The Deer Prince and the Grasshoppers
“Morning!” an imp shouted at the bow to Haman's battleship. He spun around, opening his grimy mouth wide while pointing at the pulsating dawnlight rising in the east. “The Morning sun rises!”
Haman took a long, steamy breath. He spat onto the lid of his walker's metal panel and wheezed, “It's time.” He pivoted and motioned towards a subordinate.
A tall goblin besides Haman marched across the top deck, shouting commands to the workers. “All hands, prepare for battlestations! Set course for the southern edge of the deer capital! Maximum speed!”
“Aye! All skystone engines charged!”
“Weapons are fully modified to channel the skystone energy!”
“Reports coming in from the Alpha Vessel! They're fully rigged with skystone and ready to move out!”
“Affirmative!” The tall goblin spun towards Haman. “On your mark, big boss.”
Haman's mucusy eyes narrowed. “What are you waiting for, runt? Full speed ahead!”
“Full speed ahead!”
Along the port and starboard sides of the ship, the vessel's propeller engines died out, giving way to glaring skystone thrusters. The atmosphere heated up and the bulkheads rattled for a brief instant before giving way to a steady hum. With ripples of vaporous energy, the battleship surged forward. Off the starboard side, several hundreds of yards away, an identical battleship accelerated at a matching velocity.
Thus, in tandem, both goblin vessels roared north, illuminated by the rising sun as they scaled desert valleys and mountains, heading towards a splotch of bronze urbanity in the distance.
“This is it.” Haman produced a wide, slimy smile. “The end of deerkind, and the dawn of goblins.” He spat again. “I already relish the smell of their burning corpses...”
Prince Eine nodded off, his tiny body draped in rags as he curled his body into a stone niche between skyscrapers.
Just then, a series of hooves landed in front of him, scuffling across the concrete.
“Guhh—Aahh!” The fawn sat up, yellow eyes exploding wide.
“Mrmmmf!” Kera spat out a burlap sack and made a tattooed face at the monarch. “Calm down, will ya? It's only me.”
“Mmmmfff...” Eine leaned back, rubbing his face with a cloven hoof. “God in Heaven... I thought a reindeer had found us.”
“Don't be ridiculous.” Kera grinned proudly in the foggy morning light. “You think one of those possessed guards would have brought you food?”
“F-food?” Eine's stomach instantly growled. He stood up straight, nearly salivating. “You mean you found us something to eat?!”
“Did I find us something to eat?!” Kera squee'd. “You wouldn't believe my luck! I snuck up on this dark alleyway and an entire wall was covered with these suckers! Hah! It was like diving into a royal banquet!”
“These... suckers...?” Eine blinked as Kera dumped the contents of her bag right in front of him. He instantly flinched, tilting his disgusted face away from a veritable pile of carapaces and twitching insect limbs. “Good heavens, no!”
“Hey! Come onnnn!” Kera frowned, shoving several of the fat juicy grasshoppers his way. “I figured you'd at least be grateful. Especially after I went through the trouble of biting their heads off for you!” Her cheeks turned a little bit rosy. “Okay, in truth, I enjoyed every bite. But still!”
“That was... abundantly k-kind of you, but I fear that I am incapable of devouring them...”
“What the hay, dude?!” Kera blinked awkwardly. “Back when you were the 'Royal Caterer's Son,' you did nothing but praise grasshoppers! You even claimed to have eaten some of them yourself, haven't you?”
“Well, yes.” Eine gulped. “But they had always been accompanied by an abundance of m-melted choclate.”
“Ugh... fine.” Kera plopped down across from him and unceremoniously threw two grasshoppers into her mouth, chomping away. “Mrmmmff... no wonder your kind becomes hemopheliacs. I mean... mrmmmf... with blood that thin... am I right?”
Eine's face grimaced. Nevertheless, his stomach growled again. Shivering, the little prince reached a hoof out from underneath his raggedy garments and plucked one insect off the floor. Cringeing, he held the thing up to his mouth and bit off a few limbs.
“Hah!” Kera gulped and grinned. “Nice try... but you'll never get to the nourishing pulp that way!”
“Pffft... ffftt...” Eine spat the combed limbs out like hairs stuck on his tongue. “N-nourishing... pulp...?” Suddenly, Kera's hoof lunged forward as if she was delivering his face a right hook. Instead, she shoved the remainder of the grasshopper deep in his gullet. Eine's eyes crossed, and he had no choice but to bite down. His nostrils flared, and he looked ready to vomit. Nevertheless, he soldiered on through, biting the insect's thorax to a fine mush before swallowing the nutrients with a modicum of difficulty. Once finished, he slumped over, his tongue hanging out as he wheezed nauseatingly.
“H-heyyyy!” Kera smiled proudly. “That wasn't so bad, was it?”
“Mrmmff... d-do forgive me...” Eine wiped his chin, shuddering. “I'm afraid that I'm not entirely accustomed to such a... rugged existence.”
“Meh. It's not rugged, dude. If anything, it's rather normal.”
Eine squinted at her. “You consider living on the street and dining on large insects to be normal?”
Kera shrugged. “Hey, I can manage it. And I have for a long time. When the Noble Jury found me, I was pretty darn lucky. Heck, I still am. But I've always sort of known that any little thing would put me back in my place. Voila! Here I am again!” She munched on half of a grasshopper and gulped the morsel down. “Mrmmf... Survival takes effort. Even for a Prince! Or a King. I mean... you gotta struggle to find that sweet spot where you're in charge of an entire kingdom and yet earning their trust all the same. That can't be easy. Heck... can't be much fun either. I bet you don't get out of the palace much.”
Eine shook his head. “Not after my parents passed away.” He gulped. “But I've never questioned it. Besides, the Palace isn't exactly a prison. Between my luxuries and my literature and my resources, I'm quite fortunate to have the entire world at my disposal. I aim to utilize such gifts in ruling my subjects... only, I'm afraid, not much trust or authority has been granted to me.”
“Well, at least you're humble about it all,” Kera said. “All in all, you don't strike me as much of a pushover. So you've got that going for ya.”
“Erm... thank you.” Eine blinked awkwardly. “That's quite the charming compliment... I think.”
“Don't worry, Prince-o.” Kera smirked. “As soon as the Jury sweeps in and mops the floor with Chrysalis' horn, then you'll be sitting tall and proud on your throne once again, steering this whole kingdom to clear blue skies.”
Eine shuddered, staring up at the light cascading down the skyscrapers above them. “I would most certainly hope so.” All of the sudden, his ears twitched to the sound of distant shouts and tremorous mutterings. “Uhm... good Lord...” He grimaced in Kera's direction. “What on earth is all that racket?”
“I dunno.” Kera shrugged. “While I kept searching for grub, I heard the same thing. It's happening practically in every street.”
“Sounds... sounds like the citizenry...” Eine winced. “They sound so angry... and alarmed!” He gawked at her. “What in Heaven's name for?”
“You asking me?” Kera bit another grasshopper in half, shrugged, and said, “I think it's because their Prince was supposed to be coronated this morning. And instead... he's missing.”
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Well, if they had been covered in chocolate instead, they might have turned out to be hemophiliacs. Probably much worse.
...Nnnnnnnnnnnnno. I-I actually think it might be the Cartel's twin battleships approaching the city...
Heh.
No "e" in "cringing".
5472346 You should be happy! There's so much shipping!
5472387 But she's force feeding insects to him on the second date
Chocolate has a second O.
5472412
Sounds romantic, to me. I know if my wife started shoving grasshoppers down my throat I'd be practically swooning. I see no reason for Eine not to react the same.
I... honestly ain't seeing the shipping here... and this is coming from a guy who practically sleeps in his shipping goggles!
Thirty crunches, ):(. Knock 'em out!
5472460
5472462 Might I suggest you sign up for Amazon Prime? It comes with free shipping.
5472460
... You have some very strange fetishes, mate.
Did the first battleship head back thriough where the border had been in order to meet up and get its Skystone upgrade, or was the origional soul sentry boundary just that big?
Crickets, Grahoppers, Locusts. the raisins, currents and sultanas of teh insect kingdom?
Hmm, chocolate raisens.
Man, there sure is a lot of good, interpersonal character development going on here. No sane author would put in all this effort just to kill them all off or abandon them at the end of the book, right?
...right?
5472863
plzno. I'm still trying to keep myself in denial.
Experiencing poverty first-hand and subsisting on scraps should probably be a prerequisite for anyone wanting to be a political figure.
5472863 Who ever said we were dealing with a sane author here?
5472965 ...shit.
5472460
41.media.tumblr.com/70c3f53ed22cdfca5c7ebdaf56ae6ead/tumblr_migds8epeL1qcxpn8o1_500.jpg
...Kera you troll
5472972 5472783 5472511
i.imgur.com/vyx1qDk.jpg
Actually, hemophilia amongst royalty was because of inbreeding........................why the fuck do I know that.
Oh man a bunch of rioting citizens I don't like the look of this one bit. This situation already has to much piled on to it as it is.
Daww~ Kera loves her little Eine so much.
I wonder if Zaid and some of the other characters have been kept in the story just to provide some tragic deaths at the end of this book.
Maybe Chrissy will show up at the coronation disguised as Eine?
Probably not.
5475023 I think it's the returning characters the ones that are in the most danger.
5471728
this line, yes?
mmm, at the time was he connected to "Mother" enough to be able to say it was Chrysi? Or would he have given the only name he could be sure of?
of course, now he is connected enough to know, and he would have said something if it was Tchern
5473541 Because you payed attention to the screwed up parts in your history classes?
Always love some sewer slumming.
ship has sustained minor damage due too...
well, what is it?
um, is says here that it was grasshoppers.
grasshoppers?
grasshoppers.
then fix the damage and get this ship sailing again
aye sir!
5473541 Why does Kera know that?
Looks like IC has a positive opinion on these insect delicacies.
Oh my. That doesn't sound good at all.
-Spirit
Kera and Eine won't get along as long as Eine hates grasshoppers. Time for him to buck up.
Mmm.. grasshoppers. They're actually really good, nice and crunchy. Although the raw one is a bit more sticky.
Kera, once again exercising her sass muscle
No Prince= no coronation. Who'da thunk.
Alright. Ever since the meeting of the "Evil Trinity" at first light at Shepherd's Rock, I've had two ideas about who's the queen in disguise. A lot of little things put together makes me think that she put herself in deep cover, as in that she thinks she Is who she's impersonating. It would also explain why it's so had for Ebon to find her, that he said she had "Changed". And now she acts thought instructions left behind in her three conspirators.
Now down to who.
She is either 1: Prince Erin. Which is why she kept the king and queen alive, to feed off there love for him. Or (And my personal favorite)
Number 2: She split herself into three parts and literally IS the "Evil Trinity" which is why they can't come to close together, or she'll reform without meaning to.
Prince and future Princess bonding over a shared arthropod meal.
7103848
Option 2 is probably spot on. That actually makes a lot of sense.
8707611
That is the most ridiculous and stupid thing I've ever heard.
Perhaps when this is over Eine might go on a camping trip, possibly with his family, to learn a little more about this kind of roughing it. It would be an enlightening experience for him.
10/14/2019
02:21 UTC
Gee, can't imagine who that is and where he's at.
*incoherent screech*