City On the Edge of Annihilation
The polished surfaces of the Val Roan buildings reflected a silver sheen of starlight as night fell. Rainbow Dash hugged the upper exteriors, flying as low to the rooftops as she could in order to maintain a proper height. From her position, she could make out the majority of the city.
The Val Roan Capital gradually rose in both constructed height as well as architectural affluence the further the city spread to the north. Further south, the buildings were shorter—but also denser and more geometrically rigid. Square-shaped apartment complexes bled into one another, with rising and falling terraces connecting and adjoining to create a complicated network of fused living hovels. Several open rooftops were dotted with tents and wooden shacks. In that part of town, it was obvious that multiple citizens lived together in tight spaces, but it was anything but impoverished squalor.
To the southwest, the tight apartments gave way to large courtyards framed by rectangular facilities. Rainbow squinted and saw what appeared to be fenced-in compounds full of military equipment and army supplies. She surmised that that was where the Val Roan Defense Ministry was located. Judging from a faint hint of green luminescence, she imagined that several Soul Sentries were in training there. She made a mental note to keep her distance from the place.
Southeast, several tiny homes dotted the desert landscape. Unlike the apartments to the west, these were remarkably spaced apart. Rainbow Dash saw patches of green earth and cactus gardens. She suspected that some sort of agricultural project was underway in that section of the city. But the further her eyes scanned, she detected large buildings in the distance—including two domed structures flanked by what appeared to be gray cemeteries. She assumed that it was an assortment of temples, or some sort of Val Roan religious center. The landscaping was noticeably beautiful, even under the cold fabric of desert night, and it was evident to her that the district hugged the furthest edge of the city right along the fringes of the Grand Choke.
Shuddering slightly, Rainbow Dash peered north. Presently, she hovered over the Sandstone District, which was just along the edge of Downtown. Just a few blocks away, the buildings scaled the highest, scraping the sky with their bronze-capped spires and obelisks. It was obvious to the pegasus that the structures were polished to carry a dazzling shine under the midday sun, but they held a beautiful mystique with the starlight all the same. Flying past a few towers, Rainbow Dash gazed at a large temple situated towards the northeast. It was an enormous dome framed by six looming towers. At the top of each tower was the bronze effigy of an elk, with golden antlers spreading majestically in the desert air. It didn't take long for Rainbow Dash to guess that this was the location of the High Council. She considered doing a close fly-by, but held it off, instead continuing her scan of the city proper.
Due north, the buildings lowered somewhat in height, replaced instead by an enormity in scale. Beyond the Sandstone District and the High Council building, Rainbow spotted an enormous courtyard stretching the full length of the city. Several glowing spots of green dotted the concrete lengths at regular intervals. It was obvious to the pegasus that this part of town was being heavily guarded, and she maintained a high altitude as she continued her observations.
The courtyard bent around—she discovered—forming a gigantic half-circle. Towards the outer bend, a series of cylindrical buildings rose up out of the earth, growing taller and thinner in the form of multiple smooth spires. In the center of this was a sturdy structure built in an elliptical shape—stretching north and south—and it was flanked by polished ivory balconies that wrapped around each ascending platform. Towards the summit, a balcony encompassed the entire southern end, and there was a ledge that overlooked the courtyard below. Rainbow guessed that this was none other than the spot where the Val Roan Monarchy addressed the masses in attendance. Already she could spot crystalline stones whose purpose was likely to project the sound of one's voice. If the Coronation was soon, then she imagined the courtyard beneath her would be filled to the brim with Val Roan citizenry not long from then.
Rainbow Dash flapped her wings, hovering up high. From there, she had a view of the entire city, which was no easy feat to her strained eyes. This place was easily the largest urban environment she had ever witnessed—aside from Silvadel, but only because that place had been long ruined by the time she arrived. There was no questioning the fact that Val Roa was the most important, populated, and influential place on that entire continent, and she almost understood the goblins and nagas' envy for its glory.
Reaching under her pendant, Rainbow Dash produced the map that the Duchess Arcanista had given her. Holding it still in the cold desert winds, she gave the thing a once-over, comparing the named districts and highlighted zones to the urbanscape she had just naturally observed. She drew a plan up in her mind. Assuming she could go about without being observed, she would examine the High Council Building, the Royal Palace, and the military district—not necessarily in that order. If there was any chance whatsoever of catching Fishberry, Sharp Quill, or Saikano without them knowing about it, then she had to do so with as much swiftness and stealth as possible.
Rainbow Dash put her map away. Once more, she gazed at the town, considering her three options. However, her gaze was distracted, drawn instead towards the east. She blinked, spotting the hazy lavender glow of Yaerfaerda from a nebulous distance.
Her teeth suddenly chattered. She hugged herself in mid-hover, as if suddenly aware of how chilly the desert winds were. Clenching her jaw, she glanced back at the three districts, then back east again. In a fuming breath, she flapped her wings and glided eastward towards the edge of the city, descending sharply as she did so.
Despite the bitter cold of desert night, several deer and ponies were out and about on the terraced rooftops of the residential district. Servants and workers huddled outside of tents, laughing and chatting around well-maintained fire pits. Foals and fawn chased each other around, giggling in the starlight. Along balcony edges, elders sat, smoking pipes and sharing stories and songs of yesteryear.
Slowly, Floydien shuffled through this nocturnal populous. With jaded eyes, he glared past them, making his way gradually southwest. A few Val Roans eyed him curiously—perhaps confused as to why a noble-looking buck would be without his antlers, but they said nothing of it.
In the lower streets, brief strobes of green light emanated from the Soul Sentries as they sat meditatively at their posts. Floydien kept his distance, continuing his unassuming stroll until he winded up as far as he could, standing on a balcony's edge along the southwest fringe of that particular cluster of apartments.
From afar, he stared at the military compounds that comprised the southwest corner of Val Roa, hugging the mountains that barricaded the capital from the rest of the continent. Along the hilly extremities of the valley, he saw the twinkling green line of soul sentries and their barricade. Down below, dim orange torches lined each compound. He saw the dots of soldiers patrolling along the barracks and equipment depots. Antlers glowed in the hush of night, and not a single equine was to be seen. But, then again, the elk's eyes weren't necessarily his strongest suit.
A long, slow breath filtered out of the pilot's lungs. His ears folded back, and he stared down at the balcony's edge with a melancholic pause. Eventually, his muzzle tensed. Frowning, he spun around, marching back the way he came, oblivious to the hushed cheer and merriment of the citizens around him.
On soft feathers, Rainbow Dash descended. She landed on all four hooves. The gravelly earth crunched beneath her, and several pebbles shifted into a thin layer of sand over an arid plateau.
Rainbow exhaled, her moisture forming a fine mist in the air. She trotted limply forward, eyes thin and contemplative.
Before her stretched an infinite, impossibly level horizon of nothing. It was the flattest, plainest, most nondescript landscape she had ever seen. Every star along the vanishing point glimmered with eerie clarity. She suspected that if she looked long enough... hard enough, then she might—for once—make out the gradual curve of the earthen plane. Momentarily, it made some sense why the Yaerfaerda symbol was so faint, for it was so far away that it dipped below the visible terrain.
Rainbow Dash stood along the eastern edge of Val Roa, staring out upon the Grand Choke. She glanced left and right. At regular intervals, several statues had been erected, depicting deer and elk in majestic hoof-kicking poses. Their eastern faces were faded, worn down by the elements—or something else, Rainbow Dash surmised. The antlers of the guardian effigies had crumbled and fallen off in many places over time, but it was obvious that no Val Roan had bothered fixing them over the centuries.
Even further out into the desolation, Rainbow spotted objects planted randomly in the ground. Upon further observation, she discovered that they were weapons, spears, lances and broadswords. Beads and necklaces and other personal effects dangled off the hilts of these objects, and beneath each rusted blade or javelin she saw a smattering of stones heaped together. If Rainbow Dash squinted hard enough, she could see that many other graves were spread out further east, as far as souls had dared to travel to bury the honorable denizens of that city on the edge of annihilation. The greater the distance from the capital's edge to the graves, the more elaborate the setup, until they were far too obscure to observe...
For Rainbow Dash wasn't moving an inch.
She felt a lump in her throat as she stood there, locked in place. Eventually, she reached a hoof down, scooping up a clump of earth. She tilted her fetlock to the side, feeling as the sand and sediment poured off of her, dissolving in the wind. Then, once again, everything was desolation and emptiness.
Beyond it all, like a faraway lighthouse, the lavender candle of Yaerfaerda beckoned.
Rainbow Dash shuddered. It took a great deal of struggle, but she turned around and faced west once again. From there, the spires looked like tiny termite minds, decaying in a barren valley.
Nevertheless, Rainbow Dash flapped her wings, lifting herself off and heading towards the first destination her mind thought of: the Royal Palace.
Behind her, the Grand Choke remained, silent, empty, and waiting.
Stats
Page generated in 0.04 seconds
Total duration
687 users online
1,074,588 hits today, 2,561,572 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
An empty desert near the end of the world...joy.
The Grand Choke is foreboding as fuck, man...
Thirty crunches, ):(. Knock 'em out!
I can't help but wonder how tales of the Grand Choke spread so far.
I feel like there's more beyond the grand choke than is being let on. Many theory's, no evidence, I'll keep them to myself... for now.
Hmm...This bodes ill...
So, what's this series about, anyway?
5232262 as of that chapter there is not enough data to accurately place the individual on the Paranoia Watch Scale TM
on a more serious note, she is at the highest alert level for simply being an unkown-yet-important player
read the legend all the way
So the Yaerfaerda symbol is on the other side of a field of death, huh? Symbolic.
On that note, I'm gonna make the prediction that Josho isn't going to survive Val Roa*, for complicated and barely-supported reasons I won't get into here.
*Or will leave the Jury/stay behind.
Something tells me Floydien got recognized. IIRC, he was a popular figure before his "death"; it would make sense that someone would recognize him even without his antlers.
#sceneryporn
Beautiful city, but one ever on the edge of a vast and foreboding nothing. Just sitting on a border leading to desolation.
Just...strange, different, weird.
IIRC which was also desert-related...
Well, I hope Dashie deosn't get spotted during her recon mission. I think that's about the best that can be hoped for at the current moment.
I wonder if he remembered something...also, I wonder what the cheering's about.
Only the eastern side of the statues were eroded. What is doing the damage?
Oh man, the description really seems like it's going to set the tone for what's coming next.
5232362
Its a story about Rainbow Dash flying, particularly in an easterly direction.
::SLAP:: Ow.
I don't want to ruin the story by summarizing it. A lot of the strength early on comes from the fact that the audience doesn't know why Rainbow left Equestria, and the lack of knowing made the slow reveal (yes, you do eventually learn) orders of magnitude better. The narrative slowly becomes more complicated and involved as more of the past and current situation is revealed, but the early chapters were never boring despite the lonely setting.
This is one of the best stories on FIM Fic. It's huge, you'll need to read quite a bit to catch up, but it is really worth it.
It's always nice to just have a chapter that amounts to nothing more than giving us a better mental image of her new locale.
Dash seems genuinely frightened by the Grand Choke. That's... unnerving.
5232362 Rainbow Dash leaves Equestria on a quest that she doesn't expect to complete, and on the way does a lot of getting into trouble and helping out random ponies. She finds out she's some prophecied savior or something and ends several increasingly deadly wars.
That's about as far as we've gotten.
The Yaerfaerda symbol fled her vision across the desert...
And Rainbow Dash followed.
5232468 My guess is the sand blasting in from the desert.
5232307 Couldn't have put it better myself.
Also, anyone else notice there are no pony statues, only deer and elk. I wonder why.
5232326 I've wondered that too. Rainbow first heard about the Grand Choke just after crossing the Equestrian border, way back in Windthrow. Since then Rainbow has crossed a mountain range, two countries, a massive desert, two more countries, an ocean, then two more countries before reaching the Choke itself.
The plane is curved? I thought it was flat.
The Grand Choke sure seems foreboding.
hmmm... trepidation upon the edge.....
still stalling for time
when you know
you must go
5232421
yes
The Grand Choke has been being played up since the bloody beginning. Colon has been building this ubiquitous tale of an unspeakably vast and virtually impassable landscape from Windthrow. Even through six books, we hadn't reached it, and I feel we are still a long way from truly starting the journey across it. I was starting to think we wouldn't find it at all before this arc began.
And yet, there it is. It wasn't enough to spin the fable for this long, now he's deliberately dangling it before our eyes. And one cannot deny, it has presence. Along with it comes the atmosphere of the Jury's imminent division, that we're incredibly close to the edge of the world and that Rainbow has very little left in the tank. This place is the game-changer here. This foreboding sense of impending doom and all this goddamn foreshadowing have a lot to answer for.
When we finally enter that desert... it's going to be something else.
We are in for one wild time.
But for now, bugs and bureaucratic sludge, jolly good.
5233075 Nope. The world is but one of twelve segments that together used to form a ring. This was revealed way back in Innavedr, when Belle sequenced with the captured Xonan foals (if I remember correctly—I think it also involved the ancient pegasi skeletons). It was also part of the revelation of the meaning of the word Urohringr.
Y'know, after having heard about the Grand Choke since practically the beginning of the story--having it towering, lurching, over the story's future like some Lovecraftian abomination waiting on the other side of every door--now that we "see" it first-hand, it still manages to exude such narrative presence. Like Jake said, it's foreboding as all get-out. It was also great getting a bit more of a feel of what Val Roa itself is like. I always enjoy these descriptive, dialogue-free chapters.
5233151 Oh, I kinda thought it flattened out after the ring separated.
5233186 The segments have never been described as flattened, and quite simply it would be impossible to flatten them without causing massive, deep tears on the interior, sunlit side.
The City And The Stars. The City At The End Of Time. Denpasar. On the horizon, she can see the stars, CLEARLY. On the horizon, there is No Air.
The Grand Choke isnt the mountain channel restriction. Its the loss of air, as if the end of the plane was the top of an immense mountain, with the atmosphere being held in a bubble towards the lower, central part? Like the giant mountain caused by an impact in Ringworld? How much of each end of the plane was vapourised clean, or just blast stripped when the origional ring split and seperated?
I wonder how long it would take Dash to fly to the Mausoleums, assuming theres still an atmosphere there, and if she could take a good enouygh telescope to see to the end of the plane, given I can see 50 miles from the end of the hill, and a 100 times telescope is pretty compact and would let her see most of a planetary diameter equivalent. Also, shouldnt the end of the plane, if any, be bending Upwards? Being as life is on the inner side? Or has the section straightened out?
Poor Floydien. Noone recognises him, he remains along. someone recognises him, things get very.. intresting..
Ah, The Grand Choke we finally actually get to see some of it.
Besides the whole "magic canceling" effect and the fact that it's a giant, completely barren desert, I wonder if there is anything else dangerous about the Grand Choke...
5233614
aye, but we have too little info at the moment to decide
hence the spastic paranoid watch of ALL the pony/elk/deer/carribou/...... buck it THINGIES
that aside, arcanista isn't clear, she's simply unlikely at the moment
though anymore missteps and she's gunna rise......
AND WAITING!
5232307 5232487 5233138 5233178
Wouldn't it be anticlimactically hilarious if the trip across the Grand Choke ends up being a total walk in the park?
5233075 5233151 5233213
I always thought the ring world was flat too, like a huge donut or washer, rather than the surfaces curving inward (a la Halo) or outward.
So I guess this means the "light side" of the world is the outer surface and the "dark side" is the inner?
5233994
I always thought of it as a ring with the light world on the outside and the dark world on the inside.
5233994 In one of Dash's cosmic dreams, the intact ring has a light source in the center. That implies it's the inner surface that's lit. I don't remember if Celestia has said which side her sun lights up, only that she was not strong enough to light both sides.
5233239
5233994
you know, I don't think it was ever established which side, the original inner or outer side, the alicorns decided to light up. Also, I thought Celestia and Luna had been unaware that the plane was originally part of a ring. Don't quote me on that.
5234008 Wasn't the ring shown as having a beacon of light floating in the middle of it lighting up the inside? So it would actually be the other way around then.
This chapter gave me the willies with its description of the Grand Choke!
5232326
Yeah... since Val Roa is supposedly so isolationist, there must be some eerie shit going down with it.
Like, even if it is exactly as described and purely mundane, it would be creepy, but we know it's anathema to magic in some way. There's probably some supernatural component to the legend.
5233994
Hmmm...
I found this to be fitting the mood extremely well. Poor Rainbow Dash, afraid of the future. Poor, poor Floydien, afraid of the past. She lost her friends and her love. He lost his world, his love, his friend, his name and finally himself. No chips left on this shoulder, no pride and growing older.
5233075 Well if nothing else we now know that the light side of the world is the outside of the former ring.
5234019 The original sun of the whole construct is not the same as the one now hovering over the light side that the alicorns improvised.
A blue mare by a city wall in the middle of night
Gazes the horizon with desert winds in her face
Desert wind tossed oasis, seasons all the same
Anchorage unpainted and a ship named Nancy Jane
Sea without a shore for the banished one unheard
She lightens the beacon light at the end of world
Showing the way, lighting hope in their hearts
The ones on their travels homeward from afar
This is for long forgotten light at the end of the world
Horizon crying the tears she left behind long ago
The albatross is flying, making her daydream
The time before she became one of the world's unseen
Princess in the barn, friends in the town
Life gave her it all an island of the universe
Oh, now her love's a memory, a ghost in the fog
She sets the sails one last time saying farewell to the world
Element off her neck, dark side far below
Grass still in her feet and a smile beneath her brow
This is for long forgotten light at the end of the world
Horizon crying the tears we left behind long ago
So long ago, so long ago
This is for long forgotten light at the end of the world
Horizon crying the tears we left behind so long ago
So long agoo
Totally made me feel like making a two-minute edit of the lyrics of Islander, by Nightwish.
5233733 Land Sharks
5234561
What the fuck, bro. You're stealing my job.
As revenge, I'm going to steal yours.
Change to "Okay" or "OK".
Change to "on" or "in"
Change to "Zaid's head"
Change to "and he cleared"
Missing a period at the end.
Missing end comma.
Also fuck you.
"Pegasus" isn't normally capitalized.
Change to "Endrax's"
Missing end comma.
Replace comma with period.
"Into" works better.
"Taking" works better.
Pluralize "pegasus" with an ending apostrophe.
Replace comma with semicolon or em dash.
HOW'S IT FEEL
5235180 new1.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/4260382+_e21a31ca447db9824af1ab5806096e7e.jpg
Meh. Dry land and desert surpasses snow and glacier anytime. But lush valleys and dense forests are better than any of those.
Next time we're probably in space.
5235180 Hey! It's my job too!
Roarke doesn't do nonchalant. Dryly is more her style.
That would be: change from "on" to "in."
Not pluralize, possessive-ize.
Now start writing chapter 6 so I can harass you some more.
5235180
5235452
It's nice to know you care.
5233239
Intriguing ideas....
"The natives refer to the mountain as FIST OF CELESTIA"
5235570
5235180
You know what? I think I want to do Swannie's job too. Here's my take:
Am I hired?
5236018
You are forgetting two things.
Quadropeds.
Larry Niven.
It wouldnt be Fist Of God.
It would be, Hooffall.
The Grand Choke. It's vaaaaaaaaaaaast!
Come to think of it, the chapter title reminds me of The City on the Edge of Forever, the famous Star Trek episode, not that there's any connection. I'd say this is a coincidence rather than a reference.