• Member Since 19th May, 2013
  • offline last seen 9 hours ago


I'm still alive, probably.


While teaching Spike math one afternoon, Twilight comes up with a solution of 'sixty-nine'. Spike can't stop laughing enough to tell her what's so funny, so she's going to find out.

Oh, she will find out.

Edited by Syeekoh

Preread by RainbowRick, thanks to both of you!

This was originally meant to be my sixty-nine follower special, but other stuff came up and...yeah. I eventually got around to it. Enjoy!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 116 )
2D #1 · Sep 16th, 2014 · · ·

0/10 made me find the cover image for you

8/8 m8 gr8 b8



thanks m8

I didn't expect you to write it so quickly. I thought it would have taken a bit longer. But still, you pulled off what I failed to. Bravo! If I had actually took part, I would have asked you to put this:

Two immature guys on the internet attempting to be funny with sexual innuendos.

Of course, that's not the case, so don't worry. :raritywink: Also,

She lost the grip on the fabric she was sewing, and the machine went wild as the fabric was torn violently in two.

My idea! You used it! You gave me bookworm, I gave you a machine falter.

And as a plus, rather than a nitpick, it's Apple Bloom, not Applebloom. Others would call you out on this, so just a heads up.


Nor did I. The urge to write just struck me. :twilightsmile:

And thanks! Fixed! :derpytongue2:

Majin Syeekoh


Hahahaha Pony say 69 is a funny number to say

Oh I can't help but feel a little guilty for enjoying this one. It was really funny in a very Carry On film kind of way.

Compliments on the story it certainly made me laugh.

Can you make a sequel called Penal Code?

This was really funny :rainbowlaugh:
That end was priceless! Though for some reason I knew that was coming :fluttershysad::twilightblush::trollestia:

Well, it is always nice when things come to a happy ending.

Did...Did Fluttershy and Twilight seriously had 69 sex in the end?

Ahhhh the adorkable bookworm strikes again. Lmao. Very funny.



Thanks! :pinkiehappy:

This is probably the closest I will ever get to writing clop, so most likely not, no.

You knew it was 'coming' did you? :unsuresweetie:

Bahaha! Ohhh you :yay:

Maaaaaaybe. :pinkiesmile:

Thanks! :yay:

Yeah, but it surprised me it came so fast. Even Fluttershy didn't see that coming so quickly. :rainbowlaugh::trollestia:

“Ye darn kids! I’ll git ya’ll yet!”

Ah suppose it’s time ah tell ya’ll about how the birds and the bees work.


“Hehe, why don’t ya’ll go help your big brother lil’ sis

“Twilight...ya’ll can’t just go around saying things like that to friends and family!


This fic should have a Safety Warning that reading this could cause death from to much laughter. Seriously a good fic. Something you want to watch though. It's y'all, and that term [which you used 50% correctly *applauds*] is a second personal plural pronoun. Anywho, loved the fic, and the reactions to Twilight's obliviousness.

that always happens to me, ppl have been asking me because they think im a smart person, i can totally relate to this :derpytongue2:

Ha :moustache: was Spike at first then Rarity was all like:raritycry: and Pinkie was all like:pinkiegasp: then Applejack and Rainbow were all like :ajbemused: :rainbowhuh: and finally Fluttershy was all :yay:

“Rarity, now that’s not being a very considerate friend! I will not stop until I reach a climax to this issue!”

God dammit Twilight!

The drums and cymbal that make the *ba-dum psh* sound are now smoking from too much abuse! :rainbowlaugh:

So that's what it meant! I was all nutz thingy. :applejackconfused: :trollestia::unsuresweetie::pinkiecrazy:

Spike entered the Boutique Laughing his butt off as Rarity was closing up.:moustache:
"SPIKE!" Rarity Roared "What ? Am I not faboulus enough for you!":raritycry:
Spike with his stupid smile "what?":moustache:
Rarity growled "Follow me"
Spike followed closely then all went BLACK.

And that's it Doc my nose was stuck in her back side and I sneezed... She was all Puffed up like a Giant marsh mellow Balloon.:moustache::raritystarry:
The Doc answered "Glad you held on to her tail or we would of never found her":twistnerd:
Spike teared up "will she be all right?" The Doc smiled "No problem as he untied her tail....:twilightoops:
PFEEEEETeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeePhit phit eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee:facehoof:

69 is always good for a laugh:trollestia:

Looks like I need a new gut.

Oh Twi, you surely know how to make it seem like you were doing something completely else :rainbowlaugh:
This was pretty awesome, thanks for the laugh!

oh my Luna, twilight, you are so obvious to what you are saying...


And this was hilarious.

So damn funny!:moustache::twilightblush:

:trixieshiftleft:Man, Twilight's the only one who got any satisfaction. Friggn bullshit.

That was funny, but it would have been funnier if it wasn't as OOC as it is. This story makes no sense beyond it's joke. Sorry.:unsuresweetie:

Twilight you waste of an Alicorn princess....

Bravo! :yay:

Innuendos everywhere.

Much fun was had.

Of course, it probably turns out Spike was laughing because it was a Bill and Ned (Ted) reference...

(Okay, not really, but that's what I always think of when someone says "sixty-nine." Of course, the fact I'm a metal skeleton with no sex drive is also probably responsible...)

she still caught the occasional glimpse of a pony’s tail going around a corner, or a set of eyes dart under a window ledge right before it slammed closed.

Ponyville is such a sexually repressed society that they respond to innuendo as if it's a gunfight in Dodge.


Oh my god :rainbowlaugh: I don't think Mad Moxxi could make that many innuendo's in one day!

This story can be summed up in one phrase:

"Oh, honey..." :applejackunsure:

Anyway, hidden OTP shipping. 10/10 would read again.

"30 seconds later"
She's one of THOSE.

I don't think she expected that show and tell to end so soon. But what can you expect from someone as old as Twilight going that long without that stuff.

Great story. Innuendos and an implied ship. Adorable.

Btw, not sure if it was or wasn't since they weren't named, but was that Button and Sweetie out on a date who blurted out "I like her!" because I can't think of any other white unicorns and brown earth ponies. :P

Could of used more innuendos near the end. Saw no point in being more straight forward there at the end. Nice buck joke though. xD


Alright guys! I'm back from school, how's my fic doi—


...huh...maybe I should make fics about immature sexual jokes more often. :pinkiecrazy:

I'm afraid that's my own inability to describe things properly. :facehoof:

“Oh!” Pinkie darted to the counter and over to another table, where a grey coated earth pony and a white unicorn with an electric blue mane were sharing a shake.



She darted back to the counter and over to another table where the ponies she recognized as Lyra and Bon Bon were sitting, Lyra in her usual strange fashion and Bon Bon just glaring at her.



“Oh in that case,” Pinkie rushed back to the counter, bouncing over to another table, this one with a yellow coated mare with long, braided red hair and a blue coated mare with a purple mane sitting across from her. “What is it?”


fimfiction-static.net/images/story_images/170098_r.png?1404572577 (Two OCs that a friend of mine and myself have and are working on a story for. :yay:)

“I like her!” The latter was followed by a swift smacking sound, originating from the table with the brown earth pony and the white unicorn.


MEANT to be referring back to Vinyl and Octavia, but I put brown instead of grey...my bad guys. :facehoof: Fixing it!

5016781 Welcome back! lol

Honestly, it felt like a great shoutout to Sweetie Belle and Button's first date, furthered by how much more oblivious and terrible said date went with him being a perv making Sweetie smack him in the back of the head.

Yeah, that Sugar Cube Corner scene just felt like you wanted to show us a lot of ponies. But i have to say it was a cute mistake at the end.

Pfffft- that was quite a tease.




uh...you're right! That's totally what I meant to do!

*hastily edits*

And honestly, I wasn't trying to do anything, just meant to show how busy they were at that time of the day. :twilightblush: I guess I could have pulled that off a little better.


That was great fun! Good thing nobody was around when I read that one...with all the laughing, they would have sent me to the loony bin (Luna bin?)



Awwww, I liked the idea of Button having a childish crush on Twilight, to Sweetie's annoyance.

“You...you don’t know?” Twilight slowly shook her head, eying the dragon with a hint of skepticism.

She's as virgin as EV olive oil. No, she does not know.

“Well, let’s see if any of my friends know what it means…”

They know, some from experience.

“Well I was teaching Spike a lesson earlier today, and as we were going over some of our techniques the number sixty-nine was brought up.”

Always use correct context boys and girls.

I couldn't just bend over and take it without knowing what was so funny,


I will not stop until I reach a climax to this issue!”

Shut. Up.

Colgate wiggled her eyebrows, gave her a piece of paper with an address on it and ran off, giggling. Weird.

Any time Twilight.

“She did that with a baby dragon?”

Don't forget dragons become sexually mature much faster than most animals. Yes, he's a baby, he is also capable of fathering children with dragons is own size.:moustache:

“I mean, really,” Twilight continued, the pink pony’s pleas going unheeded, “all I want is some relief. I went to Rarity’s to see if she could help me, but she was already trying to help two other mares and was pretty busy.”


Twilight turned to face Mrs. Cake, her face contorted and her eye twitching slightly. “Why won’t anypony just come out with the truth! What does sixty-nine mean?!” Mrs. Cake’s face went beet red.

Mrs. Cake is a babe. Her husband is the only pony she's ever loved, but there is no limit to what ponies would give for ten minutes with her. She defiantly knows, and this is a town full of perverts and voyeurs, everyone knows.

Pinkie didn't even last a minute before Mrs. Cake told me to get out!

That's an image I am very okay with having.

“Fine! You two have fun bucking, then!” Twilight flicked her tail angrily as she trotted off, leaving Rainbow Dash and Applejack looking beet red.

What I think every time I see another AppleDash fic.

~Thirty seconds and one unsatisfied yellow pegasus later~

Guess Twilight's easy to please.

Funny, about on par with stealing the deed.

I don't get it.

I mean, I got the immature sexual references ("bend over and take it!" :facehoof:), but what is significant about 69?:derpytongue2:

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