her way more supernatural abilities than is strictly alluded to by the show. while she is a mysterious 4th wall breaker, there is such a thing as taking it too far. right now you have achieved an excellent balance, although of course i'm only on chapter one :P
my only very small criticism is that maybe you could bump up discord's vocabulary a little bit. sometimes his 'voice' runs a little too close to pinkie pie's and
giving him a boost in diction would help make him feel closer to a thousand-plus-years-old spirit as voiced by john de lancie. i also encourage you to go listen to discord's dialogue from the show and study some of his turns of phrase to apply to her fic-discord. and if you really want to get his speech patterns in your head and on the paper than i highly recommend watching De Lancie's work as Q on star trek. youtube has quite a few 'best of q' compilations you could browse through if you dont wanna get too deep into the series.
I've always been of the opinion that Pinkie reforming Discord makes infinity more sense than Fluttershy. Which now that I think about, does seem to suggest that it actually should have been Fluttershy. Huh.
5036070 Yeah i would feel the same if i discordvered i had fangirls or boys.
Great chapter, I'm looking forward to the rest.
For some reason I can actually see Discord turning his heart into a kidney.
Neat! 👀