• Member Since 28th Jul, 2013
  • offline last seen Saturday

MistyShineStar


E

Rarity. A pony of fashion, being petite, and politeness. A pony that was always on top of what was hot, but was too ladylike to ever gossip. Rarity. The sister of Vinyl Scratch.
She never shared anything about the older mare who shared her white coat and was a unicorn; she could barely look at her! She was just so...uncouth. But Rarity decides she needs to start living up to her element, and when Vinyl is evicted from her home, she stays with this petite, polite fashionista.
Rarity is not thrilled.
(Cover art done by me. Vectors found on Google Images.)

Chapters (5)
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Comments ( 165 )

I once wrote in a group about the possibility of Vinyl being Rarity's sister. I'm happy to see a story where that happens.

Rarity: Ok i get it your happy vinyl now whats the announcment!

Ah, I had this same basic idea, though I never got around to writing it.

I thus award you one "Great Minds Think Alike" point.

The construction of this first chapter/prologue is just awful. It aimlessly wandered around before burying a lead that was both pointless and stupid. A tale of Rarity's gay sister moving in with her has the potential for compelling development and funny situations, but this was a miss.

Look, I'm all for slash shipping, but there was no indication from Rarity that anything would be wrong with it. The presentation type of 'oh, by the way, this is happening' and failure to use adjective form in conjunction with confusing descriptions that appeared out of place made this a difficult read.

You got all of my yes

Technically, being gay is two men being together. The correct term for two women being together is lesbian. Sorry if i'm acting like a grammar nazi or something. :unsuresweetie:

Automatic upvote and favourite for that picture. :rainbowlaugh:

4868631
technically the term gay is used to infer that someone is into the same sex, so it can be used for both males and females.

4867938 Ah, I saw a story close to that where Rarity actually WAS Vinyl. I would link you to it if I could find it again.

4867958 :rainbowwild: You, good sir, have given me an idea. If you don't mind me using it.

4868032 I realized how...badly constructed it was. I plan to fix this, but I was very eager to just hurry up and get the first chapter out. Thanks for the critique; while a bit harsh, has helped me.

4868631 Nope. Gay is universal for anyone of the same sex being together. Lesbian is just specific to girls.

I totally died right then, lost my shit at the last thing vinyl said, you fucking legend of an author :rainbowlaugh::heart:

Well truth be told I would be gay for Octi too... if I were into cartoon ponies... or a pony myself.... thus finding it more culturally acceptable to be in love with a pony... and if I were a girl... Since I am not a girl, I could only be straight for Octi... if I were into cartoon ponies or was a pony myself thus finding it more culturally acceptable to be in love with a pony... I'm already straight though... so it would be weird to say I was straight for one thing in particular... even a cartoon pony cellist... Sorry cello is one of the sexiest instruments I know of... not that I would be gay, straight or in any way romantically involved with a cello... I just think they have a beautiful sound... Okay all madness aside... okay most of it... I am interested in seeing where this goes. So I will continue to read it by way of giving it a gold star so I can better watch its progress. See you next chapter.

4872782 You look familiar.
Lol, I'm gay for cellos too! :rainbowlaugh:

4872797 Do I? Well it is a small world. You could have read some of my work, I could have read some of yours, you might have seen another comment of mine elsewhere. I do get around this crazy site when I can.

In fact I will look on your other stories and see if I've read anything before... also perhaps add some to be read later.

Nope! I haven't read your work before, though I am interested in reading Pinkie's Banishment and the other one... though I am confused as to which is the sequel because they appear to be sequels to each other... Sequelception? Sweetie Revenge looks good too, I'll start with that rather than burning my brain trying to discover the origins of the puddle-verse.

Any fic where Vinyl is related to one of the Mane Six is comedy gold.

Post edit, I enjoy how the informality of the writing plays into the comedy. It's certainly smile worthy in many moments; especially in the final reveal where Vinyl makes it appear that she has eloquent words planned explain thier situation and then shits all over it.

I'll be watching this one. :derpytongue2:

4872797
4872979
Yup, I think I saw you on a few other fanfictions for comments.
You can read both in any order, so I was like, fuck it, they're sequels to eachother. :pinkiecrazy:

4873210 If done right, of course. :pinkiehappy:
And I'm a huge sucker for OvtaviaScratch.

4873644 great man! :rainbowkiss:
I just think it was what I would do if MY girlfriend and I were caught.
I like the last line the best too, I planned it before everything else. "Whatever happens, I WILL somehow use this line!" :trollestia:
Sometimes formality in comedy writing quickly switching to informal for a funny situation can be hilarious, as well.
For example;
"The equestrian orange mare looked down at the horrible, green sin she had just forbiddenly eaten out of;
It was totally gross."
Especially with seemingly serious situations or making darkness of something simple the character did.

4874526 Well... in that case I'll start with the complete one. Well back to work.

4872797 I'm pansexuel for vending machines all thoughs quarters mmmmm

I had an idea where Vinyl is her sister and drops by (for a visit, not because she was evicted), but you beat me to it.

TELL ME SHE DID NOT JUST SEE THAT!!!!!!

4874859 And those refridgerators mmm they have some sexy ice boxes

4876340 She did not just see that.
Except she really did.

4876417 Yeah but but the cold make sit shrink

I assumed that Vinyl and Octavia were in a relationship and it was public knowledge until the last line.

(raises eyebrow) Some of us preferred the first draft. Think you could repost it as a separate chapter?

Until next time...
Anon e Mouse Jr.

4876908 Sorry, but I like the new draft personally. I'm not sure how making it it's own chapter would work, either. And I never saved it, so I can't help you with that-sorry. :twilightsheepish:

Sweetie Belle has a sister-in-law now!!!
Also would it be awkward for Sweetie to tell her sisters that she's in love with Spike?

4877071 I doubt it. They seem to consider Spike more of a pony.

Now, this got kind of stupid, too cliché if you were triying to present the lesbian problem, but oyu can still make it better, I'll be cheking anyway. (I suggest making Applejack a conservative, she got it from her pa and granny).

4877417 I suppose, BUT, people usually really do have problems like these. Besides, it only happened twice in their entire relationship; that's not too bad.

4877076 But think of the adorableness of Spike and Sweetie Belle are as a couple.

So the next chapter will start with Rarity asking Vinyl when she's going to be moving out of the guest room and in with Octavia, yes? Let us return to domestic squabbles!

I wouldn't be surprised if Vinyl Scratch IS actually lesbian.

"But," Vinyl said after calming down, "Don't talk about it in public or at school. People are way too sensitive about that sorta thing, because of religions and what-not."

What the? Where I live, those kind of relationships are no problem at all and people talk very openly about ti

4878036 They already had lived together, as said in the first chapter. :twilightblush: Octavia just chose to stay with her mom instead of at a friend's, and Vinyl stayed at Rarity's for unknown reasons. Possibly because she wanted to visit her sister in the process. :eeyup:

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