X in Equestria

by RoseluckyCinor

Legolas

(To IronPudding(A not tasty pudding))

Legolas

Legolas, after years of living in Middle- Earth after the fall of Sauron, decided that it was time to move on, to go to the lands of Valinor where he could live in peace and quiet. The boat glided through the mists of the seas. Legolas was getting slightly nervous; he had decided to take the journey alone, but he had never heard of the journey taking so long.

A week of sailing in what seemed to be circle, Legolas saw an outline of what me the majestic Elf city of… Pittsburg. However, as he drew closer, he realized it was not so. Instead of sweeping elvish vistas, he saw stone architecture reminiscent of the human cities he left behind. He was reminded slightly of Minas Tirath.

The boat pulled up close to the shore as close as he could before hitting the banks. Cautiously he grabbed his faithful bow and quiver before disembarking.

“What is this strange land?” he wondered aloud. The grass felt different to him, and the whispering of the trees was ominously gone. “I can feel Sauron’s corruption here.” Legolas looked around the small town he was in. Stone buildings surrounded him for as far as he could see in the mists.

“This is not the land of Valinor…” he muttered bleakly, luxurious blond hair blowing in the wind. His steps echoed through the streets, his normal lofty elvish strides missing. He heard a conversation in the street adjacent to him, as if around the corner. Throwing his back to the wall he knocked an arrow and pulled the string back. Peering around the corner, he saw something truly horrifying.

In front of him stood two small, pastel equines. They chatted lazily, unaware of the elf around the corner. Legolas pulled his head back and began to think. What sort of magic has corrupted my ancestor’s once great home? Worried about the true meaning of the ponies, he leapt around the corner and approached the ponies.

“My friends, what caused this transformation? Why are you now ponies?” he asked. The ponies looked at each other blankly.

“Uh, we’ve always been ponies,” said one.

“Surely not!” Legolas yelled.

The other one chimed in, “it is so, and we’ve just always been ponies. Also, don’t call me Shirley.” Worried, Legolas began to get sweaty.

“But… but… the elves…,” he trailed off bleakly.

“Do you know where you are? Do you need an adult?” Legolas nodded, this was getting hard. The two ponies lead him to a castle. They claimed their princesses lived there. In the throne room sat a brilliant, white pony.

“I am Celestia,” she declared, “who are you?”

“I am Legolas of the Woodland Realms. I came seeking my kind’s land of Valinor. Upon what land have I landed?”

“You have landed in Equestria, but I must ask, how did you get here?”

“I arrived at the shoreline of the city,” Legolas said confidently. Celestia looked blankly for a minute.

“We don’t have a shoreline. This city is built on a mountain. Perhaps you should-“ Legolas cut her off.

“It must be Sauron’s taint!” Legolas whipped out his bow and fire and arrow indiscriminately. Time seemed to slow down as the arrow hit an orc that appeared from nowhere. “See?” The orc, being too far away for any normal thing to see, was irrelevant.

“No, I don’t,” said Celestia.

“Then it must be a Balrog. I can see it with my elf eyes!” Legolas fired another arrow, hitting a balrog no one else could see and felling it.

“What are you doing? Stop shooting your bow in my throne room,” demanded Celestia.

“Horse, I’m sexy,” Legolas said with a cocky smile. Celestia just stared.

“Are you okay?” asked Celestia.

“Okay doesn’t even begin to describe it…. I’m… sexy!” Legolas struck a pose that could only be described as a lady-killer. It was so successful that is was also a man-killer. Celestia was too close to the pose that she was immediately in love with the elf. Even the male guards in the room became hopelessly lost in his stunning blue eyes.

“Time for stunts,” said Legolas as he jumped out of the stained glass windows, shattering them into millions of pieces. As Legolas started to slide down arches of the castle the glass reflected the light, throwing bright colors onto the stunning elf. The elf knocked a few more arrows and let loose on some pottery, display unrivaled prowess in archery.

As Legolas hit the ground, he made a terrible realization. None of the events that were happening to him were canon. His world was being torn asunder by the errant writings of some novice.

“This shall not do!” he screamed as he ran to the boat which was near the shore of Canterlot. His boat sailed quickly away from the mysterious lands due to northerly winds.

Comments

[clearshot01]

I like this. Do you think you'd be able to make one with Edward Elric from Fullmetal Alchemist?

[RoseluckyCinor]

474901
Is that the guy in the armor?

[clearshot01]

474903
No, Edward is the short one. The one in the armour is his younger brother Alfons. Imagine Ed in a world full of ponies and him still being shorter than everyone. Everyone would point it out and he'd constantly be trying to kill them for calling him short. Just for safety, you might wanna have Al go with him to hold him back so he doesn't do anything stupid

[catrianheir]

This is funny in a disturbingly random way, however I must ask: what. the. fuck.

[RoseluckyCinor]

475004
Always leave the reader asking, "why?"

[catrianheir]

I bet you could make an example of Hancock from the movie Hancock.
or you could do Nigel Thornberry
or Jackie Chan
or Chanelle West Coast
or M Night Shayamalan
or Steven King
or Edward Collin getting killed by Twilight Sparkle
or Jack Black
or that creepy guy from Yo Gabba Gabba
or John Travolta
or Buttercup from the Power Puff Girls
or Terrence from Fosters Home for Imaginary Friends
or Beowulf
or Ratchet from Ratchet and Clank
or Chris Redfield form Resident Evil
or Barry from Pokemon (or Bianca, they both have the same effect)
or Dee Dee from Dexter's Laboratory
or Jack the Ripper
or Death the Kid

These demands must and will be met or every day that they are not; I will kill one meep (if that's okay with you, of course).

[RoseluckyCinor]

475106
>Edward Collin getting killed by Twilight Sparkle
:o

[catrianheir]

475113 It just seems fitting you know

[IronPuddinG]

I approve.

[CaptRicoSakara]

475106

What about also:

-The Mask and Pinkie Pie causing havok.
-Freakazoid and Pinkie Pie causing havok some more.
-Beetlejuice and Pinkie Pie causing havok and sending ponies to their graves.
-Animaniacs and Pinkie Pie DESTORYING the forth AND FIFTH walls.
-Ace Ventura: Pet Detective trying to help Fluttershy find one of her missing pets, and end up in the Artic.
-The Terminator ending up in Ponyville, Equestria, instead of 1984 Los Angeles.
-Q & Discord going bowling for no reason.
-Michael Jackson and Pinkie Pie in a music video. (I let you decide the song)
-Mr. Hyde from "Jekyll and Hyde: Together Again" getting Celestia and Luna high on drugs, and having sex with them, not knowing they are ponies because he is still high on drugs. FTW?!

[CaptRicoSakara]

What about also:

-The Mask and Pinkie Pie causing havok.
-Freakazoid and Pinkie Pie causing havok some more.
-Beetlejuice and Pinkie Pie causing havok and sending ponies to their graves.
-Animaniacs and Pinkie Pie DESTORYING the forth AND FIFTH walls.
-Ace Ventura: Pet Detective trying to help Fluttershy find one of her missing pets, and end up in the Artic.
-The Terminator ending up in Ponyville, Equestria, instead of 1984 Los Angeles.
-Q & Discord going bowling for no reason.
-Michael Jackson and Pinkie Pie in a music video. (I let you decide the song)
-Mr. Hyde from "Jekyll and Hyde: Together Again" getting Celestia and Luna high on drugs, and having sex with them, not knowing they are ponies because he is still high on drugs. FTW?!

[AccessDeniedLULZ]

I can't hear ou over the sound of how awesome I am.
images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/25500000/Legolas-legolas-greenleaf-25589661-1000-802.jpg

[The Music Man]

This is about 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000x better than The Hobbit, and 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000x better then moldy bread!

[Dawn Darkling]

No.