• Published 1st Sep 2014
  • 5,143 Views, 692 Comments

Let's Get Boyfriends! - MythrilMoth



Pinkie Pie comes up with another game to play with her friends. This time, the challenge is to get boyfriends or die trying.

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Chapter 1: Mission Start!

Fluttershy followed Applejack back to Sweet Apple Acres once the group split up for the day. "Umm, Applejack?"

"Yeah?"

"How...I mean...what..." Fluttershy paused, eyes full of nervous worry. "I don't know how to break the ice with Big Mac," she said. "I don't really know...what we have in common...or what he might like..."

Applejack hummed thoughtfully. "Well, you know y'all got music in common," she said. "Ah mean, that whole business with the Ponytones..."

"Of course!" Fluttershy said brightly, fluttering her wings. "I love music, Big Macintosh loves music...why didn't I think of that right away?"

Applejack chuckled. "Heheh...yeah. Best advice Ah can give is use music t' break th' ice."

"Oh, thank you, Applejack!" Fluttershy soared up above the treetops, slowly flying over Sweet Apple Acres, scanning for any sign of Big Macintosh. She saw him hauling a wagonload of tools out to the barn and glided down beside him. "Umm...Big Mac?"

Big Mac turned to look at her, mildly surprised. "Eeyup?"

Fluttershy cleared her throat and began singing.

Do you wanna be my boyfriend?
I like my stallions big and strong
I'm hoping maybe that we could go out
And then you'd think about
How well we'd get along!
Oh gentle stallion won't you tell me
You'll give dating me a try?
Do you wanna be my boyfriend?
I'd like for you to be my boyfriend.

Big Macintosh stared at her, jaw agape. He flicked his right ear.

"Eenope."

Okay. ...'bye...

Fluttershy flew away sadly.

Several yards away, Applejack facehoofed. She trotted over to the dejected Fluttershy. "Don't give up so easy now," she said. "Big Mac's stubborn and shy. Keep at it, girl!"

An hour later, Big Mac was mending the fence when...

Do you wanna be my boyfriend?
And go on dates and sit and talk?
It's Spring and I could really use a guy
To sit and snuggle by
Or take a long and peaceful walk
I really want to have somepony
Somepony to call my own...

Fluttershy trailed off, realizing Big Mac was hammering nails into fenceboard. She frowned.

Big Mac, I'm going to make you love me!
Put down that hammer and look here
I'm trying to tell you that I want you to
Be somepony who will hold my feelings dear
I want us to be together
Why won't you just give in?
Do you wanna be my boyfriend?
Just say you'll be my stupid boyfriend!

Big Mac dropped his hammer, looked up at Fluttershy, and sighed. "Okay, enough already," he said. "Ah don't know what's gotten into you, but Ah'll go out with you. Just...don't get all crazy on me."

Fluttershy beamed, swooped down, and hugged Big Mac. "Come out to my place this evening," she said. "I'll make us a special picnic and we can watch the sun go down."

"That sounds nice."

* * * * *

Rarity paced nervously in her boutique.

Why, of any male in Equestria, did it have to be Spike?

She adored Spike, of course. There was no question of that. Had he been a pony, and slightly older, why...but she valued Spike as a dear friend. Despite his devotion to her, despite his adorable little crush...she just didn't see him that way.

However, knowing Pinkie, there would be no squirming out of this ridiculous game without reprisals. She had to make an earnest effort to woo Spike.

On the plus side, Spike would be easily wooed. On the minus side, unwooing him would be next to impossible, and Rarity had no intention of hurting him.

Sweetie Belle wandered past out of the corner of her eye. She said something...Rarity wasn't sure what...and then wandered out of view again, presumably off to play with her little friends.

Rarity stopped in her tracks, eyes wide. "I-DEEEE-AAAA!"

Just as a plan began to form in her mind, the bell over the boutique's front door jingled. "Rarity?" she heard Spike call. "Twilight said you wanted to see me?"

Rarity whirled, a bright, sunny smile on her face. "Why YES, Spikey-boo!" she said. "I was just wondering if you're busy this evening..."

* * * * *

The biggest obstacle Applejack faced in approaching Thunderlane was that he lived up in the air. After Fluttershy successfully secured a date with Big Macintosh, she agreed to find Thunderlane and send him down to the ground.

Applejack decided to calm her nerves with some baking. She had just finished a batch of apple brown betties and set them out to cool when a grey face poked through the kitchen window. "Hey Applejack," Thunderlane said. "Fluttershy said you wanted to see me?"

"Oh, hey Thunderlane," Applejack said. "C'mon in, sit a spell. Got some fresh apple brown betties."

"Oh, sweet!" Thunderlane said. He disappeared from the window; a moment later, he walked in through the back door, taking a seat at the worn old kitchen table.

Applejack placed a plate of betties on the table. "Careful, they're hot," she said as she helped herself to one. Thunderlane did the same. "So uh," Applejack began, "Ah ain't no good at this, but...dang it all," she muttered, "Ah'm lookin' fer a stallion, an'—"

Thunderlane blinked at her. "You're asking me out?"

"Well...yeah," Applejack said, ducking her head.

"Why me?" Thunderlane asked curiously.

Applejack shrugged. "Why not?"

Thunderlane sighed. "I dunno," he said. "First of all, I barely even know you. Secondly, I just broke up with Cloudchaser..."

"Oh. Ah...didn't know that." Applejack sighed. "So...you ain't interested?"

Thunderlane tilted his head. "I'm flattered. And surprised." He flicked an ear. "I guess going out couldn't hurt. But let's go someplace simple, okay? Where we can just talk and have a good time."

"That sounds good t' me," Applejack said.

"How about Hay Burger?" Thunderlane suggested.

"Sure," Applejack agreed. "Tonight?"

"Actually, tomorrow would be better," Thunderlane said. "I sorta meant to spend some time with my kid brother today."

Applejack grinned. "Ah totally understand," she said.

* * * * *

Rainbow Dash landed on the floating cloud island that comprised the Wonderbolts training camp and administrative facilities. Several pegasi in the vicinity recognized her and greeted her; she waved back distractedly, heading for the building containing the offices of the Wonderbolts.

"Rainbow Dash!" a voice called. She turned and saw Spitfire, wearing her training suit and goggles, trotting briskly across the blacktop.

Rainbow saluted. "Ma'am!"

Spitfire laughed. "At ease," she said. "What's up?"

Rainbow rubbed the back of her neck with a hoof. "Aheh...actually, I was lookin' for Soarin...thought I'd check around here first."

"Soarin, huh?" Spitfire echoed, tapping her muzzle with a hoof. "He's got a couple days off this week...knowing him, he's probably spending them at home." She rolled her eyes. "He's the laziest pony I know."

"Really?" Rainbow asked. "I didn't think any Wonderbolt could be lazy..."

Spitfire chuckled. "Hey, we're just like any other pony. So, what did you want with Soarin?"

Rainbow laughed sheepishly, trying and failing to fight a blush as she looked down. "Well, uhh...that's...I mean..."

Spitfire raised an eyebrow. "You want to ask him out, don't you?"

Rainbow nodded, face flaming.

Spitfire smirked. "Good luck," she said. "He's completely clueless. I'm not even sure he knows the difference between a mare and a stallion."

Rainbow's ears wilted. "Great," she muttered.

"Here, I'll give you his address..."

An hour later, Rainbow was standing in front of a small cloud house on the edge of Cloudsdale. There were no frills, no columns...it was a two-story structure that was, by pegasus standards, completely unremarkable. "Huh," she muttered. She flew up to the door and knocked.

The door opened to reveal a sleepy-eyed Soarin. His mane was completely bedraggled and he had what Rainbow Dash assumed to be crusty, dried-up pie filling stains on his coat. Soarin blinked at her. "Uhh....hey, Rainbow Dash."

"Hey Soarin," Rainbow said. "You're not, uh...busy are you?"

"Not really," Soarin said. "I'm just chillin'. Oh, uh...wanna come in?"

Rainbow trotted in and looked around. She'd never actually seen a bachelor pad before, but she decided Soarin's house was probably the archetype of one. His flight suit hung rumpled over the back of the sofa, a number of empty pie tins lay scattered around, and magazines were strewn all over the floor. *Holy CRAP,* Rainbow thought.

"Uhh...sorry 'bout the mess," Soarin said. "I kinda let things go when I'm on vacation."

"It's...it's cool," Rainbow said.

"So what brings you by?" Soarin asked.

"Oh, uh..." Rainbow shook herself, then turned to face Soarin. "I uh...came by to ask you out. You know, on a date."

Soarin blinked. "A...date?"

"Yeah," Rainbow said, ducking her head. "You know...you, me, goin' someplace cool, gettin' to know each other..."

"Wow. Um. Wow," Soarin said. "I...sure?" he hazarded uncertainly.

"Great!" Rainbow said. "Get cleaned up and meet me outside the palace in Ponyville at around sunset. I know a great night spot."

"Okay," Soarin said. "I'll be there."

As Rainbow left, Soarin sat down, blinking repeatedly. "I have a date?"

* * * * *

Twilight had spent the remainder of the day making arrangements and packing, anticipating a lengthy stay in the Crystal Empire. Although she wasn't looking forward to courting the Flash Sentry who was so unlike the boy she'd danced with at the Fall Formal, she was looking forward to spending some time with her brother and Cadance, even if the visit was sudden and unannounced.

Morning saw Twilight, luggage in tow, standing on the platform at the train station. Her presence drew a bit of commotion, as she was wearing her crown and some of her regalia—namely, the gold shoes with her cutie mark on them.

The long train ride to the Crystal Empire was comfortable, as she had been given an entire car to herself. She spent the majority of the trip reading.

Once the train arrived in the Crystal Empire, she disembarked and retrieved her luggage. Her sudden appearance on the platform drew murmurs of surprise and intrigue. It amused and delighted her that for all the attention she herself drew as a princess, there was just as much commotion from crystal ponies hoping to catch a glimpse of Spike; she felt a touch of regret that she'd have to disappoint them. "Hello, my little ponies," she addressed the crowd. "I'm sorry, but Spike isn't with me this time. He's needed back in Ponyville."

There were disappointed moans and sighs from the crystal ponies, but they still welcomed Twilight openly; a line of crystal ponies queued up to form an honor guard, parading her up the thoroughfare to the Crystal Palace. The commotion drew attention from the guards, who met them a good dozen yards from the gates. When they saw who was approaching, they sent a page to alert Cadance and Shining Armor, and offered to carry her luggage.

Within minutes, Twilight stood inside the cavernous rotunda of the palace, and Cadance swooped down upon her, sweeping her up in a hug. "Twilight!" she exclaimed. "It's so good to see you! I wasn't expecting you!"

"I wasn't expecting me either," Twilight said with a giggle as she returned her sister-in-law's embrace. "How are you?"

"Oh, I'm fine," Cadance said. She studied Twilight. "You've gotten taller since the last time I saw you," she accused.

Twilight laughed self-consciously. "Ever since I got my castle, I've started growing a little bit every week," she said. "Rarity calls it 'alicorn puberty'," she added with a blush.

Cadance giggled. "She's pretty much dead on," she said. "Come on up, I'm sure Shining Armor will be happy to see his 'little' sister."

Cadance gave a page orders to prepare rooms for Twilight and to take her luggage, then escorted Twilight to the royal suite she shared with Shining Armor. "So, what brings you to the Crystal Empire?" Cadance asked.

"Oh, well...just visiting..." Twilight said.

Cadance suddenly stopped, turned, and tilted her head, appraising Twilight. A knowing smirk crossed her face. "You're here to see Flash Sentry," she said.

"What?! No, I—"

"Don't even try it, Twilight," Cadance said, waving her off with a hoof. "Or did you forget what my special talent is?"

Twilight ducked her head sheepishly. "Alright, that's exactly why I'm here."

Cadance giggled. "I thought you decided you didn't have any chemistry with Flash?"

"Well...I've...just decided to give him another chance," Twilight said awkwardly.

Cadance smiled. "I'm glad to hear it," she said. "I'll help out any way I can. Although I doubt I'll have to do anything." She poked Twilight in the chest with a hoof. "It's not like any stallion is going to say no to a princess."

Twilight rolled her eyes.

When they reached the royal suite, Shining Armor looked up in surprise. "Twiley!" he shouted, galloping full-force and tackling his sister. "It's so good to see you, little sis!" Ordinarily, a tackle from Shining Armor would pin Twilight and send them both tumbling plot-over-muzzle. Instead, Shining collided with Twilight as though she were a stone wall and fell to the floor with a strained grunt.

"She's not so little anymore," Cadance said with a giggle.

"Are you okay, BBBFF?" Twilight asked, eyes wide with alarm.

Shining grunted and pushed himself to his hooves. "Ugh...you've gotten...solid..."

"Sorry," Twilight said sheepishly.

"You'd better not do that to Flash Sentry," Cadance said with a sly smirk. "There's nothing a stallion hates worse than having his pride hurt."

Shining blinked. "Wait, what?"

"Twilight's here to make hay with a certain pegasus..."

* * * * *

Pinkie Pie found Cheese Sandwich in Dodge Junction, critically examining a banner for the town's Cherry Jamboree. "Heya Cheesie!"

Cheese turned around and hopped in place, a broad smile on his face. "Hi Pinkie!"

"Wanna be my boyfriend?" Pinkie asked.

"Boy, do I!" Cheese said, grinning.

"Awesome!" Pinkie looked around. "Need any help?"

"Heh, you know it!" Cheese said.

"Let's make some chimicherrychangas!"

Author's Note:

From this point forward, each chapter will consist of one scene for each mare/couple.