• Published 16th Sep 2014
  • 7,077 Views, 12,066 Comments

Yaerfaerda - Imploding Colon



Rainbow Dash and the Noble Jury continue to fly east.

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Only the Best Reunions Have Explosions

Schwissssssssh-Schlunk! Basso slid the door to the Tarkington's port side closed, shutting out the frost and blizzardy snow. As the ship ascended, he spun and smiled calmly at the rest of the ponies and deer on board.

“Well, I'd say we did that rather swimmingly.”

“The pilot!” Queen Azira stammered, craning her neck to see across the single cramped corridor of the cigar-shaped vessel. “Is he okay? Please tell me you can help him recover!”

“He'll live,” Lucky Strike said, kneeling with Tweak beside the reclining earth pony. The crystal brothers' glossy limbs glowed with inner magic as they tended to his wounds, bandaging his head before resting it against a crumpled pillow of cargo netting. “Which is a shame. He'll have to experience how pungent it gets in here, stuck with ten stallions with very little room to breathe.”

“Plus one mare.” Tweak smirked. “It's a scientific fact that when Zetta farts, it smells of flowers.”

“Hardy har har,” Zetta muttered, swiveling in her chair to face the console opposite of the weapon controls. She winced slightly from a pulse of mana flickering across her face. “Okay... Prowsy? I think I've mapped us a way out of here! It'll take us due south until we run parallel to the Val Roan perimeter.”

“Bloody well done, lassie!” the pilot hollered back from the cockpit. “I knew I made you diet Propsicle for a reason!”

Zetta rolled her eyes, then smirked aside at Basso. “I swear, I wouldn't be tagging along if the stallion didn't remind me of my father.”

“I'm scared to m-meet him someday,” the large pony said, shuddering.

“This rescue was swift and professional.” King Lunarius took a deep breath. “I cannot thank you ponies enough.”

“Hrmmmff...” Arcshod cracked the joints in his neck, marching across the cramped corridor on heavy hooves. “Ruhm drennden thriul, Valrulien krekke.”

Queen Azira blinked. “Uhm... what did he say?”

“Forgive my buddy back there,” Seclorum said, trotting up with a weathered smile. “He might be in the business of rescuing loyalty, but he'll only bow to a monarch if she's got a long-ass mane and a billion hoofmaidens.” The old soldier bowed. “I am former Prime Enforcer Seclorum. It's an honor to meet you.”

“Do you even know who we are?” Lunarius asked.

“Not quite,” Seclorum replied. “But if Josho is sticking his nose this deep into a shithole to save you two, then that means you've gotta be super high on the Val Roan ladder for the Noble Jury to care.”

“Pffft! Balls to you, ya graying turd,” Josho grumbled. “We've risked our coats for dozens of villages between the pegasus crater and here!”

“Heh... so much for your early retirement, eh?” Seclorum stepped back as he felt a lavender figure brushed past him.

Eagle Eye strolled forward, eyes glistening. “Crimson...?”

Crimson glanced past Phoenix from where he holstered his hammer against a bulkhead. He smiled warmly. “Hey there, EE.” He pivoted about on a whirring mechanical leg. “Wow, is it just me... or have you gotten more ripped since the last time I saw you?”

Eagle chewed on his lip, his ears folding back.

“Heh... it's okay, soldier,” Crimson said with a wink. “I know you're still soft on the inside.”

Eagle lunged forward, hugging Crimson fiercely. The larger stallion raised his good leg, holding Eagle close as the petite unicorn sobbed happily.

“I th-thought I'd never see you again! But you're here!” Eagle squealed, eyes tearing. “Oh, Spark, it's been so long!”

“Heh...” Phoenix sat back on his haunches with a smirk. “Same ol' princess.”

Eagle sniffled, leaning back to rub his cheek dry. He smiled up at Crimson, trembling. “Please... tell me... how's the family?”

“Sitting pretty in Aurum and living the good life,” Crimson said.

“Only mine's sitting prettier,” Tweak spoke from where he knelt, tending to Booster Spice. “Have you even seen Crimson's wife, kid? Whew! Makes Stasia look like a goddamn beauty queen.”

“Hah!” Lucky Strike chuckled. “I'm telling her you said that.”

“Do that and Zetta will be firing you out of the cannon, next.”

“Honestly, I'd be flattered.”

“Just stick to your doctoring, boys,” Zetta droned.

“Awwww...” Lucky Strike gazed at her, making a kissy face. “You're saying you don't want to handle me like a cannonball?”

“Your cannonballs could use a bit of adjusting ever since the Searonese nearly burned them to a crisp in their Hold.”

“Er... right. Ahem. Shutting up now.”

“So...” Eagle blinked at Crimson and Phoenix. “You've moved into Aurum just fine?”

“That we have.” Phoenix nodded. “Crimson's family. My folks.” He grinned. “What's more, a bunch of other Franzington clans headed east across the ravine as well. There's about two pilgrimages across the ruins of Foxtaur every month. Shoot, we're thinking about making a new name for the community!”

“Like Hell we will!” Tweak grumbled. “The name of 'Aurum' is the one thing standing between them and those Spark-forsaken Killas!”

“We can handle them, Tweak,” Crimson said in a droning tone. “If those dogs haven't already figured out who the land belongs to, then they're stupider than the Luxomaritan archives maintain!”

Eagle Eye perked up. “How... h-how is that going, by the way?”

“What, Luxomare?” Seclorum paced through the interior. “There's a brand new peace accord every week! The Council of Ledo is absolute history. Lately, the government's been representing the populous with a vengeance. Not only are we making friendly with the Xonans, but we've started work on... uhh... I guess you could call them 'exchange programs.'”

“Ah...” Josho nodded in the direction of Arcshod and his two fellow warriors. “I'm guessing that's how you got the Marked Brothers over there.”

“What, Arcy? Pffft.” Seclorum leaned over to nudge Arcshod in the side. “Queen Lasairfion personally gave them her royal blessing to assist me and Prowse in this... uh... mission of intense ambassadorial deliverance, if you catch my drift.” The old stallion smirked up at the towering Xonan. “Isn't that right, bud?”

“Dreit.” Arcshod nodded. He leaned forward, concentrating hard as he spoke into Josho's face: “It arrives to help... the fat of bastard...”

Josho gulped. “Well... uh... this fast of bastard is tickled of pink.”

“Then this is a royal mission?” King Lunarius asked. “You've been sent from foreign lands to aid Val Roa in our time of need?”

“Nothing of the sort, laddie.” With a limping gait, Prowse trotted in from the cockpit. The ship coasted south on autopilot as he leaned on his boomstick and bore a red-bearded smile. “We've been summoned by Rainbow Dash, the wee lass of colors who captains my niece's ship, the Noble Jury.” His eyes narrowed atop his thin skull. “Her friend, Bellesmith, summoned us to the blistery north to rescue your hides—royal or not. You see, we're in the business of savin' harmony and slayin' monsters, not necessarily in that order.”

Lunarius nodded, eyes firm. “And my kingdom is under attack by the most vile monster of all.”

“Not for bloody long, it isn't!” Prowse spat. “The Tarkington may be an uglier, cruddier leg of the Noble Jury, but if I know anythin' about hoppin' back from a bad injury, it makes you ten times more pissed off. We're gonna save yer kingdom of prancin' deerfolk if we have to headbutt our way through a mountain of changelings to do it!”

“Uhm...” Eagle Eye fidgeted. “It's only one changeling this time. Chrysalis and... uh... a bunch of mind-controlled deer at her command.”

“What bloomin' difference does it make, ya talkin' pile of knickers?!” Prowse bellowed. “I done gathered up all your wee friends from here to Freshmanton—”

“Franzington.”

“—to end what got started in Stratopolis!” Prowse's eyes narrowed. “And I'll be damned to soot-suckin' for all eternity if I dun do somethin' to honor the price Aatxe paid to make this little vacation possible! Ach!” He spun towards Zetta. “Diet Propsicle! Do the thang and make the skystone burn hotter!”

“Hmmm...” The mare smirked, yanking at a series of levers. “Aye, Cap'n, my Cap'n.”

“And do somethin' about this sod!” Prowse trotted over Booster Spice as he made his way back to the cockpit. “He's leakin' all over me pretty ship!”

Booster shuddered, breathing easier in the bandages being applied. “I... I don't get it...” He gulped. “Are these friends of you guys?”

Josho and Eagle Eye exchanged faces.

At last, Eagle smiled. He looked back at Booster. “More like family.”

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