• Member Since 16th Jun, 2013
  • offline last seen Mar 24th, 2019

Shane1108


Originally from Spokane, Washington I am a writer and musician who is working as an English teacher in Guangzhou, China.

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Some ponies only know about Vinyl and Octavia through their reputation as the owners of the fairly large downtown club "The Hop!". Others though know what they really do. They take care of ponies who become troublesome to Vinyl's aunt Sunset Shimmer as well as sell a bit more than alcohol to the ponies in their club. They don't mind though. Octavia likes the bits and Vinyl loves helping out family (and loves the power she gets from violence even more).

After a few years things have become routine for them. Until one contract from Sunset starts a chain reaction that threatens to destroy the lives of every pony involved with the operation.

Chapters (15)
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Comments ( 32 )

Was... This inspired by one of my ideas on my adoption blog?

4931312

This story came from a friend and I streaming gangster movies (Goodfellas, Casino, Pulp Fiction and a couple others) and talking about how cool it would be to make a Tumblr blog about ponies who did hits. Her other blogs are based around Vinyl and Octavia so we decided to use them. I wrote up a basic story in 3 acts and a treatment for all the characters and the arc's they go through and she started working on the art. This was all about 2 months ago or so. Unfortunately she also runs 3 other blogs and is a full time college student so we've kind of had to postpone the blog for a bit, the only actual art we have completed is the Vinyl design that is used for the picture. So I decided that I wanted to write out the entire story (as I've been without internet the last week and have been super bored).

You know, I had questioned my friend theblondeknight on how Vinyl and Octavia got to be assassins in one of his fics he did a few weeks ago. Now I know.

4931332
Okay, cause I have this adoption blog series on the site where I post my Ideas and people adopt them. I had one called Background Killers where Octavia and Vinyl are best friends but work for an agency where they are assassins. They then get orders to kill each other but decide to fake their deaths and set up their own agency and gain allies in the form of background ponies who are all skilled killers

4931340 That's a pretty cool idea for a story, I like the idea of them faking their deaths. One of the biggest reasons I'm glad to be writing this story out instead of just having the blog is to focus on the expanded cast a lot instead of just Vinyl and Tavi. I have a lot planned for quite a few character's who will play a pretty major role in the story. I've never done fanfiction before and I'm really enjoying it so far, I'm not sure how good I am at it but I'm having fun.

4931350
If you want to borrow the idea of them faking their deaths go ahead

4931354 Thanks, but I already have the whole thing essentially planned out with a much more tragic ending in mind for the story. I appreciate it either way though. (also as a side note I really enjoy your stories, they are great)

Good start to this, only complaint I really have, and it might seem stupid, is that the correct translation for "The Unknown Horse" in Italian is "Il Cavallo Sconosciuto".Keep up the good work. :pinkiehappy:

4963721 Thanks for that. Fixed now. I don't speak Italian I just needed a decent mafia type name and that was the best that I could come up with. I'm glad you liked it and thanks for reading :twilightsmile:

they tried to manage their budding new drug empire

I'm loving the story so far, but isn't saying budding and new a bit redundant?

5022030 I tried to make it as intense as I could without getting too gory or over the top. I think it ended up coming out okay. Thanks for reading btw :twilightsmile:

5025876 np, I just hope what I think happened didnt actually happen. Cliff hangers why must you torture me.

You typoed "you're" as "your" several times in the last section.

I am think that it is a bad idea to summarize all that character development in the last few paragraphs. I understand that it's a difficult thing not to do what attempting to time skip past a lot of boring waiting, but the development is too important to be summarized.

Also some typos:
"We wouldn’t want you to open up and stitches." Should be "any".
"but that it would takes months to recover" should be "take".

I have the feeling Octavia is gonna murder Rose in cold blood.
(Sorta hoping she murders rose in cold blood)
:trixieshiftright:

Finally and update! :D
Ive been waiting ages for this to continue.

6386137 Sorry for the wait! Like I said, life has a funny way of putting things on hold. Also China has a funny way of blocking all of the best websites. It's a real pain in the ass. But I'm back now and I'm going to try and update the story at least once a week.

Is "Hitmares" ending with the next one?

6696090 Nope. Just the first act. The plan is for the story to take place in three acts all separated by a time gap. Basically after the next chapter there will be two small chapters (one focusing more on Sheen's backstory and one on the stuff that happens throughout the summer) then the story will pick up again around six months later and go from there. Think of it like a TV show with each act being a season.

6696437 Maybe a week or two at most. I'm in the process of writing an actual book about a fictionalized version of the life of my father that I am trying to finish to get it published so after I finish the next chapter I'm going to take a couple of weeks off and work on my book before coming back. I already have the basic details of all three acts of Hitmares written out so all I need to do is fill in the rest. Within a couple of weeks the story will return. Also like I said there are going to be a couple of short chapters in between to fill in the time gaps between the two acts.

Love it:heart: I've enjoys reading this so much!

6738082 Thanks for reading. I'm working on the next chapter now and even though the story hasn't gotten as many views as I would have hoped I still really appreciate every reader I get. I just finished my work outlining all of the chapters of the second act so stick around, you're in for a wild ride.

Nobody likes a traitor, Lyra. :twilightangry2:

Vinyl cracked a huge smile and levitated one of the bags out of the box and a knife from her hip. As she cut it open and spread a good sized line on the table she put her nose straight to the table and gave a huge sniff. Her eyes grew wide and she slammed both hooves down on the table, sitting her head up straight. “Holy shit. That’s what I’m talkin’ about!” She then quickly stood up and began speaking loud and fast.

Vinyl, never get high off of your own supply. :facehoof:

6967270 You would be surprised how many people forget about that rule. I've seen quite a few people get burnt from doing it over the years. I even did it myself at one point and ended up fucking myself over pretty big time.

I'm loving this story thus far! Especially because of the way you write and the fact that you really seem to have a solid understanding on how to write! I've only caught one error out of this and the previous chapter.

Later that evening on the seventh floor of Sunsets office building...

You forgot to add an apostrophe to make "Sunsets" possessive.:derpytongue2:

Welp, I think the shit has now hit the fan.

I almost wanna stop reading now, but alas, I will continue until the knot is ofically tied before I give up on TaviScratch.

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