Tainted Love: A Twysalis Prompt Tag Collab

by Foals Errand

Duck by bobbananaville (Funny!)

by bobbananaville

“Rainbow Dash!” A ‘nonchalant’-looking (by which I mean, barely capable of breathing, she’s trying so hard not to laugh) Rainbow Dash looks down at me from her cloud. “Did you-”

“Oh, hey Twilight!” she says. The pegasus snickers. “How are you doing?”

“Don’t act innocent, Rainbow,” I growl, “Get down here right now!”

There is a pause. She’s probably weighing her options. She might have a checklist pertaining to whether a situation is of acceptable risk, if she’s been listening to my lectures - and she likely hasn’t.

Half a minute later, she finally descends from her cloud, wearing what she probably believes to be a composed face which is actually cleary five seconds from bursting into tears of laughter. “What’s u-” snicker, goes the insufferable prankster. “What’s up, Twi?”

Luckily for her, I’d taken the time she’d taken to compose herself to do the same. No longer am I afraid that I’ll do something drastic like pounce on her and rip out her jugular vein, or ban her from the library. No, I’ve calmed down, and can now ask in an orderly manner: “Did you tell Chrysalis that I was into ducks?”

“I don’t-” snicker, again, she keeps on snickering. “- I don’t know what you’re talking about. Why, is she-”

“Because that’s what she told me, when I finally asked her what she was doing. She’d turned into one and was squatting on the bed. She was wearing lipstick on her beak and shaking her backside and she was trying to quack alluringly, shut up Rainbow Dash!”

“Oh man, this is hilarious!” Finally, she drops her guise of innocence. “Did she really?”

“Yes! And she was so embarrassed and confused and she was still - Stop laughing!”

“Oh man, what about her feathers?!” I can make these words out between her giggles and gasps for air. “ Because I told her that you were really into preening ducks, and -”

“How could you - UGH!” I huff, and turn away. I don’t even know why I confronted her anyway. She won’t listen to anything I ask of her (well, not so long as it pertains to pranks), and I’m only fueling the flames by giving her details about her success. “I’m going to find a way to get back at you, Rainbow Dash,” I mutter loud enough for her to hear. “I’ll find some way.”

I make my way back to the library, plans forming in my mind and being discarded in split seconds, hundreds of -

“In all seriousness, though,” comes the voice again. still impetuous yet no longer quite as unbearable. “You have a good marefriend. I mean, she believed all of that stupid stuff I said -” urge to kill: rising - “but she became a duck anyway. She had no clue what she was doing, and she was embarrassing herself, but she did it for you. That’s saying something, isn’t it?”

I opt not to say anything and continue walking away. Nonetheless, the beginnings of a smile form on my face.

Comments

[Europa]

I cannot begin to imagine how humiliating that mustve been.

[The Literary Lord]

I can't believe that Chrysalis bought that!

[Foals Errand]

5493280
I checked it again just to make certain I did link the correct chapter.

[bobbananaville]

Whelp. I completely forgot that I wrote this.

[bobbananaville]

5493300 You linked to Tirek 2. You should have linked to Tirek 1.

[Snowdrifter]

Yep, this one has Rainbow...
(Wait for it)
...ducking the issue.

[Snowdrifter]

Yep, this one has Rainbow...
(Wait for it)
...ducking the issue.

[erictheblue]

the title made me think of an old "Beetle bailey" comic strip:
Zero: "goose, Sarge! GOOSE!"
Sarge: ?
FA-LOOM! (an artillery shell hits near Sarge, burning him badly)
Sarge: "did you, by chance, mean to say DUCK?"