Break Out

by Spirit Guide

Meet the In-Mares

"All rise! The honorable judge Doctor Whooves presiding!"

The bailiff's voice rang out as everypony rose from their seats. The judge emerged from a door at the back of the room and climbed up to the bench. Grabbing the gavel in his mouth, he slammed it down on the bench, its sharp crack echoing throughout the room as everypony sat down. Then the judge spoke.

"Very well, allons-y as I always say, let's go. Case No. S4E27, Bakers Dozen vs. the Princess and the Mailmare, is now in session." On one side of the room twelve ponies were seated, a mixture of mares and stallions, unicorns, pegasi and Earth ponies, each one wearing a different expression. On the other side were two mares, a grey pegasus and a purple alicorn, both looking quite unsurprised although the pegasus' eyes were rather perplexing-looking.

"May the representative of the Bakers Dozen please rise?" the judge called out.

A male stallion with a dark-chocolate coat and butterscotch mane stood up. His cutie mark was a fiery oven. This was Cocoa Flambé, the renowned dessert chef. "Your honor," the stallion said, "we of the Bakers Dozen are here to present before you evidence to prove our accusations of these ponies here." He gestured to the two mares. "We are accusing these ponies of committing one of the most despicable crimes in Equestrian history."

The spectators were leaning forward in their gallery seats, some of them mumbling to each other. What crime could the honorable Princess of Friendship and a simple mailmare have committed?

"Very well," the Doctor said, then to the bailiff, "State the charges."

The bailiff stood up and consulted his notes. The crowd was now full of nervous ponies, some biting their hooves, others holding their companions for comfort. The bailiff cleared his throat and called out.

"Stealing muffins."

Somepony cried. The murmuring continued and some ponies were looking rather frustrated. The bailiff, looked around, then glanced at his papers again.

"All the muffins."

The noise from the gallery was so loud now, the judge smashed the gavel down again. "Silence please!" he called, subduing the voices of the ponies. "That's quite enough of that. Is there any evidence?"

"Bring in the first witness," the bailiff called out.

The guards opened the side doors and a pink filly walked in. A diamond-studded tiara was perched on her head. She sauntered over to the stand and climbed onto the box behind it, which was put there so that she could actually see over the stand.

"State your name and occupation

"Diamond Tiara," the filly said haughtily. "I am a student of Miss Cheerilee at Ponyville School." She turned and glowered at the mailmare, who stared back at her with two unfocused golden eyes.

"Tell us what you saw," the Doctor said.

"Gladly. I was out walking with my cat Dazzle when I heard loud noises coming from the market. I went to check it out. When I got there, I saw these two," she pointed at the Princess and the mailmare, "running from the scene. Behind them, the entire marketplace was in shambles. The Bakers Dozen was holding a meeting that day and had brought their best work. Evidently, somepony decided to take advantage of that."

"SHUT UP!" A cyan pegasus shot out of the gallery towards the witness stand. "What do you think you're doing?!" Rainbow Dash demanded, hovering an inch from Diamond Tiara's nose. The proximity forced Diamond back to the edge of the box where she fell off and onto the floor.

Two security ponies hurried to the stand to restrain Rainbow. They dragged her into the corner, where she sat bucking and insulting like there was no tomorrow. The Doctor watched the spectacle with minor interest, ignoring the guards' trussing up Rainbow Dash and seating her beside them. "So Ms. Tiara, you say you saw the Princess and her companion fleeing the scene of the crime?" he inquired.

"Yes," Diamond replied, looking very pleased with Rainbow's reining-in. "I walked into the market and found the Bakers Dozen meet ruined, baked goods scattered over the street. One tray was left untouched aside from being empty: muffins." She pointed at the accused ponies. "Their saddlebags were laden with trays, each one bearing dozens of muffins. But by the time the officials caught up to them, the muffins were gone. Even the tray weren't found."

"Are you suggesting that the accused ate the muffins and the trays?" the Doctor asked humorously.

"Hmm, maybe," Diamond Tiara mused. "It really wouldn't be the first time that googly pegasus did something stupid."

In the corner, Rainbow Dash was seething but Applejack saw a look of anger flash across the judge's face, if only for a moment. That gave the farmpony hope as the court session continued. "Is that everything, Ms. Tiara?" the Doctor asked.

"Yes, it is. It should be sufficient for you."

The Doctor dismissed the filly with a hoof and she wen to go sit by her father Filthy Rich, who didn't look so content to be in the courtroom at all. The ponies were silent as the judge considered the evidence. "What have you to say about all this?" the Doctor asked, addressing the two accused mares.

The grey pegasus stood up. All eyes were on the mailmare, who has been known for her cute and friendly attitude, expert deliveries and love for muffins. But there was no way she would have stolen the baked goods, no matter how much she enjoyed them. Everypony in the gallery was sure of her innocence and, of course, that of the Princess's too.

"I confess," Derpy Hooves declared.

The temperature seemed to drop by several degrees. Mailmare Derpy Hooves, a thief? The truth was so hard to swallow, some ponies refused to believe it. Dinky almost jumped out of her seat towards her mother, but Sparkler held her back. Things only became worse when the other accused pony stood up, standing only slightly taller than Derpy.

"I confess as well," announced Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of friendship

The courtroom was thrown into a chaos bigger than Discord's. Ponies were shouting at the top of their lungs, the Bakers Dozen were appalled, Diamond Tiara's smug look caused Rainbow Dash's power to fly to its limits, allowing her to break her bonds, shove away the guards and charge at her, only to be held back by Applejack and Rarity . The Doctor watched impassively as the court descended into madness, the only silent ones himself and the accused mares: one a local royal, the other his personal assistant and friend. He looked at Derpy with confusion and questioning but the pegasus merely smiled up at him, her disoriented-looking eyes staring up at him.

With a heavy heart, the Doctor picked up the gavel and slammed it down on the bench once more, the crash drowned out by the ruckus of the public.

*

"After the judge managed to get control over the crowd, he sentenced us to imprisonment until next season."

"Whoa. Tough break, Princess Twilight."

"Oh, you don't need to call me 'Princess', Fuse. We're all convicts here."

Fuse-A-Lot scratched his mane in embarrassment. He'd been sent to prison for messing with the Manehatten power lines for a dare and several hundred bits. He'd never stopped regretting his actions until his new cellmates arrived. Twilight and Derpy had been a great comfort to him in jail and now he couldn't think of anywhere else that he would rather be, aside from home.

"Still, you must feel pretty bad. You lost everything that you had, your friends and your jobs, over a couple of muffins."

"A couple hundred muffins," Derpy corrected him.

"Yeah, so why'd you do it?" Fuse asked.

Twilight looked out through the bars of their cell. "It was for a good cause," she said mysteriously.

"You mean stuffing your bellies full for one afternoon," came a rude but humorous voice from the stallion next door. Ascendio Interrupt had flown into a tropical aviary and caused countless exotic birds to shoot over the visiting crowds, which No. 2'd on everypony. It wouldn't have been so bad if a number of high-class froufrou Canterlot ponies hadn't been at the aviary at the time and were quite disappointed if not overly repulsed by the bird droppings coating their very expensive outfits. After a few posh angry complaints, Ascendio was locked up. He was unusually cheery for a pony behind bars with several weeks to serve.

"We didn't stuff our bellies, Ascendio," Twilight told the pegasus.

"Although I did get mine rubbed," Derpy admitted to Fuse.

"By who?" he asked, wondering why Derpy would make such a big deal out of it. "Was it the Doctor?"

"No. It was....."

"Was what?" Ascendio inquired, feigning interest.

"I'm sorry Fuse, but I can't tell you," Derpy informed with an apologetic smile.

Ascendio turned over and faced the wall. "Next thing you'll know, she'll be telling you that they didn't eat all those muffins."

"We didn't," Twilight announced plainly.

This came as a bit of a blow to both the other prisoners. "Then where are they?" Fuse asked, his mind reeling.

Twilight and Derpy exchanged looks. They couldn't just tell anypony what they did with those muffins. For starters, nopony would even believe them. They'd been asked not to tell, they'd given their word and they were going to keep it..... Then again, they were in deep trouble. Stealing muffins from the Baker's Dozen was wrong, even if they did charge outrageously for their goods. But it was for a good cause and both Twilight and Derpy believed what they did was the right thing, no matter what the cost.

"Sorry Fuse, but we can't tell you," Derpy explained.

"What we can tell you," Twilight said suddenly, remembering something important, "is that not only do we not have the muffins, we gave them away."

"Gave them away?" Fuse repeated. "To who?"

The Princess of Friendship looked up at the moon hovering in the night sky. "I have a feeling all of Equestria will soon know who."

*

"Ack, this stinks!"

"Ah can't believe that no-good Diamond Tiara did that!"

Everypony was at Sweet Apple Acres, discussing the day's events. Rainbow Dash and Applejack were pacing back and forth, ranting about everything that went wrong and searching for things that could have done to change the situation. Spike, Fluttershy, Rarity and Pinkie Pie were watching them with decreasing interest. Twilight in jail and Derpy with her. The facts were undeniable yet they all refused to believe they were at fault.

"Twilight didn't steal those muffins," Spike said stubbornly. "And neither did Derpy."

"There was a whole crowd of witnesses, Spikey-wikey," Rarity told him sadly. "There was too much evidence against them."

"What are we going to do now?" Fluttershy asked. "Twilight has her royal duties and Derpy has her own job. What were they thinking, sentencing them to time in prison?"

"I think I might know!" Pinkie said brightly.

Everyone perked up at this. "Really Pinkie?" Spike wondered desperately. "What? What?"

"Oh, not me, Spike, but someone else probably has a shrewd idea."

"Who?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"Me," a voice said into her ear, causing the pegasus to jump.

Fluttershy immediately threw her hooves up and smiled warmly. "Discord!"

The draconequus grinned unsurely as Fluttershy hugged him, but he returned the gesture. "I heard about the court session and I must say I'm sorry I wasn't there."

"Why?" Rarity wondered curiously. "So you could throw water balloons at the bailiff?"

"Oh, that's a good idea!" Discord said brightly. "I never really liked that pony anyway. But no, I had other things on my mind."

"Like what? Come on, Discord. Please!" Spike gripped the draconequus' lion paw.

Discord lifted Spike and looked at him with his mismatched eyes. "My my my, you've gotten a little frantic, haven't you?" he said in a pitiful tone, daintily pinching Spike's cheek. "Feeling lost and forlorn without your princess around?"

"YES!" they all shouted, surprising Discord.

"Ah," he exclaimed, feeling just a bit ashamed. "I see."

"So what is it, Discord?" Rainbow asked. "What really happened with those muffins?"

"Oh, isn't it obvious? And you were all connected long before I even appeared."

Spike and the ponies just stared. "Huh?"

"Come now, you know. Our other friends. You've all got some. Especially you, Rainbow Dash."

Rainbow Dash glanced at her friends, a look of realization crossing her face. "Oh. Those friends. You mean that's why they stole all those muffins?" she asked Discord.

"I'm quite certain. They were in need of some.... special muffins."

"And they don't get any specialer than Equestrian muffins!" Pinkie announced.

"Lemme get this straight," Applejack said. "Our friends went and asked Twilight an' Derpy to fetch them some muffins, but they got caught. Why didn' they just come and buy the muffins themselves?"

"There could be multiple reasons," Discord mused and counted them off on his claws. "The don't have the right currency, they'd scary everypony within a hundred miles, the portal might be closed. It could be anything. Oh, by the way," he added, "we're all invited to their picnic." He snapped his tail and nine cards appeared out of thin air.

"Oh, sweet!" Rainbow Dash cheered, swooping in and grabbing her invitation.

"I heard that it's going to be as big as the Grand Galloping Gala," Rarity revealed. "Although the Gala itself was rather disappointing."

"Don' dwell on it too much, Rarity," Applejack told her. "Our friends wouldn't throw a fiasco."

Spike was holding three invitations. "There's one for Twilight and one for Derpy here too," he said sadly. "Do they know that they won't be able to come?"

"Hmm." Discord leaned back on the air and stroked his goatee. "I may have mentioned a few things to them. Then again, they always seem to know what's going on in Equestria."

"So they do know what happened?" Fluttershy asked.

Discord smiled and wrapped a paw around the pegasus. "Yes Fluttershy, they know. In fact, not only do they know, they're coming to do something about it."

"Didn't you say that they couldn't come here?" Rainbow Dash inquired.

"I never said that," the draconequues corrected. "I only said that it might be a factor to their not getting the muffins themselves." Discord peeled back the fur on his right arm and checked the time. "They should be here in an hour. I think we should go wait to welcome back Twilight and Derpy when they're free."

"But how will our friends bust 'em out?" Applejack asked. "The prison's like a rat trap and is crawling with guards."

"Oh, don't worry about them, dear Applejack," Discord assured, tugging a Welcome Back sign out of a bush. "Everything will be just fine."

Author's Note:

This was supposed to be the funny part, the next one's just a tad more serious