• Member Since 21st May, 2012
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I read. I write. I edit. I Twidash. But above all else, I'm just a regular guy. Shoot me a PM if you have a question.


This story is a sequel to Cheated Dreams

Six months after the debacle with the Wonderbolts, Rainbow Dash comes home from another tour with her flight squad in time for her marefiend's birthday.

However, Twilight gets more than just presents for her birthday, and the return of a problem they thought solved long ago is heralded by a mysterious package left on Twilight's doorstep.

Reading of Cheated Dreams is required for you to understand anything in this story. Teen rating is for implied sex and some more mature themes, especially down the line.

New cover art generously provided by Angelic Flight over on DA. Go check her stuff out!

Chapters (7)
Comments ( 81 )

MMMMM b efore reading you have me itrigued

I will track this and follow its progress. But that scene with Pinkie....half of me is confused, and the other half has this comment:


...though I guess that's standard Pinkie Reacation #5?

But I remain curious as to where this will go and what you will do with this. :twilightsmile::rainbowlaugh:
In the words of the Spy - Proceed!

Is it an enchanted orb, the same type in which twilight used to hold the aura of other unicorns?

Hmmmm, starts with S, and made Twilight break into a bunch of shards....Sombra?

4942056 Sadly from what I saw in the tags it's actually gonna be an OC.

True, but then again, if he tagged Sombra, there would be literally no point to trying to hide the villain's identity from the reader

4942226 Hm.... interesting proposition.

Nope, not Sombra nor an OC! It's not uncommon for authors to avoid tagging their villain until the chapter when the villain is actually introduced to their story to avoid spoilers, and it doesn't technically break site rules.

I was debating back and forth about keeping that scene. It almost kinda sorta fits with the light and fluffy tone of this chapter, with an added bit of curiosity about what she's talking about. On the other hand, this story will not have a similar tone until the very end. I've decided to keep it for now because it cracks me up, and unless a large number of people actively dislike it, it'll stay.

Bingo, have... a... err... I said bonus points in the A/N right? Have.... er... 7.235 bonus points! Redeemable at your nearest... store.... for... coupons?

before anyone else notices:

“As much as I want to agree, it's not exactly fare to the rest of the girls. We do have two weeks.”

When Rainbow caught site of her face she dropped the items on her wings, rushing over to the unicorn.

That thing wasn't cheep ya

Other than that, I get bonus points! Haha!

Dammit, Kod, ya got me all emotionally invested in a story that won't update for weeks! (And, before you say anything, shaddup. :rainbowlaugh:)

There were a few homonym errors, but on the while, she's good. I can't wait to see what happens next.

Hey, I'll have you know I got almost two thousand words done on the next chapter last night alone! This is probably going to update faster than Cheated Dreams did, and that was for a contest.

HOLY CRAP!!! Just finished the previous story and started this one...I AM MASSIVELY IMPRESSED!!! That said, I now am chomping the bit to see how this is going to go, and wondering who is behind all of this. Gilda Maybe? IN some iterations, she has powerful connections back in the Griffin's homeland. Lightning Dust? Then again, don't know if she had the connections to pull this off either. Some other third pony Rainbow's tangled with that I can't remember because it's late at night? ...In the immortal words of Mr Tourge..."MAYBE!?!?!?"

4945573 :pinkiehappy: Glad to hear it! I favorited this one basically on principle because of the last one in this series. It's a little bit late in the evening right now, but I'll be sure to read it soon. :moustache: I'll be watching! Put this one on hiatus and Twilight will give you that sickly sweet "I will break you" smile. :twilightsmile: Lol, I loved that when she was confronting that unicorn from the original.

4945573 It's funny, I just discovered Cheated Dreams a few days ago. I've read a few of your TwiDash stories before and loved them. Followed the author link and just browsed til one caught my fancy. Glad I picked that one! :trollestia:

Damn. Can't wait to see how this one turns out. I was a little wary at the tags (not the Adventure one), but hey, as long as Tragedy isn't included there's a good chance I wont have to be reading about character death.

Pinkie's scene... I think it would have worked better without the blatant fourth-wall breaking. Keep the combo in the Pinkie Sense, and basically have her be almost hysterically inconsolable, not wanting the girls to leave because she's got such an awful feeling. Other than that, there's a few minor errors ('peak' should be 'peek', 'cheep' should be 'cheap', etc).

I can't wait to see where you take this!

I can't wait to read the next chapters!
I loved cheated dreams (even if I forgot to say it...I necer wrote a comment or did I?) and This one startet really good!

This looks pretty good, and Twilight breaking into shards was entirely unexpected, but not in a bad way.

And, I'm sorry for being this blunt but... Pinkie's Fourth Wall breaking scene made me want to slam my face into my desk. It was jarring, broke story immersion and basically added nothing of value whatsoever. My recommendation is that you edit it out. That sort of Fourth Wall destruction is best used in silly crackfics, not a serious story.

Basically what this guy said.

Pinkie's scene... I think it would have worked better without the blatant fourth-wall breaking. Keep the combo in the Pinkie Sense, and basically have her be almost hysterically inconsolable, not wanting the girls to leave because she's got such an awful feeling. Other than that, there's a few minor errors ('peak' should be 'peek', 'cheep' should be 'cheap', etc).

Stupid Celsetia. This is Twilight friggin' Sparkle we're talking about here, she actually can't die! Well, that's more because the author would get lynched, but it's a rule nevertheless! You'd think she could be a little more sympathetic, though. I know death holds little consequence to an immortal, but still.

... Celestia is supposed to be an amazing wizard; she taught Twilight!

So why is she insistent that Twilight is dead if a moderately skilled enchanter can provide an alternative explanation that meshes with the inconsistency of Rainbows description of the spell?

Either Shadow Charm is lying and this is part of a plan, or Celestia is being pessimistic way too quickly.

Ha, I was waiting for this comment! This is explained in... probably next chapter, actually. I've planned out how this entire thing happened, and I've been very careful this time around with plot holes.

5014005 I'm kind of on the same page. I will be watching closely for that to get wrapped up. Twilight apparently recognized the spell fast enough to ask Rainbow to find her, but Celestia missed something. Perhaps if she hears it from Shadow Charm she will realize her mistake, but that doesn't explain the mistake in the first place. Very puzzling. :trixieshiftright: She did say that she hasn't sent this spell since Discord was in charge, one of the last recorded times that she was an Element weirder. If the spell has been modified or changed in any way during that period of time, she might not spot it. That fits my head-canon of voodoo and hoodoo being newer in this world than unicorn magic and the princesses knowing little to nothing about it... but I digress... :scootangel:
Tldr: I'm watching you, Kodeake. :duck:

The end was pretty good, it actually sounded like a commercial break was about to happen XD

I'm a bit curious now, who is older? Shadow charm or his sister?

And I must say that I kinda understand Celestia. I think one or more of her students died in such a way and she knows already how it is get her hopes crushed after denying it that the student is dead:(

I never even thought about their ages.... holy crap I'm dropping the ball. Er... I guess... Neon's older? Only slightly though; less than two years. I may need to work that into the story somewhere....

5018309 Those are some little things I just randomly ask myself:twilightblush:
And I look forward to more informations about Shadow and Neon.

I did like Shadow Charm. He seemed like a nice fellow, even if he did have all the spine of an amoeba.

Though I do think Celly is being a bit silly in spending a whole 5 seconds looking at the scene. Given all the shenanigans you can pull off with magic, alchemy or any of the incredibly powerful items they just leave laying about like morons, ya'd think she'd want to make absolutely certain.

5018309 I personally think it would make Neon's dominating personality, as well as Shadow's lack of a backbone, more emphasized if Neon was the younger sister, commanding her older brother, bending him to her will.

When the eldest is the dominate one, they just look like an older sibling setting the rules. When it's the younger who is the dominate one, they look much more malicious and powerful. At least to me, they do.

Please, please, please update the next chapter. This story is to epic to postpone.

Please update this I don't think my heart will enjoy going to long without knowing what happens.

I wonder what they were arguing about...could it have been about Twilight's sexaulity? Shining didn't seem surprised when Rainbow admitted they are marefriends as he could have been...


very well written
i very much enjoy this story

Never mind; it' fine

It's fine

There was something else, I swear, but I can't seem to find it. I remember a semicolon used in place of an apostrophe. Must not have been that important.

That scene with Shining...that was by far my favorite scene so far, in all of the chapters. It was so powerful, so emotional. I wanted to cry alongside Shining, yell in defiance with Rainbow, and help Spike try to comfort both of them and bring them answers, even whilst needing answers himself.

Awww. I was hoping Shadow would get a pardon out of this. I like him.

Ponyville; Ill meet you back at the library.”


“Alas, it it is time I depart

extra it

Great chapter! The dialog between Celestia and Rainbow was nicely handled and it's nice to see Shadow Charm get some redeeming light. Here's hopin' for him to get a few years knocked off that sentence for helping get their investigation off the ground! Can't wait for the next one!

Edit - Real quick, need to point this out.

“She's alive!” Rainbow cried, holding her necklace close to her chest. “I'm comin' for ya, Twi.” she whispered. “Just a little longer; I'll be there soon.”

Joining in on the editing front:

...her eyes closed and a smile stretched wide across her muzzle ass she breathed deeply.

Double 's'

Comment posted by Archangel of the Silent deleted Nov 24th, 2014

Finding the teleport should be fairly easy. Just find the one that leads out of Ponyville from the spot where Twilight was standing.

Hands up everyone who expected Rainbow to do the stupid thing. *raises hand*
Hands up everyone who expects her to keep being stupid *raises other hand*

Though I'm sad that Shadow Charm left. I was shipping him with Fluttershy :fluttercry:

It's Lightning Dust. Or her folks. That's my guess.

in a layer of magic, witch they

This was the one I saw early on, and now I've lost the other ones.

It wouldn't be Rainbow if she didn't do something stupid every now and then.

And... Shadow Charm x Fluttershy?... ShadowShy? FlutterCharm?

This doesn't even make sense.

If they really did simply want her to suffer killing/crippling Twilight is the easiest way. They could have just used that spell instead of faking it.

But the wonderbolt thing is nonsensical. Quitting involves talking to them in private, it's impossible to know if she tells them the truth and asks for some fake theatrics, assuming she even needs to buy time. Unless they're scrying on her somehow the threat of surveillance is a pretty crappy bluff. Considering how important their hostage is, I see little way any damage done to Rainbow's career can't be smoothed over by Celestia after the fact.

On the face, their plan is idiocy. I'm thinking this must be cover for something else.

People like you is what makes writing this story so much fun. Watching as theories evolve in the comments as more and more information is slowly revealed. Especially since, unlike the first one, I actually know where I'm going with this.


Shadowshy, by a mile. They'd have a wonderful mutual co-dependence! And the babies would be adorable.

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