Blue is a time-traveling, interdimensional jumping pony that fights for what he believes is right.
Blade Runner is a former assassin to Discord that was trained to fight without any mercy.
This is the story of how those two met, for what seemed like love at first sight.
Based off of Black Gryph0n and Bassik's song: Tell Me. I like this song of theirs, right next to Another End, the best, and it inspired a bit of a romance story out of me.
Cover art was made by THIS friend of a great friend. Go check out all her work because it's all awesome!
Chapters (1)
Is this a Self-insert?
All of this is completely unnecessary. The Author's Note assumes the readers are stupid, which while probably true in a lot of cases, is really offensive to me. Second, everyone already knows that this is Tell Me by Ephraim Blue, and "Whatcha Gonna Do When They Come For You". You don't need to repeat it.
5027545 Okay, first of all, the author's note is not saying that the readers are stupid. I put that there for clarification. If the POV just changed randomly, and you didn't know what was happening, would you be confused?
And second, I put that *Story Title* By: Ephraim Blue *Chapter Title* in every single story of mine. It's like a little thing I do; a habit. Yes, it is unnecessary, but I put it in anyway.
I'm sorry if you found some things unnecessary, but that's what I put in for clarification.
Not bad. I'll give you an upvote, as there was nothing that made me want to punch a wall, but there are a few things that I'd suggest.
One thing that I noticed was that you could have used show over tell in a few instances. Showing works great when dealing with emotions or the setting, so applying show in those instances can make the story livelier. Of course, telling is also acceptable, just try to not overdo it.
Secondly, I have a hard time believing that Discord would have had assassins working for him, so either changing Blade Runner's past or using a different character instead of Discord will make her background more believable in the universe of MLP.
Lastly, I did notice a few typos here and there, but they don't detract from the story that much. Having someone to help look over your work is a great way to catch those pesky typos.
Anyway, I must say you have a lot of potential as a writer, so keep on writing and practicing and I know you'll improve with experience. I hope some of my advice helped.
5027693
It doesn't say readers are stupid, it assumes they don't know what a break is. There are literally millions of stories on the planet that do that, so pretty much everyone who has ever seen a story should realize what happened. There's a reason that line is a built in feature on FIMfiction: most people use it to show scene changes (yes, that includes perspective changes). If you can't figure out that the perspective changed, you're either stupid or the writer is bad at conveying perspective change.
Hmm.... Interesting story. I think it's safe to say that I'm most intrigued. Oh screw it, I'm hooked!