I try to write the best I can. Feel free to leave me a comment (I prefer positive ones but any feedback is better than none at all). I appreciate stories that are well written and skillfully executed.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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yeeeeees i cant wait for more lolol
Then just wait till tomorrow. :) Do you think you can do that? I know it's hard, but hold on brother.
FINALLY!!!!!! IT CONTINUES!!!!!!!!
Yaaay. Thank you, Truthseeker!!
No problem bros!
OMG!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!! It is finaly here! I am so happy!
Discord and humans taking lessons from each other? This can only end in hilarity.
Can't wait to see what happens next!
ALL MY YES!!!
Saw 2 little errors in chapter 1
Should be conscience.
Thank you! All done with those corrections. Hehehe DERP!
Umm... Plothole... When did the transformation happen? Did I just forget the transfusion? How did they get along at the start? All of these questions need to be answered.
4862537 Read The Unity Pact. It is all covered in there.
4855410 And hysteria! MASS hysteria!!
Well there goes all my respect for Luna. Cadance is now our last hope.
4864794 bit of an extreme reaction sir. Keep in mind, Luna is still not in sync with modern beliefs and practices.
4865701
After the events of the first story, she should know, by now, that threatening the humans, because they might do something dangerous, is a self fulfilling prophecy.
Also her struggle with modernity is irrelevant. She's willfully ignoring the reactions of the ponies right in front of her, as well as all the fears the humans have expressed to her, in the past.
4865838 Isn't foolhardy overconfidence a wonderful thing? :)=
The immortal thinks the mortals are overreacting to a device she remembers fondly, not as a slaver's tool but a safety measure that was often employed (always temporarily) during her time.
4864794 Tell me, friend; What goes hand-in-hand with Love? MADNESS.
were
but
And Brinsin totally needs a cape.
4869728 Ooh! Thanks, I'll fix that right away.
more
4870262 MORE?! As if TWO chapters in one day isn't enough? . . . I'll see what I can do.
4870358
No, no... You're supposed to respond like so:
[Youtube=sZrgxHvNNUc]
HA!! Teach you to underestimate a human
More please:-)
Yes! Human magic at last! Ok, so flight is possible but requires conscious thought to control. Heh, I nearly bust my gut when he shocked the instructor with static electricity. XD
All in all, I love the series and I just can't put it down. Well done. I look forward to reading more soon.
ooooh, boy this will back-fire hilariously on Luna.
Bloody hilariously.
their powerful
Oh, so that's how it is.
The second you find someone who actually gives the human an equal footing, you ponies ... ummm ... I don't actually know what is about to happen, but I'm sure that it is going to piss me off.
So write faster or something.
By the way Luna has to understand that this massive violation of trust is going to have major backlash. I mean she abducted one off the human leaders and all.
Oh, and I swear to God, if they pull some permanent magical surpression bullshit, I will reach into this story and punch Luna and Celestia in the taint.
4880649 Maybe . . .
4880727 It's not the taint, on any female it's called the perineum.
I . . . guess I should be glad that my writing is so emotionally involving for my readers. Do not worry, all will be rectified.
Dammit, Moon Horse. This is why you get so few episodes.
4880995 . . . . . . . . . Moon Horse . . . . . . . . . . oooookayyyyy . . . . . . . . . . . . *snicker*
Teleportation... I don't like this... Even with a powerful caster there wouldn't be a need to pull something like this unless she's honestly scared. No, definitely no reason was given here but there must be one, especially since Celestia signed off on the use of these collars.
Not bad, although I did notice a grammar error I'm the second to last paragraph here:
The large, bold and underlined word should just be the letter "a". I imagine this was an editing mistake is all but it's best to keep you on your toes. Good job and keep up the good work.
4882271 Thanks for letting me know about the oops I made. I'll fix that right away.
IT'S OUT! WHOOO!
So Sunbutt remains calm when she learns one of the humans is a 10, on the magic scale, but panics when she finds out the 10 is Vacca?
Chris isn't that bad, Queeny.
Oooooooh, I can't wait for Luna to find out that the collar is gone.
Yaaaay, no genocide due to a misunderstanding again (yet).
mayhaps Discord gets to train Chris?
glass jar willed with dirt
Filled
didn't stick her her quills
Out
while Chris pet her
Petted
made his way to the armorie.
armoire
You know... I just realized Vacca, his name means "cow". I'm in the Rio Grande Valley and I didn't pick that up until right now? I'm slipping in my old age.
In any case, the humans' reaction is not unfounded; she broke her word. Moreover, she greatly underestimated the human will to be free. Chris definitely knows how to think on his feet despite being a total goof.
Well done. You kept me hooked and engaged even after the previous chapter and I could not sleep well until this chapter was released.
what
4902086 What's wrong?
do they have technology the humans and how many are pregnant
The Humans have no technology, the end piece was a flashback to Earth. Funny how I never specified how many women were pregnant, did I?
When Sunbutt started laughing, I was afraid Chris had accidentally proposed marriage, or something.
Was hoping for Discord to be his new tutor, though.
Bring back the pony who headbutts trees.
No errors found.
I thought Celestia had erased her copy of Artex's personal memories and just retained general human knowledge. Mistake?
4902486 Not quite. Celestia remembers things about people he knew and about history. His more intimate memories are the ones she erased. For example, she would know that Kolo was a gentle giant, but she would have no idea what Artex' favorite food was.
I completely forgot to read this story after I finished with the other one more than a month ago, it's going excellently.