Artificial Love

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Trender is back in town and he wants to make amends with Applejack. Applejack is suspicious at first, but relents. They go to a bar along with the rest of the mane six and Spike to talk things out. Things go well until Spike catches Trender slipping a love potion into Applejack's drink. Soon after he proposes, and to everyone's surprise she accepts! Now it's up to Spike to stop the wedding and expose the truth!

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 11 )

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M4sterM1nd

M4sterM1nd #1 · Sep 13th, 2014 · · ·

Reminds me of the movie, Love potion number 9. Its a good movie

Dirty Bit

Dirty Bit #2 · Sep 13th, 2014 · · ·

I'm glad that you put my idea to good use. This was an entertaining read

TheNewYorkBrony

TheNewYorkBrony #3 · Sep 13th, 2014 · · ·

4994431 thank you! :D

RavenFire2908

RavenFire2908 #4 · Sep 13th, 2014 · · ·

I love this story....I dont know why I keep Reading it, and Reading, and Reading... why you so good

phallus of malice

phallus of malice #5 · Sep 14th, 2014 · · ·

JESUS TITTY FUCKIN CHRIST!!
Do you see those legs?!
They look like a nutcracker for whale skulls!
They seem to appear as though they could eat a human being and ask for seconds and a dessert!
By Gandalfs glowing nutsack, if a man has the sheer willpower to look their way and not cringe at their ungodly crushing powers then he is by order of natural selection the alpha of humanity her subsidies.

RavenFire2908

RavenFire2908 #6 · Sep 21st, 2014 · · ·

I would love if... Spike comes in right before they kiss. like when they say 'speak now or...(whatever)' Spike comes in and give the truth. that would make it a little more epic.... not that I dont think its a good story, I just think maybe it was a little rushed but I love it just that I would love like a last minute save. but I LOVE it

Half Dime

Half Dime #7 · Sep 24th, 2014 · · ·

This was a really fun story, but that ending moved awfully fast. Toward the beginning, you did a great job keeping the story apace, and I really enjoyed exploring the character's dynamics and relationships. Even outside the exposition and the dialogue, you kept my interest by adding visual details like "drumming his fingers on the table" and "swerved around in his seat and made a gagging sound". You really made the characters come alive through their actions, and it was easy for me, as the reader to get totally and completely immersed in this piece.

I can't say the same thing about the ending, though. At the end, you seemed to jump from point a (no one believing Spike) to point b (“He’s {Spike's} a teenager! What does he know!” . . . “A lot, considering he outsmarted you!”) to point c (“Thank you, Spike for saving me back there,” Applejack said after she had chased Trender all the way out of Ponyville) awfully quickly. I could still follow along with the story, but the way the pace suddenly quickened, the way the characters suddenly weren't interacting physically, the suspension of disbelief took a hit. And considering this was all happening toward the climax of the story . . .

But I digress, this really was a good piece. It was very well written and I had a lot of fun reading it. . . . You have something here. Something that, with a bit more polishing, could be phenomenal.

RavenFire2908

RavenFire2908 #8 · Oct 1st, 2014 · · ·

can you make an alternate verson to. were Trenderhoof win.... I dont know how many would like that, but it sound a little fun

Swashbucklist

Swashbucklist #9 · Aug 25th, 2015 · · ·

She answered him, getting up to flip through one of the books that lined her hut. She pointed to a page in the book that had a picture of a bottle that looked exactly like the one Trender had they day before.

The bottle is the identifier? Not the color of the liquid? So what you're describing here is a mass-produced item that has been distributed in the exact same bottle longer than the book Zecora's referring to has been in print. In other words, said book is a catalog. And nobody's gone to the authorities with this?

“I’m sorry, Spike, I should have believed you when you first told me.”
The others nodded in agreement.
“It doesn’t matter now!” Trender shouted, disturbing the happy moment. “Because once I kiss Applejack, she’ll be mine forever!” He said, laughing maniacally.

And this where we wave goodbye to every trace of drama or tension that could have existed in this story. If the heavily manufactured Spikelove didn't kill it, Trender's laugh (and his idiotic belief that he can make off with Applejack while surrounded by her friends) sure did. Why am I reading this?

Applejack said after she had chased Trender all the way out of Ponyville.

And she did it without a page break, too! Talk about fast. Tragically anticlimactic, though, considering the crime he nearly committed really warrants a prison sentence.

MonBom