Ponies Protecting Ponies

by Venates

Chapter One: The Summer Sun Celebration

Bon Bon glared at the bright blue sky as though it were the reason she rarely slept.

"Giving clouds the stink eye won't make a chariot move any faster, you know," a yellow pony with a bouncing orange mane said to her.

"Can it, Top."

Carrot Top chuckled. "You are going to have a hard time getting your agents to like you as chief handler with that sort of attitude."

Bon Bon moved her dagger eyes from the sky to the pony next to her. "It is not my intent to have my agents like me, Top," she said. "All I need is for each one to do their job. I am not here to make friends."

"I'll send out a memo," said Carrot with a roll of her eyes.

Bon Bon looked back towards the clouds gently drifting above them. She muttered, "You and I both know how dangerous it is to get close to somepony in a job like ours."

Carrot Top gave no response.

"There," declared Bon Bon. "That's them."

"Are you sure?"

"We don't have any other chariots scheduled for today."

As the two mares watched, a golden chariot pulled by two white pegasi descended and landed softly next to them. Two more mares — unicorns, in fact — disembarked, and both the chariot and the stallions pulling it disappeared back into the clouds.

"You're late," Bon Bon said to the two newcomers.

The mint-green one was the first to speak. "Yeah, well, we had a lot of questions and about four seconds to get a fraction of them answered," she replied.

Bon Bon snorted. "I would have given you two."

"She's usually not that generous," Carrot Top whispered to the pink unicorn next to her, who stifled a giggle.

Bon Bon ignored this and gave a motion for the three mares around her to follow. The four ponies began walking with Bon Bon's blue-and-pink-striped mane at the front.

"So: where is Sparkle?" the green unicorn asked. "I'm sure you're aware that the two of us are here to keep an eye on her."

"You should have considered that before you decided to be late," stated Bon Bon. The green unicorn opened her mouth to give a hot retort, but Bon Bon cut her off. "We already have an agent tailing her. She'll remain on duty until the two of you have been familiarized with our headquarters and the rest of our staff."

"Fine," the unicorn grunted. She casually observed a few uninteresting buildings as they walked past them. Once she got bored of this, she asked, "Well, while we're just trotting along here, could we at least know more about the mission? Why the move to Ponyville and whatnot? I think it's only fair."

"Fair is having a job, Miss...?"

"Heartstrings," the green unicorn said. "Lyra Heartstrings."

"Well, Heartstrings," Bon Bon said with as much venom as one word could be laced with, "there will be plenty of time for intel when we're not surrounded by non-agency citizens."

Lyra blinked, but otherwise took Bon Bon's ice in stride. She turned to Carrot Top and asked, "Is she always this welcoming?"

Carrot chuckled. "She's just a little on-edge is all. The Ponyville branch doesn't usually see much activity. She's still new in the handler position here, and hopes to run a tight ship; a couple of unknown faces arriving a few minutes late is not exactly on her list of acceptable things."

"It was more than 'a few minutes', thank you," Bon Bon said over her shoulder. "Sparkle beat you here by almost an hour. Tell me: how did you expect to 'keep an eye on her' while airborne in the middle of nowhere?"

"I'll have to confer with the Cloudsdale branch and get back to you," Lyra said with a smirk.

Bon Bon stopped in her tracks and turned to give Lyra the full brunt of her fed-up expression. "Look, I'm not big on snarky ponies—"

"No kiddin'."

"—And I will NOT tolerate it so long as I'm your handler," Bon Bon finished. "Is that understood?"

Lyra gave a half-hearted salute. "Put a lid on the snark; got it." Bon Bon glared for just a second longer before she resumed walking.

"Who is she replacing as handler, anyway?" the pink mare asked.

"Me, actually," Carrot Top said. She turned to look at the unicorn. "Amethyst, right?"

"Err, yeah!" said the pony addressed.

"Right, so you're the new recruit then. I read your file," Carrot explained in response to a confused look on Amethyst's face. She then called to the pony at the front of the pack, "Like a good chief handler is supposed to do!" A low growl came from Bon Bon's mouth. The three mares behind her snickered.

"So why are you quitting?" Amethyst asked Carrot.

"I wouldn't necessarily say 'quitting'," Carrot admitted, "but I did feel that it was somepony else's turn to take reign."

"That's a shame," said Lyra, her attention back on the unexciting structures around her. "Sounds like you would have been more fun."

"Oh, I'm not so sure about that," Carrot answered. She closed her eyes and threw her bouncing orange mane back. "The glorious and beautiful yellow mare you see before you is what happens when all the stress of a position like that is put onto another pony's back."

Amethyst giggled. Lyra looked at the back of Bon Bon's head and said, "So just so I'm clear: we're taking orders from fussy britches up there?"

Carrot Top stifled a chuckle and nodded to Lyra. Bon Bon's neck turned red.

"So if you're not in charge anymore, what do you do now?" asked Amethyst.

Carrot Top gave her mane one last fluff. "Like I said earlier, things are pretty quiet around here, so it's mostly advising and helping Bon Bon get used to her new post," she stated. "You know, when she decides to listen to me." Carrot Top waited for a response, but when Bon Bon didn't offer one, Carrot continued, "And I'm still young, so I can always lend a hoof here and there on a mission if we really need it."

"Any chance you'd consider retaking your position?" Lyra asked snarkily.

"Quiet, you lot," Bon Bon snapped to the ponies behind her. "We're here."

The building in front of them was much taller and more decorated than those around it. Its circular shape with custom-designed windows and flags waving at the top suggested an air of governance.

"Town Hall?" asked Lyra. "You guys set up base here? Wouldn't you want something more covert?"

"Again, Ponyville doesn't see much action," Carrot began. "It's very rare that anypony needs to see the mayor about any concerning matters." The four mares entered the building and found themselves in a beautifully decorated foyer. At the front stood a unicorn mare busily opening and going through boxes of brightly colored ribbons. "Bathroom?" Carrot called out to her.

"Yes, yes, right over there to your left," the mare called back. Then, to herself, "Now the streamers: pink or blue? They simply must match the—"

"That's Rarity," Carrot said. Then, with a chuckle, "Too busy with her work to notice anything, that one."

"I'm starting to feel like the agency relies too much on that sort of thing," grumbled Amethyst to nopony in particular.

Once the bathroom door closed behind them, Bon Bon commanded,"All right, ladies, pick a stall."

Amethyst tilted her head. "And what do we—?"

"Lift the seat on the toilet."

"...Pardon?"

Bon Bon did not answer again; she had already closed the door to her own stall. Carrot Top chuckled as she entered one herself. Amethyst followed suit into an unoccupied stall and stared at the porcelain bowl in front of her. Then, not knowing what else to do, she lifted the seat up. At first it just sat there, but then the toilet slid quietly into the wall behind it to reveal a platform.

"This is how you get into your headquarters?" asked Amethyst incredulously.

"Well, it is the girls' room!" she heard Carrot Top answer. "It's not like any boys will be in here lifting the seats!"

"Yeah, but — That's not what — What if — But that doesn't — What?"

"Shut up and ride the lift down, Star," came Lyra's voice.

Amethyst got onto the platform that was hidden underneath her stall's toilet and pressed a green button on its edge. In an instant the platform began its descent.

---

Ponyville HQ was less impressive than its sister in Canterlot. Apart from the smaller space and somewhat outdated-looking technology, it just didn't have the same hustle and bustle that both the Canterlotian branch and its city had.

"This is our control room," Bon Bon said after all four lifts came to a stop. "It's not much, but we do have enough here to monitor the town, a nearby farm, the dam, and various parts of the forest to the south."

"You're monitoring the forest?" Lyra asked. "Are you afraid of a squirrel invasion?"

Bon Bon didn't answer. "Most time not spent in the field will be spent here gathering intel and receiving new assignments," she explained. "Now if you'll come with me this way, I'll show you the equipment room and our R&D lab. Hooves!"

"Yes, ma'am!" A tan stallion with a windswept brown mane stumbled to his hooves before giving an awkward salute to Bon Bon. She and the two unicorns made their way into a small room filled with blinking lights and a quiet buzzing.

Bon Bon said, "Doctor, these are the Canterlot transfers, Agents Lyra Heartstrings and Amethyst..."

"Star," the pink unicorn finished for her.

"Right, yes, Amethyst Star," Bon Bon finished with a nod.

"Oh! Well! How do you do, ladies?" the stallion asked with a sincere grin.

Looking all around the lab, Lyra took a few steps forward. "So what are you R-ing and D-ing in here, Doc?"

"Oh!" The scientist stumbled on his hooves once again and excitedly ran to some nearby equipment. "I'm actually just putting the finishing touches on this one! See, it's a powerful biological purging device that uses crystalline lenses to—"

"Wait." Lyra raised a hoof to silence the stallion. "Are you about to tell me this thing cures the common cold?"

"A rather uncommon one, actually!" Hooves corrected. "Thus far, it's only ever ailed one pony in known existence!"

"Tax money well spent, I see," said Lyra with a roll of her eyes.

"Yes!" Hooves said with a huge smile. "Princess Celestia has—"

"That's enough, Doctor, thank you," Bon Bon said. She turned to the pair of unicorns. "We better check in on Agent Doo. She's the operative I have on Sparkle detail while you two are getting briefed."

The mares left the lone stallion to his research. As soon as their backs were turned to him, Hooves began muttering to himself. "Now, white crystalline has already proved to be too pure in the process, so perhaps a multicolor..."

Bon Bon rejoined Carrot Top in the control room, hit a switch, and a few monitors around the mares blipped into life. "Agent Doo, report."

A cheery yet bored voice greeted them. "Hey, Bon. Nothing too terribly exciting happening at the moment. Sparkle is making rounds right now following an agenda that Princess Celestia gave her. She's on her way back from the farm, so I imagine that she'll be occupied for an hour or two yet."

"Thank you, Doo" replied Bon Bon. "I'll be getting the transfers up to speed. Let me know if anything changes."

"Will do. Doo out."

Lyra snickered.

"What?" Bon Bon asked with an angry overtone.

The green unicorn composed herself. "She said... Oh, seriously, am I the only one who caught that?"

The others looked at her inquisitively.

"Never mind," said Lyra. "So, if I heard you right, we're finally going to start getting some answers?"

Bon Bon shuffled herself into a more upright position. "Considering your assignment to this mission, I can't imagine that being entirely out of the question."

"Very good, Bon!" Carrot Top said in a higher voice than normal. "Agents are so much more willing to cooperate when they understand why they're doing what they're doing!"

"Stow it, Top. Now then," Bon Bon turned to the two unicorns. "Where to begin?"

"For starters: why Ponyville of all places?" asked Lyra.

"And what about the keyphrase 'Elements of Harmony'?" Amethyst added. The others all turned to look at her. "What? I think that's a valid question."

"I suppose I can answer both of those with a story," Bon Bon said. Amethyst leaned forward. Lyra rolled her eyes. Carrot Top looked between the two of them with a sly smile.

Bon Bon continued, "Are either of you two familiar with the Mare in the Moon?"

"Not overly, but I hear she's a hoot," Lyra said. Bon Bon glared at her. "Oh, right, sorry about the snark."

"She's part of a legend," Amethyst said. She caught the attention of the other ponies again.

"'Legend' may not exactly be the right word," Bon Bon told her. "History tells us that Princess Celestia actually sealed the being within the moon using the 'Elements of Harmony' — a metaphor for her power, I believe — and that this 'Nightmare Moon' is set to return. Tonight."

Lyra snickered. "You and I had very different history classes," she told Bon Bon.

"I'm sure of it," Bon Bon retorted without so much as a giggle. "Believe it or not, our agency was founded exactly one thousand years ago as a direct result of that incursion."

"That was a choice, right?" Lyra asked. "You say I can choose not to believe it?"

Bon Bon clenched her teeth before continuing. "You see, Agent, that when Princess Celestia formed this company, she instilled in it the number one rule that we still hold to this day: everypony is a citizen who must be protected."

"So why wasn't all that on the first quiz?" Amethyst asked Lyra.

"This included," Bon Bon continued over the interruption, "the sister who tried to usurp her. Celestia chose to banish Nightmare Moon over taking a life. Interestingly, years of research eventually showed that this sister was corrupted by a dark moon-based life-form, but—"

"Can we skip the fairy tale nonsense and get to the bits that actually matter?" asked Lyra.

Bon Bon snorted. "Let's just say there's a reason Princess Celestia picked Ponyville of all places for Twilight Sparkle and, by extension, the two of you. The forest at the edge of town contains the old ruins that she and her sister shared when a castle still stood there, as well as the site of Nightmare Moon's defeat. As such, this is no doubt the first place Nightmare Moon is set to seek out revenge. Therefore, as the only being capable of stopping her, Princess Celestia decided to hold the Summer Sun Celebration here so as to not alarm the common folk with her sudden presence. Rather, she is expected."

Lyra's eyes rolled upwards. "Okay... But why bring Sparkle here?"

"I know you're already aware of her importance to the princess," Bon Bon said, "so obviously her safety is a high priority. In case Nightmare Moon does attack, Twilight Sparkle will be safest where the princess can reach her easily."

"That doesn't make sense," Amethyst stated. The others all turned to look at her again. She could feel sweat on her neck, but her voice didn't carry any such nervousness. "If Celestia wants to keep Twilight safe, why bring her to the one place she knows this 'Nightmare Moon' is going to attack?"

"Princess Celestia, Star," Bon Bon corrected. "And because she doesn't know that." Bon Bon paced as she spoke. "After the destruction of their castle here, Princess Celestia built Canterlot up in the mountains. If Nightmare Moon were to receive this information, she might alter her attack and go there first. With the princess here instead, the city — and Twilight Sparkle — would be completely vulnerable."

"What, and we can't protect her there on our own?" Lyra asked.

"No. You can't." Bon Bon stopped her pacing to stare right into Lyra's eyes. "No amount of training could prepare you for what this monster can do. We're talking about a pony who was once a princess herself, now infused with evil incarnate." Lyra shifted uncomfortably. "That aside," Bon Bon continued, "having a little extra muscle on your part does help put the princess's mind at ease here."

"Two agents?" scoffed Lyra. "That's your idea of 'muscle' against a thousand-year-old alicorn with anger management problems?"

"Not really," Bon Bon said. "I don't think we need either of you. But, much like Sparkle's protection, these orders come from the princess herself."

"Flattering," Lyra said with a sneer.

Just then a familiar voice buzzed in their earpieces. <This is Agent Doo. Twilight Sparkle is right over your heads speaking to Rarity in the foyer. If you plan on leaving at any point, I suggest giving it a minute or two.>

"Copy," said Bon Bon. "Any idea of her next target?"

<I can see her checklist from here,> Agent Doo said. <Looks complete, from what I can tell. Intel says that she's staying at the library; I'd imagine that's her next stop.>

"Copy." Bon Bon turned to the two unicorns. "Alright, once we get the all clear, I want you two topside doing what you're supposed to be doing, and give Doo a break. She can show you the best vantage points for the library, and—"

<Actually, that probably won't be necessary,> Doo said in their earpieces. <I can see Pinkie Pie hauling a metric ton of balloons in that direction, and a parade of ponies following her to boot.>

"That frantic little—" Bon Bon put a hoof to her head. "Okay. New plan. Doo, if the library is indeed Sparkle's next stop, I want you to head that way. Agents Heartstrings and Star will meet you inside."

<Copy. Over and out.>

Bon Bon grumbled and wandered off in another direction, one that presumably led to a private office.

Lyra turned to Carrot Top. "What's got her bun in a knot?"

"Well, around here 'PPP' doesn't mean 'Ponies Protecting Ponies'," Carrot Top explained. The two unicorns looked at one another, then back to Carrot Top, who continued, "You two are about to go to a Pinkie Pie Party."

---

"SURPRIIIIIIIIISE!"

Ponyville's library was filled to its brim with almost every pony in the town present. At the center of the mass was the unicorn renting out the space for the night, Twilight Sparkle, and next to her bounced the excitable namesake of the 'Pinkie Pie Party'.

"Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie, and I threw this party just for you!"

"She certainly does like meeting new ponies, doesn't she?" chuckled Lyra.

Amethyst frowned. "All this just because Twilight is a new face in town? Why don't we get a party?"

"A:" Lyra began, "we're supposed to be covert, which means blending into the background, not standing out as guests of honor."

"Ah. Right."

"And B:" continued Lyra, "there's like a dozen ponies in this town that look a lot like us. Which, although weird, does help us to blend in a little."

Amethyst nodded. "Yeah, I suppose that's true."

"Heartstrings? Star?"

Both ponies turned to see a grey pegasus approaching them. Her two golden eyes were not quite aligned, yet they were both fixed on either pony addressed.

"That's us," Lyra said. She moved one hoof between her and Amethyst and clarified, "Heartstrings, Star. I take it you're Agent Doo?"

"That's me," the pegasus confirmed with a salute. "Agent Derpy Doo, at your service."

"Hey!" Amethyst hissed, "We're surrounded by civilians! You guys really shouldn't refer to somepony as an 'agent' out loud like that!"

"It's fine, really," Doo said. "It's usually hard to hear much of anything in one of Pinkie Pie's parties."

"Again: too much trust in ponies being distracted," grumbled Amethyst.

Derpy tilted her head. "What?"

"Don't mind her," Lyra said with a wave. "You've got some information for us?"

The pegasus shrugged. "Not much," Derpy admitted. "Twilight just kind of went about town and made some friends. Should make the princess happy."

"She's really that concerned about Sparkle's social life, eh?" Lyra asked.

"Yes and no," said Derpy. "Our intel doesn't offer much beyond the wish being relayed to Twilight in a letter penned by the princess herself."

"Well, the way I see it, 'friends' will just make things harder for us." Lyra reached out to a nearby refreshments table and grabbed a cup for punch. When she made for a bottle to fill it with, Derpy put a hoof over the glass and shook her head.

"Watch the labels on these things," Derpy warned as one of her eyes wandered to a different part of the room. "You'll be in worse condition for the night if you don't."

Lyra stared at the pegasus for a beat before giving the bottle a similar stare. She put the bottle back, grabbed a different one, and left to wander the building. With her absence, Amethyst approached her new ally.

"What's up, Agent Star?" Derpy asked.

"Amethyst is fine, really," the pink unicorn stated. "And what—"

A high-pitched whistle interrupted the conversation; both mares turned just in time to see a blur of violet rush up a set of stairs. A small purple dragon approached the beverage table and picked up the bottle that Lyra left behind. "Hot sauce..."

Derpy chuckled, but Amethyst looked worried. "Was that Twilight?" she asked. "Should we go after her?"

"Nah, she's fine," Derpy replied. "The upper level doesn't lead anywhere, and I doubt she's going to be jumping out of a window any time soon."

Amethyst watched as Lyra approached and settled near the staircase. From there she eyed the party guests warily. "If you say so," Amethyst said.

"Now," Derpy began, "were you going to ask me something?"

"Oh! Yes! Sorry..." Amethyst blushed. "I was going to ask what you usually do when you're not tailing VIPs for Lyra and me."

"Actually, nothing all that different," Derpy said. "I transferred from the Cloudsdale branch a while back. Ponyville staff was lacking, and being primarily an earth pony town at the time, they struggled with pegasus recruitment. I got sent in to be the 'eye in the sky' around here. As you can see, though, Ponyville has become much more of a melting pot since then. Still, you two unicorns are the first real diversity this branch has seen in quite a while."

Amethyst coughed and averted her gaze. "So uh... uh..." She swallowed. "'Eye in the sky': does that mean... you know... just one?" Amethyst looked up with her two violet eyes to meet a single yellow one. The other eye switched which part of the room it was observing.

"No. Both," Derpy stated. "Look, I'm going to be blunt here, because this comes up a lot and I'd rather you not just assume things: I work in recon. My specialty is seeing everything. I even trained myself to be able to look in two different directions at the same time and still make out everything I see clear as day. This is an advantage — not a handicap. Understood?"

Amethyst gulped. "Yes, ma'am."

"Hey," soothed Derpy, putting a hoof on Amethyst's shoulder, "no need for any 'yes, ma'am' stuff here, okay?" Amethyst swallowed and nodded. Derpy removed her hoof and continued, "I'm sorry, it's just a bit of a sore point for me is all. Fact is, I have to keep my ability among the citizens a secret. I just let them think that I have a defect, and... it stings sometimes. You know: not being able to tell the truth. Taking the ridicule and knowing that I can't change just to make somepony happy."

"I'm..." Amethyst swallowed again. "I'm sorry to hear that. Truly. I mean, if I—"

Derpy waved away the rest of Amethyst's sentence. "Don't worry about it, alright?" She then tilted her head to the side as both eyes faced forward. "It's all just part of the job. We make sacrifices. And we do it to protect the ones we love, right?"

"And the ones we've yet to love," Amethyst said with a smile.

Derpy tilted her head a little more, but before she could respond, her left eye swiveled and focused on a point behind Amethyst. In that moment, Lyra's voice came from the same direction.

"This is making me uncomfortable," Lyra said. She came into view and addressed her partners face-to-face. "This many ponies in one place, and something bad is bound to happen."

"Relax, Heartstrings," Derpy said. "These parties happen almost every week, and are always completely under control. She may not seem like it, but Pinkie knows how to have a good time without police and insurance agencies getting involved."

"It's not like I'm worried about a cow kicking a lamp," Lyra began.

"They're usually not invited," Derpy interjected.

Lyra leered at Derpy before continuing. "It's just a lot to keep an eye on is all."

Both Derpy and Amethyst chuckled. The pegasus replied, "Don't worry, I've been on security detail on much bigger gigs than this."

Lyra snorted. "Whatever. Look, I'm going to check in with HQ. Stepping outside for a bit."

Once Lyra was safely out of earshot, Derpy turned to address Amethyst. "Is she always such a stick in the mud?"

"Actually, it's pretty rare," Amethyst replied. "I think she just gets this way when she feels like somepony has to take charge. Otherwise she's pretty laid back."

Derpy hummed. "Well, I'm sure once we're all back at HQ and have Bon Bon breathing down our necks, we'll feel plenty fine about cracking a joke or two here and there."

Amethyst smiled. "I can confirm this," she said.

The party continued in an otherwise uneventful fashion. Games kept all the party guests entertained well into the night, and some pony or another downed the rest of the refreshments. As the hour continued to become more advanced, Amethyst started to worry about just how late the town's residents planned on staying in the library.

"Don't ponies sleep around here?" she asked.

"You're kidding, right?" replied Derpy. "It's the Summer Sun Celebration! You're supposed to stay up all night partying."

"Really?" Amethyst rubbed her chin. "I never knew that. Makes sense though."

"Has your town never had a Summer Sun Celebration before?" asked Derpy.

"I grew up in Canterlot, so, yes, of course," Amethyst said with a giggle. "But I was always out of town for one reason or another. Canterlot hosted it last year, but that was after my training started... I didn't see much sun at all for the first few months." Amethyst picked an empty bottle from the floor and set it neatly on a nearby table.

"Oh yeah, I remember the weeding-out process," Derpy said, picking up a bottle herself. "Who'da thought working underground would be so literal?" Both ponies laughed. "I mean, I'm sure it wasn't fun all-around, but you have no idea what it's like for a pegasus not to fly in the open air for so long."

Amethyst chuckled. "Hey, we managed."

Derpy smiled in return. "That we did."

Lyra chose that moment to reenter both the building and the conversation. "Hey, you two know much about the Summer Sun Celebration in this town?"

"Yeah!" said Amethyst energetically, turning towards her. "It's where ponies stay up all night, and—"

"I know about the holiday, kid," Lyra said, deadpan. "I mean our part in it."

"Oh..." Amethyst's enthusiasm faded. "Then no."

"We're helping with the security detail," Derpy explained. She bounced a balloon with one of her wings. "Both Twilight and the princess will be there, so between that and the big security threat we may have, we need all hooves on deck."

"Right, the fairy tale moon mistress," Lyra said sarcastically. "I nearly forgot about her."

Derpy squinted at Lyra with one eye. "Laugh if you want, Heartstrings, but I for one plan on listening to any order given by Princess Celestia herself."

"Oh, so I do have your permission to laugh then?" asked Lyra. "I just want to make sure."

The two mares glared as Amethyst looked between them. Unsure in her words, she began, "Um, guys, maybe we should—"

"Hey! So is it my turn?" The small purple dragon from before bounded down the stairs while lifting a lamp shade over his eyes. A few party guests near a poster of a tailless pony turned at the sound of his voice.

"Actually, given the time, we best be headin' fer Town Hall right about now," said an orange earth pony wearing a Stetson.

"Aw, really?" The dragon sounded hurt.

"Well, we wouldn't want to be late, would we?" asked the white unicorn who was decorating Town Hall. When the tiny dragon looked down at his feet, Rarity continued, "We can play again before you and Twilight go back to Canterlot. How does that sound?" The dragon looked up shyly and nodded. Rarity then looked to the party master, Pinkie Pie, who also nodded. "Then it's settled. Now, Spike, could you be a dear and go fetch Twilight? It wouldn't seem right to leave her behind."

"Be a..." Spike stammered. "Y-yeah! Yeah, I can do that! Be right back!" His pony friends giggled as the dragon hopped back up the stairs he just came down.

"If we're lucky, she'll stay upstairs in bed," Lyra grunted. This proved to not be the case as a grumpy-looking unicorn followed her dragon assistant down from the library's upper level. "Never mind. Party's over," said Lyra as she made for the front door. She turned her head back to address her two partners. "C'mon. If our intel is correct, the real show is yet to begin."

---

"Outside is clear. Still no word from the Canterlot escort, and the rendezvous point was empty."

<I'm sure everything is fine, Bon. Now come on; Heartstrings and Star already have a pretty good vantage point, and I've got another here with your name on it.>

"This isn't a date, Top," Bon Bon growled.

<Well, now we're both grumpy. And Rose was so kind to me helping me pick out these flowers.>

"I'll be in shortly. Bon out."

If the library had been packed with ponies before the ceremony, Town Hall made it look like a ghost town parking lot by comparison. In fact, the building was so crowded that many pegasi opted to fly above the crowd, choosing the strain of keeping themselves airborne over the frustration of not being able to properly witness the ceremony. In the midst of it all, two PPP unicorns stood together on a balcony, high above most of the ponies in town.

"Why isn't Derpy in the air with the other pegasi?" Amethyst asked Lyra.

"Because she doesn't want to draw attention to herself," Lyra answered.

The two unicorns looked over their balcony ledge to the blonde pegasus on the floor below them. She looked to them with one eye and gave a sly wave. <You guys are on the comm line, you know,> Derpy said with a smirk.

<Cut the chit-chat, all of you.> The three mares looked to another balcony, where they saw Bon Bon glaring at each of them in turn. Carrot Top was only a few paces away; whether it was by choice or to disassociate themselves from one another for security purposes was anypony's guess. <Doo, are you the only one on the floor?> asked Bon Bon.

<Yes, ma'am,> Derpy answered.

<Heartstrings and Star have a decent vantage up here,> Bon Bon stated. <I think Top and I can afford to head your way for crowd control.>

<If you say so, ma'am.>

Bon Bon turned to Carrot Top, who nodded in reply. Making their way to the nearest staircase, they staggered their descent down to the main floor, where they joined their pegasus counterpart among the thickest part of the crowd.

"See anything yet?" Bon Bon asked Derpy once they were within earshot of one another.

"Quiet night from what I can tell," Derpy replied without making eye contact.

"I still haven't heard anything from Princess Celestia's escort," Bon Bon told her. "That bothers me."

"Perfectly understandable, but bear in mind that they were supposed to have a discreet arrival," Derpy reminded her. "Any small giveaway that she arrived could have put the town into a frenzy."

"I still don't like it." Bon Bon turned to look at their secondary target, standing only a few meters from the two of them. Without warning, the pink menace known as Pinkie Pie shot up next to Twilight Sparkle.

"Isn't this EXCITING?!"

Bon Bon groaned. "I simply cannot stand that mare..."

<Don't worry about it,> Carrot Top told her from a few paces away. Bon Bon glanced at her, but otherwise didn't acknowledge that she had been spoken to. <It's not like we're being paid to protect her as well,> Carrot finished.

Before Bon Bon could retort, a symphony of birdsong cut her off to announce the beginning of the ceremony.

"Fillies and Gentlecolts!" an aged mare on stage began, "As mayor of Ponyville, it is my great pleasure to announce the beginning of the Summer Sun Celebration!"

Back up on a balcony, Amethyst could start to feel her heart beat a little faster. "This is actually kind of exciting," she whispered to Lyra over the sound of cheering ponies. "I've never seen Celestia up close before."

"Princess Celestia," Lyra replied. "And... Me neither! I'm so excited!"

Amethyst turned to Lyra; the mint-green unicorn's golden eyes were wide and dancing in a way that Amethyst had never seen before. "Err, Lyra? Are you—"

Bon Bon's voice buzzed into their conversation. <Heartstrings, Doo just got a head count. I want one more pony on the floor.>

"What?!" Lyra hissed. "And you picked me?!"

<I did. Move.>

Lyra snorted. "Whatever. View's all yours, kid," she said to Amethyst as she left. Before long her voice switched over to their communications device. <Enjoy it for me, will ya?>

"Yeah, I... I will." Amethyst couldn't help but feel bad for her partner; one of them had clearly been more eager for the event than the other. She spotted Lyra once the mare reached level, and continued to watch as Lyra crept up behind their new handler.

The sneaking pony leaned gingerly into Bon Bon's ear and cooed, <Hey, buuuuddy!>

<Knock it off!> Bon Bon spat, swinging a hoof back at her antagonist. <We shouldn't be seen together!>

Lyra dodged the hoof and stuck her tongue out. <Now that hurts.>

<Tell me about it,> Carrot Top said from afar. Bon Bon turned to glare at Lyra, but the unicorn was already a few paces back. Lyra didn't return any looks; she appeared far too thrilled about what was being said on stage.

Amethyst watched the encounter from afar and couldn't help but chuckle to herself. She then noticed how near Twilight was to all of them, but before she could ask if they were close enough for the purple unicorn to hear what they were saying, she saw Twilight look out of one of the hall's windows. Amethyst followed her gaze to see the moon shining brightly in the distance. In a soft flash, the spots on its surface — shaped like a mare's face in profile — vanished, leaving only a pale white orb behind. Amethyst's heart skipped a beat, and when she looked back to Twilight, she could tell that the studious pony had seen what happened as well.

"Uh, guys?"

<Bon Bon, move a little, I can't see!>

<Oh, really? How's this?>

<YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT—!>

"Guys!"

<WHAT, Agent Star?>

Horns blared, and a curtain rose at the front balcony, signaling Princess Celestia's arrival. When the spotlight moved to greet her, however, the space stood bare with the exception of Rarity, who had pulled the curtain. Whispers filtered throughout the crowd.

<I knew something was wrong!> snarled Bon Bon. <Heartstrings, Doo, check the perimeter!>

<Didn't you do that before the—>

<Yes I did, but do you have any better—?!>

Amethyst cleared her throat loud enough for the sound to carry over the comm line, silencing her coworkers. "Guys, uh, I'm not sure how to say this, but Celestia's disappearance isn't what I was trying to get your attention about."

<Princess Celestia, Star. Then what exactly—?>

Gasping ponies drowned out their communications devices. That, or Bon Bon had the rest of her inquiry stricken from her. An aura as deep in color as the night sky seeped onto the balcony Princess Celestia was to appear on, and in an instant an armored alicorn as black as darkness itself stood on the stage before the citizens of Ponyville.

One of Amethyst's partners was close enough to Twilight Sparkle that the student's voice carried over the comm link: <Nightmare Moon!>

Amethyst swallowed. "Um... That. Essentially."

Comments

[The One Hammer]

"Well, it is the girls room!" she heard Carrot Top answer. "It's not like any boys will be in here lifting the seats!"

Best. Logic. Ever.

[Zocarik]

Fun. More. Please

Derpy as a spy. I give you for that idea.

[Starguy135]

Once the bathroom door closed behind them, Bon Bon said,"All right, ladies; pick a stall."
Amethyst tilted her head. "And what do we—?"
"Lift the seat on the toilet."
"...Pardon?"

Welcome to the Ministry of Magic
Usually it's either Derpy Hooves or Ditzy Doo, this is the first time I've seen it as Derpy Doo.

[Aura Zero]

when i read the summary, All i could think of is Feeling Pinkie Keen.

[Lupus]

"It's not like I'm worried about a cow kicking a lamp," Lyra began.

Ha, I get it.

"They're usually not invited," Derpy interjected.

Pffft, racists...

<It's not like we're being paid to protect her as well.>

Well...

Can't wait to see the PPP's adventures in the Everfree

[Venates]

4964713 Here's hoping I can keep that interest going!

4989563

4989769

4990232 Same here. For a while I thought about going with Ditzy Doo, but I feel like at this point the name "Derpy" is so ingrained that's it's hard to really escape from. Plus, through my own messed up logic, "Ditzy" actually feels a bit more derogative, especially when I'm portraying the character as a highly trained secret agent. I stuck with Doo to avoid making it seem like there was a relation between her and Doctor Hooves. And yes, I'd be lying if I said there wasn't some Ministry of Magic influence there

4991012 I've actually been mulling over ideas for that; we'll see if I ever actually act on them

4998334 So glad someone caught that, haha. And don't worry; next chapter we get into some Everfree adventures! Should be here before too long, everyone!

[Joural]

I know I'm late to the story, but when I red the part about lifting the seat I groaned. Good to know that's the dirtiest bathroom ever seen, because noone ever washes the toilets. Ever.

[whee38]

What happens when someone breaks the toilet or cleans it?

[GreyPon3]

Just a minor pick: when finishing a radio transmission and expecting an answer, 'over' is used. When the transmission is done and an answer is not needed or expected, only 'out' is used. Over and out is an incorrect combat movie usage.

[GreyPon3]

8268472
Some of that 'inserted' equipment is probably a transponder that allows the toilet seat switch to respond only to agents.

On a grosser note, how about stepping into the toilet bowl and pulling the flush handle to enter the Ministry of Magic in Harry Potter? YUCK!!! 🤮🤢🤮