• Member Since 27th Jun, 2012
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I write pony words. Millions of them. Some people actually think they might be worth reading. I am very thankful for that. Also, I have a Patreon now?


Curse that dratted mailmare!

Bon Bon makes candy. It's just in her nature. She's done it since she was very small. However, many of her usual customers are going to Canterlot, for Doughnut Joe has revealed new pastries and candies the likes of which Equestria has never seen. Bon Bon isn't happy about that, so when she discovers that the secret ingredients for Joe's candies are being transported from Ponyville by Derpy, she gathers some cohorts together to stop that Derpy!

Inspired by the old cartoon Dastardly and Muttley in their Flying Machines.

Find this story and more in a print copy! Just click these words here!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 48 )


Naked Singularity and Mood Wings two great fics that also exhibit a similar sense of humor

Oh wow, Dick Dastardly and Muttly in their Flying Machines. Now there's a blast from the past.

I would like to see more chapters just of their failed attempts!

I'll just leave this here.

Tee-hee :twilightsheepish:

I can see Lyra's excited face in the "Liar Lyre" short! :rainbowlaugh:

With her crew of experts, failure was unavoidable.

Er, don't you mean success is unavoidable? I mean sure, everyone reading the fic knows that disaster and mayhem are par for course, but I don't think Bon Bon feels that way. Either way, cool story, brony. :pinkiesmile:

Now it's stuck in your heads too!:pinkiecrazy:

Inspired by the old cartoon Dastardly and Muttley in their Flying Machines.

That's what I thought we I saw the title.

This brings back memories...

naked singularity, the reason why twilight does not try to write fanfictuion or fiction at ll

Oh but this is glorious. Dear author, I hope that one day you can bless us all with your MLP adaptation of Wacky Races as well.

Rassen fassen massen Bonbon!

Favorited and thumbed up before even reading as I know it will be excellent anyway.

Wow. Freaking wow. I haven't seen that show since I was....6? Maybe 7 years old? :pinkiegasp:

Next up, Celestia's mane

I fondly remember watching Dastardly and Muttley from my childhood mornings.

Those where simpler times... better times.

Wow. That brings me back. If only dastardly and muttley just raced, they would win everytime, seeing as they always got ahead and planted some ridiculous trap

Gonna read later.... just reading the title though is making me want to rewrite the lyrics! ^_^

Could half ass it but will read the fic first... might offer better inspiration. :derpyderp2:

Cannot. Like. Hard. Enough!

(Today Bon Bon will be using her DickDastardly voice...)

Sheer, unadulterated hysterical brilliance!

With one flaw.

Where's the song?! Dude, ya can't leave us hangin' like that!


Go for it! Somepony has to!

Wait! Not even Pinkie could beat her?!:derpyderp2::pinkiesad2:

5007700 Pure randomness cannot catch pure randomness, it seems.

One small change:
Lyra stopped giggling and glared at Bon Bon, muttering something unintelligible under her breath. Bon Bon gave a noise of disgust and rolled her eyes.



This appeals to my nostalgia so hard.

I don't know why, but even when I knew it wasn't, I couldn't help but think this was a "pinkie and the Brain" remake. I was like 4 the last time I saw that and I don't think I ever saw what this really is a remake of. due to this, I Feel like I have been left out of the loop, because it seems everyone else has seen this show. Oh well.

5006411 Kinda like RD and AJ sabotaging each other and getting beat by Biggest Nerd because of it? :twilightsheepish:

4993246 Huh, so there are people as old as me around here.

Wierd. *Alondro applies more Bengay to his rickety knees*



The Wacky Racers game for NES was actually a decent platformer with all the Racers as bosses as you controlled Muttly.

5015924 I think you misinterpret how timeless these shows are. I'm in my early 20s and I grew up watching this too.


Here's the intro. While watching it, keep in mind that...

1. Bon Bon is Dick Dastardly, the leader of the group who sings that song. Bon Bon's "Drat darny drat darn!" line is a reference to his many variations on "Drat, drat, and double drat!".
2. Lyra is Muttley.
3. Time Turner is Klunk.
4. Carrot Top is Zilly. (The only one who can understand Klunk)

Dastardly and Muttley started out as cartoon knock-offs (in Wacky Races) of Professor Fate and Max (from The Great Race) before getting their own show (Dastardly and Muttley in Their Flying Machines, partly inspired by Those Magnificent Men in their Flying Machines) which this fic is parodying.

Here's a compilation someone put together for more glimpses of the characters.

5016271 Nah, yer clearly at least 10,000 years older than sand. :raritywink:

5006411 I remember one time they purposely lost BECAUSE they didn't cheat to win it

Bon Bon stared at Derpy's retreating form, hardly able the events that had just unfolded.

I can hardly able this fic's events either.

You have just sent me on the mother of all nostalgia trips. I haven't seen those cartoons since I was 4 and it all came flashing back while I was reading this.

Discord's cloven hoof, my childhood...

Fun read. Silly. The hair clipping was a little eerie and even kinda creepy, but other than that, fun. Particularly how the four kept matching the antics of Dick Dastardly and his crew.

"I don't get it. It's a catapult, but what is the ammunition? How are we supposed to get Derpy this way?" Are we going to dry fire at her and scare the bag away from her?"
Is see

1. Extra quotation mark in the middle here.
2. I.

Derpy foils all! And has trophies of them too.

5093004 The secret ingredient is foal blood. No one would ever suspect Dinky of collecting it from her schoolmates! :fluttershbad:

5016271 I am just quietly reading, then I scroll up to add to my bookshelf and WHAM! Bonnie comes out and makes me poop myself.

Pffffft. Pinke has commited industrial espionage. That kind of makes sense. I would make this review longer and praise the comedy but that seems too easy.
I'd give it an 8 out of 10 because of the great comedy.

What also made this story good was the picture you chose for the title card. As you can tell I love Derpy... but now I fear her more. :rainbowderp:

Woah, that ending... things got a little dark. You do not mess with the Derp'Eye!

(Two things, one, "Naked Singularity: Event Horizons of Lust" ... I find this title both highly intriguing and the book that holds it highly fascinating for... reasons. And also, it took me a bit to figure out why the language use seemed so familiar between Bon Bon and her conspirators, but when I did I grinned wide. I rather enjoyed that show, it brought me a whole lot of smiles.)

"Bad pony. No industrial espionage."

Best line in the whole thing.

Neither rain nor sleet nor Hanna-Barbera-grade shenanigans will stay these messengers from their daily rounds.

Derpy can be surprisingly terrifying, especially with that constant happy grin. *shudders*

When I read this story, the nostalgia didn't just hit me... It performed the Cheap Fighting Combo on me!

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