Booze and Beds
There was a certain rhythm to cities. When the sun dipped below the horizon and the post work commutes came to their winding ends, the second life of a city began. Restaurant dinner rushes began and the bars and nightclubs threw their doors open to the public. Friends would wander the streets to drink and carouse, young lovers would go on dates and the owners of night time businesses would gladly serve all of them.
Skitch wandered through that rhythm, her hooves pounding out a regular pattern against the concrete streets. Other ponies passed her, going both directions on their way to their own destinations, but one thing stood out on her mind as she worked her way through Manehatten.
No one was looking at her.
Part of her wondered why. She had seen every newspaper that had reached Ponyville- feeding a press machine that was very reminiscent of the yellow journalism of earth’s own 1900’s- so she could only imagine what kind of coverage would exist in a major metropolis that probably had a half dozen papers at least.
But the more she stomped on, the more she began to realize that there were plenty of reasons why they might not be reacting. They had their own problems and destinations in mind, perhaps. Or maybe some of the creatures that passed her in the street just didn’t believe she was dangerous. Approaching things from the ever trusty tool of logic however, there was a simpler explanation.
A lack of recognition.
It was night out, and even with the electric lights that lined the streets it was probably easy to confuse her with some other pony. After all, Skitch reasoned out, green was probably not an uncommon coat color and there were probably hundreds of ponies with art related cutie-marks. It wasn’t like she some black and red alicorn that would stick out like a sore thumb. She blended.
Which lead to the question of what she’d do in two years when she could finally change back to human. Ponyville probably wouldn’t care. They had gotten used to her already, so she doubted that a sudden change in size and stature would do anything to change that. ...She hoped so at least.
But outside that town? Would she be gawked at by everypony every time she set foot outside of Ponyville? Would she even be allowed out of Ponyville?
“Don’t be stupid.” She muttered to herself. “Celestia lets changelings live in Equestria with full rights. She wouldn’t lock you up just for being human.”
Of course, that was down the line, and right now she had to deal with yet another noble attempt to ruin her life. And in the immediate, immediate, she had to find someplace to get a drink.
The sound of horns punched through her misery, their brassy notes buzzing through the night air like a swarm of bees. Skitch snapped her head towards the music, the airy ringing taps of someone keeping time on cymbals and the melodic plinks of a piano rising to join the horns.
The growing crescendo of music flowed through the partially open doors of a club set on a corner of two streets. A rectangular sign- as green as her coat- jutted out from the brick facade of the building, proudly declaring itself as The Black Orchid in brass colored letters. Through the wide glass windows flanking the polished wooden entrance doors she could see dozens of creatures eating, drinking and listening to whoever was playing. It seemed like an interesting place, all things considered. Good enough place to get a drink at any rate.
She had just finished crossing the street with a sudden realization came crashing down on her head.
“My saddlebags are back at the freaking hotel!” She groaned. And her money pouch was in said saddlebags. Which meant no dinner or drinks. “Fuck it.” She sighed, turning about to head back to the hotel.
“Miss Skitch-Sketch?”
She blinked, finding herself face to face with the orange coated stallion from the theatre, Flash Sentry. He was flanked by the diamond dog set builder, Glittering Quartz.
“What are you doing here?” He asked, head cocked.
“Well, I was going to get a drink, but I left my cash back at the hotel.” Skitch sighed. “So, I’m going to go back there and try to forget today has happened.”
“Left it at the hotel huh?” Flash frowned, rubbing his chin with the back of a hoof. “Tell you what, bring the cash with you tomorrow, and I’ll cover you tonight.”
Quartz blinked at that raising an eyebrow at her friend. “Why are you doing this?”
“All of our necks are on the line together.” Flash shrugged. “We should at least be able to find equal relief from alcohol and swing jazz.”
Quartz rolled her eyes but smirked all the same. “Very well. We shall all drink and collapse together like brothers and sisters in arms!”
Skitch followed them inside with a shrug of her own, her ears instinctively flicking back at the sudden surge of volume. The club itself was basically a diagonally angled rectangle, the bar itself on the left wall, while polished hard wood tables and black upholstered seats filled the rest of the room. The exception to this seemed to be the square dance floor that was right in front of the stage. The stage itself was flanked by doors. Ponies balancing trays streamed in and out of it, dancing their way through the tables to deliver food or stopping at the bar to pick up drinks.
And on the stage a jazz band played. At the lead, a lion blared away on a trumpet moving and bobbing his head in time with the beat. A fresh cut rose was tucked into the front pocket of his pale blue button up dress shirt, whose sleeves had been rolled back. Streaks of gray stood out in his dark mane, giving him a distinguished look that- in Skitch’s mind at least- helped give the impression of a man that put the experiences of his life into his music.
The rest of the band was ponies. Two rows of horns backed up the lead, blaring out their own accompaniment, all in matching pale blue shirts with little red bowties, while a final -similarly dressed- stallion tapped out a tune on a pair of symbols. The last member of the orchestra stood out the most, however.
A tea colored mare hammered out her own series of notes on a piano, her hooves dancing over the keys with a liquid quickness, summoning notes that rose and merged with the lion’s trumpet to form a wall of sound.
Half a dozen sets of hooves spun and kicked upon the dance floor. Young and old couples enjoying the night out as they boogied their cares away. Even the patrons still in their chairs seemed to be enjoying the show.
All in all, it was a club full of energy and life where the creatures of the city could kick back and relax, which was exactly what she needed right now. Flash Sentry lead the way picking one of the tables near the wall, about halfway towards the stage.
“You’re kind of lucky.” Flash nodded, sinking into a seat. “You wandered your way straight to one of the hottest clubs in town.”
“I have a knack for supreme coincidence.” Skitch sighed, plopping down next to him. “I’m guessing you know this place?”
“When it comes to jazz and swing music, this is the place to be.” Flash shrugged, waving a hoof for a waiter. “So, what’ll you have?”
“In my mind, there is only one kind of spirit to be drunk when you’re aiming to drown your sorrows. Whiskey. And lots of it. ...And maybe a salad.”
- - - -
While Canterlot was the capital of Equestria, and its central most province (which included Ponyville) each one of the nations sub-divisions had its own center of administration. The Northwitch province sat- appropriately enough- to the northeast of Canterlot, with Manehatten as its center of government.
Duke Blueblood- being the ruler of said province- maintained property in the city, despite the fact that most of his job involved working with the other nobles and lawmakers in Canterlot. But tonight, his Manehatten brownstone was rather busy compared to its usual state. Blueblood sat in the west drawing room (that was where the private telegraph was after all), a glass of port balanced on one of his hooves. One of his favorite records played in the background while he thought.
The room was decorated in a mix of styles. Thick circular rugs imported from Inj and Turkiyya sat atop hardwood floors, while all of the furniture was carved from the finest Taparian woods. Paintings and banners, all depicting the history of his family line, were the main decorations; though a pair of dueling blades hung over the white marble fireplace.
At his side, resting atop a small mahogany table, was a collection of telegraphs. Correspondences hurriedly exchanged back and forth to his fellow conspirators. He had sent messages to everypony, explaining just what Nouveau Riche had implied about the Element Bearers and said about the nobility in general. The response had been almost unanimous across the board.
Riche had stepped over the line and needed to be taken down.
Upper Crust- who had been in Manehatten on business of her own- stood on her hind legs by the fireplace, tapping a pattern out upon the mantle. She was considering the same problem as Blueblood. How to arrange the fall of one of Equestria’s most powerful bankers.
“Where’s Fleur?” Upper Crust asked eventually, angrily slamming her hoof down. “I thought she was going to assist us?”
“I’m sure she’ll be along,” Blueblood answered evenly. “That pony comes and goes as she pleases.”
“Hmmph.” Crust fell back to all four legs, trotting over to the drinks cabinet and beginning to rummage. “Where’s your brandy? You had a full bottle last time I was here.”
“That was months ago. I drank it.”
Hoof falls echoed in the hallway, an elegant white coated unicorn trotting into view a moment later. Fleur de Lis nodded to each pony in turn as she entered the room.
“Gentlestallions. I am so dreadfully sorry that I’m late. Do we have a solution yet?”
“Nope. Blueblood also drank all the brandy.”
“It was my brandy to drink!”
“Boys, calm down.” Fleur smiled, daintily joining Upper Crust next to the liquor cabinet. “Oh dear...you’re out of scotch too?”
Blueblood rolled his eyes. “Can we please discuss things other than my alcohol supply?”
“Just because you never keep it properly stocked around here my darling blueblood.”
“Focus, please!”
“Yes, yes.” Fleur waved a hoof. “It seems to me that the path is obvious. We need Riche’s attention focused elsewhere so that we can go after what he cares about most. His money.”
Blueblood raised an eyebrow. “It seems that you already have an angle my dear.”
“I cooked it up on the way over.” She smiled. “After your message informed me about the situation. For as long as Riche is focused on the human he’ll be blinded to us...he’s far too obsessed with the dear. She will be the thorn in his side.”
“There is one problem with that.” Blueblood frowned. “She’s been backed into a situation where she can’t win.”
“Can we change the nature of the game?” Upper Crust asked, continuing to rummage through the bottles. One was finally extracted with a smile. “Ahh, bourbon.”
Blueblood leaned back in his seat. Upper Crust and Fleur were both correct in their own way. Riche was obsessed with the human, he presumed because she lived in the same town as his granddaughter. If it looked like Skitch had the chance to make the musical a success, Riche would- logically- try to interrupt that. But so long as Flim and Flam were in charge….
He hurriedly shuffled through the stack of telegrams from the other nobles. There had been a particular piece of correspondence he noticed earlier. “Ha!” He laughed, slamming his hoof on the missive. “There it is! Duke Glitter Gold is on our side.”
Glitter Gold controlled the province in which the city of Los Pegasus- and thusly the burgeoning Equestrian film industry- sat. Perfect Pegasus Productions had been expanding aggressively into that area, moving away from their theatre roots.
“We apply leverage against Flim and Flam. Force them to step back and let Skitch run the production on her own. That will infuriate Riche and give us the opening we need.”
“What do we do with it though?” Upper Crust frowned.
“His banks.” Fleur smiled. “They are the heart of his empire. We take them from him.”
“How?” Crust frowned.
Blueblood smirked. “The Lernerian Society. Riche hired them to impersonate Skitch-Sketch. We use them to gut his company from within. Bad loans, bad investments, selling stock in his company to ourselves and our friends. All of it.”
“Excellent!” Fleur beamed. “I shall make contact with the Society.”
“I will stay close to Riche,” Blueblood declared, raising his glass to his friends. “And I will keep his focus off his business.”
“And I will coordinate things with our fellows,” Upper Crust nodded. A glass of bourbon was quickly poured and raised as well. “Perhaps I can even get Skitch’s lawyer involved.
“To our endeavours,” Blueblood declared. “And what is best for Equestria.”
As the alcohol was thrown back with a chorus of cheers, the record that had been steadily spinning away rolled over to one of Blueblood’s favorite songs. A smile forming on his muzzle as the horns began to play, the duke couldn’t help but feel a song rising in his chest.
We are friends are we not?
Upper Crust blinked for a moment, but then picked up the tune with a smirk.
And our interests are the same!
We collaborate, Fluer joined in.
And trust in fate to parcel out the blame!
There are ends we’ve all got, that can justify the means,
We negotiate
Then fabricate the facts behind the scenes.
Keeping all the details vauge and secrets hidden.
Upper Crust puffed up her chest as she rolled onto the next verse.
Safe from the balance sheet of those you trust!
Because history is a story told by the winners fight!
You imply a little
Lie a little
Testifying
Ruin a little
Banker
Who’s going to question what goes on in the middle of the night? Blueblood questioned, glancing about the room.
Not a tinker
Not a tailor
Not his family or Celestia
Or a jailer?
So we all are agreed?
Let’s be vigilant and wise.
We must all pretend our riche friend was caught in his own lies.
For our plan to succeed, to make that stallion broke
Neouveu Riche’s banks must go up in smoke!
Where he’ll find his vaults empty and bare
Not a single coin to his name!
Because history’s a story told by those who make the laws! Fleur cackled, throwing her head back.
We supply a little lie
To help the gullible to buy a little fable.
What will become of the righteous ones who fashioned Riche’s flaws?
The rich
and well respected
shall not be ejected from our table
I’ll be a comfort in her time of shame and anger, Blueblood smiled, staring out a window for a moment.
I’ll be Celestia’s ever faithful acolyte
Every night!
Though part of me wishes Riche didn’t have to languish
But I can see, its him or me
Let him sit there and rot until he’s forgot
Let him rot!
History’s a story told by those who survive!
Let me sign and then initial
It’s the truth if it’s officially the story.
What if the cost is one pony so three more can survive?
He’s the price we have to pay.
So live and fight another day for love and glory!
He was standing in the way!
A threat to justice every day!
So goes the story!
Stick to the story!
Here ends the story! All three ponies finished in a gleeful chorus, falling back into their seats with satisfied and devious, smiles.
- - - -
Flash Sentry’s eyebrow threatened to disappear into his mane as Skitch slung back another shot. The unicorn was drinking more like a minotaur, drinks disappearing down her gullet with an almost reckless abandon.
“Miss Skitch? I think you’ve had enough.” He declared at the thump of another glass hitting the table.
“What?” She blinked. “Why?”
“Because. You’re already drunk.”
“Quite.” Quartz added, before taking a sip of her own ale.
Skitch hiccuped, swaying slightly in her seat. “Na...na, I’mma okay. I know my limits.”
Flash highly doubted that. But before he could voice that fact, Skitch jabed a shaky hoof at him across the table. “What kinda name is Flash Sentry anyway?” She demanded, swaying sharply in her seat this time. “Yer cutie-marks are notes.”
Up went the other eyebrow. “Says the human currently wearing a pony body and using a pony name.”
Her ears flicked back, pressing almost flat against her head. “Ah-ah come on,” She raised her forehooves defensively. “That...that’s just not fair. I mean...how rediculoush would I look running around with a human name when I’m a pony?”
She giggled with drunken abandon, suddenly grabbing her own tail. “I mean, lookit this! I has a tail! And it’s all soft and fluffy an’ swishy. I would not desp...despagae...insult this tail with a human name.”
Glittering Quartz let loose a bark like laugh, throwing her head back. “Yes. You are quite thoroughly drunk! Sober creatures are not so obsessed with their own appendages!”
“H-hey! I neva had a tail before!” Skitch argued back, leaning forward and almost face planting onto the table. “Besides...tails are cool.” She continued with a sharp nod of her head. “It’s like a whole nother part of my body I can emote with.”
“As the mare says.” Glittering nodded.
“Bah.” Skitch snorted waving a hoof at Flash. “I thought we talkin’ about you pretty boy. Come on. There’s gotta be a story about those flank tattoos.”
“I don’t really know you well enough to talk about that.”
“Come on! Tell me!”
“Nope.”
“Do it.”
“No.”
“Dooooo itttt!”
Flash rolled his eyes. “Fine. My dad was Blazing Sentry, and his dad was Stalwart Sentry. They were both tied to the military. Grandad was in the army, and dad was in the Royal Guard.”
Skitch nodded, blinking blearily through her alcohol induced haze.
“Naturally, being from a military family there was a lot of pressure for me to continue in their hoof steps. Hence the name. But I’ve always liked music. Writing and humming tunes at home. So, I followed my family’s desires...just long enough to get my Guard Bill. Then I went to school for my true passion.” He shrugged. “I’ve been thinking about legally changing my name.”
Skitch smiled, leaning forward slightly. “That...sounds nice. Thought of anything yet?”
“Crashing Crescendo!” He answered, sweeping a hoof dramatically through the air.
Skitch blinked, then snorted. Then she launched into a full fledged cackle rocking back and forth in her chair. Flash glowered, doing his damndest to ignore the light pokes in the side from Glittering.
“I told you,” She lightly laughed. “Pay up.”
“Later.” He pouted.
“That shounds like a bad music based superhero!” Skitch giggled, wiping tears from her eyes. “Here comes the Crashing Crescendo to save the day!”
“Thanks for that,” Flash sighed. “Really, thanks.”
“Ah, why so serious Flashie?” Skitch chuckled, waving one of the servers over. “I mean...I get it. You want a name that...fits better.”
Flash’s cheeks burned from the ribbing, but he gave a simple bob of his head in a form of response. Skitch nodded, glancing up at the server that was at her side. “More whiskey please.”
Flash frowned. Skitch was obviously not aware of her own limits and if she kept going, she could possibly hurt herself. Best to focus her attention on something else.
“Actually,” Flash interrupted, sharing a quick glance with Glittering. “How about you join me on the dance floor?”
“The dance floor?” Skitch deadpanned. “Yeah, no. I’ll just stay here with my booze.”
Sliding out of his chair, Flash gently took one of Skitch’s fetlocks in his hooves. “Come on. You’ve drank enough for the night.” Pulling her away from the table, he led the drunk unicorn over to the dance floor.
Glittering Quartz watched them go, making a cutting motion with her paw as she faced the server again. “That unicorn? She doesn’t get served anymore tonight.”
“Yes mam.”
Taking a spot on the outside edge of the group of dancing ponies, Flash gave Skitch his friendliest smile. “So, ever danced before?”
Skitch half blinked, half glared at him. “I was crap at dancin’ on two legs, let alone four of the stupid things.”
“Come on.” He grinned back, giving her a slight poke. “Just give it a try.”
Still glowering, Skitch raised one of her hooves and gave it a little shake before putting it back down. Then she lifted the next one and did the same, and so on down the line until she was doing a repeating circuit of hoof shakes.
“Really?” Flash deadpanned. “Does that pass as dancing for you humans?”
“Hey, lay off!”
“Come on! Put some motion into your rump! Move your whole body!”
Skitch rolled her eyes but began to sway and shake a little more energetically, even tossing her head in rhythm to the music. A slight smile crossed Flash’s muzzle as he danced with her. They might all be backed into a corner by nobles because of her, but she didn’t seem like a bad mare...human...whatever. She was willing to fight for them at least.
Skitch began to dance a little faster now, closing her eyes and throwing herself into the music. She trotted back and forth, bobbing her head up and down. Flash matched her moves with his own...to the best of his ability at any rate. Skitch’s intoxicated state lead to a great deal of random twitches, half-bucks and shakes that it was hard to keep up with her.
“See? Not that hard.”
Ignoring his comment, she reared up on her hind legs, raising her forelegs above her head. Waving them back and forth, she began to twirl in place. Flash blinked, taking a half step backwards as he noticed something.
She was crying.
Tears leaked from the edges of her eyes as she tried to choke back sobs, but she danced all the harder and faster, whipping into a crazed series of thrashes as she continued to twirl. But she was off balance, and went crashing to the floor on her third twirl.
“Skitch? What was that?”
“I ‘unno,” She muttered, blinking through her tears. “I just...I ‘unno.”
And with another hiccup, she passed out.
Flash shook his head as Glittering sauntered her way over to the pair. The diamond dog tisked at the unconscious pony. “She’s fun to watch at any rate.”
“She’s staying at a hotel, and I have no idea which one it is.” Flash sighed.
“So? We take her back to our place,” Glittering shrugged. “You’ll both be heading back to the theatre in the morning anyway.”
“You want me to bring a strange mare into my apartment?”
Glittering opened her mouth to argue that point but then paused. “Yes.” She admitted with a shrug of her shoulders.
Flash rolled his eyes. “Fine. Can you help me with her?”
Glittering plucked Skitch off the floor, carefully draping her across Flash’s back. The unicorn muttered something in her sleep, clinging tightly to her carrier like a lifeboat. Flash sighed, but shook his head. “Come on, let’s go home.”
- - - -
Rarity’s pencil did a complicated little pirouette on the page, propelled both by her magic and a distinctly apathetic streak from the pony that was trying to control it. Sitting near one of the windows of their hotel room, Rarity scribbled designs with no enthusiasm.
The words that she had flung her father’s way echoed in her mind, suddenly feeling ashen in her mouth. Her father cared, she knew that; he just had an odd way of showing it. But somewhere, in his heart of hearts, he still wanted her to be a sports star, not a fashionista.
Perhaps it was a side effect of having a friend whose life had been so radically altered by outside forces, but Rarity found her mind wandering towards the realm of “what ifs” and “could have beens”. Her parents would have supported her transition. Of that, she was sure. It was just everything else that was playing out through her mind.
“And now, the center forward for the Canterlot Cavaliers, the ravishing rampage herself, Rarity!”
Rarity trotted out onto the pitch, the roar of the crowd echoing in her ears. Giving her perfectly coifed mane a casual toss, she casually sauntered over to center pitch, enjoying the fit of her custom sewn uniform-
No, she mentally sighed, pushing the daydream aside. It was foolish to think that if her life had gone that way, that she’d still be the same mare, just wrapped in a hoofball player’s skin. She would have been a different pony, with different tastes, likes and dreams. Returning to her mental wanderings, the dream corrected itself.
She rushed out onto the pitch with a wide, energetic grin. Mane and tail were shorter now, and straight, the former pulled back into a simple braid. Her uniform hugged her sleek, well toned, almost Rainbow Dash-esq figure. Sliding to a halt at center pitch, she paused to give the crowd an appreciative wave, before turning to face the opposing team’s center.
“I am going to destroy you darling!”
No, that wasn’t right either. Far too refined. How would Rainbow Dash say it?
“I am going to punt you from one end of this damn field to the other!”
Better.
The whistle blew and the ball arched through the air, propelled by a powerful kick from the referee. Rarity rushed forward, neatly using the side of her horn to stop the ball and drop it at her hooves.
She turned into a white blur, streaking across the field, slaloming between defenders. They whipped past her, nothing more than blurs of color as she drove towards the net. The crowd was cheering her on, the roar growing louder and louder as she prepared to score….
The door to the room slammed shut, Rarity jumping in her seat. Pinkie Pie trotted into the room, a pizza box clutched in her mouth. She placed it on one of the many tables in the room, before plopping down next to Rarity. Her presence reminded Rarity of the other thing that was bothering her.
“Did you find out where Skitch went, darling?”
“She bumped into Flashy and Glittering and they all went to a club.” The party pony chirped. “So I grabbed some dinner on the way back.”
“Are you sure that’s wise? Considering her mood….”
Pinkie smiled- a little sadly- but it was a smile all the same. “She needs some space. Maud, Marble and Limestone were like that growing up.”
Rarity frowned, glancing down at her collection of random doodles. “Pinkie...can I ask you something?”
“Always!” Pinkie beamed.
“When we first met after we became Twilight’s friends...did you recognize me? From our old home town?”
“Yuppers!” Pinkie beamed. “I mean...maybe not right away. But then it all just clicked in my head one day and I realized you were that little colt I saw running around Rocky Gulch!”
Rarity wistfully sighed the dusty streets of her old home playing through her mind. “Rocky Gulch...I still can’t believe they named the town that, even if it was a center of the rock farming community. Its just so...cliche!”
Pinkie giggled. “But there were a whole lot of rocks! And it was in a gulch!”
“It was in a small valley!” Rarity laughed. “That’s not the same thing as a gulch!”
Pinkie shrugged. “It’s totally kind of a gulchy thing! It’s a shape in the earth that’s kinda like a V. Gulch!” She tilted her head slightly, eyes narrowing at her fashionista friend. “But why bring it up? I mean, it’s all dusty and not...you.”
“My father and I...had words.” Rarity sighed. “Or, perhaps more accurately, I threw words his way.” Pinkie nodded, gently sliding the pizza box closer to Rarity with her nose while she kept talking. “It’s just...I do act...very feminine. I have stepped completely away from who I was, and some of the things I learned when I was a colt.”
“And your dad’s worried about that and thinks that something’s wrong?” Pinkie asked. "Had all these plans for you growing up?"
Rarity blinked. “Well...yes.” She frowned.
Pinkie nodded, the sad smile returning to her muzzle. “I guess I got lucky. When I left the farm to move to Ponyville, mom and dad still had my other sisters to run it.”
“Your father wanted you to keep running the farm?”
“Yuppers. Well...one of us at least. The rock farm...well, it’s the family business. Mom and dad worked hard to make it what it was. They want it to stay with us, instead of getting bought by some other rock farmer.”
Rarity sighed, flipping the pizza box open and helping herself to a slice loaded with veggies. It was warm, with just the right amount of crunch and salt. Pinkie made a good choice, it seemed. “I suppose,” She spoke up again, after dabbing at her muzzle with a napkin. “That I’m wondering if he’s at least...partially correct. I did completely change my life.”
“Rarity.” Pinkie smiled, resting her hooves on Rarity’s. “No matter what you want to do, or who you wanna be, you’ll be the best Rarity you can be! Nothing can change that, and if you’re happy, then I’ll be happy for you.”
Rarity blinked, then giggled, leaning forward to give Pinkie a hug. “Thank you Pinkie. Your confidence in me...well, it means a lot.”
“You’re my friend you silly filly!” She nodded, snatching up a slice of pizza for herself. “And I and Twilight and Rainbow and Skitchy and Fluttershy and Applejack and Spike will all support you! And you’ll support us. It’ll be a support of supportyness!”
“Quite right darling.” Rarity smiled, helping herself to another slice. “Which brings us to our current situation. There are still a good many ponies in the metaphorical line of fire if we can’t work out a way to deal with the issue of this production. Somepony was obviously impersonating her with the reporters.”
Pinkie nodded in agreement. “But if the musical is a success, then they’d look reeaaaalllyy silly.”
“True, darling, but that’s not going to happen with Princess Tyrantance, now is it?”
“No.” Pinkie admitted, glaring at the pizza box like it was somehow its fault. “It’s not. And the brother’s lied to us, so they’re probably in on that jerk’s plans!”
“There has to be some solution.” Rarity frowned, turning her attention back to her sketchbook and making another stab at doing some uniform designs.
“Well,” Pinkie frowned, tapping her chin. “Applejack probably wouldn’t like it, but we could always...well...lie.”
“Lie?”
“Yup!” She beamed, beginning to bounce in her seat. “We just do a different play! A better one! With happy songs and dashing heroes and romantic interests! Oooo! And battle scenes! We need battle scenes! They might not be happy, but at least we wouldn’t be hurting Cadance’s feelings like this.”
“That is a good point.” Rarity smiled “We’ll discuss it with Skitch tomorrow.”
- - - -
As they approached his apartment building, Flash shifted the weight that was Skitch-Sketch slightly, moving her off his wings. The unicorn murmured something unintelligible and wrapped her legs all the tighter around his neck.
“She’s got a bit of a grip on her, that’s for sure.” He muttered, nodding his head towards the building’s door. “Can you grab it for me Glittering?”
His friend nodded, pushing the door open with a paw. The two walked past the still broken elevator in the lobby and began the laborious climb to the top floor.
“You’d think that the landlord would have taken your offer to fix that thing.” Flash mused.
Green Acres Apartments wasn’t exactly one of the nicer buildings in Manehatten. In fact, under most circumstances, it would probably be considered a slum. The hot water was intermittent, the pipes sometimes burst, and it was drafty as the depths of Tartarus itself. But, rent was cheap and that fact lead to the population of students, artists and bachelors that called the building home.
Glittering shrugged. “He’s stubborn. Says that he’ll handle it himself.”
“Of course he will.” Flash rolled his eyes. “Just like he’d get it the last six times we brought it up.”
Reaching the floor that their apartment was on, they passed one of their neighbors, Blue Marsh. The light blue stallion raised an eyebrow at Flash and his cargo.
“Nice!” He grinned, as Glittering unlocked their apartment. “That’s a real catch there. I was starting to wonder-”
“Marsh, go soak your head.” Flash growled, slamming the door behind him. At least they were home now and they could rest for the night. He could give Skitch the bed, and he’d take the second hoof cou-
“Hurk!” The weight on his back suddenly convulsed. “BLARGH!”
Warmth flooded over the back of Flash’s head and neck, the pegasus freezing mid step. A moment later the distinct smell of sick filled his nostrils. “Sweet Celestia….” He shuddered, the warm rivulets of vomit soaking into his mane and coat, “please tell me that she didn’t just throw up on me!”
“You are my friend, and I shall lie to you if you wish.” Glittering smirked. “Perhaps a shower before bed would be in order?”
“Can you hold her then?”
Glittering nodded, gently grabbing Skitch’s unconscious form. But the unicorn latched onto her bearer, refusing to let go. Frowning, Glittering tugged a few times, only to find the unicorn’s grip to be quite strong.
“She has quite a grip for an unconscious pony.” Glittering sighed.
“You can’t break it?”
“I don’t want to be too rough with her. She did drink herself into this state.”
Flash rolled his eyes. “Forget it. I’ll just take her with me. She probably got it all over herself too.”
Trotting for the apartments cramped bathroom, he couldn’t help but roll his eyes. Some ponies never seemed to know their limits. Stepping into the low tub, he found himself suddenly struck with another dilemma. How to actually take a shower with another pony on his back.
Grunting, he gave his body a shake. Maybe if he could at least get her to move enough so that the water could reach the throw up-
Skitch’s whole body suddenly toppled to the right and off his back. The rapid shift of weight managed to catch Flash completely off guard, his hooves slipping on the polished porcelain. He toppled forward, landing ontop of the still somehow unconscious unicorn.
Finding their muzzles almost touching, Flash couldn’t help but stare as his mind grasped the situation he was now in. Skitch was underneath him now, her forelegs were still wrapped around his neck, the end result almost as if they were a dating couple. A flush crept into Flash’s cheeks as he found his gaze wandering towards Skitch’s soft lips as she muttered something unintelligible, her silky soft coat….
No! He shook his head, pushing the thoughts from his mind. Bad Flash! You barely know this mare. ...Does she even count as a mare? Some alien in a pony’s body? ...Sun above, this is confusing.
Slowly placing his hooves on either side of Skitch, he pushed himself upright again and reached for the tap. A cacophony of bangs and groans erupted from the pipes, the hot water right behind it. A happy sigh escaped Flash’s lips as the warmth flooded his body. There were few things as effective at removing the stress of the day as a hot shower in his mind. Turning his attention to his task, he was able to get them both cleaned off in short enough order.
Getting out of the tub turned out to be a little more tricky than getting in, what with an adult pony still clinging to him like a barnacle on a ship’s hull. Thankfully, with Skitch no longer hanging on his back, there was another option. A few flaps of his wings easily propelled them over the edge and- after fiddling with the towels a bit to get them both dry- down the short hall to his bedroom.
Flitting over to his bed, he threw back the covers with a hoof and carefully settled down with Skitch, laying down next to her. Of course, he was trapped now because she still had a death grip on his body.
“I have no idea why you won’t let go,” he mused, shaking his head slightly. “But I still need you to do that.”
Easier said than done, admittedly. His eyes scanned the room, searching for something that would help him escape from the grip of this mare. Spying his bed’s own pillows, an idea was stirred in the back of his mind. Holding one close to his muzzle, be began to inch backwards, sliding out of Skitch’s grip one bit at a time. A few times he almost got stuck when she tried to hug him a little closer with a whimper. But he finally managed to slip loose, Skitch-Sketch’s vice like embrace closing around the pillow. With a sigh, he rolled off the bed, starting to trot over to his closet to dig out some blankets.
“Flash?”
Skitch’s voice- surprisingly clear- cut through the room. Flash turned to face her, recoiling slightly at the anguished expression on her face. She had barely managed to push herself upright with a hoof, having emerged from her slumber.
“Please. Don’t leave me alone.”
And then she was gone again, collapsing back to the mattress. Flash felt his stomach doing a nervous dance at what she said. She wanted him to stay. He was quite sure that this would be a bad idea, all things considered. Mostly because he placed the odds of her remembering any of this between zero and none. Still….
With a sigh, he trotted back to bed, and layed down beside her. For a few moments, he didn’t move, just listening to the sound of his and Skitch’s breathing. As the weight of tiredness began to weigh him down, he reached out with a wing, draping it across the sleeping unicorn’s back. Skitch leaned into his wing hug. Perhaps consciously, perhaps unconsciously, Flash wasn’t entirely sure. But there was a small smile on her face as she slept. He smiled as well, closing his eyes and letting sleep carry him away.
- - - -
Pain was what Skitch awoke too. Pain and the burning rays of sunlight that attacked her eyes like the arrows from some vengeful god. The unicorn buried her head under her pillow, using it as a shield against the wrath of the tyrannical sun. The underside was cool, and the pillow itself was soft and fluffy as she snuggled it even closer to it.
“Wait….”
Opening her right eye- argh, fucking sunlight- and slowly looking around, she could see a mattress, fresh linen sheets, and a wide window overlooking the streets of Manehatten. Groaning, she switched eyes, only to gasp at the sight of the sleeping orange pegasus beside her. Dimly, her brain began to catch up with the rest of what she was feeling, and the situation she was in.
She was in bed. With a stallion. Who had his wing draped over her body. And they were both naked. And she had been drinking last night! AND he was smiling contently!
“Oh god, oh god, oh god!” She shouted, her heart hammering in her chest. “WHAT DID I DO?!”
Shouting had been a mistake. The words rang in her ears like a gong, and there was a horrible ache at the base of her horn that combined with the stabbing knives that was the hangover to form a whole new crescendo of pain. Shoving Flash’s wing off of her, she scrambled backwards from him as he awoke in a flurry of flailing limbs. Going over the edge of the bed with a yelp, she hit the floor with an even louder cry of agony.
“Gah! Stupid damn floor!” She moaned at the fresh fiery lances that sliced through her brain. This was becoming an annoying pattern.
“Skitch-Sketch?” Flash groggily asked, blinking the sleep out of his eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“You...you…” She stammered, pointing a shaky hoof at him. “You had your way with me!”
Flash’s jaw dropped for a moment, but then he sat bolt upright and came back, eyes blazing. “Are you kidding me? Did you just accuse me of what I think you did?!”
“I...I don’t know.” Skitch stammered, her heart dropping into the pit of her stomach. She had gotten drunk beyond reasoning again. “I...oh lord. I came onto you didn’t I? I came onto you and we had drunken sex!”
Another slack jawed stare from Flash said it all. “We did have sex! No, no, no!” She moaned, throwing her hooves across her eyes. “I haven’t even been a woman for a year yet and I already gave up my virginity to a random stallion at a bar!”
She could hear the sound of his hooves on the floor before her eyes were uncovered. Flash’s expression was almost the textbook definition of deadpan.
“Do I really have to explain in all the different ways those assumptions are wrong?”
“But...bed...sleeping...naked...and,” she winced. “Ponies are almost always naked so that doesn’t necessarily mean anything….”
“Uh huh.” Flash nodded. “For the record, you got insanely drunk, passed out, needed me to carry you back here- because we had no idea where your hotel was- at which point you threw up on me,” He paused, glaring down at Skitch. “Which was really appreciated.”
Skitch didn’t think that her ears could press any flatter against her skull as Flash kept up his tirade. “Then, once I finally manage to get you cleaned off and put you to bed, you suddenly wake up long enough to ask me not to leave! And now you accuse me of sleeping with you? Also, I am hardly ‘some random stallion at a bar’ thank you very much.”
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” She wailed, struggling to collect her wits through the haze of a morning hangover. “I just...I’ve never really had to worry about...sex and stuff.”
“Never?” Flash raised an eyebrow.
“Okay...well…” She groaned. “Look...can we have this discussion over coffee or something? This hangover is killing me.”
Withering under Flash’s glare, she found a spot on his mane to be rather suddenly fascinating. Eventually, the stallion sighed.
“Let’s get some coffee in you.” He declared, helping her up. “It’s hard to apologize through a hangover and we have a long day ahead of us. Okay?”
She looked up into his eyes, the vice like grip on her stomach releasing itself. “I’d like that.”
“Come on then.”
Head still throbbing, Skitch followed her host, hoping that she wouldn’t put her hoof in her mouth again.
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Even in alternate continuities, Flash Sentry still gets the shaft.
Flash Sentry will always get flack from Bronies. Always.
Heh.
This was a good chapter.
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5426790
Well, I didn't try to kill him like Silver Quill did in his analysis videos, so that's gotta count for something, isn't it?
5427533
Thanks Vol! Glad you enjoyed it!
Ha, this was cute. Also kind of sad, though.
I find Rarity's storyline so far to be really interesting, and that fantasy with athletic!Rarity has me wanting to make fanart, lol.
I wonder if Flash is wondering if humans, like, don't have señor something?
5428305
Yeah, Skitch's storyline is a bit on the sad side at times. The main thought in the back of my mind with her is that she clings to the Mane Six as a bit of an anchor to help keep her grounded. They're familiar and have been kind enough to extend friendship to her. She really needs them.
Glad that you like Trans!Rarity though. It's been kind of a fun challenge to explain her show personality within that context and having her sometimes question her own stance is fun.
5430620
Sorry White, but I'm having a little bit of trouble working out what you mean there.
Any chance you could run that by me again?
5431897 *sex or*, nor señor. Darn auto connect!
5431897
I think it'll be really interesting to see those plot lines develop. Looking forward to it.
5432222 fc07.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2011/264/e/d/pinkie_pie_is_ready_to_fiesta_by_nikkydash-d4ajff2.png
Si
The song remind this
I can't believe that I'm actually siding with the nobles on their fight against Riche even though what they're about to do sounds corrupt.
Should be capitalized